Male and Female Imponderables--Why, Then The World's My Oyster by Tristan

I'm happy today!

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/llama.php
-try it out, I dare you

98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature

I'm so into Firefly, my butt glows in the dark.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 3:26 AM

Your happiness is a good thing, right? Why are you happy?

______________________________________

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Friday, July 14, 2006 3:28 AM

'cause Mal just said "The explosive diarrhea of an elephant" in chinese and my DVD's aren't playing

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Friday, July 14, 2006 3:28 AM

MSG

Morning all and sundry:) Wow a whole new thread:)
I have to go to a meeting at my new school, but I should be back in about 2 hours or so:) Hey just as a ponder...Why do guys have such a hard time admitting they might be wrong?? ( not trying to be mean to you guys, but I've just had a lot more experience with guys refusing to admit this than women and I wondered if it was something they were raised to do or if it was some sort of ingrained thing or what) HUGS to all

see you shortly

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Friday, July 14, 2006 3:33 AM

I have never had a problem admitting I was wrong when I was presented with some sort of proof to that effect

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Friday, July 14, 2006 3:35 AM

PENGUIN

I don't know...I've never been wrong before!

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Friday, July 14, 2006 3:50 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Because it's not fun to feel you're wrong?

I've been working on it in recent years. I used to be very bad at admitting I was wrong. Except when I can admit it to myself life goes more smooth, so I try to.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 3:59 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Guywhowantsafireflyofhisown:
I have never had a problem admitting I was wrong when I was presented with some sort of proof to that effect

Ditto.

Now, using the word "proof" might make it sound like the bar is set pretty high, but that's not true in the majority of cases. If I can be shown I'm wrong, by whatever sufficient means, I'll gladly admit it. Why? (One might ask.) Because there's always gain, never loss, in learning the truth.

What I won't abide, though, is the demand that I accept something that's wrong, because it might hurt someone's feelings if I don't. I'll do my best to be courteous about it (though that goes away if courtesy is not offered in return), but I refuse to deny what's true.

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:00 AM

exactly

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:01 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Piz, remind me why you're single?

Oh, right, most people are fools who don't like honesty.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:02 AM

KENOBIUS

Good morning, ladies and gents.

I don't mind admitting it if the other person doesn't blow it out of the water and gloats or does the "We should have listened to me!" type stuff. If the right-all-along person is cool about it, I'm cool with it. We're human beings after all.

EDIT: You don't know how giddy to I am right now, being able to turn on the television and have Firefly on, ALL DAY!

http://tinyurl.com/ekv6z

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:10 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
Piz, remind me why you're single?

Oh, right, most people are fools who don't like honesty.

This is one of those interesting times when text in an internet discussion group is insufficient to get the whole meaning of something. I can't tell whether that's a compliment or an insult (or neither).

Giving the benefit of the doubt

, sometimes they're being foolish (note the subtle change from "what they are" to "how they're acting"

), but there are two other common cases. Sometimes they're trying to pull something over on you. Other times they honestly don't comprehend. I always check for scams first (self preservation), then mistakes (benefit of the doubt, though a different kind than mentioned above), before I conclude foolishness (don't bother any further).

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:19 AM

RUGBUG

Copied from last thread so I could say: ME, TOO!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Tristan:
Yet, as the fates would have it, I am in insurance. The last place anyone I know would have pictured me.

I work in insurance and for the most part it is a job that allows me to live in the town I want and to own my horse.

Seryn: I had to go through a similiar situation when choosing what I want. I got my degree, but knew I didn't want to work in that field. The only "job" I would really want to do on a daily basis involves horses and those jobs are notoriously low paying with long, hard hours. Even if you get a decent job in the industry, it is then very difficult to afford a horse of your own, much less show it. So, I opted for a job that could support my habit. It's not always the easiest thing to get my booty in to work everyday, but I manage. And everytime I go see my horse, I am reminded why I am doing this.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:22 AM

Guy, I am going to assume you found the site that has the sound files...if not, are you hearing things in your head?

