GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Male and Female Imponderables--Our remedies oft in ourselves do lie

POSTED BY: TRISTAN
UPDATED: Friday, July 21, 2006 19:31
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PAGE 3 of 3

Wednesday, July 19, 2006 9:58 AM

BLACKSHAMROCK5


Thank you for the birthday wishes. The day went quite well.

As for the phobias thankfully I don't really mind spiders or any kind of bugs really...unless they get on me then I completely freak out. The SO on the other hand is deathly afraid of roaches so I have the pleasure of trying to kill them for him. The key word being trying.

With that theory I think we can all agree that no good can come from pirates...unles they let you choose.


Shamrock

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 9:59 AM

PDCHARLES

What happened? He see your face?


Well CK,

I tried the whole special engagement thing. I did it in Central Park. Had Flowers, champ. and chocolates in the room when we got back too. (What's wierd is Onemanshort posted a pic like 100 yards from where I did it in that random images thread.)
Looking back on it, she was more of the one-on-one do it any ole day at breakfast type of gal. Didn't really plan it to be all extravagant, I just held off for the trip. I Usually go up there a week before X-mas every other year.

The engagement only lasted a few months though or Arrrrr!




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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 10:00 AM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE


Hey Tristian, we honeymooned there too! We stayed at the Grand Floridian (with the red roof in the background of the picture I just posted), which is where I'd wanted to stay since I was a little girl. We found out at our wedding that hubby's aunt had been on the team that designed both the Wedding Pavilion and the Grand Floridian. Thought that was a pretty cool connection.

Now we live close enough to Disneyland to justify annual passes, and we're planning on going back to Disney World for our 5th anniversary. We aren't real big on the characters, we don't have our house decorated with Disney stuff or anything. We just like the atmosphere. Like you said, big kids at heart.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 10:06 AM

TRISTAN


CK, we stayed at the Pop Century hotel (not pictured here ) and had the time of our lives. We were there in Oct. of 2004. We'd like to go back, but it's a bit of a hike, and getting the time off would be difficult to say the least. It was a good memory, though!

______________________________________

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 10:15 AM

SERYN


ok, i will state here and now, you brit bashers, when we create a monster, we do it well! It takes DECADES to die from CJD (see? we even had time to give it a new name) or the human form of foot and mouth. (footinmouth disease perchance? I know i'm a sufferer...)

we are so good at creating diseases that you don't even know you have it for years. And then they tell you and your dead with in the week. Self fullfilling prophecy maybe? or perhaps the fact that the doctors are so crap they wont admit you're ill until its really bleedin' obvious.

but anyway yes, when we brits do something we do it throughly, and 6 months is no safeguard against it.

Africa i can understand almost, though if you get malaria or ebola you'd probably realise it before you got back to the blood bank. But i always figured this little isle was reletively free from tropical diseases. we don't even have rabies.

(yes, all those anti chunnel protesters are feeling right idiots now)

Anyway, i looked up camel spiders on'tintanet, and my god are they ugly brutes. but you'll be glad to know that they are not big, clever or venomous. they ain't even spiders, and they don't attack humans. or eat folks. so you can rest easy.

Your robot reminds me of you. You tell it to turn it stops. You tell it to stop it turns. You ask it to take out the garbage it watches reruns of Firefly.
http://www.myspace.com/seryndippyt

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 10:24 AM

MSG


ok baby fell asleep and I have a few moments:) Wow guys glad to know we all have phobias and I'm not a complete nutball:)

Penguin- I'd donate, but they won't let me. Since I am on ritalin permanently and have had mono( which doesn't ever go away only goes into remission) and I seriously doubt anyone needs to wake up from an accident or major surgery to ritalin withdrawl and mono:)

Wedding proposal- ok my husband and I totally disagree on this story so here is my version. He proposed to me sitting on the bed at his apartment and just after I said yes and was heading to the phone to call my parents, his borher called to say that he and his long time (8 years) girlfriend had finally gotten engaged. Not wanting to rain on their parade, I waited till after their wedding 9 months later to announce we were engaged ( which just about killed me)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 10:26 AM

SERYN


oi, lots of good can come from pirates.

