Fun things to do aboard Serenity! by Melee

GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Fun things to do aboard Serenity!

POSTED BY: MELEE
UPDATED: Friday, May 30, 2003 04:49
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VIEWED: 6578
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Thursday, May 22, 2003 2:44 PM

(Inspired by a thread on the now-dead Slipstream BBS, entitled "Fun things to do on Andromeda likely to get you thrown out an airlock.")

Rearrange Jayne's guns, see if he notices

Glue Mal's wall toilet shut

Stick Wash's dinosaurs to the ceiling in obscene positions

Fuse the swivle mechanism on Wash's chair

Give Mal a mohawk in his sleep

Dye Jayne's hair pink

Set up a trip wire across the door to the kichen

Rewire Inara's cortex screen to stream porn

Rewire ALL the cortex screens to stream porn

Rewire the cortex screens to play telletubbies on an incessant loop

Rewire all the cortex screens to play telletubbie porn

Lock a cow in Mal's bedroom

Put Vera in a dress and a wig

hee! C'mon, join in!

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Thursday, May 22, 2003 4:07 PM

TALRIUS

Rewire Serenity's navagation to fly the crew into a chop shop.... Oh, right, thats already been done.

Think of something perverted when River is around.

I can't think of anything else right now.

__________________________________________________
DOBSON: I'm supposed to be meeting my wife's sister. I've only got a few days to see her...

ZOE: I wish there was another way...

DOBSON: Oh, no, no. That woman is like a dragon. I mean, I believe she has a tail. If there's any other moons we need to visit, or if we could just fly very slowly...

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Thursday, May 22, 2003 4:35 PM

SIRENKAIN

I would let monkeys loose in the engine room. Then when Mal asked Kaylee what happened she could answer "Captn',it was monkeys".

River: The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds, given adequate vacuuming systems.
Mal: See, morbid and creep-ifying I got no problem with, long as she does it quiet-like.

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Thursday, May 22, 2003 4:38 PM

SIRENKAIN

Quote:
Originally posted by Talrius:

Think of something perverted when River is around.

____________________________________________

I would bet that Jayne tried that already.

River: The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds, given adequate vacuuming systems.
Mal: See, morbid and creep-ifying I got no problem with, long as she does it quiet-like.

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Thursday, May 22, 2003 5:03 PM

KAYTHRYN

Kiss Jayne on the mouth.

Hide all of Mal’s suspenders.

Scream “Revers!” in a crowed room.

Snatch sexy pictures from Jayne’s wall and put them in Shepard’s bible.

Replace Mal and Zoë’s browncoats for purple ones.

-------------------------------------
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.
Aristotle

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Thursday, May 22, 2003 5:55 PM

KOBAYASHI

I can think of many things to do onboard Serenity. Most of them have to do with Kaylee and/or River...

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Thursday, May 22, 2003 6:11 PM

TECHBOY

Give everyone a "My friend went to the Galatic Core and all I got was the cuddy blue t-shirt".

Give Book a reverse mohawk (i.e. leave all the hair but a section down the middle).

Tell Jayne his new bunk is out in the air lock.

Start dressing up as Mulder or Scully and spreading consperacy theories that the lone gunmen will be joining the crew (hey, you remember that show, don't you?).

Try to convince the crew that they are the figments of a deranged television writer (not that Joss is deranged, but you have to be a little off to even have the creative ideas, right?).

================================================
Today, as I was having lunch, I was watching the birds in the trees and wondered what it would be like if birds knew that people didn't like being shat on. As I was thinking this, a bird shat on my sandwich. Perhaps I knew too much...

-Simon Travaglia
If you like that, check this out.[url= http://bofh.ntk.net/]

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Thursday, May 22, 2003 6:18 PM

SUCCATASH

Move in to one of the empty passenger dorms when no one is looking.

Leave notes on Book's pillow saying, "I know who you are..."

Walk up to Inara and grab her ass.

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Thursday, May 22, 2003 6:27 PM

BLUEHOOT

Its all about the interpretive dance baby!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wish I was a jellyfish because jellyfish dont pay rent.

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Thursday, May 22, 2003 8:42 PM

MANIACNUMBERONE

I'd take the ship somewhere fun while everyone was asleep.

I'd be ship's assistant doctor and give all the ladies their physicals.

