CAPTION TIGHTPANTS #37 by TenthCrewMember

GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

CAPTION TIGHTPANTS #37

POSTED BY: TENTHCREWMEMBER
UPDATED: Wednesday, August 10, 2005 04:50
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VIEWED: 13297
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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 4:30 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Hoo hooo! Way to go CALLMESERENITY! A classic caption if ever there was one...

BDM - Big Damn Mints! LOL! Now onto everyone's champion geese juggler, shadow puppet master, and fry cook turned pilot, Hoban Washburne!

Wash: --sudden but inevitable betrayal!"
Stego: Dude, what is with this guy? Doesn't he know any other lines?
T-Rex: I know what you mean. If he says "Mine--
Wash: --is an evil laugh now DIE!!!"
T-Rex: That's it! I'm calling my agent. Last time I work as an extra for Joss Hwoondan...

Not my best caption ever. y'all should have no trouble topping it!

BWAH!
TCM

The BIG DAMN LINK to the CAPTION TIGHTPANTS game!
You can play today!
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 4:44 PM

WICCANSLYR

Wash: Must. Boost. Signal!

Mal: (OS) Wash? Those aren't tools you know.

Or:

Tran: DIE!

Steg: You can kill me but you CAN'T STOP THE SIGNAL!

If life is what you make it I want Cheese Cake!

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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 4:47 PM

STARPILOTGRAINGER

Wash was furious when someone pulled back the screen and revealed he was using illegal props in his shadow-play.

Star Pilot Grainger
"Remember, the enemy's gate is down."
LJ: http://www.livejournal.com/users/newnumber6 (real)
http://www.livejournal.com/users/alternaljournal (fictional, travelling through another world)
Unreachable Star: http://www.unreachablestar.net - Comics & SF News/Reviews/Opinions
This week: My spoiler-free Serenity review

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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 5:06 PM

STARPILOTGRAINGER

Wash: Grr! Argh!

or:

Wash: "... and _that_ is how babies are made! Any questions?"

Mal (OS): "Now don't you wish you'd just asked the doctor, Jayne?"

Star Pilot Grainger
"Remember, the enemy's gate is down."
LJ: http://www.livejournal.com/users/newnumber6 (real)
http://www.livejournal.com/users/alternaljournal (fictional, travelling through another world)
Unreachable Star: http://www.unreachablestar.net - Comics & SF News/Reviews/Opinions
This week: My spoiler-free Serenity review

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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 5:47 PM

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE

WASH:"GORRAMIT!!WHO GLUED MY DINOS TOGETHER!!!"

OR

WASH:"Comon you two!Fight eachother!Would you at least start some sudden but inevitable betrayals or something?"

DINOS:"We prefer cuddling."

OR

JOSS(os):"Would you please cut that out and go get ready, we need to shoot!"

ALAN(as dinos):"GRRrrrrr!!Evil red-haired man says we must leave!We should kill him now!!!"

JOSS(os):"I can fire you."

ALAN:"Leaving!"

OR

BOOK(os)(preaching):"Out here, people struggled to get by with the most basic technologies; a ship would bring you work, a gun would help you keep it. A captain's goal was simple: find a crew, find a job, keep flying.But...HEY!You're not even listening, are you?!?!"

WASH(as dinos):"Aroo?"

OR

Wash is distracted as the evil Black Rubber-Type-Thing-Of-Doom snuck up behind him...

OR

WASH:"HEYHEYHEY!!Tyrone!No hickies!!"

Tyranosaurus:"Phooey."

OR

Wash decides to act out his plan, which is actually an idea that DOES involve violence.

OR

WASH:"WHICH ONE OF YOU ATE MY WIFE SOUP?"

DINOS:"AHHhh stop it!You're hurting us!!!

OR

WASH(as dinos):"Oh god, oh god, we're BOTH going to die!!"

OR

WASH:"Forget that violence is GOING to ensue, violence is ensuing as we speak!!!"

OR

WASH(to dinos):"Now stego, do you swear to love honour, and obey?"

STEGO:"I d...HEY!"

