GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Male and Female Imponderables - Not for the Faint of Heart

POSTED BY: PHOENIXROSE
UPDATED: Monday, July 17, 2006 11:53
SHORT URL:
VIEWED: 14198
PAGE 2 of 4

Sunday, July 16, 2006 9:41 PM

EMMARIGBY


There's no point in regreting anything. I just view it all as a learning experience. And if you learn that you shouldn't do that (or them) again then, hey, at least you've learnt something! The only regrets I've had is about things (and people) I've not done!

By the way, have I mentioned yet this morning I'm going to see the lemurs? Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Gosh!


___________________
Hissssssssss!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Sunday, July 16, 2006 9:46 PM

DANCINGNEKO


Hi again.

Hickies: I work with teens, so usually seeing a hickey at work means I’m dealing with a teen that’s too near the borderline for sexually active than they are ready to be (translation: I work at a school). Adults at my workplace are “role models” for the students so having a hickey in a visible location is seen as “unprofessional” and a “no-no.”

Spots that drive me crazy: The one that comes to mind is the inside of my wrists. Gently scraping teeth *just so* sends all kinds of shivers.

Female sex drive: I have no idea…I place it under “he’s gotta make something up so he can feel secure” heading.

Off limits: For me, ex’s of friends, sibling’s ex’s, siblings of friends, co-workers. Have a relationship in a friendly manner – "maybe" to "yes", but date? Nope, don’t need the drama.

Casual sex: If it works for you, (i.e. you can have sex with someone just for sex and retain the relationship you had before) fine. It doesn’t work for me.

PhoenixRose: That's so cute! (and I don't have to translate! *double whee*!) Once I figure out how to add it to my signature, that's where she's going *cough* Thank you.

[Edit: Had to clean up a sentence. *bah*]
[Edit II: Found a spilling error. Good thing I don't teach English.]

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Sunday, July 16, 2006 11:38 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by Dancingneko:
PhoenixRose: That's so cute! (and I don't have to translate! *double whee*!) Once I figure out how to add it to my signature, that's where she's going


Had a feeling you might like that. For image posting tips, go here: http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=5&t=22105

**********************************

**********************************

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 12:18 AM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Quote:

Originally posted by Penguin:

*considers becoming a high priest...*



Oooooh Penguin! Now I'm blushing agin!! AND you've made my day!!

PR - I think we're very alike too! I often find something I really enjoy in your posts! Thanks!

Also Tristan - this is my first ever foray into the imponderables threads! If I'd known it would be so much fun I'd have done it ages ago!! Thank you all for the warm welcome! (especially Penguin!!)

Lovin' you - Magdalena x x

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 12:43 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Magdalena
Yes, much fun usually. We must do this more often

So here's one: What is everyone's personal definition of "high maintenance"?
I've always thought of it as someone who was kinda pricey; expected to have a lot of money spent on them. But I think almost everyone has a slightly different view on it.

**********************************

**********************************

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 1:07 AM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Emma! Hey those Lemurs - they like to "move it, move it!!" Congratulations on all those plans - I'm so happy for you and your sister! BTW my nieces/nephews call me Auntie Em/Emmi!!

Seryn - dated a close friends brother for 7 months and when he decided it was over he burned me good and proper!! It was very disrupting to my entire social life and afterwards my friend confessed that she was never really comfortable with me dating him!! Also, yes, my only regrets are missed opportunities (usually because of lacking in self confidence...or was that you who mentioned this Emma??)

Shamrock - I wouldn't give a hickie if I wasn't sure that the recipient was OK with it so I would take it amiss if they gave me one without some prior undertanding. I guess I'm understanding the 'disrespectful' aspect, but not that I have anything personally against them as a rule.

Whitefall - sex is all over the media here (Australia) too - to the point that some people think you're a freak if you tell them you're celebate and some of my close friends don't mention they're virgins for the same reason. I'm just enjoying not putting that expectation on myself or anyone else at the moment. (& my fantasy life is thriving!)

SmartBDB - Yay! You are so right - your first time only happens once and you never forget it! There's nothing dumb about you Honey!