I'd finally make an accurate blueprint.

I'd film more episodes.

I'd do a crazy ivan.

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Friday, May 23, 2003 8:37 AM

WERESPAZ

1) Replace all the coffee on board with decaf. Then replace all the space-asprins (or whatever) with extra-strength caffine pills.

2) Switch the flow of the fresh-water and sewage tanks.

3) Put acne-causing agents in Inara's makeup case.

4) Draw fake mustaches on all the pin-up girls in Jayne's bunk.

5) Replace Book's Bible with a copy of the Koran.

6) Put Icey-Hot in Jayne's "Hand" Lotion.

7) Super-glue all the coffe mugs to the table.

8) Replace the weights on the bench press with foam replicas, then bench 800 lbs. in front of Jayne.

9) Nail Simon's door shut.

10) Rewire the navigation beacons to broadcast "Captain Tightpants on board" repeatedly.

Umm, that's all I can think of right now. Time to get back to work.

-The SpAz

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Friday, May 23, 2003 3:59 PM

KOFFEE

What I'd like to do most likely involves me going to that "special hell".

----------------------------------------------
“It's a real burn, being right so often.”

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Sunday, May 25, 2003 9:39 PM

KAYTHRYN

What I'd like to do involves locking the good Doctor and myself in one of the passenger rooms for about a week.

and would probably end up sending me to that “special hell” too. But hey, Koffee, you and I can hang out down there.

-------------------------------------
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.
Aristotle

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Monday, May 26, 2003 5:30 AM

KOFFEE

Quote:
Originally posted by Kaythryn:
But hey, Koffee, you and I can hang out down there.

Shiny!

----------------------------------------------
“It's a real burn, being right so often.”

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 8:02 AM

TECHBOY

Got a couple more:

Make it so that Wash's controls only lets him play Pong

Turn the unused shuttle into a game room

================================================
Today, as I was having lunch, I was watching the birds in the trees and wondered what it would be like if birds knew that people didn't like being shat on. As I was thinking this, a bird shat on my sandwich. Perhaps I knew too much...

-Simon Travaglia
If you like that, check this out.[url= http://bofh.ntk.net/]

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 8:49 AM

CAPTBAGGYTROUSERS

Quote:

Techboy wrote:
Thursday, May 29, 2003 08:02

Make it so that Wash's controls only lets him play Pong

Wash's control does only play Pong.

He's really good at Pong.

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 8:51 AM

CHRISTHECYNIC

Pong is fun.

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 9:38 AM

SPIDERFISH13

I LOVE the suggestions here. I guess that special hell may OR may not be in store for me for saying this, but can we just list ship personnel (in the order we wish) as part of this list or is that just too easy and/or crass? I can think of at least 3 for myself...

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 9:45 AM

KAYTHRYN

Quote:
Posted by Spiderfish13:

...can we just list of ship personnel (in the order we wish) as part of this list or is that just too easy and/or crass? I can think of at least 3 for myself...

You're a genius. (And I mean that in a good way). I was going to start a thread just like this last night.

You're not Mag in disguise are you?

Here's how I'd order them, starting with the best:

1.Simon
2.Wash
3.Kaylee
4.Jayne
5.Inara
6.Zoe
7.Mal
8.River
9.Book

-------------------------------------
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.
Aristotle

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 11:05 AM

SPIDERFISH13

Why thanks! I am not Mag in disguise (I'm not even sure who Mag is, actually). How would I order them... hmmm. I have to think on this for a while. I know it would look something like this:

Mal (tightpants - heh heh)
Jayne (becaue I LOVE adam)
Inara
Zoey(sp?)
Kaylee (OMG - I almost forgot Kaylee!)
Wash
River
Simon
Book (LOVE him - but would really just want to "cuddle")

p.s. Hope you all don't mind if I make myself home here. I used to post at buffistas.org (there was a GREAT Firefly message board going there up until early in the day yesterday, when the site was brought down for reasons not known or understood by me - pout sob stomp grrrrr).

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 11:18 AM

SARAHETC

Quote:
Originally posted by spiderfish13:

p.s. Hope you all don't mind if I make myself home here. I used to post at buffistas.org (there was a GREAT Firefly message board going there up until early in the day yesterday, when the site was brought down for reasons not known or understood by me - pout sob stomp grrrrr).