WASH:"Sorry, hehe, couldn't help it."

/\\/\/\/\/\/\

Tis all for now!

TCM, feel free to make captions for mine!!!It's here now!

-Noel

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01

Time for some thrilling heroics!

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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 6:34 PM

SHINY

Wash had grown frustrated at the continued failure of his StegoRex Cross-breeding project...

Jayne, your mouth is talkin. Might want to look into that.

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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 7:52 PM

SOONERTHEBETTER

*slightly adult response*...

ZOE: "Dear, when I suggested using toys to spice up our sex life..."

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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 8:00 PM

METAGROG

In the Land of the Lost, the little known Washosaur reigns supreme as the Apex predator of an uncivilized land.

No matter how depressed you get, just remember this one important rule:
I am someone's fetish.

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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 9:48 PM

THEDUKE

Mal: Have you not managed to get them to mate yet?
Wash: I'm working on it!

I'll prob post some more after i've had chance to think

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We achieved the impossible, and that makes us mighty
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 9:48 PM

THEDUKE

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Tuesday, August 2, 2005 10:25 PM

LETSBEBADGUYS

Wash got so annoyed with the sensors he started smashing it with the dinosaurs. It didn't help. In fact the reason it didn't work was he forgot the magic 3 buttons.

My first one, and it's a bit rubbish but never mind

"We're not gonna die. We can't die, Bendis. You know why? Because we are so...very...pretty. We are just too pretty for God to let us die." Mal, Serenity part 1

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 12:25 AM

AMYGDALA

Keen to maintain a pacifist exterior, Wash chose to channel his aggressive impulses through role play:

Stegosaurus: Wash, I'm going to take your wife on yet another deadly dangerous mission.

T-rex: Well SIR, Cap'n SIR, let's see how you manage that .... without your head. HAHAHAHA!

----
"She was naked, and all ... articulate."

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 1:51 AM

SIMONWHO

Brontosaurus: Inappropriate touching!
T-Rex: This isn't fun for anybody.

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 2:54 AM

CALLMESERENITY

EEEK! I can't believe I won!!!
*faints*

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 2:59 AM

CITIZEN

The crew looked on doubtfully as Wash furiously outlined his dream for a "Jurrasic World" theme park.

Q: What do you have when you are holding two little green balls in your hand.
A: Kermit's undivided attention.

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 3:07 AM

RELFEXIVE

WASH (as T Rex): GRRR! Die Zoe-saur!!

ZOE (offscreen): What was that, dear?

WASH: Nothing!

...OR

No matter what he did, Wash could not wipe that smile off the face of the T Rex.

"My God - you're like a trained ape. Without the training."

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 3:20 AM

RELFEXIVE

For the ker-razy Serenity² thread folk out there...

Wash got a mite tetchy after seeing the strange egg his two dinosaurs laid on his console...

"My God - you're like a trained ape. Without the training."

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 5:15 AM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

T-rex: You wanna go little dino?
Stego: Only if it is someplace with candlelight.

OR

WASH: Mate, gorramit, mate!
T-rex: Stop with the pushing!
Stego: Dude, how do you expect us to do this with you watching?

OR

Once mighty rulers of a fertile kingdom known as THIS LAND, the Plasticosaurs are surprised by the Hobanosaur's arrival and are easily defeated.

OR

WASH teaches Ballroom Dancing to the dinos.

OR

Wash: Gorramit to all ruttin' hell! These 3D puzzles are hard to make the pieces fit!

OR

Wash (voice for stego): Come here and give me a big wet kiss!
Wash (voice for T-rex): Oh yeah!
Wash (voice for both): *Mmmwah mmwah slurp schlorp mmwah!*
Stego(thinking): This is so embarassing.
T-Rex(thinking): This is my favorite role-play!

BWAH!
TCM

The BIG DAMN LINK to the CAPTION TIGHTPANTS game!
You can play today!
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=9360
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Avail yourself of my trade! I have original (meaning: designed by me!)
T-shirts, posters, mugs and more at
http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In or near Ohio? Join us!
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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 7:21 AM

SICKDUDE

Mind if I join in?

