GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

CAPTION TIGHTPANTS #24 & our initial prize winner!

POSTED BY: TENTHCREWMEMBER
UPDATED: Sunday, April 24, 2005 22:59
SHORT URL:
VIEWED: 12201
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Tuesday, April 19, 2005 5:54 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?


Hokay, so, (gorramit Dayve! You got me doing it too now!), anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, Caption Tightpants winners and stuff...

Here is one that still has me laughing, and a well deserved final entry into the first half of Caption Tightpants!

SHINY! Now onto week 24 and a new challenge to open the second half.

SOLDIER (transmitting): Sir, interior scan of dining surface complete. Fugitive identification negative.
ANOTHER SOLDIER: Dude, who hides under a placemat, really?

GIVE IT YOUR BEST! But before you do, let us see who won the first-ever prize drawing for CT!
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CONGRATS to LOSTINTHEBLACK! Your reward for being so gorram funny in week 21 is your choice of t-shirts from my Zazzle site!

And if you are not LOSTINTHEBLACK, do not worry! More prizes are coming soon, and every current & future winner/honorable mention stays in the hunt for new prizes, all the way up to Sept 30!

THANKS AGAIN TO ALL OF YOU WHO PLAY! It wouldn't be much of a game without you!

Cilantro!
TCM
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
PAST CAPTION TIGHTPANTS:
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=9360
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Avail yourself of my trade! I have original (meaning: designed by me!)
T-shirts, posters, mugs and more at
http://www.zazzle.com/contributors/home/default.asp?cid=23847914695881
5760

AND
http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In Ohio? Join us!
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Tuesday, April 19, 2005 6:03 PM

SHINY


SOLDIER: Ooooohhh! Fajitas!!!

Jayne, your mouth is talkin. Might want to look into that.

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Tuesday, April 19, 2005 6:35 PM

ASTRAGYNIA


Quote:

Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:




"Hey, cool - tortillas!"

OR

"We all live in a blue submarine, a blue submarine..."

OR

"Hmm, no weapons of mass destruction here, either..."

OR

This week on "Trading Spaceships," Alliance troops tackle the Firefly-class ship Serenity...
Soldier 1 (lifting placemat): Look at the varnish-job on this table - it's GOT to go.
Soldier 2: But can we keep the cute flowers on the walls?
Soldier 3 (in background): Look at that trash bin in the corner! SO vintage 20th-century airplane-style... How do smugglers afford such antiques?

OR

Here, a squad of Alliance entymologists in full protective gear demonstrate the proper way to kill the dangerous Persephonian Mosquito...
"zzzzzzzz..." ... "WHAM!" - "Gotcha!"

(EDIT: for the record, I came up with these before scrolling down to see Shiny's entry - I left the "Ooh... tortillas" in because I think it fits better than fajitas, sorry) Oh, and congratulations, Lostintheblack!

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Tuesday, April 19, 2005 7:37 PM

THEGREYJEDI


Quote:

Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:




Soldier1: Man, where is that assassin.

Soldier2: Not under that placemat, that's for damn sure.

Soldier3: We're looking for an assassin and we're all wearing the same uniform. Does no one watch the movies?! We are so boned.

--------------------------------------------------------------
Chief Engineer - USS SereniTREE.
http://www.jed-soft.com Gamer Rigs, Budget Prices
http://tomeofgrey.blogspot.com
Real Fans Wait - 09/30/05

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Tuesday, April 19, 2005 9:03 PM

ZOL


Quote:

Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:





Alliance Trooper - "Hey Sarge, Is this a standup fight or another Bug Hunt?"

---

"How much did you say the bounty on this cochroach was?"

---

Jayne - "Jus` `coz some Alliance head honcho lost his favourite bug, don`t menn Aliance has to search under my bunk"

---

That`s 3 to be getting on with

Darin (Zol.)

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Tuesday, April 19, 2005 11:36 PM

KMS


Quote:

Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:





A secret peek at the Bubbleheads at home.

Or

Alliance Farm — like an ant farm. Hours and hours of educational fun for the children.

Or

Alliance Eye for the Firefly Guy tear apart Serenity for a major makeover!