Hate for you that your boards gone. And it's not like we have serious rules or anything. I suspect that if you do anything "wrong" you'll know about it promptly.

To the matter at hand (and how lame am I that I actually have thought this out-- beats crying tho):

1. Wash (as if y'all doubted)
2. Simon (surprised my own self)
3. Zoe
4. Mal (but it would be awkward)
5. Kaylee
6. Jayne
7. River (I think I would feel bad about it)
8. Inara
9. Book (poor guy... who's gonna put him in their top three fornicatin' slots?!)

Sarah

I'm a dying breed who still believes, haunted by American dreams. ---Neko Case

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 11:53 AM

SPIDERFISH13

You know, I feel really bad for Book too. I'll do more than cuddle with him. I just can't help but think of him as the guy from Barney Miller. By the way - how do you do quotes in this board? Do you just type a ">" before the text or is there another way to do it?

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 12:59 PM

CHRISTHECYNIC

quote [quote.]...[/quote.]
spoiler [spoiler.]...[/spoiler.]
bold [b.]...[/b.]
italics [i.]...[/i.]
underline [u.]...[/u.]

the periods in there are just so it will show up.

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 2:34 PM

SPIDERFISH13

Quote:
test

thank you!

(egad I feel like a dumbass now - I see it in the upper right section. Yikes...)

mmmmmmmmm, tightpants...

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 3:30 PM

SERGEANTX

Quote:
p.s. Hope you all don't mind if I make myself home here. I used to post at buffistas.org (there was a GREAT Firefly message board going there up until early in the day yesterday, when the site was brought down for reasons not known or understood by me - pout sob stomp grrrrr).

Spiderfish, that site goes down every now and then. It usually comes back up in a couple of days. I think they have some kind of emergency site where they go when it crashes, but I can't remember where... on the other hand, Haken has never failed us here, so stick around here if you like it!

SergeantX

"..and here's to all the dreamers, may our open hearts find rest." -- Nanci Griffith

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 4:46 PM

SUCCATASH

Is this a ranking of Firefly Crew you want to have sex with?

Or just favorite?

This type of confusion can cause many false rumors to fly if someone types the wrong way.

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 4:47 PM

KAYTHRYN

Sex, it's all about sex.

-------------------------------------
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.
Aristotle

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 7:03 PM

SIRENKAIN

I can't resist

1. Jayne the man we call Jayne
2. Inara she IS the professional
3. Mal
4. Wash because he is all bendy
5. Kaylee
6. Book
7. Simon
8. Zoe
9. River just seems wrong

River: The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds, given adequate vacuuming systems.
Mal: See, morbid and creep-ifying I got no problem with, long as she does it quiet-like.

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 7:14 PM

TECHBOY

Quote:
Originally posted by CaptBaggytrousers:

Wash's control does only play Pong.

He's really good at Pong.

Okay, how about hockey or tennis?

================================================
This space for rent. All proceeds go to production costs of FireFly.

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 10:48 PM

SWITCHY

AHA!!!

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Thursday, May 29, 2003 11:01 PM

KOFFEE

I would have to put them in an order of...

1. Mal
2. Mal
3. Jayne
4. Mal
5. Mal
6. Wash
7. Mal
8. Mal
9. Simon

Can ya tell I got a slight "thing" for Nathan?

----------------------------------------------
“It's a real burn, being right so often.”

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Friday, May 30, 2003 4:44 AM

SPIDERFISH13

I can tell you have a "slight" thing for Nathan. I have a pretty big hankering for captain tightpants myself, actually. I probably should have listed him more than once. Oh well - live and learn.

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Friday, May 30, 2003 4:49 AM

SPIDERFISH13

Quote:
Spiderfish, that site goes down every now and then. It usually comes back up in a couple of days. I think they have some kind of emergency site where they go when it crashes, but I can't remember where... on the other hand, Haken has never failed us here, so stick around here if you like it!
SergeantX

Thank you for letting me know and thanks for the invite to stick around. I think I'm going to. I LOVE the Buffista board but hate the fact that this (the site going down) appears to be a "regular" thing. It's MORE than bad enough the show was taken away from us. To have a message board about the show go down is just too much. Thanks again!

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