Wash: OC-CU-PY-THE-SAME-GOR-RAM-SPACE!!!

"Don't say 'ka' until you've tried it." Daniel Jackson

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 8:25 AM

SSJ4BLACKBELT

My caption: "Reenacting one of Mal and Zoe's crazy war stories with toy dinosaurs never really did them justice."

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 9:09 AM

UNCHARTEDOUTLAW

Wash (narrator-like): Wash was mighty upset when Zoe took back her Barbie dolls and so he did what all young men do: Play with dinosaurs who later beat up Barbie and Ken for being so gorram perfect in the first place!

-Taylor

The Uncharted Outlaw!

Read My Words:
http://norcalriviera.blogspot.com

San Jose Area Browncoats:
http://tv.groups.yahoo.com/group/SiliconGulchBrowncoats

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 9:18 AM

KESSIE

ALAN: "Take this you filthy FOX exec for canceling our show!"

Or

Wash: " Watch out Spike the evil T-Rex is out to attack you!"

Mal (O. S.)" Has he been watching childrens movies again?"

Zoe(O. S.):*sighs*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They say it’s the last song/They don’t know us,you see /Its only the last song/If we let it be

http://www.darknessenemyinc.de.vu/

MY Shop: http://www.zazzle.com/contributors/products/gallery/browse_results.asp
?cid=238756307378070768

Official Serenity site
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ls.invlink&u=Kessie&linkID=36

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 9:38 AM

WHITEFALL

Woot at SimonWho for the Wonderfalls reference

.... though you beat me to it!

______________________________________

Wash, thoroughly disturbed by the news of River's psychic powers, grew frustrated when his dinosaurs wouldnt talk to him.

"Some people juggle geese!" -Ancient Chinese proverb.

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 10:04 AM

TADIERA

Lost scene from 'War Stories'...

WASH, mimicing Zoe: "Sir, you remember the time when we got ATTACKED BY DINOSAURS!"
WASH, mimicing Mal: "Oh, yeah, and your striptease got them to attack each other so we could run away!"

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 10:10 AM

STARPILOTGRAINGER

Alan: And then Nathan said, "$20 for Issue #1? Don't you know who I am?!" and attacked the evil comic store clerk until he sold it for a fair price.
Nathan (OS): "That's not what happened!"
Alan: I like my version better, it has a happier ending.

Star Pilot Grainger
"Remember, the enemy's gate is down."
LJ: http://www.livejournal.com/users/newnumber6 (real)
http://www.livejournal.com/users/alternaljournal (fictional, travelling through another world)
Unreachable Star: http://www.unreachablestar.net - Comics & SF News/Reviews/Opinions
This week: My spoiler-free Serenity review

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 11:37 AM

MONTESA

And you think I spend my time actually flying this vessel?!!! Muhaahhahahahahha!

OR

If you think you can sing that gorram "Firefly" theme song one more time....

Great way to pass the time until Sept. 30th. This is great! Keep em coming.

Mal: Well, my days of taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle..."

Montesa

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 12:30 PM

CITIZEN

I have another if you'll indulge me:

As he sat down heavily Wash suddenly realised what he had done with the Brontesaurus...

Q: What do you have when you are holding two little green balls in your hand.
A: Kermit's undivided attention.

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 1:52 PM

KAYLEE4SIMON

Steven Spielberg:(OS): And that's why I only work with CGI dinosaurs

Keep shiny!

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 3:00 PM

SHINY

I'm not sure why exactly, but I bust out laughing at that one.

Jayne, your mouth is talkin. Might want to look into that.

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 3:58 PM

DARKJESTER

Tyranno: "Cold-blooded?! I'll show you cold-blooded!!"

OR

Tyranno: "Tastes Great!"
Steggo: "Less Filling!"
(showing my age a bit)

OR

When the crew couldn't even afford the shadows for the shadow puppets....

OR

Tyranno: "I know you're hiding those beagles!! NOW TALK!!"

MAL "You only gotta scare him."
JAYNE "Pain is scary..."

