Destiny: Mayhem, bugs, and foam...(Episode 7) by CastIronJack

Feeding you marshmallows?

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 2:41 PM

Sorry Jack, I read your post with Lexa Doig as Jack, not Jayne, my brain cramp knows no bounds. But my brain is tired now, I promise We'll look for you tomorrow.

Hahaha...marshmallows..hahahaha. Hey Jack, S'mores...the word strikes fear in your heart doesn't it??

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 4:51 PM

JAZAF

As time passes the Nerve gas dissipates and the sting of the frigid water awakens Jazaf.
He lets out a cry of surprise and attempts to sit up. But a sharp pain in his side and a throbbing at his head force him back to the ground.

'What in the nine spheres of hell happened?' Jazaf asked quietly. He lifts his head slightly to get his bearings and finds himself in the common room. The room is a mess everything has been tossed about cabinets are open, chairs are all over the room, and cooking utensils are strewn about.

'How'd I get in...!' A sharp pain in his side reminds him to stay still. He angles his head again and looks at his side and notices a knife handle sticking out. Jazaf fears the worst as he reaches for the handle and pulls it out. Jazaf winces from the pain as he pulls out the ......' Paring Knife?!?!? sonuvabitch. Medic!' Jazaf says quietly. The throbbing in his head gets worse and suddenly everything goes black.

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Mystery Man on the Sereni-Tree

Navigator on Destiny

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Thursday, October 27, 2005 4:06 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by CastIronJack:
Serenity comes up to him fully armed, "Where's Jack?"

"Huh?"

"Jack," she reinterates, "Sorta tall, funny ideas..."

"How should I know?" Safe asks her, "I thought he went to bed when the gas hit."

Serenity searches Safe's eyes for any lie and finds none, "We've got a problem."

Safe shivers and looks around, "Only one?"

Serenity describes the scene before the gas flooded the ship. Safe's eyes bulge, "I've been doubled?"

"Didn't we flush out all the androids?" Serenity asks.

"'Cept Jayne, yeah."

"You don't suppose..."

Safe rushes to the Engine room to try to save the ship. (Destiny the ship we're currently on.) Serenity rushes off to find Soul or Evil Safe or Jack or, well, really, anyone. She heads to the common room where she finds Jazaf lying unconscious on the floor in a small pool of blood.

"Hey Jazaf! I need you to wake up now. You're too big for me to drag by myself."

She finds his injury, sees the bloody paring knife lying next to him. She finds some dish towels on the floor to use as bandages. Jazaf comes to as she ties the last knot, securing the bandages in place.

While he tries to get his bearings, she fills him in on what she knows.

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Thursday, October 27, 2005 1:07 PM

Safe tears his eyes away. Something nagging in his head, and not just the lump.

Safe shakes his head...robots...

Vanna, I'd like to solve the puzzle...ROBOTS..DING DING DING!!!

Safe scrambles backwards, grabs the comm, "Soul? can you give me a hand for a second. NOW?"

"ummm...nice work Jayne. Have you ummm..seen Jack around anywhere?"

Safe feels around behind him for something, anything.

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Friday, October 28, 2005 7:48 AM

Fun quiz you all might enjoy, picked it up from a thread on the Browncoats' site. Which Serenity character are you most like?
http://quizfarm.com/test.php?q_id=79387&first=yes
You may have to look under "most popular this week" at quizfarm.com if the link doesn't work. Let's keep it popular :-) Every little subliminal advertising helps.

I came out as the doctor (not the crazy sister!)
You scored as Simon Tam.
The Doctor. You have a gift for healing that goes beyond education. You took an oath to do no harm, even when your patients have tried to kill you. You are out of place where you are, being used to refined society. However, if you take that stick out of your arse you should be fine.

So... let us know how you score
Amylisai, Crazy Sister/Doctor? of Destiny

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Friday, October 28, 2005 8:14 AM

I scored as Mal 75%. Not sure how bang on that is. I think I'm funnier.

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Friday, October 28, 2005 8:30 AM

SOULOFSERENITY

The Man They Call Soul...

So I'm 100% Wash. Interesting...

You scored as Hoban 'Wash' Washburne.

The Pilot. You are a leaf on the wind, see how you soar. You have a good job, and a stunning wife who loves you (and can kill people). Life is good, which is why you can't help smiling. Now if you can just get people to actually listen to your opinion things would be perfect.