Jonny Depp for one.

ok, on the subject of pirates, D*C this year we're dressing up and having pirate day.

now i recently found my Kermit toy, and it sits perfectly on the shoulder.

could you take seriously a blood thirsty rum drinkin cutthroat pirate... with kermie on her shoulder? I just like him more than any parrot.


I too am very worried about NV - did he mention he would be away at all anywhere back in the other threads?

would it help i sent a message too?

Your robot reminds me of you. You tell it to turn it stops. You tell it to stop it turns. You ask it to take out the garbage it watches reruns of Firefly.
http://www.myspace.com/seryndippyt

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 10:32 AM

MSG


nope Seryn he was here monday and seemed stressed and really down and he didn't show up at all yesterday or today. I say the more the merrier. I hope he's just taking some personal time to relax like we all suggested, but if he is I'm surprised he didn't say anything though he doesn't have internet at home just work... So I say go for it and email him. At least when he gets to work and opens his email he'll see all of us wishing him well and being concerned and that is always nice

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 10:39 AM

FUTUREMRSFILLION


I will beat her up for you!



one of the Forsaken TM

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 10:46 AM

MSG


ok just looked at the camel spiders...what deranged loon of a scientist made those things...'cause there is no way those things are naturally occuring...I mean come on spiders that aren't spiders that big

Anyway, a ponderable...If you SO really didn't want kids, how would you feel about that?

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 11:09 AM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE


MsG, I'm in that situation currently. Hubby doesn't want children, I would like one or two. I have five younger siblings and 33 first cousins, so having lots of kids is a big thing in my family. I haven't wanted six kids since I hit puberty, but I always assumed I'd have one or two.

Enter hubby. He's an only child, and he laid out from early in our relationship that he doesn't want kids. I actually had to make the decision at one point -- do I walk away from the person I think is the love of my life, my soul mate, in favor of the idea of potential children? I couldn't do that. I made the choice that I'd rather have him in my life than not have him but have children with some other man.

Since that time, though, my health has declined to the point where it hasn't even been an issue. Every time I get a new doctor, I get the "do not attempt an unsupervised pregnancy!" speech. I think they assume that because I'm 25 and have been married for a few years, that I must be planning on having kids soon. Half of the medications I'm on are balanced around my birth control, and so would have to be carefully re-balanced if I went off the birth control, and then re-re-balanced if I got pregnant. The other half (the pain meds), I couldn't even take if I got pregnant, and would have to stop taking if I was trying to get pregnant. So it isn't even up for debate right now.

But we have talked about what not having kids means in the long-term, and what other things we'll have to make a priority to compensate. I'm very family oriented, and grew up in a big extended religious family. So some of the things hubby and I have agreed on is that our next house will have a guest room, so that family can come stay with us. We'll make it a priority to go to all my siblings weddings (first one is three weeks away!), to always send birthday presents and make birthday phone calls, and to always go to my parents' place for Christmas (even if/when I complete my conversion to Judaism, heh). We make community charity work more of a priority, and I get to be involved with a religious community (as long as I don't drag hubby along ). We're getting used to the idea of being the "cool aunt and uncle", who always send you video games for your birthday, and take you to Disneyland and to the beach when you visit them in California. With my five younger siblings all still actively Mormon, I'm betting that we'll have *lots* of nieces and nephews.

Oh, and I've informed him that at some point, I will require a dog. Not now, but maybe 5 or 10 years from now, depending on our housing situation.

I know it's going to be difficult once my siblings start having kids, and I don't think I'll ever stop wanting a baby. And I'll continue to think that we'd be really cool parents, heheh. But I still think I made the right choice -- I can't imagine my life without my sweetheart. I'm not sure I would have made it through the past few years without him.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 11:27 AM

SERYN


Personally i'd be happy about an SO not wanting kids - i'm not fond of the idea, and would hate to disappoint them or eventually convince myself that they're a good idea.