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 4:03 PM

VOLSTOCK

Wash: Grrrr.....Rawr
Mal (OS)whispering: But the Hanson Brothers used cars not dinosaurs

_________________________________________________________________

"I've seen you with no clothes on, never thought I'd see you naked."

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 9:31 PM

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE

Here's a long one, but good one:

[Playing with his dolls]
WASH:[as Dark Helmet] And now Princess Vespa, I have you in my clutches, to have my wicked way with you, the way I want to.

WASH[as Vespa]: No, no, go away, I hate you! And yet... I find you strangely attractive.

WASH(Dark Helmet): Of course you do! Druish princesses are often attracted to money and power, and I have both, and you *know* it!

WASH(Vespa): No, no, leave me alone!

WASH(Dark Helmet): No, kiss me!

WASH(Vespa): No! Stop!

WASH(Dark Helmet): Yes, yes!

WASH(Vespa): Oh, oh, oh! Ohhhh, your helmet is so big!

MAL BURSTS IN(os): WASH!

WASH: WHAT?

MAL(os): You're needed in the engine room!

WASH: Knock on my door! Knock next time!

MAL(os): Okaaayy.....

WASH: Did you see anything?

MAL(os): No Wash, I didn't see you playing with you dolls again.

[MAL leaves]
WASH: Good!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01

Time for some thrilling heroics!

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 9:40 PM

SUNYATSEN

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Wednesday, August 3, 2005 9:40 PM

SUNYATSEN

Despite being the future, inter-species breeding still didn't quite work.

Kiss and make up, gorramit!

Mal (OS): Perhaps having Wash teach the crew CPR wasn't your brightest idea.

Simon (OS): Indeed.

Zoe (OS): Wash, dear, put those away and come to bed. I said I was willing to try new things, but this is too much.

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Thursday, August 4, 2005 1:32 AM

AMYGDALA

As stegosaurus suddenly and inexplicably lunged for T-rex's exposed neck, Wash realised that this was not the first time today that he had felt cause to be concerned by the violent actions of his newly transplanted right hand...

----
"She was naked, and all ... articulate."

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Thursday, August 4, 2005 6:55 AM

CITIZEN

Hehehehehehehe...
is all...

Q: What do you have when you are holding two little green balls in your hand.
A: Kermit's undivided attention.

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Thursday, August 4, 2005 8:38 AM

DOYOUFLIP

Zoe (OS): Sweetie, I know it's been a while. But I doubt dino role play is going to help much.

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Thursday, August 4, 2005 8:42 AM

DOYOUFLIP

I...DO...NOT...HAVE...LITTLE...FEET!!!!

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Thursday, August 4, 2005 9:09 AM

UNCHARTEDOUTLAW

ROFLMAO!! Winner, I call winner! Oh geez, now there's peant butter all over my keyboard.

-Taylor

Read My Words:
http://norcalriviera.blogspot.com

Buy My Stuff (non-profit):
http://www.cafepress.com/norcalriviera

San Jose Area Browncoats:
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Thursday, August 4, 2005 4:18 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Spaceballs is nice!

Ahem. Now then...

Wash: ...the Earth puffed up her cheeks and blew out the stars...gorram it...I like my version better...NOW DIE!!!

OR

Wash: The future is worth fighting for? I think these dinos would disagree!

OR

Stego: Help! HELP! *gurgle gurgle*
T-Rex: *chomp chomp chomp*
Wash: Hey! It IS all Gojiro's fault!

BWAH!
TCM

The BIG DAMN LINK to the CAPTION TIGHTPANTS game!
You can play today!
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=9360
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Avail yourself of my trade! I have original (meaning: designed by me!)
T-shirts, posters, mugs and more at
http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In or near Ohio? Join us!
http://p097.ezboard.com/bohiofireflyfans
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio

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Thursday, August 4, 2005 9:06 PM

CHOLLETT

T-rex: "Whaddaya mean you haven't thought up any good captions?!?!?!? YOU DIE NOW!!!!!"

or

Steg: "This guy's SERIOUSLY creeping me out."
Rex: "Yeah....let's make a break for it!"
Wash: "Mutiny eh? Do you know what the chain of command is here? It's the chain i go tie you to a stovetop with until you understand who's in ruttin' command here!"