______________________

Soul, Security Chief of the Sereni-Tree, Captain of Destiny.

Mantichorus: "So is there a reason they call you 'Soul'?"
Soul (after a long pause): "Yeah. Because I have one."

http://havenofsouls.blogspot.com/

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Friday, October 28, 2005 9:26 AM

Now we learn everyone's alter ego--and it's not who they thought :-) Or maybe it makes sense, because we choose characters to protray that we think are cool and we're kindof like them, but actually we're more like something else (don't we admire what we don't have?)...

I just ordered the comic books (smiles gleefully). Don't know why I didn't get around to it sooner... Maybe too broke. Reading the "episode script that was never filmed" I guess put me in the mood for more. My local store didn't have 'em so I ordered them online, is that very bad of me? I wanted to support the local guys, but... I just spent more than an hour reading threads so I want my fix sooner! Chose the Mal, Kaylee, and Wash covers (like you care, I'm just babbling now).

Some crew member gently puts hand over Amy's mouth and stops the fan-crazed babbling.

Amylisai, so addicted Crew Member of Destiny

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Friday, October 28, 2005 9:49 AM

Oddly, mine was a three way tie between Wash, Inara, and Book. All at 69%. When asked the tie breaking question, they called ME a WHORE!

"You scored as Inara Serra.

The Courtesan. You have a job that brings comfort to people and eases their burdens. It took years of training and dedication to perfect. So why do people keep calling you a whore? You tried to get away from those people, but something keeps bringing you back."

I did alot of gray area pics, so I'm gonna try it black or white.

Jack, the Emaculatingly Dressed Pilot Backed by the Big G of Destiny

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Friday, October 28, 2005 9:55 AM

Still a Whore.

Which explains alot about me and Safe's relationship. I am NOT a tease.

Jack, Confused of Destiny

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Friday, October 28, 2005 10:03 AM

You scored as Simon Tam.

The Doctor. You have a gift for healing that goes beyond education. You took an oath to do no harm, even when your patients have tried to kill you. You are out of place where you are, being used to refined society. However, if you take that stick out of your arse you should be fine.

----------------------------------------------------------

Well, little albatross, I scored as Simon, too. 81% Simon. Could do without that last sentence, though.

So, peril?

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Friday, October 28, 2005 11:10 AM

What I found interesting is that my closest matches were only in the 60%s and my other closest matches were Zoe and the Operative... (then Wash and Book!) Thankfully, I'm 0% Jayne :)

Oh, and I forgot to mention that my Serenity patch (from the browncoats store) arrived this week. It is very very shiny. I'm glad I spent my points, especially as they only ever gave us one assignment so the crews turned out to be a joke points-wise. I need to put it on something special, so I haven't done anything with it yet.

Amylisai, good rainy day mood, Crazy Sister of Destiny

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Friday, October 28, 2005 12:37 PM

You're right. We need another crew challenge.

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Friday, October 28, 2005 12:52 PM

Re Serenity's live journal:
Yeah, that was creepy, but it said something about kinder (children) in the end, so I'm guessing they were trying to show us that bombing hurts children and how horrible that is! They've got to do it somehow, and I think people have actually become used to the photographs of crying children so they're using something new.

Just read the first few posts as a quick diversion, you're so often funny :) Your grandparents sound like mine (except nicer. I could never live with mine, sadly)
Have a great weekend, Serenity!
Amylisai

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Friday, October 28, 2005 1:00 PM

Shaloam Shabbot!

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

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Friday, October 28, 2005 1:21 PM

Back to the peril at hand.
To recap:
-Destiny is rising from the bottom of the lake,
-Jack is missing taken by evil Safe.
-Amy and Jazaf are recovering in the common room with Serenity
-Flechette and Dr.Me are still missing somewhere in Destiny
-Soul is on his way to engineering where Safe has been found by Jayne and Lexa Doig.

Safe's hand closes on an object. He brandishes it at Jayne and Lexa "Don't come another step forward.."

"And Just what do you propose doing, handyman?? Painting us to death??" Jayne chuckles.

Safe slumps a bit after realizing he was planning to protect himself with a paint brush...

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Monday, October 31, 2005 4:21 AM

Destiny lurches as it hits the ice.

Jayne and Lexa are knocked to the deck by the sudden movement. Safe springs into action.

"Runawayrunaway!!" He leaps over the fallen robots and bolts for the door...colliding headlong with Soul as he runs for the engine room.

