Male and Female Imponderables--Soft, What Light... by Tristan

Yeah, the tech girl thing is actually where my name comes from. In answer to the question "which Firefly character are most like?" I have no idea what to say other than that the scene in Shindig, when Kaylee is talking to the guys at the party about engines, that's me. I can get dressed up and look like a lady, but I'm still most comfortable talking to guys about typically guy things. (I'm actually not all that good with engines, but if engines were computers... we'd all be eating steak. Or something.)

That, plus the cheerfulness, plus the desire people seem to have when I'm around to duct tape my mouth shut, plus living in California... It all led to being dubbed CaliforniaKaylee.

And Zeek, I hear you on the math teacher thing. One of the problems with talking about trends and generalities in education is that there is *always* a great example of a teacher who doesn't fit the trend. My high school AP Statistics teacher was fantastic, and a huge mentor to me. Probably wouldn't be where I am now without her. But the scary thing about the studies on the treatment of boys and girls in math and science classes is that the teachers didn't seemed to know they were doing it. It's not a conscious ideal of "I'll encourage the boys but discourage the girls," but rather something so ingrained into our society that people don't even realize when they're doing it. So the math teacher you had may have been trying to compensate by favoring the girls. Or she may have had a preference for girls over boys for whatever reason. Or she may just not have liked you, lol.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 1:27 PM

NV- right with you there...used the phrase police my brass the other day and go a few puzzled looks, but it still took me almost 2 hours to load my freakin picture:)I can quell a near riot amongst gang bangers, but can't even turn my own speakers on...go figure.
13- yes you little weasel I was a damn good cheerleader...nice guess:)
CK- I am in awe...you are my new goddess!!!
Shoes- like I said shoes, for me, are the thing that tips the balance from being cute to being hot. and yes I have a pair for each purpose and outfit. Like black heels for work. black heels for work when principal is observing, and black heels for out with friends, and black heels for out with husband dancing ( all different pairs of course)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 1:34 PM

COPILOT

So the lovely wierdness of the last 24 hours.
I drunk dialed Former SO and told him he was the love of my life and so on and so forth.
I had sex! Yay!
The wierdness you might ask? The person was current roomate and best friend's ex-boyfriend which still hangs around a lot. I asked first and she said okay. But I don't know exactly how okay it really is. We started drinking at noon yesterday because of the holiday and we're 20 and 22 years old. So did she say okay because she was severly drunk or because it was really okay. Now I've decided I really want to find someone to be in a relationship with. Not that I want to be around someone all the time but trying to "get some" is a pain!

An I carried such a torch

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 1:38 PM

ok to make sense of this for me...your ex SO is also your roomates ex SO and she agreed you could have him so you drunk dialled and got him and now you don't want him and you're worried she's mad at you???I think I may need more coffee for this:)
EDIT- or you drunk dialed your own ex SO then asked roommate if you could have her ex SO and she let you but now you think she has lender's remorse?

SO CONFUSED!!!!!

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 1:40 PM

Nothing good comes of alcohol.

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'It's Braedan. With an A.'

'Shiny moments aren't a destination any of us get to, and stay put forever. They're unknowable, brief flashes in time. That's what makes them shiny.' -GorramReevers

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 1:42 PM

Yay sex! Congratulations!

Let's see if I can detangle this... You drunk dialed your ex, but then slept with your roommate's ex, and you're worried she's not really ok with it?

Yeah I'm with MSG, I may need more coffee for this. Or cherry pie and ice cream. Yeah.

This is a good imponderable! Tell us the story!

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 1:45 PM

yes Copilot we are definitely going to need a more complete explaination of these events...and possibly some sort of caffine:)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 1:45 PM

NVGHOSTRIDER

I don't know about y'all, but I'm going home. Hope all goes well for you COPILOT.
MSG, huh.
I'm out.

MAL: "What happen about me?"

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 1:45 PM

COPILOT

No my roomate and I do not have the same former SO. I called mine yesterday and left the "your the love of my life I'll never be the same" message in his voice mail.
Then my roomates Former SO came over to say hi and was "in the mood" so was I. Because it seemed appropriate I woke her up to ask first. She said okay but.......I don't know now.