Or

Interplanetary Archeologists excavate a great white placemat, said to be the rarest of its kind found since Earth-that-Was blew itself to hell.

Or

Soldier Bob: Ohh! Frizbees! Cool! Go long, Joe!

Or

Soldier Bob discovers the biggest tidleywink he’s ever seen.

Or

(OS) knocking is heard on the window.
Jubal Early (hanging outside Serenity yelling): Let me in, damnit!
Soldier Bob: Do you hear that? I think this placemat is talking to me!

Or

Soldier Bob: That is the biggest Alka-Selzer I’ve ever seen. Wonder who their cook is?

Or

Soldier 2: That’s it Bob, just bend over a little more.
Soldier 1: Hey! Get off me!

Or

Alliance Soldiers discover Serenity’s secret weapon – portable holes!

Or

Soldier in background with clipboard: Let’s see: mismatched cutlery, last season’s placemats, non-uniform chairs. Man, these guys are going to get a huge fine.
(Mal discovers the dangers of the Fashion Police)



KMS!
“We’re not obsesses, we’re focused.”---Gizzie

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 12:25 AM

MANTICHORUS



Once again, Solid Snake avoids detection due to the timely deployment of a *ahem* "special" magazine. (One for all of the Metal Gear Solid fans...)

OR

SOLDIER: "Keep your eyes open -- we're looking for a dangerous little girl. If you see Goldilocks, frag her."
The Alliance takes a harsh stance on breaking and entering.

--------------------------------------------------
Barret: "I been here since the beginnin', an' I still don't know what the hell's goin' on either."
--------------------------------------------------
"...I'm not a man who likes to swear,
But I've never cared for the sound of bein' alone..." -Neil Diamond, I am... I said.

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 1:24 AM

MANWITHPEZ

Important people don't do field work.


Quote:






Purplebelly: What's this? A giant egg? Holy CRAP! RUN!!! Robin Williams is coming out of it!!!

OR:

Alliance Officer: Let's see, fava beans, a nice bottle of Chiante...I've seen this before. This ship has been hit by Reavers with excellent acting skills and great fashion sense.

OR:

Book: (Brandishing Frisbee): Watch this, Captain!
(Throws frisbee as all Alliance soldiers drop their guns and run for it)
Mal: This is the crack team of soldiers that defeated the Independents? And all we needed were weapons by Whamo!?

A couple to start off...this week's is hard!

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 1:48 AM

STARPILOTGRAINGER


Woo, I won! Well, not the prize, but the last round! :)

For this one:
"Everyone thought 'Come dressed as an Alliance goon' was a great theme for Simon's surprise party, until he stole a shuttle and fled with River while they were still setting the table."

Star Pilot Grainger
"Remember, the enemy's gate is down."
LJ: http://www.livejournal.com/users/newnumber6 (real)
http://www.livejournal.com/users/alternaljournal (fictional, travelling through another world)
Unreachable Star: http://www.unreachablestar.net - Comics & SF News/Reviews/Opinions

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 3:20 AM

SIMONWHO


The Sims: Alliance Troopers! was an expansion pack too far.

Oh and congratulations LostInTheBlack!

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 3:40 AM

WICCANSLYR


PB1: No way! I've been looking for these placemats in willow reed brown for months!

PB2: Put that down! We're looking for criminals not tableware.

PB3: They are nice.

PB2: You're not helping.

OR

PB2 (to PB1): What are you doing?

PB1 (slightly confused): Looking for fuggies?

PB2: Under the placemats? What did they find the magical shrink-ray, shrink themselves and crawl under the placemats becuase they knew we'd never look there?

PB1: It could happen!

PB2: *THWACK*

That's it for now...

If life is what you make it I want Cheese Cake!

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 3:42 AM

WICCANSLYR


Quote:

Originally posted by Astragynia:
Quote:

Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:




This week on "Trading Spaceships," Alliance troops tackle the Firefly-class ship Serenity...
Soldier 1 (lifting placemat): Look at the varnish-job on this table - it's GOT to go.
Soldier 2: But can we keep the cute flowers on the walls?
Soldier 3 (in background): Look at that trash bin in the corner! SO vintage 20th-century airplane-style... How do smugglers afford such antiques?