"For the lov-a-mike...I swear, I'm gonna put a bell on each and every gorram crew member!!"

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Monday, October 31, 2005 8:45 AM

BUMP....

And everyone falls down again!

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Monday, October 31, 2005 3:16 PM

Lexa observes the fleeing Safe with cool(but sexy!)detachment, "What an odd crew," she comments.

Jayne picks up some of the tools that Safe dropped in his 'escape' with a bit of greedy self-interest, "We tried to kill them once."

She raises an eyebrow, "'Once?'"

Jayne watches Safe and Soul trip over each other, "Kind of abandoned it after the chef stole my heart."

A bit of consternation passes over Lexa's face, "Indeed."

"And consistently drained m'batteries..."

"I see."

Wherever Jack is, it's cold and despairing, FYI.

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Monday, October 31, 2005 4:27 PM

Here's a little ditty I whipped up for Halloween. Have a read. http://www.fireflyfans.net/sunroomitem.asp?i=5605
_________________________________________________
Back to the story.

Safe gets up, grabs Soul by the elbow and heads towards the Bridge.

Soul,"Mind tellin' me what was so urgent?"

Safe, "We'll deal with that later, lets find Jack."

They round the corner and bump into Dr. Me.

"GORRAMIT!! WILL YOU PEOPLE WATCH WHERE YER GOIN'??" Safe gets up off the floor again. "This is gettin' to be a habit... a very annoyin' habit I've gotta tell ya!"

Dr. Me, "Did I overhear you saying you needed help finding some one? I implanted everyone with locator chips. If you can get a computer up, I can tell you exactly where anyone is."

Edited fer "spellin'"
Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Monday, October 31, 2005 6:47 PM

If one is to mimic 'bad english' or at least southwestern American, 'ain't' and 'ya'll' are staples!

Such as:

"GORRAMIT!! WILL YA'LL PEOPLE WATCH WHERE YA'LL'RE GOIN'??" Safe gets up off the floor again. "This is gettin' to be a habit... a very annoyin' habit I've gotta tell you!"

Trim off the g's off all the ING's too! And don't be afraid to make yer own contractions!

Nice gotta though, Safe!

Yes, yes, with these simple rules one can sound as flavorfully belligerent as one does desire.

Hmmm... Implanted chips, eh? About the size of a period themselves in a little orange pill bottle with a couple dozen others that Dr. Me was going to put in his Jimmy Kimmel clones? Like the one evil androidic Safe stole and cast to the winds shortly after he stole one of Destiny's shuttles?

AWAKE THE CLONES!

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Monday, October 31, 2005 7:01 PM

Armed with humor and various other implements of dastardly function, TRM's fifty Jimmy Kimmel clones stashed in various parts of the ship begin to rise from their hidden alcoves.

Brainwashed with a contraption of evil Safe's design, the Kimmel clones begin to take out and restrain the crew!

Trebeck, with ninja-like training, begins to take out his allotment of Kimmel clones. Serenity swoons after she does her own in with a few well placed gunblasts!

Ignoring Dr. Me's anguished pleas, the clones continue their work.

Beware the Kimmel clones!

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Tuesday, November 1, 2005 3:56 AM

But Serenity only FAKED swooning because she was out of ammo.

When a Kimmel clone comes in for the kill, she whips out a tazer, jams it into his neck, and fries all his circuitry. He falls down, twitching slightly.

"Sucker." She says, standing back up. Trebeck looks over at her and winks before he kicks another Kimmel in the head.

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Wednesday, November 2, 2005 3:37 AM

"Well that tears it!! I've had just about enough of these gorram robots!" Safe pulls out his bat.

"It's clobberin' time!" (ya I was going for the cheese factor).

Safe starts swings his bat caving in Jimmy Kimmel heads left right and center, working his way to the lounge area.

Jazef and Ami being there and most importantly a computer control access point.

Safe rounds the corner to the Lounge area and is met with an unusual site. The door to the lounge area is barricaded and outside it gathers a handfull of Jimmy Kimmels. Various utensils protrude from them. Safe stops astounded by the scene, when a yell breaks the trance. A fork whistles out through a gap in the barricade and catches a J.K. in the eye. Sparks fly and the robot slumps to the ground.

Rather than get caught in the crossfire, Safe looks around, finds the air vent he was looking for, pops the cover and climbs in.