-13 yes alcohol is evil never start drinking!

An I carried such a torch

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 1:45 PM

Night Night NV...HUGS

EDIT- ok picturing this conversation...poke poke "hey Martha mind if I boink your ex since he's here and we're in the mood"
Martha- "no, go for it,whatever"
"thanks"
I think you're probably ok as it's unlikely she remembers the exchange, but I'd check in again and make sure to let her know you are concerned about her feelings and don't want to damage your friendship:)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 1:46 PM

It was the butterfly.

That's all I'm gonna say.

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'It's Braedan. With an A.'

'Shiny moments aren't a destination any of us get to, and stay put forever. They're unknowable, brief flashes in time. That's what makes them shiny.' -GorramReevers

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 2:15 PM

Oh sure, blame the butterfly.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 3:09 PM

WHITEFALL

ahh yes, i admit i cant join in these amorous discussions, nor really comprehend the motivations of being a)drunk, and b)two people who dont know each other both being in the mood and just..... well, anyways... back to education.

In terms of tech-savvy-ness, well, my mother got a degree in technical comp engineering back when they ran on little more than punch cards, and since has gotten into software. my sisters understand computers... enough, but usually ask the help of myself or my mother, which as was mentioned above, is a little annoying (how hard can it be, explore is right there...)

As for women folk i know from school n theater, tech savvy almost all. our resident lighting and sound ladies are really quite awesome, and... in fact, with the exception of grunt work on stage crew, our entire student tech staff are female, none of this non-savvyness. Ok, that's not so much computers as soundboards n lightboards, but still.

And tho the computer-savviest person i know is male, know plenty of females that know their way around a computer, and if they dont, they'll learn. None of this bein helped stuff. Admit most of those folk are insane academic dynamo AP students, but gotta love em nonetheless.

"But, these strong women characters?"

"Why aren't you asking 100 other guys why they don't write strong women characters?" -Joss Whedon

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 3:16 PM

ok so I'm just a lone dip in the techno world:( oh well...at least I managed to get my picture posted in latest images, mind you I don't know how to keep it posted or show people how to get to it, but I expect one of you will show me how:)
Whitefall it's fine that you've not done something daffy under the influence...just use imagination and offer support or just nod sagely...works for me:)
13- just who is this butterfly and why is he messing with us??
CK- have you a butterfly net or anything???

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 3:40 PM

Yep, Whitefall, there's definitely a generation gap at work here too. Girls in middle school and high school now have been exposed to tech much more so than many of us, erm, older folk were growing up, lol. It's still not to the point it should be, and the number of women in Computer Science majors is actually declining, but things like instant messaging and video games have actually done quite a lot for getting girls comfortable with and interested in technology from an early age.

But despite that, there's still the issue of being dissuaded from math/science/tech careers, in the middle school or high school years. I've done some work with middle school girls, and they all know their way around a computer lab, but wouldn't ever consider computer science degree -- or even a related field, like web design, or teaching math or science.

But in all honesty, there's really two issues here: women being tech savvy, and more women going into tech careers. The first I think is important for liberation and independence issues, and which is, I think, getting better as the years pass. The girls you go to high school with are more tech savvy than those I went to high school with, so give it another 30 years, and being computer and internet savvy is going to be like being able to drive: grown women have no trouble with it, but their mothers may still be a little afraid of it.

The second issue, of getting more women into tech careers, is more of a selfish desire, I will admit. I'd like to have more than one out of ten at work, and I think we'll end up with software that is more intuitive to women as we get more women making software. But the first issue really is the important one, IMO.

And despite having friends at a company that was once called Butterfly Net, I actually don't have one on me.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 3:59 PM

TRAVELER

Quote:
Originally posted by 13:
Nothing good comes of alcohol.

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Well said 13. I ashamed to say I know too much about alcohol. But I also learned it is never to late to quit. Copilot are you listening?

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 6:16 PM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Wow, I missed a lot in my brief trip to Dreamland.
Thank you Whitefall, I love to have my mad skills appreciated

I will listen to the music link that was posted when I am back on a computer with a soundcard.
MSG, you look quite a bit like one of our favorite Companions!