I nearly mriffed my water when I read this one! HI-LARIOUS!

If life is what you make it I want Cheese Cake!

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 3:49 AM

VOLSTOCK


PB1: They registered for this China?! Theres not even a design on it.

PB2: I can't believe they found a Pottery Barn all the way out here in the Black.

___________________________________________________________

"I've seen you with no clothes on, never thought I'd see you naked."

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 4:05 AM

WICCANSLYR


A couple more for us SOB's:

PB1: Hey Bob, check this out. If I hold this placemat like this, and wiggle it, it looks like that lemur we saw on that earth-that-was holo the other day!

PB2: Dude! Shadow puppets ROCK!

OR

PB2: You do know we're looking for people right?

PB1: The memo said Porple. I figured whatever it was could be small enough to fit under the placemat. (beat) What's a porple?

PB2: That was a typo you moron!

OR

When asked why she was wasting time looking under placemats Private Wiccy replied:

"It's all Gojiro's fault! Damn those Irish!"

If life is what you make it I want Cheese Cake!

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 7:09 AM

JRC



Soldier: "This is Team One, sir, we haven't...wait a minute, who left this piece of cilantro here?"
Joss (OS): "Whoops, sorry, that's mine. Scene 12, take 100!"

Everyone dies alone.

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 8:03 AM

COSMICFUGITIVE


[IMG] [/IMG]

Engraved into the wood:

IF YOU CAN READ THIS THEN YOU'RE TOO CLOSE TO THE TABLE.

Or:

A Bubba Ho Tep/Firefly crossover!

(Staring at chinese pinyin etched on the table:)

Alliance Trooper #1: "Now this top line translates into, 'Alliance gobbles donkey goobers,' and the bottom line, Zoe does the nasty.'

Alliance Trooper #2: "Say what?"

Alliance Trooper #1: "Well pretty much, that's the best I can translate it."

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 10:14 AM

KESSIE


Quote:

Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:






Soldier1: But Sir, I´m sure this table was literally talking to me!

Soldier2: Nonesense! Tables don´t talk!
(He knocks on the table!)
Its only wood! Nothing more!


River(O.S): Ouch that hurt! Its never good to hurt a table! I´ll send my army of woodworms after you!

ANGLE ON the confused face of the alliance soldier...



They say it’s the last song
They don’t know us, you see
Its only the last song
If we let it be

http://www.darknessenemyinc.de.vu/

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 2:23 PM

RYCE


Steve Irwin (OS): And here we observe the Purplebellies doing their rarely seen dance of the Musical Chairs, believed by some scientists to be a sort of primative mating ritual...

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 2:44 PM

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA


Quote:




Alliance Trooper1: Ooh, is that him?

Alliance Trooper2: No, that's the dinner table.

Alliance Trooper1: Well, how can we be sure, unless we question it?

---------------------------------------------
The real-life box droppin', man-ape gone wrong thing, now without the pesky falling boxes

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 3:07 PM

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA


I just looked at the finalists for last weeks CT#23. Second time I've made the top 5! Even though everybody who reads Caption Tightpants is a winner, it's still an honor to be in the top five.

Quote:






Alliance Grunt: Sir, how does learning which side of the plate the salad fork goes on help us protect cruse ships and defend the border worlds from Reavers?

---------------------------------------------
The real-life box droppin', man-ape gone wrong thing, now without the pesky falling boxes

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 3:17 PM

MALICIOUS


Quote:

Originally posted by ReaverInA1985Riviera:
Quote:




Alliance Trooper1: Ooh, is that him?

Alliance Trooper2: No, that's the dinner table.

Alliance Trooper1: Well, how can we be sure, unless we question it?




THIS ONE.



Mal-licious

I think I will add cursing and the hurling about of things to my repertoire.

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 3:56 PM

PUMAMANREDUX


The live action Starship Troopers RPG was the hit of the latest scifi con ....

*********************************

'Trust me - I know what I'm doing!' - Sledge Hammer
**************
http://www.freewebs.com/mjspages/tempfireflypage.htm

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 4:03 PM

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE


SOLDIER:"DUDE!!!Where's my fries?!?!"

OR a twist on that...

SOLDIER#1:"DUDE!!WHERE'S MY FRIES?!?!