MSG, morning!
I will admit if I have done something wrong...as long as I am not goaded about it. The whole "You were wrong, admit it!" gets under our skin and causing us to shut down any proper response we were going to put forth. Not a proud thing, but it is there. I agree with the others; I will freely admit it if there is proof.

Morning, Penguin, PR, Piz, Kenobius!

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:24 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Tristan:
Guy, I am going to assume you found the site that has the sound files...if not, are you hearing things in your head?

none of the above I was watchin' "Our Mrs. Reynolds" on sci-fi

did you forget that was today?

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:25 AM

PENGUIN

Mornin'!

"The hero of Canton, the man they call Jayne..."

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:27 AM

this thread moves fast

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:29 AM

MAVOURNEEN

Quote:
Originally posted by Tristan:
The whole "You were wrong, admit it!" gets under our skin and causing us to shut down any proper response we were going to put forth. Not a proud thing, but it is there. I agree with the others; I will freely admit it if there is proof.

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Morning, All!

Just waiting for photobucket to come up so I could show off my new acquisitions...

Tristan's comment sounds like it could have come from my husband's own pie hole..."gets under the skin, shuts down any response" sums it up, perfectly. Most men will admit when they are wrong, but I've noted after 14 years with Mr. Mav that he never wants it rubbed in his face, before or after acknowledging the "error." But, he's a good egg, and cuts the lawn well, so I keep him around.

"Have you ever been with a Warrior Woman?"

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:41 AM

Guy, I do not have cable, but I do remember hearing about the marathon. Oops.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:53 AM

ahhh

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:53 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Tristan:
The whole "You were wrong, admit it!" gets under our skin

(in best Our-Mrs-Reynolds Wash voice:) Yeah yeah!

I spent most of my life dealing with two of the queens of lording mistakes over others: my ex and my mom. Boo hway-hun duh puo-foo, they'd gleefully pounce on every little mistake, no matter how small. These days, I'm happy to say, I no longer have to deal with the former, and I no longer allow the latter to get away with it.

Quote:
Originally posted by Tristan:
Morning, Penguin, PR, Piz, Kenobius!

How do?

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:54 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by msg:
Why do guys have such a hard time admitting they might be wrong??

admit we're wrong... what? and throw the entire universe as we know it into complete and utter chaos????

(i don't need no stinking map....let's just drive around until something looks familiar....)

endeavor to persevere...

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:55 AM

ONEMANSHORT

I don't want to sound sexist or really mean here, but I think it's just their incredibly large egos getting in the way of them admitting they're wrong most of the time. The boys I know will not admit they're wrong until they have literally physical proof, and I think this is just ridiculous. If you just tell them how they are wrong they'll say no. For example, I was working in a group in Global, and we came to some question and the boy in our group said one answer and the girls told him that it was wrong, and what really happened, etc... He wouldn't believe me so we had to look it up in the textbook

Because he's normally good in global he let his inflated ego get in the way of seeing the truth. I'll admit not every single guy is like this, and maybe, being in high school, the guys haven't quite matured yet, but it does really gets on my nerves. This is just from my experience with them though.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 4:59 AM

Morning yall.

MSG- I've got no problem admitting I'm wrong when I am actually wrong. I just refuse to say I'm wrong when I'm not.

Lets reverse this a bit too. My experience has always been with women who refuse to admit they're wrong even when presented with evidence to the contrary. (my mother is especially good at this) So, why is it you ladies sometimes have this difficulty?

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:02 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Mircea:
women who refuse to admit they're wrong even when presented with evidence to the contrary.

red is blue.... up is down.... night is day.... naw, never happens...

you're a brave man Mircea

endeavor to persevere...

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:05 AM

Wow, it's picking up in here!
Morning, Mavourneen, Dayve, OneManShort!
Mircea, I think you are new here...welcome! Glad you can join us.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:05 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Mircea:

Lets reverse this a bit too. My experience has always been with women who refuse to admit they're wrong even when presented with evidence to the contrary. (my mother is especially good at this) So, why is it you ladies sometimes have this difficulty?

my mom did that once

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:05 AM

GED

If I'm wrong about something, I have no qualms admitting it. But if we're debating something, I will argue the point as best I can.