CoPilot - I wouldn't know, numbers wise, but I say "here here" to everything Phoenix Rose says. I did once have a one-night-stand and I now know that casual sex is definitely not satisfying for me - I need to connect on an emotional/trust level to really enjoy it ... and, yes, that means climaxing! I have so quickly fallen in love with all the wonderful people in this here 'Verse (we're all kindred spirits of a kind, after all!) that I already care about you as a friend, and taking control of your choices means making sure they work for you and nobody else! I guess I'm saying there's no judgment if you genuinely get the most you can through casual sex, but please take the time to find out if it is the most!

DancingNeko - also "here here" to all of it!!

Wow - I do love this part of the 'Verse - I love the connections - thanks for takin' the time to care for and explore each others positions... er I mean - points of view! You all ROCK!!

Lovin' you - Magdalena x x

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 1:48 AM

PIZ


Quote:

Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
What is everyone's personal definition of "high maintenance"?
I've always thought of it as someone who was kinda pricey; expected to have a lot of money
spent on them. But I think almost everyone has a slightly different view on it.


I never thought that it was about money, although money is a tool that high-maintenance people
often use to get what they're after. What they're after is attention. They want the relationship to
center on them and them alone, at all times and in all respects. If it doesn't then they think
something's wrong, that the other person in the relationship isn't keeping up their end.

Could be they're trying to fill some void inside them, but I've never stayed with a
high-maintenance woman long enough to figure it out. It's not worth figuring out - if you're with
someone like that, just get out.

***NOTE: I say "high-maintenance woman," but that's only because I'm not at all sly so I've
never had a romantic relationship with a man. Men can be high-maintenance too, no doubt.

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 1:52 AM

SPACEANJL


PR, if my body is a temple, then it is one to the strange and squid-like gods of the elder times

Definitely neck and shoulders, and that bit of the wrist...Women have a lot more sensitive spots than men, aren't we lucky?

Emma - go lemurs! You gonna eat one of them darlin' li'l suckers? (I remember the bambi thing on a previous post - you can go for the 'cutest meal' award)

I'm a fan of secret hickies myself.

High maintenance -what Piz said. It's all about the ego, baby.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 2:01 AM

PIZ


Quote:

Originally posted by SpaceAnJL:
High maintenance -what Piz said. It's all about the ego, baby.


Just one note on this: It's not quite all about the ego. Healthy egos don't seek what the
high-maintenance person is after. There's a right and a wrong way to "look out for #1."

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 2:10 AM

SPACEANJL


Never said it was a healthy thing. Some people have an ego that seems to be a separate entity. I posted something a while ago about some of the folk I get in at work, who make a real deal about how their food is prepped, etc. (NOT genuine allergies or intolerance, just fussy.) That's high maintenance.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 2:22 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by SpaceAnJL:
If my body is a temple, then it is one to the strange and squid-like gods of the elder times


You mean like Davey Jones?

**********************************

**********************************

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 2:27 AM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Quote:

Originally posted by PhoenixRose:

So here's one: What is everyone's personal definition of "high maintenance"?
I've always thought of it as someone who was kinda pricey; expected to have a lot of money spent on them. But I think almost everyone has a slightly different view on it.



Mwaah! Phoenix rose!!

I think of 'high maintenance' as someone who demands more than they give. You end up supressing some of yourself in the relationship in order to 'keep the other person happy' so to speak. You are constantly being careful to say the right things - do the right things - call at the right time - care for their feelings and insecurities to the point that you are lost in putting the other one first! Usually they are the ones who vanish at the first hint that you might actually need a little real support from them too!! After years of reasoning my way through these relationships (my turn will come - it never does!: I'm always there for you so you'll be there for me - they never are!!!) I identify them for what they are and avoid them like the plague - no matter how popular the friend is, or how sexy 'he' might be (or how jealous everyone is of your 'relationship' with him!!)

Phew - I need to lie down!! - Magdalena x x

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 2:28 AM

PIZ


Quote:

Originally posted by SpaceAnJL:
Never said it was a healthy thing. Some people have an ego that seems to be
a separate entity.

True. It's just that so many people think that "ego" is a bad word, that having an ego at all makes one a
self-centered prick. I only wanted to make the point that that's not the case.