SOLDIER#2:*whistles non-chalantly and backs slowly towards the door*

OR

SOLDIER#1:"HEY LOOK!I CAN MAKE SHADOW PUPPETS!!!HAHAHAHa....ha...."

OR

The alliance soldiers, try as they might, weren't too good at the mass pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey-while-blindfolded game after the Unification Day Bash.

OR

SOLDIER:"Has anyone seen my car keys?"

OR

SOLDIER:"CRAP!!I dropped my contacts!!!ALL OF YOU, START LOOKING!!"

OR

SOLDIER:"GORAMMIT!!I SAID CONGA LINE!!!"

/\/\/\/\/\/\


Check out MY Caption Game(inspired by this) at:
http://www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01/
It's Round #2!!
P.S-if you make a caption, please leave your name or a codename so i don't have 10 anonymous captions to choose from when voting time comes around...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Time for some thrilling heroics!!!

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 4:32 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?


Quote:

Originally posted by Wiccanslyr:
A couple more for us SOB's:

PB1: Hey Bob, check this out. If I hold this placemat like this, and wiggle it, it looks like that lemur we saw on that earth-that-was holo the other day!

PB2: Dude! Shadow puppets ROCK!



*SNORTED MY MILK! TYVM!*
We SOB's really know how to 'dig!
EEEE! EEEE! EEEET!

Gawd I love a good inside joke...whooo...


Cilantro!
TCM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Avail yourself of my trade! I have original (meaning: designed by me!)
T-shirts, posters, mugs and more at
http://www.zazzle.com/contributors/home/default.asp?cid=23847914695881
5760

AND
http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In Ohio? Join us!
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 4:41 PM

JRC




Alliance Trooper: "Someone's been eating MY porridge and they ate it all UP!"



Everyone dies alone.

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 4:43 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?


Quote:





Soldier 1(in one voice): ...and we shall call it...This Land...
Soldier 1(in second voice): I think we should call it your grave! Rowr!
Soldier 1(voice one): AHHH! Oh dear God in heav--
Soldier 2: What the hell are you doing now, Washburne?
Soldier 1: Ummm...getting demoted to fry cook?
Soldier 2: Damn straight.



Cilantro!
TCM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Avail yourself of my trade! I have original (meaning: designed by me!)
T-shirts, posters, mugs and more at
http://www.zazzle.com/contributors/home/default.asp?cid=23847914695881
5760

AND
http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In Ohio? Join us!
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 4:56 PM

WICCANSLYR


Quote:

Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

*SNORTED MY MILK! TYVM!*
We SOB's really know how to 'dig!
EEEE! EEEE! EEEET!

Gawd I love a good inside joke...whooo...







Like that one? Try this one...


PB1: Dasmit Porple! If I have to tell you this one more time the party's over! The scumbug STAYS IN THE HOTTUB!

If life is what you make it I want Cheese Cake!

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 5:19 PM

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA


Quote:

Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:




Zoe: Sir, why are we wearing these armored Alliance suits to dinner?

Wash: Because the washing machine is broken and Kaylee's too busy chasing space monkeys out of the engine room to fix it.

Zoe: But why do we need the helmets on during dinner?

Mal: Have you ever seen an old movie made on Earth-That-Was, called "Starship Troopers"?

Zoe: Yes sir.

Mal: Then you know what happens when you don't have your helmet on.



(that was the first of MANY gross-out moments from that film)


(edit= puntuation error)
(edit= spelling error )
(another friggin edit= forgot 2 words,and if I have to make another edit: )
---------------------------------------------
The real-life box droppin', man-ape gone wrong thing, now without the pesky falling boxes

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 5:19 PM

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA


arrrggg, gorram double-posts

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 5:32 PM

CHOLLETT


As the rest of the squad looked on in strained silence, Private Jones prepared to give Private Smith the worst surprise wedgie of his life.

lol. or....

Soldier #1: "I still can't find the gummy bear you said was here."
Soldier #2: "No, it's there all right, keep looking........"

or


Soldier #1: "Hey everyone! Look what I found!"
Soldier #2: "What is it?"
Soldier #3: "Is it gold?"