(a la Mal) hyup. That's my best. Sad, isnt it? I just dont see how teh Spaceballs can be beat now.

I'm babbling like a moonbrain.

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Friday, August 5, 2005 12:21 AM

KMS

Rex: I'm the Half-Blood Prince!
Steggie: No! I'm the Half-Blood Prince!
Mal (OS): Damn it, Wash! I told you you can read the new Harry Potter when I'm done!

KMS
'We're not obsessed, we're focused.'--Gizzie

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Friday, August 5, 2005 7:31 AM

SUNYATSEN

Here are a few more:

Jayne (OS): Well that's all kinds of unsettling.

Stegosaurus: Well. That's the last time I tell him to bite me.

T-Rex: Sir, the stegosaurus is trying to neck with me. Is there any way you could swap me out for the brontosaurus?

What can I say? Puns are funny.

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Friday, August 5, 2005 7:40 AM

THATWEIRDGIRL

WASH: Arghhh.
JAYNE(OS): giggle
KAYLEE(OS): Has anyone seen my epoxy?

I'm not too good at this.

www.thatweirdgirl.com
---
"...turn right at the corner then skip two blocks...no, SKIP, the hopping-like thing kids do...Why? Why not?"

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Friday, August 5, 2005 8:18 PM

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA

Wash was angry that the Juggling Geese he was given had not yet evolved into birds.

---------------------------------------------
The real-life box droppin', man-ape gone wrong thing, now without the pesky falling boxes

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Friday, August 5, 2005 8:32 PM

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA

T-rex: NOW DIE Stega-Jayne!

Stega-Jayne: I'm sorry I put the Brontosaurus and Triceratops in the microwave. Please don't hurt me T-Wash, I...arggghghhh(death rattle).

Jayne(os): Knock it off, Wash! Even Stitch Hessian didn't hold a grudge that long.

---------------------------------------------
The real-life box droppin', man-ape gone wrong thing, now without the pesky falling boxes

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Saturday, August 6, 2005 2:35 AM

RYCE

Heehee, this one has my vote!

Now mine:

Dinos (thinking): Um, doesn't he realize we're both dudes?

No power in the 'verse can stop me!

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Saturday, August 6, 2005 4:03 AM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

T-rex: Remember the good ol' days back in the playroom?
Steggo: Yeah, I wish Woody and Buzz were still here...
Jayne(OS): I gotta buzz *hic*...AND a woody! Heh...I'll be *hic* in my bunk...

(okay, so that is one kind of horrific, but I'm not the guy who made a kids' movie with the main characters named Buzz & Woody.

)

OR

Stego: No power in the 'Verse can st--
T-rex: DIE! *chomp*
Stego: AUGH! *gurgle gurgle*

OR

Stego: OW! You BIT me!
T-rex: Sorry! I heard you were made of chocolate!
Stego: That's RIVER, dumbass!
T-rex: My bad...

OR

Because teenage pranks are fun before you are about to die, Wash decideds to leave a load of protein in his chair to give the Alliance CSI guys something to think about...

(yeah, another kind of horrific!

)

BWAH!
TCM

The BIG DAMN LINK to the CAPTION TIGHTPANTS game!
You can play today!
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=9360
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Avail yourself of my trade! I have original (meaning: designed by me!)
T-shirts, posters, mugs and more at
http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In or near Ohio? Join us!
http://p097.ezboard.com/bohiofireflyfans
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio

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Saturday, August 6, 2005 4:30 AM

GOJIRO

Wash discovers exactly why Kaylee advised against attaching power cables to his toys.

-------
Are you an Ohio Browncoat? If so, join our Yahoo group for news and events: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio/

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Saturday, August 6, 2005 12:41 PM

KMS

Rex just didn't have the patience to see how many licks it took to get to the center of a Tootsie-Stego.

KMS
'We're not obsessed, we're focused.'--Gizzie

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