Quote:

Originally posted by SpaceAnJL:
I posted something a while ago about some of the folk I get in at work, who make a
real deal about how their food is prepped, etc. (NOT genuine allergies or intolerance,
just fussy.) That's high maintenance.

Absolutely.

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 2:29 AM

SPACEANJL


More H P Lovecraft...still haven't seen POTC II. Waah!


Imponderable - matters of taste, again. Food, drink, music, books - all seem to have a gender bias. I like graphic novels, but this doesn't seem to be acceptable in a...woman of mature years. (I'm the same age as Mal - it isn't a bad thing.) Pints versus half-pints, or even beer versus alcopops? Has anyone else ever had the 'you shouldn't be (whatever) because you're a (insert gender here)'?


NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 2:37 AM

TRISTAN


Morning, all!
'Tis the dreaded Monday...hope everyone had a good weekend!

Welcome to the new posters! Glad you could join us.

Not sure there was too much posted I didn't answer...I'll get some coffee and re-read the thread to be sure.

See y'all in a bit!

______________________________________

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 2:42 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Yeah, I knew who you were talking about, I was just almost weirded out by how much Davey Jones resembled Cthulu.
Anyway, so, I asked about 'high maintenance' because I like a lot of attention; cuddling and petting and hand-holding, usually. And regular aknowlegments of my existance when I go somewhere with someone. I also give a lot of attention, though, have often felt that I might give too much of myself at times. I guess I just want the same kind of attention I give. I'm pretty sure that's how it is, anyway. I do get a little insecure if I'm not getting enough attention. For a long time Ex of Doom would call me on a regular basis, miss me, and be decently affectionate when he saw me. When that stopped is when we really started having problems. I tried to work through them and he didn't. He also said he felt "smothered" a few times throughout our relationship.
I'll stop babbling now.

Told I shouldn't be something because? Yeah, I've had a few people tell me I shouldn't be sober because I'm Irish. Can't think of anything where someone said I shouldn't be a certain way because I'm female, though.

**********************************

**********************************

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 2:42 AM

PIZ


Quote:

Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
You mean like Davey Jones?

Hey! As a closet Monkees fan, I have to take umbrage at that remark.

OK, I've taken the umbrage.

*gives it back...* Put that in the fridge where it belongs.



--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 2:53 AM

TRISTAN


Coffee good.

SpaceAnJL, forgive my rudeness; I did not answer your query.
Yes, I have been told I shouldn't sew, cook, clean, and have a good eye for design (fashion and home) because I am a male. My response is "pah!"

Monkees...I was lucky enough to see their 1986 tour with The Grass Roots and a few other bands, but minus Mikey Dolenz. Much fun!

______________________________________

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 3:01 AM

PIZ


Quote:

Originally posted by PhoenixRose:

Anyway, so, I asked about 'high maintenance' because I like a lot of attention;
cuddling and petting and hand-holding, usually. And regular aknowlegments of my
existance when I go somewhere with someone. I also give a lot of attention, though,
have often felt that I might give too much of myself at times. I guess I just want
the same kind of attention I give. I'm pretty sure that's how it is, anyway. I do
get a little insecure if I'm not getting enough attention. For a long time Ex of Doom
would call me on a regular basis, miss me, and be decently affectionate when he saw me.
When that stopped is when we really started having problems. I tried to work
through them and he didn't. He also said he felt "smothered" a few times throughout
our relationship.

"Maintenance" is relative. What's too much for one could be just right for someone else. What
you describe doesn't of necessity make you high maintenance, just uncomfortable for
someone who doesn't match your level of attention giving/getting. It sounds within the range of
"normal" to me.

That said, I personally am uncomfortable with a lot of that sort of attention in either
direction. I'll call "needy" and "smothered" at what some would consider pretty low levels,
preferring subtle to overt, and private to public.

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 3:04 AM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Quote:

Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
Told I shouldn't be something because? Yeah, I've had a few people tell me I shouldn't be sober because I'm Irish. Can't think of anything where someone said I shouldn't be a certain way because I'm female, though.



Hey - I've been told that I'm a freak coz I drink Vodka neat (no ice, nothin') and that I should be drunk ... just because I can hold my drinks! - I am usually told this by some guy who is pissed (yeah - that means something different in Australia too, your version of 'pissed' is 'pissed off' over here) on beer and slurring their words and breathing beer breath on me!

