Male and Female Imponderables---Guess What? I Lost Count! by Tristan

Fire, I spent the first year or so on stage, then discovered costuming and other tech work...only went onstage a few times after that.
And you have smacked the communication problem right on the head! You will fit in well here!

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:09 PM

lol

I was a Theater Arts major in college (English Literature and Criticism minor)...I was on stage too, but I knew I couldn't act. I went for the techie part of the theater. I swing a mean hammer!

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:11 PM

It only took one afternoon in the costume shop for me to realize that I belonged there. I had the chance to try everything except stage design and lighting while I was there...and still loved the costuming the most!

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:16 PM

Being able to swing a hammer is more practical!

I had no idea there were so many here that are inclined toward theater and drama. Although, I shouldn't be surprised.

It's clear this is a creative group, just from the Blue Sun Room postings.

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:22 PM

I've turned a lot of what I learned in the theater to good use in my house. I've done most of the work around my house and I can paint with the best of them!

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:29 PM

Now that belongs in this thread: being handy around the house is definitely an attractive trait!

I used to do quite a bit of painting and wallpapering myself. I redid pretty much every room of our house in Augusta. I still miss it, and we left years ago.

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:31 PM

Scene painting class introduced me to texturing walls, and I put that to good use at my parent's home. Around here, it helps with the decorating.
Yes, handy around the house is a definite plus in a mate!

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:37 PM

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:37 PM

Do you mean faux painting techniques? Or actually laying on texture?

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:41 PM

I learned both, but did much better using plaster and building up from a flat base wall. Never quite got into the colored plaster a la Michelangelo, but I did manage to make the walls look good.

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:46 PM

That is impressive! And not something that I can do.

One of my friends who owns an older house in the Inman Park area of Atlanta has talked about how difficult it is to deal with real plaster walls. Her house is beautiful.

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Friday, June 30, 2006 8:55 PM

Oh, no, the first few tries were disastrous...had to re-sand the walls and start all over again. But, with practice (and patience on my parents' part) I got better. Of course, it's been almost twelve years, so I am sure I am a bit rusty!

I hate to do this, but I must bid you goodnight...I shall return tomorrow!

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Friday, June 30, 2006 10:20 PM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

You mean I have to respond to the last thread here? Curse my love of sleep!

Tristan, in answer to your query, I have not personally had that experience, nor have I inflicted it on others. I know basically what I don't like and what I'm not into. For example, I've warned every guy I've ever been with not to spank me or I will kick their asses (or just leave; you know) although it's not that bad if it's nice and light, no man I've come across knows how to do that. Ladies, oh they know how, but for whatever reason men can't do it and it always hurts. I'm not a fan of pain. I know some people are and that is fine, but I am not. So I wouldn't, say, let someone spank me a whole lot and then say later that I "wasn't really into that". How dumb is that?
As for the pill, I've been on it for two years and it has not killed my sex drive. The only thing it killed was my PMS and cramps from hell. But I'll keep that in mind, and if my drive ever starts decreasing I will try going off my pills. However, if I do that I may show up at your house and say "Well how do I get rid of these cramps and mood swings now?!?!" Heh. Kidding.
As to firefromheaven's long post, I can only say that I'm very glad I wasn't raised by overly uptight people. It would be horrible to be shut away from my own body, which happens to too many people, both male and female.
The quote is "Talking about love is like dancing about architecture" and is from a play of the same name which was made into a movie called "Playing by Heart"
I wanted to be involoved with the drama dept at my high school, but they were complete snobs and didn't want to let me act which was what I loved to do. Basically only seniors who had been with the theater since they were freshman were allowed on stage, even if I was a better actress than any of them (Well, some were as good as me...) Anyway, I stopped trying to get them to like or accept me, and I left school early anyway and took a few college courses and then left that, too. Maybe I'll have better luck in college if and when I go back.
Whew!

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 2:20 AM

PhoenixRose, your posts tend to be wonderfully interesting and self-aware. It *is* a terrible thing to be raised to be shut off. Despite the many difficult things she has to deal with, I work very hard at not raising my own beautiful daughter to be that way.