Underwear! Ohhh, I don't much like going commando, but I have at times. I... chafe a bit without some nice cotton againt me nethers.
The lingerie I have is usually lace, though I have some gauzy little... um... outfits-ish plus a fishnet bodystocking. I highly reccomend the fishnet, by the way, it can be quite stimulating. Other than that, I go for pretty basic bikini briefs, though sometimes they are satiny and nice. Not a thong girl myself. At all.
I personally like the experience of taking underwear off as part of forplay (even if yu leave the skirt or whatever on) so I don't find commando to be all that titilating.

So, for economy to remain viable women need to stop working and have more kids than they should to increase an already inflated Earth population?
That's all I'm gonna say. Trying not to get too into a debate about it here, but it sounds dumb to me.

I love shoes! And, as we all hopefully know, I am not one for casual sex. However, if I were to chose between going shopping and staying in with a SO I loved and could have lots of mind-blowing sex with, I would not pick the shoes. And, as MSG mentioned, shoes are about turning heads a lot of the time.
Basically none of my list are just bodies I want to have my way with, either. Though they are that, too. I think I mentioned the love of sexy, sexy voices I have. Especially sexy singing voices.
I like socks, too. I am near-obsessed with having socks that match my clothing. I also love underwear but can't fill a drawer with it - to expensive.
I will admit to being only slightly tech-savvy. I'm more savvy than a lot of women I know, but all of my friends tend to know more than me. And Ex of Doom built his own computer. I do know much more than my parents.
Again with shoes! Yes, there are some shoes that only go with some outfits that are not worn all the time. It's accessorizing.

"Nothing good comes of alcohol." 13, I agree.
MSG, your picutre will remain in your Blue Sun Room forever after if you don't delete it, so it is readily available through your profile (which is readily available by clicking on your name).
I considered pursuing graphic design because I enjoy it, but as I am currently living in a place that has more designers and other artists per capita than any other place the the world apparently, it is very hard to make a living at such things. I was thinking about finance. Yes, I don't like math very much, but I sure like money.
And that was very, very long.

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 8:10 PM

WHITEFALL

Bah, PRose, dont give in! I believe it was Twain (someone correct me) who said:

"Find a job that you love and you won't work a day in your life."

Me, i'm opting for creative writing, which i suppose you folks can guess is a not so subtle way of following in the footsteps of a certain screenwriter, but hey, if i can do it i'd love to write play scripts or novels. as jayne sayeth, "keep my options open".

Of course, even if i minor in theater acting stuff, my 4-5 possible obvious career paths are all the hit-and-miss sort of bad. but really, who wants a desk job in accounting anyways? i used to, ie, money good, but then i decided that living it up > money. So, if my career path remains unchanged, i'm looking at a future that basically combines firefly and Rent in concepts (both have one thing in common: no. money.). yeah, wont be pretty, but it might be fun.

"But, these strong women characters?"

"Why aren't you asking 100 other guys why they don't write strong women characters?" -Joss Whedon

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 8:17 PM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Did I say accounting? Finance is not accounting. Finance majors make major decisions in companies and learn to properly invest. I think it could be exciting.
As for finding a job you love, especially in writing... Well, best of luck, but as the daughter of an author I know how difficult is is on many of them. Doubt screenwriters are all that different. I'd like such a career if I struck it big, but as that isn't a guarantee, it turns into a lot of money stress instead. Even at my age, I've had plenty of that. I'd like to keep my creative pursuits as being something I love, rather than being a source of stress.

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 8:39 PM

WHITEFALL

Bah, finance, accounting, wasimmer, it's all scary.

Yeah, i know that makes money an issue, but still... it's something i'd like to do, and i cant think of much else. Really it's something to get me through college, lol screw jobs, find a major you like and you won't, well, it'll be easier. Yeah, i'm not looking forward to that starving artist bit, or that fame bit either, come to think of it. But still, something i enjoy. Why not?