I'm goin' to my bunk now 'coz I gotta get up in the mornin'! Night y'all! Lovin' You! - Magdalena x x x

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 3:06 AM

PIZ


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:
Monkees...I was lucky enough to see their 1986 tour with The Grass Roots and a few
other bands, but minus Mikey Dolenz. Much fun!

I saw them on the same tour! But it was Mike Nesmith who wasn't with them at the show I saw - I thought Mickey was along for the whole thing. They had just released an album with Davy, Peter, and Mickey, but no Mike, and those three were doing the tour. Mike did take the stage with them for one or two shows (in L.A., I think), but that was all.

OK, TMI about my Monkees fan status...

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 3:07 AM

MAL4PREZ


Quote:

Originally posted by SpaceAnJL:
Has anyone else ever had the 'you shouldn't be (whatever) because you're a (insert gender here)'?



I have the perfect one!

I used to play pick-up hockey at this scanky old rink in Boston. I was the only woman, so all the guys changed in the locker room and I put on my gear in the rink. (No actual nudity was involved ) So, a group of ice dancers practiced before we got the ice, and one time this little old lady skated over to where I was sitting. She had blue eye makeup, a sparkley pink sweater, and those shiny stretchy fabric boot things over her skates. (I'm not making this up) and she said - "A nice girl like you ought to be ice dancing."

Several years later, while drinking beer in the locker room with the guys (after skating), the zamboni guy came in to grab a brew and then threw a fit, saying I couldn't be in there because I might get raped. I'd been skating with these guys for 6 years, and it was completely awful that he said that. They stood up for me, thank goodness!

Oh - and it's good to be back! I may never catch up on all imponderables I missed.

Except that - I've never had a hickey, and I'd be wicked uncomfortable if I had an obvious one. And I hate turtlenecks. Hidden hickey would be just fine.


-----------------------------------------------
I'm the president. I don't need to listen.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 3:16 AM

TRISTAN


Piz, thank you for clearing that up...I always got those two mixed up...it was Nesmith that wasn't there. Hey, in my defense, it was 20 years ago...but, no, that won't work. You remembered it correctly...I'll have to come up with another excuse.



______________________________________

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 3:55 AM

DAYVE


Good Morning All,

Noticed some new names (to me) while scrolling down this long list of imponderables - Welcome - and by way of introduction, Hi, I'm Dayve and i'm an imponderableaholic.... but in a good way...

topics...

hickies... whatever happens in the throes of passion is usually unavoidable in my view.... but in a good way....

casual sex... i'll admit to a few one night stands - it happens - practice safe sex and enjoy... i have no qualms about it...

gender specific taboos - this leads to a subject that i have long wondered about, that is, human conditioning - i have come to believe that humans are subject to their environment - we learn early on what constitutes acceptable behavior - we're 'conditioned' by parents, teachers, peers and other outside influences to behave in a manner acceptable to society - i have 'conditioned' myself to challange this theroy - and have, on ocasion, rebeled against those who represent established authority figures and have sought to live life on my own terms.... but in a good way....





"endeavor to persevere..." Chief Dan George as Lone Waite, Indian chief

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 3:58 AM

PIZ


Quote:

Originally posted by Dayve:

gender specific taboos - this leads to a subject that i have long wondered about,
that is, human conditioning - i have come to believe that humans are subject
to their environment - we learn early on what constitutes acceptable behavior -
we're 'conditioned' by parents, teachers, peers and other outside influences to
behave in a manner acceptable to society - i have 'conditioned' myself to
challange this theroy - and have, on ocasion, rebeled against those who represent
established authority figures and have sought to live life on my own terms.... but
in a good way....

What about volition? Isn't that what is meant by conditioning oneself?

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 4:03 AM

PENGUIN


Quote:

Originally posted by mal4prez:
So, a group of ice dancers practiced before we got the ice, and one time this little old lady skated over to where I was sitting. She had blue eye makeup, a sparkley pink sweater, and those shiny stretchy fabric boot things over her skates. (I'm not making this up) and she said - "A nice girl like you ought to be ice dancing.



You should have checked her into the boards!


NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 4:06 AM

MSG


Hey all morning:) I will be bopping in and out as I have a horrendous amount of stuff to do today:(

Hickeys- can't have em don't care if others do ( I bruise super easily and no matter how gentle it'll end up looking like I was struck by a baseball bat)

Casual sex- Not had it myself, but I hear it can be fun as long as both parties have respect for each other and are just having a good time:)

Number- mine mini my husband's not so mini...but like someone said before doesn't count it's what he does now:)

High Maintainence- I am and I know I am ( my definition would be someone who knows what they want and has high expectation of getting it combined with spending some reasonably substantial amount of time/money/effort on grooming kinds of things. I get manicures and pedicures, dress up lots, own a great deal of jewlery ( real thing as I hate that icky pretend stuff and if you're going to blow $50 + you should get something real not "costume" )so I'd say I am high maintainence, but worth it:)

EDIT- Emma congradulations on the vacation and on being an auntie!!!

Dancing- hey always good to welcome another teacher ( I teach junior high what do you teach?)

must say I admit to really loving the Monkees:)
I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 4:08 AM

DEEPGIRL187


Quote:

Originally posted by Penguin:
Quote:

Originally posted by mal4prez:
So, a group of ice dancers practiced before we got the ice, and one time this little old lady skated over to where I was sitting. She had blue eye makeup, a sparkley pink sweater, and those shiny stretchy fabric boot things over her skates. (I'm not making this up) and she said - "A nice girl like you ought to be ice dancing.



Quote:

You should have checked her into the boards! ]

Now, now, Penguin. We'll have mercy on the old lady. The other guy, though, he should've gotten checked. And maybe hit with a hockey stick a few times for good measure.

**************************************************

"These words are all I have so I'll write them."

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 4:14 AM

MAL4PREZ


Quote:

Originally posted by deepgirl187:
Now, now, Penguin. We'll have mercy on the old lady. The other guy, though, he should've gotten checked. And maybe hit with a hockey stick a few times for good measure.



That was totally my thought! The little old lady was cute and harmless. But the zamboni guy only raised a stink on the nights when we happened to see me in my sportsbra. (It happened twice) What a creep.

High maintenance: I can only think of When Harry met Sally. Sally defines high maintenance! (Is thhis not when the term came into play? It was the source of it for me.)

I definitely have my druthers about the food and froofy coffees I buy, but if I don't get my way I don't freak or get mad. So that's high maintenance without being nutty.

-----------------------------------------------
I'm the president. I don't need to listen.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 4:14 AM

PIZ


Quote:

Originally posted by msg:
High Maintainence- I am and I know I am ( my definition would be someone
who knows what they want and has high expectation of getting it

Ah, but here's the question: who do you expect to get you what you want?

--
"That's what government's for: get in a man's way." - Mal

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 5:07 AM

RUGBUG


Mornin' all! Why do weekends have to end?

I missed a lot but of the few things I can remember:

Tristan from the last thread: The 7 Seconds did a punk version of 99 Red Balloons that is really good. Don't know if that's the one you were referencing, but....

I was once a Monkees fan. I had a huge crush on Davey Jones (although for the life of me I couldn't figure out the squid reference. Yes, Davey's old and wrinkly now, but? I haven't seen the new Pirates yet, but I'm sure I will get the reference once I do). I did get the chance to meet Davey. His daughter (Talia) ended up leasing a barnmate's horse and they would be at the same horse shows back when I was a teen.

Hickeys: I'm not a fan of visible ones.

High maintenance. I don't like high maintenance SO's and not really fond of HM friends. The effort required to keep them happy is just too much. But, I define HM as someone who has the all-about-me attitude. Energy suckers, if you will. It has little to do with how long it takes you to get ready or if you enjoy pampering.


NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 5:20 AM

TRISTAN


RugBug, morning!
Yes, 7 Seconds...that's the one. The singer actually goes into German for one of the verses. Good song, that one.
The squid reference is to Davey Jones as in "Locker"...POTCII movie.

I missed the high maintenance question, too...gorram it, my attention is not up to par yet!