In some ways, my parents couldn't help themselves. In others, they simply weren't willing to change. They're a product of their own generations and their own multi-cultural incompatibilities.

I am fortunate that they are still alive at age 81 (Dad) and 69 (Mom). Dad was born in a log cabin in Indiana and grew up during the Depression and then was career military. He fought in WWII. My mother is the seventh child of a European Countess (no kidding!) and her family lost everything during WWII. Mom was 8 when the war ended.

These are scarred people. They are also survivors. In some ways, they have nothing in common, yet they've been together for 49 years.

I suppose I didn't struggle for acceptance in quite the usual way. I had an early awareness of simply being different, because I am multi-cultural myself. I was born in Germany and lived there for most of my childhood, until I was 8. Then Dad retired at Ft. Benning, GA. What a difference!

I suspect that you had some trouble in high school because you're really smart. That's all too common for gifted kids.

Yes, college can be really different. I encourage you to go back.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 2:39 AM

Good morning Imponderables!

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 2:42 AM

Good morning! Devil Opus is adorable.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 2:53 AM

lol I forgot which thread I was in so I changed it!

You'll see the penguin do all sorts of things around here!

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 3:01 AM

Because you're talented and can create different ones, he makes for an interesting and expressive alter-ego for you, Penguin.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 4:46 AM

I've always loved acting, although I'm wildly inexperienced. If I like doing something, I tend to do it no matter how much I suck at it. Hence, my BSR items. From what I've seen (and taken) gifted kids get beaten down on, partly because the person bullying them is jealous, or because they've just had a bad day. There are other reasons, too, but those are the most prevalent. I took that for too many years, and have since become a kind of non-profit protection agency. Like I said, I'm just happy to be doing good works.

It's interesting how the ratios of physical strength and mental strength are inversely proportionate.

Wish I had an alter-ego.

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'It's Braedan. With an A.'

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 4:52 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Yeah, I had issues with the

administration as much as the other students. But I was bullied quite a bit up until ninth grade. Fortunately once I got into high school there were so many people that it was hard to keep track of anyone just to give them a hard time. But the administration was horrible, the whole system is broken anyway, and I couldn't take it anymore. Blegh.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 4:59 AM

I don't have problems with the SCHOOL administration..I've got definite problems with some specific students in other schools, though.

Join with me, PR, in the Song of Elementary!

*Random acts,*
*of senseless violence*
*Unexpected bats,*
*Help remind us*
*Although you did nothing*
*Your teeth will get knocked out*

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'It's Braedan. With an A.'

'Shiny moments aren't a destination any of us get to, and stay put forever. They're brief, unknowable flashes in time. That's what makes them shiny.' -GorramReevers

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 5:04 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Well you haven't gotten to the age where the admin is overrun with beuracracy and stupid rules and corrupt principals, either. Give it a few years and you'll probably have fewer problems with the students and more with the policies; unless you go to some incredible school, possibly a private school of some sort, since they don't have to enforce stupid policies that come from the stupid school board.
Yes, elementary school was a particularly special hell (in the bad way). Junior high was little better. high school was better for social reasons, worse for policy. Didn't really stay in college long enough to find out; I was tired of it all.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 5:49 AM

13 and PhoenixRose, I'm sorry to hear that you had those kinds of problems. Again, it's all too common and due to ignorance. While all gifted students are vulnerable, it tends to be harder on the boys.

Yes, the school system in the US is broken; may be better in Canada. I don't know. It's hard for everyone – students, parents, and teachers. I can't imagine what the bureaucrats are *thinking*!

There are websites about giftedness that I like, including one for a place near you, PhoenixRose:

The Gifted Development Center is in Denver.