Also, the thing about keeping creativity something i love.... well, i tend to not spring into creativeness while being busy with stuff (see: school) no matter how hard i try. So i figure if i make creative stuff my career i could at least get some interesting stuff done.

Bah, who am i kidding, my last post was the romanticized version of my future (firefly and Rent are some of the best examples of glorifying being broke) this is the negative bit. Oh well. If worst comes to worst i'll go into teaching. Might drive me crazy while being something I love, but at least it's steady. (No Child Left Argh Act notwithstanding)

"But, these strong women characters?"

"Why aren't you asking 100 other guys why they don't write strong women characters?" -Joss Whedon

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 11:02 PM

SERYN

What they mean is that if we carry on as we are in Western countries, we are heading for economy collapse, with an ageing population requiring support, and no one to provide the cash to do it.
Some egghead somewhere has worked out that to ensure a viable economy when we are all old, each woman now would have to have approx three children, to ensure enough future workers, to pay for pensions and the like.

The problem specific to this country is that the birth rate is going up but its the wrong type of people breeding - chav's basically, who are only having children to get benefits and free housing, and whose offspring are statistically more likely to be unemployed and become invovlded in drugs and crime - basically people who are never going to pay their way in society, and who infact spend their entire lives sucking taxpayers cash out of the government.

There are much simpler ways of solving this crisis, but I can hear the human rights campaigners sharpening the edges of their protest signs as I speak.

Thats a little two RWED, but the point of 'would you ever feel obliged on that kind of scale, to have or have more children? would it play any part in your decisions?'

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 11:07 PM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Sooo.... Would I have kids if they paid me? Yeah, probably. Stronger financial groundwork is one of the things I would want before I considered it. Don't want to, you know, be one of those mothers who doesn't have time for her kids, hence raising, as you said, children who may just be a drain on taxpayers. Not that I think it would be that bad, but...
Yeah, I'm sorry, but maybe if we stopped keeping corpses alive there would be some more available funds.
I'm sorry if that sounds cold-hearted, but it breaks my heart and sickens me to see someone continue to live so long after they would have naturally died that they're not even a part of the real world anymore. It seems so pointless.

Aaaaaah! The human rights campaigners are coming after me!
*Runs*

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Wednesday, July 5, 2006 11:12 PM

SERYN

there are a hundred different jobs to be done in theatre and around it that pay a good wage and keep you close to the action, and then you persue your writing etc, in your own time, until it pays well enough to support you.
Hey, think about becoming a stage manager - they get the best wages in the industry (outside of hollywood stars) simply for being fussy and anal retentive, and you can fake those.

And sparking and channelling your creativity effectively is just like any other skill, you can learn it.

This romantic notion of struggling writers/actors/directors is really a very silly one, as you can find a job in theatre that will fit any requirement you might have, and still be challenging, interesting and exciting. thats what makes is such a great industry to be in.And even if you can't get into theatre, any job you take counts as life experience and ispiration. Go for really silly ones, it'll look funnier in interviews if you get famous.

Your robot reminds me of you. You tell it to turn it stops. You tell it to stop it turns. You ask it to take out the garbage it watches reruns of Firefly.
http://www.myspace.com/seryndippyt

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 1:59 AM

SPACEANJL

Seryn - excuse me? John Cusack is VERY aesthetically pleasing.

Voice-wise - Alan Rickman. Wah!

Shoes - don't get it. I'm a boot girl. I own less pairs of shoes than my husband, and some of them are things like my Diablos (climbing shoes)

Lingerie - have trained the man that lace itches, black and red is tacky, but creamy silk will work.

Kids - gak. Not for any cashy money in the 'Verse. But I don't say never. (I have a cat - at least when he kicks off at two in the morning, I can chuck him outside. They have issues if you do that with sprogs.)

Jobs - So, where the hell is Joss? I want a screen-writers job. Or failing that, I'll arm-wrestle deCandido for the next novelization. (Or duel him - women's fencing team back in the day...) I used to try for the whole career thing. Burn out. Big time. So I took a job with way less pay and way, way less stress. I'm quite happy subsisting, because a two-year writers' drought has lifted.