I do not like HM people. At all. Let me clarify that...those that require others' attention or otherwise. If you yourself are HM, and don't cause problems to other people, I have no problem with that. But someone who claims 100% of the attention to their own needs 100% of the time? No, thank you. I don't mind the ocassional bouts of an SO becoming high maintenance (bad time of the month, really bad week, etc), because I am ocassionally high maintenance. But those that think the world, or a relationship, revolves around them are too full of themselves to interest me.

Oh, completely off any topic we have discussed, and I am sure most of you know this...Discovery landed without any problems after a successful mission. They're home!

______________________________________

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 5:28 AM

MSG


Piz- I expect me to get what I want for myself...'cause otherwise I'd just be a bitch!

Ok if we define high maintainence as someone who always wants their own way and is whiny and nasty about getting it then I am not...

I would just say that I am really picky about myself and how I take care of myself and it does take me about an hour if I am getting dressed...if it's just yoga pants and a pony tail then 30 min:)

Yea for Discovery and nice to have them safely home again:)!

Ma4prez- I understand completely we occasionally had that problem when someone who didn't understand came backstage during costume changes..in ballet you do not have time to go all the way down to a dressing room, strip completely, and change into a whole new 8-10 piece costume and then run back up and onstage in under 2 min...so you change right there and no one cares who sees what..but we've had a few patrons come backstage and do the same " it's disgusting and immoral etc...freak fit" I say you just mow that guy down with his own zamboni

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 6:02 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Mornin' all. Not alot to say. Went to a coworkers wedding. Miserable. Lots of eye candy, just not on the mood for any BS.

On a brighter note: My sister is officially in Mexico. Not really sure how to proceed.

Sill waiting for Ms. Whatever to return my call this weekend. Gotta get her out of my system. Realized that she poisioned me somehow.

Gotta do payroll. bE BACK EVENTUALLY.

"Better dead and cool
Than alive and uncool."


NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 6:13 AM

TRISTAN


Morning, NVG!
Um, Mexico...I am guessing this is a bad thing.
Sorry to hear about the wedding...wish it had turned out better.

We'll be here when you get back.

______________________________________

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 6:15 AM

MSG


Hey NV darlin- ok so Mexico hmmm? as for the wedding so just not in the mood for eye candy? Wow Ms. Stupid really did poison you:( HUGS Bappin hand still on stand-by and as a friend once said" when a man stands back and lets women fight it is with the cherished hope that clothes will be ripped off along the way."

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 6:18 AM

SMARTBUTDUMBBLONDE


OK, people, I'm gonna tell you now that the first half of this post is going to be ranting. Sorry in advance, but this really made me mad.

Right. *Deep breath* At the beginning of this year, I had this really great geography teacher, and he was a really good teacher, but he left, and now we half this young one that never does any work, like he just gets us to copy out of textbooks, and he tries to be pally with us, and we're all like: um, no and I've talked to a couple of the other girls in my class and they agree too, sometimes we get the feeling he is trying to flirt with us *shudder*. Anywho, we did this he-uge geography project as part of our coursework, and we just got the rough drafts back today, and everything that I have missed out or done wrong: he has done for me, he even included research! no some people may say that this is good, but I resent it. he walks us through everything, like we're idiots when we're actually the top set, and he tells us exactly what is going to be on every test. Yeah, I want to get a good mark, but I would like to do it by myself, thank you very much, and if he gives me all the answers, then that is clearly not the best that I can do, and it won't be a real mark and wont reflect my true abilities, and that just makes me so mad, because I want to well because I can, not by cheating.
Ok, I'm done now.

On a lighter note, we had a sex education today at school, which was pointless, because I have learnt far more from this board than from today. Just kidding. They showed us a slideshow of diseased genetalia, and my god, It has practically put me off sex for life!

I reckon HM is needing to have attention all the time, and constantly having to be in the limelight, and if they're not, then they have to steal it off someone else. They have to have what they want all the time. I don't get it, every once in a while is ok, but I couldnot deal with being the centre of attention all the time, I am a very anti-social person. Both my parents are very anti-social, so I am doublly so


Eagles may soar, but ferrets don't get sucked into jet engines.
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 6:24 AM

MSG


Smartbutdumb- HUGS sorry for the lousy teacher. I always feel frustrated when someone has a lousy teacher since I am a teacher...If he's flirting with you I'd say something to an administrator! Hang in there we aren't all bad:)

ok now I have to go get my husband's car's oil changed not really happy about that as I have already done a ton today, but deep breath:)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 6:25 AM

TRISTAN


SBDB, boy, sounds like you are not having fun in class. Sorry to hear that...we need to warm up the engine for patronizing teachers? (Absolutely no threat is intended for the teachers amongst us {msg et. al}, just for this idiot).