I love this website: www.hoagiesgifted.org

You, 13, may be interested in various things in there, including this area: www.hoagiesgifted.org/kids_speak_out.htm

The beginning of the poem at www.hoagiesgifted.org/to_my_teacher.htm :

To My Teacher
by Shaun, then 14, to his English teacher

I didn't ask for it. This mind that seems to so repulse you.
It's not my fault I'm different in a way you cannot stand.
I cannot understand why a man like you could fear me.
But fear is what I see in you - it's either that or hate.
I can't think that you hate me - because I've seen the time you take
To help me when I've needed it in any other way.
Except when in your class room - and then you seem to feel that
You must destroy me utterly, to make me just the same.

(It goes on for a bit beyond this)

You, PhoenixRose, might especially be interested in the Dabrowskian Oversensitivities at www.hoagiesgifted.org/dabrowski.htm

Some of the articles are better than others, of course. Here's one quote:
“Sensual OE
a heightened ability to experience sensory pleasure manifesting in an increased need to touch and be touched, hugged, kissed; early signs of sexual interest and development; interest in food and food preparation; aesthetic interests; drama; need for comfort and luxury; need for attention and company; dislike of loneliness”

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 5:54 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

You... you mean I'm not the only one? And this is an actual sign of being gifted? I thought it was likely unrelated! Who'da thought?

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 5:59 AM

Huh.

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'It's Braedan. With an A.'

'Shiny moments aren't a destination any of us get to, and stay put forever. They're unknowable, brief flashes in time. That's what makes them shiny.' -GorramReevers

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 6:03 AM

Yes, there is a correlation between various heightened sensitivities and being gifted. Different people will primarily express (typically called “lead with”) one sensitivity over the others, but often have them all. The five areas are: Psychomotor, Sensual, Imaginational, Intellectual, and Emotional.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 6:04 AM

See this is why I teach students with disabilities. I hate the idea of throwaway kids. I work really hard to show my kids that no one is perfect, but they are just as good as the others. Unlike most teachers of the disabled, I have my students read the smae books as their peers and I work them a ton. Consequently my kids got scores equal to the regular kids on their end of year exams. They were so proud and now they believe they are just as good as others. It's all about passion and committment! That said, I think the U.S. school system is dying horribly for 3 reasons 1- not enough funds( there by creating the pay peanuts get monkeys bad teacher problem), 2- available funds mismanaged by towering burocracy( creating the few dedicated teachers get worked to death trying to salvage and scrounge with leftovers) 3- standards set by the new bush law which place all responsibility for a students performance on the teacher without any recognition of poor parenting or badly motivated kids.
As of right now I have spent in excess of $1800 U.S. of my own income to finance books, paper, supplies, and food/clothing for my students.While the people in the management section have 2 hour lunches, I get 25 min. While they get paid 80,000 on average our average teacher gets 30,000.Anyway, sorry this is so long but it just makes me angry.

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 6:08 AM

After that little post, Ms. G, gotta say I'm liking Canada a whole lot more.

Psychomotor sensitive, eh?

Eh. Teehee. Sorry, Canada thing.

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'It's Braedan. With an A.'

'Shiny moments aren't a destination any of us get to, and stay put forever. They're unknowable, brief flashes in time. That's what makes them shiny.' -GorramReevers

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 6:20 AM

MSG, you are one of the many underappreciated teachers in the system who verge on deserving sainthood yet, as you say, are merely tossed crumbs.

I'm not surprised that you are this kind of teacher. Yes, you should get paid *way* more than you do.

"No Child Left Behind" is a travesty!

I'm angry about it all, too!

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 6:25 AM

Oh, and kudos on your creativity and getting your kids scores up like that!

MSG, you rock!

You are making a life-changing difference for those students. In most cases, you'll probably never know just how much of a difference you made in their lives, but I have no doubt that it's huge.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 6:36 AM