Technology - stripped down my own computer to install new modem and memory. Husband is very technical, professionally, but I'm the one that reads the instructions for home installations.

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 2:59 AM

Morning, all!
Seems I didn't miss too much...
I don't have a shoe fetish when it comes to everyday shoes. I have two pairs of shoes; that's it. Now, period footwear...there is where the problem lays. I have probably six or seven different pairs of boots to go with the multitude of costumes I have. My favorite are a pair of mostly flat cavalier-style black leather boots that come up to mid-thigh on me. I think those are my wife's favorite pair, too.

Technological savvy...I started learning on computers back when the TRS80 came out, so I have sort of kept up with it. I am not an expert, but I know enough to keep myself out of trouble and ocassionally help others with their problems.

Alright, think I'm caught up, now.

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:13 AM

DAYVE

Good Morning All....
i'm just back from a couple weeks of R&R and thought i'd check in with what appears to be the most popular thread on the site....

I haven't been keeping up with all the imponderables very well, so i'll just start with the last few...

Shoes? that's an odd topic... but i do have more than i need... i was a runner - loved to run, until i developed the dreaded plantar fasciitis which slowed me down a lot - so i have a duffle bag full of runnning shoes that don't get the use they deserve.

technology is a good thing - i'm all for it.... but i do have a couple of old computers that would make excellent boat anchors....

lingerie - (the voice over of Homer Simpson inserted here - mmmm lingerie) - i mean what red blooded male doesn't appreciate the delicate undies of the fairer sex... And i realize that a lot of women tolerate the uncomfortableness of some of these things just to please their mate, lover, film director....etc... and to those women i just want to say Thank You.... we (i) really appreciate it..... (hope i don't come off sounding like a dirty old man... i'm not - but i believe sexy is just more than the act of sex and everything that leads up to it is [sometimes] the best part).....

and a question... do any of the couples out there ever take separate vacations... or weekend trips....?

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:23 AM

Morning, Dayve! Thank you for joining us!

To your question of separate vacations or weekend trips...sort of. A "vacation" to me is leaving the state for several days, so the few that the wife and I have taken have always been as a couple. Weekend trips are a bit different. She will spend the night with a friend of hers a few towns over, and I will ocassionally go to the home of my brother and his wife one state over. I have a steady, 8-5 5-day a week job, so I always know what my schedule is going to be. My wife does not. She almost always has to work on Saturdays, and only knows a week ahead of time what her schedule will be, so planning things is a bit hard at times. We make do when we can, and try to plan our vacation days together.
I am not sure I would really enjoy a vacation away from her. She is what makes getting away worth getting away...if that makes any sense?

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:33 AM

Impondreables - hi! Wow these threads are fun, but when RL gets nutty, I can't keep up with y'all!

Speaking of the cammando thing - I've been in a habit of walking the house in undies lately. It's a summer thing, and I live in the woods so why the heck not? Anyone else do this? It's extremely comfortable.

Shoes - I love sexy/funky/crazy shoes, but can't get over my love of comfort enough to buy them for myself. Also an issue that I'm tall and don't like towering over my date.

Speaking of which - I've actually been dating! Yes, online dating service, but I met a good one last weekend - he loves Firefly, and wants to make TV shows/movies! He lent me the Finding Serenity book. Good date there.

Technology - I've had the odd experience of being encouraged, all my life, to go into technology/science. Like, there's not enough women, so if we get one with some interest and talent grab her! I'm not comnplaining, but now that I work in science I'm not entirely sure it's what I want to do. Early mid-life crisis? Maybe.

Anyway, I'm glad to be back! I'll try to keep up - I've missed the imponderable entertainment in my day!

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I'm the president. I don't need to listen.

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:40 AM

Morning all...Tristan yes I understand my husband used to have one of those jobs and he still doesn't get a whole lot of time off so we have to plan our breaks very carefully....it kinda bites especially as I have summers off :)
So I have an imponderable...guys on/off switch. Example SO on computer all night playing world of warcraft. I'm doing my own thing and he gets off computer and comes in at 11 at night and wants to get it on right then ( took the no with usual grace and understanding) but flip side. I'm all smooth and done up from spa I come home take a bubble bath and get out and go in and put lotion on with my leg balanced up on his desk inches from him... I was really going for seductive and as far as his response I might have been the cat...so what gives? Do you people have some sort of on/off switch and if so where precisely is that located???