"When your miracle gets here, you just pound this button once." -Alan Tudyk, in a message to Joss with the packaged button, about the Firefly movie

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 5:59 PM

KAYLEE4SIMON


After FOX hears about the DVD sales of Firefly they force the BDHs to do a new reality show in space.

Keep shiny!

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 7:33 PM

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE


*both whispering*
SOLDIER#2:"*Sir, there are some strange people looking at us from outside....*"

SOLDIER#1:"*I know, just keep looking like you're doing something important......*"

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

My own caption game!
www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Time for some thrilling heroics!

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 8:50 PM

JRC




Trooper: "Team One in mess hall, sir, still no sign of the Space Herpes."

Everyone dies alone.

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 9:21 PM

ZOL


Quote:


Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:





"The Alliance Easter Egg Hunt continues ..."

Darin (Zol.)

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Thursday, April 21, 2005 2:05 AM

MANWITHPEZ

Important people don't do field work.


Quote:






Old Detroit was pretty much cleaned up now that Robocop was patrolling, but, when he brought in his son, Robocop Jr., then things really started looking up.

OR:

Alliance Officer 1: What were these guys eating in here?

Alliance Officer 2: I don't know, but it smells like crotch!

OR:

Purplebelly: Man, that Shepherd must be really, really religious. Look at the size of this communion wafer!

OR:

Mal thought "in the black" was a safe place to be until that damn Alliance Pier 1 opened up.

OR:

Apparently, at the corner of "no and where", you can still get harrassed for running a stop sign.

OR:

Everyone laughed when the sergeant pulled the major's chair out from under him. Laughed until he ended up in the brig, that was.

OR:

Alliance Officer 1: Hey, cool! Strawberries!

Kaylee (OS): NOOOOO!!!

OR:

The Alliance had a good time eating all the fruit aboard Serenity, until they found Jayne's cache of special "Griswold Apples".

OR:

Purplebelly1: Dude, this ship is filthy!

Purplebelly2: Yeah, I know, but check it out...free table chamois!

OR:

(and this one is a long one)

Alliance Officer 1: What did the captain of this rig say his name was?

Alliance Officer 2: Umm...Kraptoken? Klaptraptin? Harboktikking? I can't remember.

Alliance Officer 1: Doesn't matter. Says right here his name is Malcolm Reynolds.

Alliance Officer 2: Not THE Malcolm Reynolds! Not the sergeant who shot you in the ass on Hera and left you to die...or have ass pain!

Alliance Officer 1: One and the same. (Draws gun) I've gotta bullet with his name on it right here.

Alliance Officer 2: We'll have to cut through the nursery. Isn't that where they took the guy they found on this ship?

Alliance Officer 1: I don't see how that's going to matter.

OR:

Purplebelly1: Who're we looking for again?

Purplebelly2: Simon and River Tam...Oh wait, there they are, on the outside of the ship.

Purplebelly1: (Beating on window) Don't make me come out there!

OR:

Alliance Officer 1: Yep, River Tam's been here...See the whoopie cushion on that chair?

Alliance Officer 2: Who's chair is it? Oh wait, there's a name on the back...Jayne...Cobb.

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Thursday, April 21, 2005 7:24 AM

JRC




Mal: "Wow, that new house cleaning service looks tough!"
Zoe: "Uh, yes sir, lets just stay out here in the shuttle for now, sir."

Everyone dies alone.

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Thursday, April 21, 2005 12:48 PM

MUTT999



Alliance scavenger hunt:

1) red button....check
2) CG cockroach..check
3) redhead in a box...check
4) catalyzer...check
5) dinosaur...check
6) shredded bible...check
7) placemat

(PB): "Got it!!!"








"That's the buffet table....."

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Thursday, April 21, 2005 2:50 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?


Quote:






PB1: Look guys! If I hold this in my hand, under the light, I can do a shadow puppet of a Firefly, and I am ON a Firefly! Shiny, eh?
Other PBs (in unison): *GROAN*

OR

"Mighty finite shindig."