Also, glad we could help with the education part...just hope it was in a good way!



______________________________________

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 6:28 AM

SMARTBUTDUMBBLONDE


Mock if you want, but what does SO mean? I have been trying to figure out for ages, but to no avail. Symphony Orchestra? Silence Of (the lambs)? Sailors Only?

Eagles may soar, but ferrets don't get sucked into jet engines.
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 6:42 AM

DEEPGIRL187


SBDB, you might consider speaking with the administrators at your school. It sounds like the teacher in question has really started to impede on your learning. How can any student learn if everything is done for them?

On the other hand, it may be possible that because of the teacher's age, he thinks it more important to make friends rather than teach. In any case, it might be time for someone higher up to intervene.

**************************************************

"These words are all I have so I'll write them."

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 6:46 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Its okay SBDB, we're all a little squishy in the brainpan. Significant Other.

Yes folks, Mexico. She ran to her boyfriends side and is not dealing with the problems at hand. May return with ten new American citizens.

Felt very out of place. Though, I did show up very over dressed and Shiny. Had to run home and change into what is called my "preacher" shirt. I guess better over dressed than underdressed.

And yes MSG, that is the benefit to chick fights.

"Better dead and cool
Than alive and uncool."


NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 6:53 AM

SMARTBUTDUMBBLONDE


MSG: If it gets any worse, then believe me, I will!
Tristan: I am now so very corrupted

Eagles may soar, but ferrets don't get sucked into jet engines.
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 7:04 AM

SMARTBUTDUMBBLONDE


It may just be that I am having a blonde day, but I am guessing that by ten new citizens you mean kids...? Mexico eh? ole!
It is always better to face up to your problems, because if you run away, they'll grow, and grow, and then catch up with you!

Here's an imponderable: do you get along better with members of the same sex, or the opposite?

Eagles may soar, but ferrets don't get sucked into jet engines.
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 7:07 AM

TRISTAN


NVG, I am sure you overwhelmed the other wedding goers with the sexiness that is NVGhostrider. Probably a good thing you did change...probably saved several people from collapsing due to uncontrollable emotions! :bigrin:

SBDB...um...we deny everything!

______________________________________

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 7:20 AM

EMMARIGBY


Quote:

Originally posted by msg:


EDIT- Emma congradulations on the vacation and on being an auntie!!!



Thanks! I appreciate yur kind thoughts!

I'm reading the imponderables guys, but too busy to reply to them all yet. I'll get back to you in a few days!

___________________
"I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they fly past!" Douglas Adams

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 7:33 AM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE


I'm not sure I agree with the general definition of high maintenance as being a spoiled, self-centered attention seeker. I tend to call those women brats, spoiled, princesses, etc. (And when it's a guy, either a jerk or a queen, depending on his orientation. ) Spoiled brat and/or drama queen are a good all around titles for that sort of behavior, I think.

I tend to think of a high maintenance person being like a high maintenance car. It isn't that the *car* is looking for attention, it's just that things go wrong with it, it needs things fixed often, and it needs to be babied in order to run as well as other cars do naturally. Some people don't have the time or patience for that sort of car, but some people *love* to take an old car and restore it and baby it. Having a '67 Mustang fixed up and shiny is worth the high maintenance time to some people.

I'm high maintenance in that way. I don't demand attention, especially not in public. I'm horribly embarrassed when I *do* have to make a deal out of something. Living with a chronic illness means that sometimes I have to leave from a party early, or go find a quiet corner, or whatever. I try to do that with as little fanfare as possible, but I've found that telling the host quietly that I'm not feeling well means that they don't think I snubbed them by leaving early.