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:41 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

When I'm in my room I tend to strip down, yes. Don't really want everyone in the house to see me nekkid, though. When I have my own place, I'm sure to be in my skivies or less a lot of the time.

wait for bunk stampede...

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:42 AM

DEEPGIRL187

Sounds like a great date, Mal4Prez. Hope everything works out well (course, if he likes Firefly, that's already a good sign!).

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"I...won't be just a memory."

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:45 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Quote:
Originally posted by msg:
Morning all...Tristan yes I understand my husband used to have one of those jobs and he still doesn't get a whole lot of time off so we have to plan our breaks very carefully....it kinda bites especially as I have summers off :)
So I have an imponderable...guys on/off switch. Example SO on computer all night playing world of warcraft. I'm doing my own thing and he gets off computer and comes in at 11 at night and wants to get it on right then ( took the no with usual grace and understanding) but flip side. I'm all smooth and done up from spa I come home take a bubble bath and get out and go in and put lotion on with my leg balanced up on his desk inches from him... I was really going for seductive and as far as his response I might have been the cat...so what gives? Do you people have some sort of on/off switch and if so where precisely is that located???

I think it's between their belly and their knees...

Being serious, though, I've totally had that experience. There were times when I would prance around in front of Ex of Doom in a sheer robe and he wouldn't even look at me, and other times when I'd be wearing basic jeans and a t-shirt and he'd go "You're adorable. Let's go get naked." WTF?? I do not get that either.

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:45 AM

RUGBUG

Morning all!

CoPilot: Sleeping with a friend's ex is not something I would do...unless I thought I was going to be in a long-term relationship with the person. If it's just sex, nope. Chance for future happiness, yes. But I would also be ready to loose the friend.

Seperate vacations? Haven't really had the opportunity to see if that's a go or not. I haven't taken a vacation in 7 years. (Sounds pathetic, but it served me well when I was out of work for four months with my broken arm.) In theory I would say a resounding 'probably not' but I can come up with many scenarios where I would have no problem with it. Sports specific trips being one (i.e. fishing with the buddies, etc).

Weekend trips? Certainly.

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:46 AM

PR - I love the newer picture of you on the other thread! You look very different without all the red sparkleys, but both are good in their own way!

Tristan - great second picture of you too!

DeepGirl - yes, good date! He lives like 2 hours away though. Hard to find local men in rural Vermont!

EDIT: Co-pilot - I forgot to say - I got 'permission' to sleep with a friend's ex, and even though I didn't (we just cuddled and slept), she was upset and it took a long time to get past it. She thought I was lying that I didn't have sex with him!

Tangled relationship... so tricky...

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:50 AM

Mal4Prez you are so cute!!!! Actually you are all really good looking. If only I could figure out how to get my pic from the blue sun room to the posting thread...but oh well...apparently if you wanna see it you can just click my profile and click my blue sun item and see it:)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:56 AM

Morning, MSG!
On/off switch. Yes, we have one. It doesn't get used as much as the females' version does, but we do have one. As to where it's located...I would say mine is in the "creative" section of my brain. I like working with my hands, be it on steel, cloth...artistic, functional stuff. When I am working on a project, or even seriously thinking about one, I am somewhat unreachable. Not saying I would ignore a smooth, lotioned leg inches away from me, but I would not give the expected reaction. On the flip side, I can go from zero to "right here, right now" in no time at all. There are certain things my wife can do...the way she moves, a certain look, a delicate kiss...that are instant on's, and no matter what I am doing, it is quickly abandoned.
To perhaps explain a little better, I would have to say that despite public opinion, males do not think about sex all the time. We do have other things on our minds, believe it or not!

Most women seem "disgusted" that we base males only think about sex all the time and are ready to go at the drop of a wink. Yet these same females are somewhat taken aback when we do not respond as predicted. Not levelling anything at you, MSG, just dragging another large impobderable into our midst so we may examine and discuss. Thank you for opening this door!