__________________________________________________
This above all, — to thine ownself be true.
http://www.myspace.com/artv

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:08 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Dayve:
[you're a brave man Mircea

endeavor to persevere...

Or incrediably foolhardy.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:10 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Mircea:
My experience has always been with women who refuse to admit they're wrong even when presented with evidence to the contrary. (my mother is especially good at this)

Not that I'm agreeing that women are exclusively (or even primarily) guilty of this sort of thing, but from ex and mom I used to get a lot of what amounted to "Well, sure, you're right, but you still have to grant that I have a point. If you don't then you're just being a S.O.B., therefore the facts don't matter and you lose, you prick."

Funny how it never was a matter of winning or losing to me, just one of finding the truth, whatever side it came down on. But to them, winning was everything and any flimsy excuse they could use to "win" by making me feel bad they would cling to as if their lives depended on it.

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:10 AM

very brave

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:10 AM

let me ask this, (before being handed my hat)..... what are women thinking when they ask for a man's opinion on a new dress or article of apparel..? "Does make me look fat...?'

how can we honestly answer that without getting in trouble...?

(i'll take a lack of response to mean that this has been discussed already...)

endeavor to persevere...

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:11 AM

I've often wondered that myself

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:11 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Tristan:
Wow, it's picking up in here!
Morning, Mavourneen, Dayve, OneManShort!
Mircea, I think you are new here...welcome! Glad you can join us.

______________________________________

Sorta new I guess. I was on as JubilantLurker before the blackhole swallowed us and killed me. I've been lurking for a year or more.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:13 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Dayve:
red is blue.... up is down.... night is day.... naw, never happens...

A certain ex of mine could look you right in the eye and say "The sky is blue," then immediately continue with "The sky is not blue," and both would be lies. I don't think truth ever entered into any utterance she ever made (or will make). Wish I'd found that out sooner than I did, but life goes on.

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:14 AM

and one for the men.... just wondering if you have your own 'fortress of solitude'..... a place to get away from things you don't want to deal with at the moment - a room, workshop, treehouse?

we need these things, no?

endeavor to persevere...

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:16 AM

Dayve- I'm pretty sure there is no right answer on that one except maybe to say something like. 'Baby, you're just beautiful in anything you wear."

Course, you might wanna take cover just in case I'm wrong on that last bit

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:16 AM

GED

Quote:
Originally posted by Dayve:
and one for the men.... just wondering if you have your own 'fortress of solitude'..... a place to get away from things you don't want to deal with at the moment - a room, workshop, treehouse?

World of Warcraft

__________________________________________________
This above all, — to thine ownself be true.
http://www.myspace.com/artv

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:17 AM

RUGBUG

I don't have a problem admitting I'm wrong. But like the guys, if you shove it in my face, I will shove back and not give you the satisfaction of the admission. I just clam up....

On matters of opinion, I'm pretty good at validating someone else's stance without compromising my own. And if someone's argument is good enough, I have no problem telling them so and even adopting it as my own.

But let's just say if I KNOW I am right, you're gonna have a real hard time getting me to back down.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:20 AM

MAVOURNEEN

Quote:
Originally posted by Dayve:
let me ask this, (before being handed my hat)..... what are women thinking when they ask for a man's opinion on a new dress or article of apparel..? "Does make me look fat...?'

how can we honestly answer that without getting in trouble...?

(i'll take a lack of response to mean that this has been discussed already...)

endeavor to persevere...

*Mav comes over and puts her arm around Dayve's shoulder*

Dayve...let me let you in on a little chick truthism...We don't dress for you. We dress for other women. We want OTHER women to admire our clothes, etc. And in "most" cases, if a woman asks you if something makes her look fat, she wants to make sure other women don't think she is fat.
There is no one good answer to this question, however. Your best bet is to mumble something about yardwork or transmission fluid and leave the area immediately.

Of course...there are other schools of thought...

"Have you ever been with a Warrior Woman?"

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:24 AM

Nope, no fortress of solitude. That would imply I knew someone who felt I was deserving of privacy

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:25 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Dayve:
let me ask this, (before being handed my hat)..... what are women thinking when they ask for a man's opinion on a new dress or article of apparel..? "Does make me look fat...?'

how can we honestly answer that without getting in trouble...?