I don't take that long to get ready (though my husband might disagree on that front, lol), I dress up maybe twice a year, and I just got my nails done for the very first time last month, when I was in a friends wedding (her gift to us bridesmaids). I tend to wear the same set of jewelry every day, with jeans and a tshirt, and I'm only passingly interested in what other people think of how I look. I think you can be girly without being high maintenance, and you can be high maintenance without being especially girly. I just happen to not be all that girly.

But I do require a lot of maintenance. I like attention and snuggling, etc, and I've said before that both hubby and I spoil each other. We're both the sort of people who prefer to be in the same room together as often as possible, and we have a trouble understanding couples who talk about having time or space away from their mate. In addition to that, my health puts a lot of limits on my activities, and means that I have to travel with quite a bit of equipment. I'm on five different prescriptions, walk with a cane when the pain is bad, and generally can't do much after a certain time of night. Activities like hiking or paintball are right out. Even driving for too long can be an issue.

I realize I'm high maintenance, but outside of my marriage, I try to draw as little attention to it as possible. And between hubby and I, I try to be honest about my needs, honest about how I'm feeling, and do as much for myself as I can.


As far as the "you shouldn't be X because you're a woman," hell yes, all the time. The story of my life. Apparently, I shouldn't have my career, much less an interest in this industry, simply because I have boobs.

And as such, I get along much better with members of the opposite sex. The only women I've ever been able to make friends with (in real life, anyway) are those who are in the same industry I am. Like I've said before: I'm Kaylee in Shindig, talking to the guys about engines.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 7:57 AM

TRISTAN


Afternoon, CK!
My wife is like you are...and by default, Kaylee. She spends time talking to the mechanics where she works over the female coworkers. Kinda funny, she says she has very few female friends...claims they are too "catty" and caught up in themselves sometimes.


______________________________________

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 8:08 AM

SMARTBUTDUMBBLONDE


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:
Kinda funny, she says she has very few female friends...claims they are too "catty" and caught up in themselves sometimes.


______________________________________


she's right. If I had had to go to an all girls school, I think I would have died. I cannot be doing with the whole behind the back bitching thing, although I don't have much against gossip. There is a fine very fine line between bitching and gossip. Gossip is sharing the maybe facts, bitching is adding your derogatory opinion. Also, boys tend to get my sense of humour better than girls, but maybe thats just me.

Eagles may soar, but ferrets don't get sucked into jet engines.
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Monday, July 17, 2006 8:08 AM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE


Yep, too catty, and I can never quite figure out what they spend their free time doing (when they aren't complaining about how much their boyfriends/husbands play video games at least, lol). I end up with very little to talk about with them, and I'm not very good at reading body language in women, so it's all kinds of uncomfortable.

I've found kindred spirits in women who feel the same as I do, who have interests similar to mine, but we still rarely talk about the usual girl-talk things.

And computers are my machine of choice.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

YOUR OPTIONS

NEW POSTS TODAY

USERPOST DATE

OTHER TOPICS

DISCUSSIONS
Joss was right... Mandarin is the language of the future...
Wed, November 27, 2024 09:32 - 35 posts
Where are the Extraterrestrial Civilizations
Tue, November 26, 2024 06:25 - 55 posts
Is Joss Whedon finished as a film maker, is his future destiny to be some muttering version of Brigitte Bardot, Jane Fonda, Sean Penn, Charlie Sheen, Danny Glover?
Sun, November 24, 2024 06:15 - 13 posts
Bad writers go on strike, late night talk is doomed
Fri, November 22, 2024 13:49 - 22 posts
Here's how it was.....Do you remember & even mourn the humble beginnings?
Mon, November 18, 2024 09:38 - 13 posts
Serenity Rescued by Disney!
Fri, November 15, 2024 00:31 - 5 posts
What is your favourite historical or war film/television show???
Fri, November 8, 2024 07:18 - 37 posts
When did you join poll?
Tue, November 5, 2024 04:28 - 69 posts
Best movie that only a few people know about
Mon, November 4, 2024 07:14 - 118 posts
Halloween
Sun, November 3, 2024 15:21 - 43 posts
Teri Garr, the offbeat comic actor of 'Young Frankenstein' has died
Thu, October 31, 2024 20:20 - 5 posts
Poetry in song
Sat, October 26, 2024 20:16 - 19 posts

FFF.NET SOCIAL