OR

[A typical gaming session at the Alliance training facility on Georgia]
Game Master: Okay, you arrive at a grassy knoll. Sitting atop the hill is a gazebo--
Player A: I draw my bow and shoot an arrow at it!
GM: Dude, it's a gazebo.
Player A: I do it anyway.
GM: *sigh* Okay so now there is an gazebo with an arrow sticking out of it.
Player A: Didn't I hurt it?
GM: No, it is a gazebo!
Player A: Gorrammit! Stupid Earth-that-was RPGs...
Player B: I attack it with my axe! *dice clatter* Shiny! A natural 20! I crit!
GM: *rolls eyes* Okay, so you have splintered the gazebo all over the hill.
Players (in unison): Huzzah!
Player B: What treasure do we get?
Player C: Maybe it's gold!
Player D: I hope we get some funny hats, too!
GM: THERE IS NO TREASURE! IT IS A RUTTING GAZEBO YOU BACKBIRTH KHANGS!
Player E: Well, are the any girls here? Because if so, I wanna do them!
Player F: Yeah! Hey, am I drunk yet? Livin' Legend needs another Mudder's Milk!
GM: *moans in despair*

Cilantro!
TCM

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In Ohio? Join us!
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Thursday, April 21, 2005 3:50 PM

MANWITHPEZ

Important people don't do field work.


Quote:





Mr. Burns clears out his annual birthday party in the usual manner.

OR:

Alliance Sergeant: Gorramit Private Davis! How many times have I told you I don't want to see your mime act with the spotlight again!

Private Davis: But Sarge! You already demoted me for walking against the wind!

OR:

Alliance Officer: Ai Ya! That's a lot of blancmange!

OR:

Purplebelly1: Dibs on the cheesewheel!

Purplebelly2: Damn it!

OR:

Mal: Hey, did you guys see my new Purplebelly Farm?

Kaylee: Shiny! They look like lil' ants!

Mal: And, they really hate it when you do this! (Shakes his new Purplebelly Farm)

OR:

Alliance Sergeant: What does that box say, soldier?

Private: Momma's Little Bakery, Chicago That Was, sir!

Alliance Sergeant: Alright men! Who wants to take down the interplanetary cheesecake conglomerate Momma's Little Bakery? How about you, Private Bing?

OR:

Alliance Sergeant: Hey, private! My helmet could use some buffin'!

Alliance Private: Every Gorram time we have to put on the helmets, the same joke! Get some new material, Sarge.

OR:

Purplebelly: Who's halitosis on this boat is so bad they need a Clorets this big?

OR:

Alliance Private: Check it out, Sarge...Wax on, Wax off!

Alliance Sergeant: I don't get it, private.

OR:

Alliance Sergeant: Okay! Bend down and touch your toes...Gotcha! I didn't say Dr. Tam says!

OR:

Thanks to the efforts of the mighty Anglo-Sino Allinace, this kitchen table will not fall into the wrong hands!

And, that's all I got for now...Back with more bad captions tomorrow!

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Thursday, April 21, 2005 7:46 PM

CHOLLETT


Soldier: "Commander, i think you have a problem with your plates being missing..."

"When your miracle gets here, you just pound this button once." -Alan Tudyk, in a message to Joss with the packaged button, about the Firefly movie

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Friday, April 22, 2005 2:23 AM

MANWITHPEZ

Important people don't do field work.


The reality quotient really gets upped on new episodes of "Red vs Blue".

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Friday, April 22, 2005 3:18 AM

RYCE


PB 1: Here River (whistles) come out come out wherever you are!
(Reaver jumps out and launches himself at another Purplebelly)
PB 1: Gah! I said 'River' not 'Reaver'!!!

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Friday, April 22, 2005 3:34 AM

STARPILOTGRAINGER


The Unification War Recreation Society winds up in the wrong place for their annual get together due to a careless typo on the Cortex.

PB1: No, wait guys, I think we're supposed to be doing the Battle OF Serenity. Why would we be having a Battle ON Serenity?