*takes a big, slow step away from Dayve...*

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:28 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Quote:
Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
Because it's not fun to feel you're wrong?

Funny how I can have already answered the question from a female point, and no one acknowledges it.
Perhaps I should expand? I have never liked being wrong, and, as the men have stated, when someone tries to "make" me admit it, it feels like they're trying to grind me under their heel, so I feel even worse about being wrong and don't want to admit it because that would make it solid.
As for the "does this make me look fat?" thing, I can't say I ever ask that. Sometimes I'll ask the simpler "how does this look?"
And, unlike most of my species, I am dressing for you, not other women.
Can I say again that the fortress of solitude can be easily overused? Treat such things with caution.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:29 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Mircea:
Nope, no fortress of solitude. That would imply I knew someone who felt I was deserving of privacy

ROTFLMAO!

You wouldn't happen to be me, would you?

I tried several times to have space of my own, but the ex would just take it over every time. Once I set up a tiny (like 3 ft x 3 ft) meditation space - the very next day it was covered in dirty laundry. Wasn't even near the laundry room.

Her motto seemed to be "What's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine."

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:31 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER

Morning to all you wonderful folk.

Gotta prepare for a parade with my kids from work so I'll be in and out.

Every person should have a fortress of solitude, even if only in their heads.

As for the women in clothes thing...
I learned from my sisters dad that it is better to work smarter, not harder.
Guys, brush up on the fashion. Think about colors and patters and materials. What do you like seeing? I found it much easier to help a woman dress than to get the off hand questions when its time to go.
That, and there is more of a chance the clothes will come off easier when she's happy how she looks throughout the day/night.

Just one womanizers opinion.

"I shot the sheriff

But I did not shoot the deputy"

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:31 AM

RUGBUG

Yep, we mostly dress for other women. If the men like it, that's just bonus.

The problem men run into is that if you say it looks nice and accidently compliment an area of our body we HATE ("It makes your legs look really sexy"), we are NEVER going to believe you and will even accuse you of lying just to make us feel better. Best bet is to figure out what parts of her body your SO likes best and creatively say the article of clothing makes that look terrific.

And alternatively, if it really does make us look fat, I know I would rather hear it. But in a kind way. Sadly, most men lack the fashion knowledge to say something looks bad without implying that it looks bad because of our bodies. "The boxy cut and stiff fabric does nothing to show off your wonderful figure" isn't usually part of a man's vocab.

Edited b/c NV was on the same wavelength. Awesome!

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:34 AM

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Quote:
Originally posted by Piz:
Quote:
Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
Piz, remind me why you're single?

Oh, right, most people are fools who don't like honesty.
This is one of those interesting times when text in an internet discussion group is insufficient to get the whole meaning of something. I can't tell whether that's a compliment or an insult (or neither).

I've always considered myself to be well-spoken and also a good writer. Have I been so unclear?
Okay. "Remind me why you're single" is in fact meant to be a compliment in most cases. At times it is used sarcastically, but I try to avoid sarcasm online as it's easily misread; no tone of voice to go with it.
Thank you, then, for giving me the benifit of the doubt. That was the correct way to interpret it.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:35 AM

SPACEANJL

I come from a family where whole meals were thrown into chaos by the need to hunt for textbooks to verify a fact. (ie win an argument.) Both my father and I have minds like steel traps - we retain everything, especially trivia. Makes us great at pub quizzes, and hell for other people. Neither of us do the "wr" word well - we are occassionally not as right as we would like to be, but that is as far as it goes. Both my brother and my mother are amiable souls, who do not understand the need to rush away from the table and fire up the internet bold right now to sort out a quibble on the exact film quote from some obscure sci-fi thing, but to us, it's important.

We're sad that way.

Fortress of solitude - the husband is desperate for a shed to keep his seven plus boxes of bike bits in. He wants to build his own car, too.

I'm a proper girl - my own time is a hot bubble bath, a glass of something cold (and maybe bubbly) and a book.

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Friday, July 14, 2006 5:35 AM