Anyone else in here have anything to add to this? Any males out there that have turned down sex to do something else, even when it was offered? And how do the females respond to this?

Wow, this was a good one, and promises lots of discussion! Thank you again, MSG!

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:56 AM

DAYVE

mal4prez.... yeah, i'm on board with the whole walking around in the buff thing.... i also live in a rural location and can even walk around outside with nothing on but my reefs.... i've never actually considered visiting a nudist camp (although there is one located fairly close)... but i can see the attraction. And i'm talking comfort here.... i haven't completely let myself "go" and i'm in pretty good shape so my wife doesn't complain much - in any case summer in texas almost demands wearing as little as possible - harmful effects of the sun not withstanding - i stay pretty brown till the winter winds blow in....

the reason i asked about separate vacations is that my wife is a teacher - and has the summer to do just about anything she wants to do - i've tried to get her to take a trip to England/Scotland/Ireland (places she's wanted to go) or anywhere in Europe with her niece, who is out of university for the summer also, but she balks at the suggestion - i think it's perfectly alright for her to do it, but she keeps putting it off. Am i wrong?
We do take a couple weeks together each year, but i think she could enjoy a trip without me....

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 4:56 AM

MSG: I finally saw your picture - you are so lovely, and ready made to do an Inara impression! Dolled with a veil and lots of silk - I can totally see it.

Have you tried photobucket? I got an account there just for posting pictures here, and it was surprisingly easy.

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 5:02 AM

Dayve- yeah I went to France without my husband ( with mom and sis) I did enjoy it, but I have to say not as much as I would have with my husband...Since you do take time as well, why not suggest she go for the first week with the niece and then you will join up with them for the next week:)
Tristan- yeah I hear you:) My main confusion is the spend 5 hours playing games not interacting with me then suddenly want to hook up...throws me off as I need interaction before I am in the mood:)As corrolary also confused by the SO turned on when I think I look less than great.
Mal4Prez- thanks and right back at ya!

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 5:04 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Dayve:
mal4prez.... yeah, i'm on board with the whole walking around in the buff thing.... i also live in a rural location and can even walk around outside with nothing on but my reefs....

I'm jealous! I have a large garden in my front yard and work in it a lot, and it would be so comfortable to work topless. But... I live on a fairly major highway. Just to clarify - inside the house, not visible to highway. Front yard - nudity may cause accidents.

Quote:
i've never actually considered visiting a nudist camp (although there is one located fairly close)... but i can see the attraction. And i'm talking comfort here....

I've vacationed at a nude resort. First time - very fun, nudity was all about comfort. Second time - there was a big group of swingers there, and some Playboy slut contest going on (I kid you not) It was seedy and icky. Didn't like that so much.

Re the on/off button: I've been out of the game for so long, I have nothing to say! But, as the dating has begun, I will read all your posts with avid interest...

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 5:04 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Thanks! I do look different in black and without the silly headband.
Ms G, I might have posted your pic on that thread from my own PhotoBucket account...

I've thought about doing the nudist thing. I've wondered about the protocol.

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 5:08 AM

Thanks tons Phoenix:)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 5:13 AM

MSG, here's a secret. Now, I may be dragged away by the rest of the males and never heard from again for divulging it, but I must!

No matter how you look, your SO thinks you are beautiful. Yes, we love it when you dress to the nines and turn every head in the room, but in our eyes, you are always beautiful. You could wear a gunny sack and use mud as make-up. You could wear a shapeless sweatshirt over jogging pants. We understand that your mood depends on self-awareness most of the time (if you think you look good, you feel good), so we seldom act on our impulses, but we have a leveled thought...we think you look beautiful no matter what.

If I do not post on this thread anymore, someone please come looking for me.

Mal4Prez, thank you for the compliment. I love the water shot of you! You're pretty...pretty!

PR, it's not always between our bellies and our knees...sometimes it's between our ears, just like y'all's.

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Thursday, July 6, 2006 5:17 AM