yeah I love my little bugs. They just need love and caring and they do just fine. Most of my kids do very well in drama and I use that shamelessly to help them. ( that may be because I am a theater person) Kids should never feel picked on or unaccepted by their teachers. There are always going to be peers picking on each other and teachers should contain and stop it, but it should never be a teacher who makes a kid feel like they are unworthy.
Our principal has teacher rules ( we have a great faculty) and they are 1- NO yelling ever, 2- respect for all students no matter what, 3-find the problem and fix it, don't cast blame, and 4- it's your class and your choice and I will back you up.
That really helps the whole faculty work for the kids, but I know our school is unusual.
Yeah No child left behind is insane. If my kids tests scores don't show 5-10% improvement every year in every subject from the previous years ( and previous students) scores then I am labled a failing teacher and involuntarily transferred. If the school doesn't show improvement like that after 5 years it is closed. Now these tests do not take any other factors in to account. So the fact that 80% of our students are below the poverty line, live in single family often neglectful and abusive household, have severe emotional and physical problems, have parents not fit to raise rats, have drug, gang, and seriously severe attendance, and often have very poor attitudes toward education cannot be taken into account and we will be judged if we can't make these kids, who often come to us having attended less than 50% of the school year since 1st grade and can barely read and are far more worried about survival than fractions,show at 10% increase in their test performance each year. Oh and by the way 90% of the school has to show this 10% increase each year and the next year has to be 10% better than the year before and so on...Ok wow this is too long so sorry and ignore if you want!

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 6:47 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Ms. G...

Also to your principal.

I wish I had gone to your school.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 6:50 AM

Not too long at all. This is a serious issue that affects *everyone*, whether they know it or not, and whether or not they have kids.

It's that love that you give that heals and compels them. Drama speaks to everyone. I'm sure it's one of your strengths that you're a theater person.

I can well imagine the horrendous and totally unfair pressure that you and other teachers must feel under the Draconian -- worse than Draconian -- rules currently in place.

I'm glad that you work with a great faculty.

I think that a lot of problems that kids are diagnosed with, including ADD and ADHD, are really mainly symptoms of problems in the home.

I have to really respect the incredibly difficult job that you have taken on and do so well!

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 6:54 AM

What she said.

Too bad y'ain't teachin' my school...yarrgh, but we all can't be blessed with saintly teachers.

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'It's Braedan. With an A.'

'Shiny moments aren't a destination any of us get to, and stay put forever. They're unknowable, brief flashes in time. That's what makes them shiny.' -GorramReevers

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 7:09 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

I personally think that ADD and ADHD, when they aren't misdiagnosed, are more a symptom of too much sugar in the diet than anything else. That's of course not a very popular theory; no matter how many studies say that diet affects health, society insists that drugs are the answer. It makes me sick.
We got a little off topic, didn't we? That's ok, though.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 7:17 AM

I don't know; maybe it's a different kind of imponderable.

Sugar and poor diet can be a factor, as can emotional distress, brain development that's been affected by things like too much TV, and even stuff like the loss of recess time in school.

We bring all that we are, all that we know, and all that we have experienced into everything we do, from our jobs to our sexual relationships.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 7:24 AM

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 7:25 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

It's true.
Another unpopular theory I've heard is that complications from early vaccinations can lead to development issues as well. Also that they can mess with the immune system. I'm glad my mom's knowledgeable enough not to have done that to me as a very small child/baby.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 7:27 AM

Very cute! Or, it could just be a distracted multi-tasker!

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 7:30 AM

PhoenixRose, I spread out my daughter's immunizations because of that uncertainty factor. Kid's nowadays get way more shots than they used to -- like when I was a kid. Although, due to the international moving around, I got more than most!

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 7:49 AM

COPILOT

AD ADHA-My uncle was diagnosed last year and he's nearly 40. I also knew a lot of kids in the school days who had it. Or rather they were hyper or cafinated and the stupid adults didn't want to deal with it. On the diet issue have you actually seen what they feed kids in public school lunches?!? It comes in barrels and the ingrediats arn't even remotly nutritious. Also soft drinks in school?!? Soda is one of the largest contributers to childhood obesity!

Okay so I was a fat kid back in the day. I understand the pain and it is a form a child abuse to let your children become way overweight! It's also child abuse to use your childs weight against them untill they develope eating disorders! Also happened to me. Sorry this is way off topic....or is it?