Star Pilot Grainger
"Remember, the enemy's gate is down."
LJ: http://www.livejournal.com/users/newnumber6 (real)
http://www.livejournal.com/users/alternaljournal (fictional, travelling through another world)
Unreachable Star: http://www.unreachablestar.net - Comics & SF News/Reviews/Opinions

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Friday, April 22, 2005 3:56 AM

WICCANSLYR


Quote:

Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:
Quote:


[A typical gaming session at the Alliance training facility on Georgia]
Game Master: Okay, you arrive at a grassy knoll. Sitting atop the hill is a gazebo--
Player A: I draw my bow and shoot an arrow at it!
GM: Dude, it's a gazebo.
Player A: I do it anyway.
GM: *sigh* Okay so now there is an gazebo with an arrow sticking out of it.
Player A: Didn't I hurt it?
GM: No, it is a gazebo!
Player A: Gorrammit! Stupid Earth-that-was RPGs...
Player B: I attack it with my axe! *dice clatter* Shiny! A natural 20! I crit!
GM: *rolls eyes* Okay, so you have splintered the gazebo all over the hill.
Players (in unison): Huzzah!
Player B: What treasure do we get?
Player C: Maybe it's gold!
Player D: I hope we get some funny hats, too!
GM: THERE IS NO TREASURE! IT IS A RUTTING GAZEBO YOU BACKBIRTH KHANGS!
Player E: Well, are the any girls here? Because if so, I wanna do them!
Player F: Yeah! Hey, am I drunk yet? Livin' Legend needs another Mudder's Milk!
GM: *moans in despair*



ROTFLMAO!!!

Just remember I'm the Queen!

Oh wait you weren't there for that.

*points and laughs*

If life is what you make it I want Cheese Cake!

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Friday, April 22, 2005 4:58 PM

DRAGONWINE


PB: What are we looking for Sarge?
Sarge: Asleep at the briefing again! You were told a dozen times! We're looking for a caption!
PB muttering under breath: We don't need no stinkin' caption. We need another 100 episodes.

It's a nothing part til you don't got one, then you have to go to ebay.....aaaaagh!

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Friday, April 22, 2005 6:13 PM

MANWITHPEZ

Important people don't do field work.


Quote:





Purplebelly1: What's that...through the window?

Purplebelly2: Holy Crap! Its TenthCrewMember...And it looks like he's lookin' for a caption!

Purplebelly1: I thought so! Men, prepare to fire!


OR:

River: Going back the downslide. Purple is my favorite color...

Mal: I hate to interrupt you in the middle of your CRAZY time while we're hiding under this table...but there are at least six Alliance Soldiers in this room right now.

River: Maybe they'll look better in red...


OR:

Alliance Soldier 1: There, are thou happy? A pack of blessings lie upon thy back, and you know it not!

Alliance Soldier 2:bù dié shā shì bǐ yà !!!

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Friday, April 22, 2005 6:13 PM

MANWITHPEZ

Important people don't do field work.


Quote:





Purplebelly1: What's that...through the window?

Purplebelly2: Holy Crap! Its TenthCrewMember...And it looks like he's lookin' for a caption!

Purplebelly1: I thought so! Men, prepare to fire!


OR:

River: Going back the downslide. Purple is my favorite color...

Mal: I hate to interrupt you in the middle of your CRAZY time while we're hiding under this table...but there are at least six Alliance Soldiers in this room right now.

River: Maybe they'll look better in red...


OR:

Alliance Soldier 1: There, art thou happy? A pack of blessings lie upon thy back, and you know it not!

Alliance Soldier 2:bù dié shā shì bǐ yà !!! I just wanted to find River Tam!!!

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Friday, April 22, 2005 7:20 PM

THATWEIRDGIRL


Quote:

Originally posted by manwithpez:
The reality quotient really gets upped on new episodes of "Red vs Blue".



*snort* *narf*
that's funny


www.thatweirdgirl.com
---
Can we not revel in our cyber-love?

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Friday, April 22, 2005 7:23 PM

MANWITHPEZ

Important people don't do field work.


Hey! NARF...is it too much to ask that you are an Animaniacs fan? Cause, that could be love...or fate...or root beer...or maybe I've watched too much X-Files...and cartoons for that matter!

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Friday, April 22, 2005 7:27 PM

THATWEIRDGIRL


I have to be honest with ya here, Jake turned me on to Pinky and the Brain. I didn't really watch it back when it was on, sorry. But I do enjoy it now.

...you can never watch too many cartoons!

www.thatweirdgirl.com
---
Can we not revel in our cyber-love?

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