At the other end, Safe looks through the grate. Amy stands behind the barricade throwing utensils out at the Jimmies and Jazef sits on the floor, bandaged, with the utensils drawer in his lap, handing them one by one to Ami.

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Wednesday, November 2, 2005 3:45 AM

Whoo-hoo! Go Amy!!

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

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Wednesday, November 2, 2005 5:30 AM

FLECHETTE

" Hey - anyone want........."

Flechette scans the various scenes of destruction

"brownies?"

Gulp-

"Um turtle brownies with carmel and pecans?"

"Do I really want to know what happened while I was under medication for 3 wisdom teeth removals?"

________________________________________________
Flechette - Destiny's Cook

We got Crab and pig tell :Squid ink and fish scale
Okra and dasheen leaves
Chitchat and chatter :Fill up the platter
With a garnish of pure make believe
- Jimmy Buffett's Calaloo

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Wednesday, November 2, 2005 5:42 AM

Oooh! Brownies!

*Serenity takes a brownie. It's delicious! And with her other hand, she tazes a Kimmel that tried to creep up behind her and Flechette.*

Glad to see you're doing okay, Flechie!

And no, I REALLY don't want to know about the wisdom teeth.

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Wednesday, November 2, 2005 3:53 PM

Flechette! Good to see you back.

I can relate. I had all my wisdom teeth taken out. Mine were impacted. Hopitals tell you not to eat 12hrs before hand, then I had to wait & wait. I was soo hungry I could've eaten..well.. Soylent Green.

Some of the stuff you missed was absolutely some of the funniest stuff I've ever read. Be sure to back track and get up to speed.

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Thursday, November 3, 2005 12:19 PM

Amy yells at drones: "And just wait until you see what I can do with chopsticks!"

[Mm, thanks for the turtle brownie, Flechette. Glad to have you back!]

Safe climbs out of the airlock, startling Jazaf and Amy (or Ami or Aimee, whatever

) who whips around to gag him with a spoon but he catches her arm in time to stop the fatal blow.

Jazaf: "Will you join in our crusade? Will you be strong and stand with me?"
Amy:"Somewhere beyond the barracade is there a world you long to see?"
Safe (and others now reading who like musicals): "Wow, Les Miserables totally fits with Firefly! Why did I never think of that before?"

Amy turns her attention back to the barracade as more JK clones try to knock it down. "Avant thee wretch!" she cries and expertly gets both eyes of a Kimmel with a salad tongs.

Amy Lisa, who loves being apart of this escapade, and is a fairly crazy sister on Destiny Flying

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Thursday, November 3, 2005 6:12 PM

"Can you hold them off for a bit? I have to find Jack..."

Safe gazes up at the ceiling as if in deep thought..."Alas, poor Jack! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy..."

Safe shakes his head and glares at Ami, "now look what you've done."

Safe stomps over to the computer terminal and pulls up the crew locator screen. "Hmmm, says here Jack is in the shuttle...still on Destiny!!"

"Ummm guys... I'll be back in a bit..." Safe hops back up into the air vent muttering "Frackin' musicals and now Shakespeare...grumble grumble"

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Thursday, November 3, 2005 6:21 PM

JAZAF

Slightly off topic.... I took the test and it came out as a tie between the Shepard and the Operative at 69%. I was hoping for Jayne but he was at 53%.

Jazaf shakes his head to clear out a few cobwebs. 'What in the nine spheres have I been saying? I hate musicals!'

Jazaf fumbles in another utensil drawer and pulls out........Chopsticks!!!

He looks to Amy and says 'Here go to town with'em.'

Jazaf opens up a cabinet and finds a flare gun. He looks at it quzzically, 'What the hell is this doing here?' He shrugs and decides to go with it. He promptly fires a single shot and hits a Kimmel clone square in the chest. The clone scrambles around and sets a few other clones on fire.

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Mystery Man on the Sereni-Tree

Navigator on Destiny

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Friday, November 4, 2005 10:35 AM

Jazaf: you came out as Book and the Operative?
Very interesting!!

_________________________________________________

Ooh! Fire! The flare gun was a great idea. But I've got to get more ammo. Can you guys hold here? Trebeck and I will try to get to our ammo supply closet.

*tazes another Kimmel*

Just how many of these guys ARE there?