MSG-You are amazing! If only more teachers were like you. I absolutly hate hate hate that people keeping teaching for 20 years after they just give up. And standerdized testing is wronge! Very wronge! When was the last time you met a standard person? My last year of high school had probably 3 maybe 4 straight weeks a year of nothing but standardized tests! And these crazy surveys! I think they were to develope new statitics about teenagers and drug use.

The #1 cause of teenage drug use is standerdized testing! Just a little humor to end my rather long rant.

An I carried such a torch

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 8:07 AM

Um I actually have A.D.D. and as it is now diagnosed using brain scans I think we can safely say it's not the sugar or the parents. i think it is over diagnosed, and parents and poor diet can make it worse, but I can now be clinically diagnosed as a disfunction of the frontal lobe combinant with parietal lobe damage...it's really an actualy disease same as any minimal brain disfunction. I certainly don't think any hyper kid who has trouble paying attention has it. If it's really A.D.D. it will come with memory problems, disassociative episodes, problems with visual processing, and severe impulse control problems ( for example one of mine who tried to remove his cast with a circular saw because the impulse struck him when the cast was itchy)

EDIT_ oh yes it is copilot...it may actually cause teacher insanity too...there's nothing like being locked in a room with 15 squirrly kids with impulse control problems and being forced to keep them on task and totally silen for hours.....it's like hell only longer:)

EDIT- oh and phoenix way to go for your mom. They have just done research that shows that one strain of autism is caused by the vaccines! sso yes your mom is wise!!
I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 8:08 AM

I agree, CoPilot, large amounts of soda are a systemic poison. I think that soda being so widely available -- and often, nothing else -- is a big contributor to the rising weight of the general population.

Eating disorders are really hard to deal with. I think that's partly because we must eat. It isn't something that can be given up completely.

Physical well-being, mental health, and body image are all important aspects of life and do affect us as we look for love and relationship.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 8:20 AM

MSG, it sounds as though you have your ADD under control.

I do think it's overdiagnosed. Years ago I had a neighbor who took in foster kids. One of her boys was ADD and he definitely needed his Ritalin.

On the other hand, I had an acquaintance who went through a divorce and, during that stressful time her 12 year old daughter was diagnosed as ADD. Um, no. The girl was under a lot of stress at a critical developmental time and needed a sympathetic ear. When she was about 14-15, I had her babysit for me at times. So, I knew the girl rather well. Her biggest problem was her nutty mother. At about age 16, she went to live with her Dad, which helped.

Ooh, I hope that child with the cast was all right! I hope he didn't hurt himself badly.

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 8:25 AM

yeah he was fine the shop teacher hit the kill switch before he got to it..WE're all kind of used to it with this particular child...can't look away for a min or he'll be wedged in something, stuck to something, or injur himself...that cast by the way was his 4 broken arm in 7 months ( no his parents aren't abusive at all) He's a great kid but has the impulse control of a drunken gnat:)which is exacerbated by being 14 years old.
Yeah I have when parents just don't want to actually face their kids probs so they medicate them to shut them off...Se there are ADD kids bu if it comes up suddenly in combination with other probs...WRONG that's so Wrong
Yeah dealing with my kids I have piles of the funniest stories:0 love my kids, but boy do you have to be top of your game

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 8:36 AM

MSG, you must have phenomenal amounts of energy!

I'm glad the boy was OK. 14 tends to be a tough age in any case!

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 10:51 AM

SERYN

PR, cheers for correcting that quote! Funny thing is, i've never read or seen either the play or othe movie, so i'm wondering now where I got the quote from.

Ah well, my brain is a mystery to me.

MSg, Don't worry about the needing to rant about bad the educational system is, my father is a teacher who, as he is the only one willing and capable to do it, gets sent the 'problem' kids (ADD etc) to sort out. You two could probably get some wonderfully cathartic phone conversations going.

And as a little example of how bad thing are - in a report on gifted children 'imaginational' is used. What happened to good old 'imaginative'?

Your robot reminds me of you. You tell it to turn it stops. You tell it to stop it turns. You ask it to take out the garbage it watches reruns of Firefly.
http://www.myspace.com/seryndippyt

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Saturday, July 1, 2006 11:05 AM