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

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Friday, November 4, 2005 11:31 AM

FLECHETTE

I got Zoe 75%

Operative, Janye and River 69%

---------------------------------------------

OKay - think boiling oil might make these clone thingys a bit twitchy? or sparky?

________________________________________________
Flechette - Destiny's Cook

We got Crab and pig tell :Squid ink and fish scale
Okra and dasheen leaves
Chitchat and chatter :Fill up the platter
With a garnish of pure make believe
- Jimmy Buffett's Calaloo

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Friday, November 4, 2005 11:50 AM

Oooh, good idea, Flechette!

(and not at all surprised you came up Zoe!)

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

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Sunday, November 6, 2005 9:13 PM

JAZAF

New Crew Challenge Alert!!!!

That's right they got a new Challenge! Here's the long and short of it:
They want Crew members to dress up like members of the Serenity.
You get 50 points for each submission.
If all 9 members of the Serenity are imitated the crew gets an additional 500 points!

I already have Jayne covered cause I was him for Halloween.

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Mystery Man on the Sereni-Tree

Navigator on Destiny

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Monday, November 7, 2005 6:52 AM

FLECHETTE

I can cover Zoe pretty well- I'll need to get a vest to make it better.

I think CMS would rock as Summer and Amy as Inara

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Monday, November 7, 2005 7:06 AM

Me as River? I never though of myself as being River-esque. But I do have long hair.

I'll have to see what I can do.

And I think TRM should do Book! Too bad your hair's not long enough to pull back.

Now we need a Kaylee (do we have any more girls?) a Simon, a Mal and a Wash.

Volunteers?

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Monday, November 7, 2005 12:15 PM

PSYCHICRIVER

*Peeks head inside.*

Hello

PsychicRiver

"Two by two, hands of blue."

"We'll take care of each other. I'll knit!"
"I swallowed a bug."

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Monday, November 7, 2005 2:27 PM

PR-you know, if you wanted, you could dress up like River. That would be interesting.

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Tuesday, November 8, 2005 3:18 AM

When's the deadline for this challenge?

Must go visit UB. *sigh*

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Tuesday, November 8, 2005 6:34 AM

Whoa!! New challenge! I may be able to do Wash, but my hair, blonde as it may be, is way too short.

Sorry if I missed the Birthdays. So Happy belated birthday Serenity, in case you missed it in the tag. "Long may your big jib draw" is a Newfie phrase my Grandma used to say. It is A good wish for the future.

Are we going to continue with the "peril" Jack is still missing..

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Tuesday, November 8, 2005 7:11 AM

Yes, we must continue with the peril.

But first, I must know what on earth that phrase means!! I know what a jib is, but I don't understand the phrase. It confounds me.

Okay, back to peril.

----------

Serenity makes her way to the ammo supply closet, only to find one of the doors hanging off its hinges.

She peeks inside disheartedly to find things as she expected. The cupboards are bare. There are a few empty bullet boxes, a bit of dust, and at the very bottom corner, one single bullet.

She grabs that and sticks it in her pocket.

"Now what?"

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Tuesday, November 8, 2005 7:18 AM

Oh, and I don't think the hair matters so much as the hawaiian shirt and the dinosaurs. We just need essence, really.

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Tuesday, November 8, 2005 7:46 AM

PSYCHICRIVER

What? Theres dressing up? Is that the new challenge??

Ooh, um, splainy?

PsychicRiver

"Two by two, hands of blue."

"We'll take care of each other. I'll knit!"
"I swallowed a bug."

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Tuesday, November 8, 2005 7:50 AM

Go check the UB, Matty dearest.

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

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Tuesday, November 8, 2005 8:09 AM

Serenity, the phase is a good wish for the future. It essential means "May your boat never run aground/ashoal".

Safe drops down onto the catwalk ajoining the shuttles. The one shuttle is open like it should be, the other...

Safe peers through the window in the door. The shuttle is half full of water and it's rising. Safe opens the door. The water rushing out nearly knock him off his feet.

Holding the door jam for support, Safe forces himself inside. Jack is tied up unconcious. In the pilots chair, evil Safe is pinned to the seat by a chuck of ice that pieced the window. Water rushes in around it.

Safeat2nd, Chief Handyman of Destiny

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Tuesday, November 8, 2005 8:51 AM

Ah, see, now that makes sense.

She must have been a pirate.

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

I have a live journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/callmeserenity/

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Tuesday, November 8, 2005 9:34 AM