We're a small family, my father has a few brothers and sisters, so we've cousins, but we rarely see them, so i'm not used to the huge volumes of family like CK is (BTW CK, i really don't know how you do it, you really do rock)

If they did really want them, i'm still not sure i'd have my own. but i've never been adverse to the idea of fostering or adopting - older kids, 7 and up, Or maybe just teenagers. but i'd find a way to satisfy their need to nurture with out giving up my life (if i had kids i would be a mum, i wouldn't work -out of the home at least- if it was at all avoidable) maybe if i realised i could cope i'd consider my own.

i don't know, thats all way into the future. I have to find someone who can put up with me for longer than ten minutes first.

Your robot reminds me of you. You tell it to turn it stops. You tell it to stop it turns. You ask it to take out the garbage it watches reruns of Firefly.
http://www.myspace.com/seryndippyt

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 11:31 AM

TRISTAN


msg, sort of in the child dilema myself right now. The wife and I want them, but we want to be financially stable first. One of my big concerns is that I am up there in age to be having children now. I am not a geezer, but I would be something like mid-50's when the child graduated from high school. But, I have the mindset of Zoe...I want to meet my children some day.

______________________________________

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 11:37 AM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE


Heh, there's nothing to it, Seryn. Younger siblings just came along with no input from me, and I got used to having a new baby in the house every two or three years. It was odd when the youngest turned 3. I got massive baby hunger, and I was only 15! Being the eldest is fun though, since I got to be bossy.

Some of my cousins do bug me, but thankfully they've never all been in the same place at one time. And with 33 of us between the ages of 6 weeks old and 37 years old or so, there's no way we'd all be able to attend each others weddings and whatnot. (I just tried to name them all, and I came up four short. Gorram hell!) If I'm lucky, I hear about my cousins' weddings before the actual day, but there's no way I could match up all the spouses with the correct cousins, lol.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 11:54 AM

RUGBUG


Have known a few women who had marriages break up over the children issue (they didn't want them, husband did). My closest friend in the area is currently dealing with this issue. She would be perfectly happy to never have kids. Her husband of two years wants them yesterday. She says she's going to do it, but it saddens me because she's always trying to put it off.

Have a college friend who never wanted kids. After 14 years with the same guy (meet him first week of college) she had a child. She just had her second about three weeks ago. She says she really enjoys motherhood, but was also very specific about what it would take for her to be willing to go that route (she stays home, she gets a sitter three times a week, etc).

I don't want children. Haven't wanted them for the last nine years or so. And you would think, at my age, that I would be hearing some sort of clock ticking. But I don't and I don't want to try to hear something that just isn't there.

***************
"My feelings are changeable but intense" Anya (season 7 Buffy)

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 1:30 PM

ELOISA


Ah, kids. I'd like them. Unfortunately I'd like four or so and would like to give birth to them all between the ages of 30 and 33 (familiar dichotomy: twenties far too young, after 35 far too old). And as I'd want an SO before having them... looks like nothing in the pipeline for a good long time.

Regarding phobias, I'm scared of needles. Very scared. When I'm having jabs the nurse has to talk to me the whole time or I freak out. For this reason, I give blood, as I'm trying to get over it. Also scared of spiders (irrationally so, as there are no dangerous ones in Britain; I just got surprised by one once is all) and specific pseudo-dangerous situations - going over jumps on horses (though not simply riding them), going out of my depth in the sea (although I can swim perfectly well), heights that haven't got a safety rail (... it's the drop, not the height, that kills you) and aeroplanes. I am a wuss. However, I have a vacuum cleaner with one of those hoses on the end instead of an upright, so spiders etc. get sucked up. Hurray.

Someone asked in the last thread about why nobody was choosing to bed Inara. Speaking as an entirely heterosexual woman, I see both Kaylee and Zoe as being far sexier. Inara's alluring, but she's like the statue of David - too unyielding, deep inside (until Mal melts her, when she turns into candle wax instead).

It's very hot in London. 36 in the shade today, up to 47 in the sun and on the underground, 52 on the buses, when the UK record in the shade is 38 and I think the world record is 56 in the shade in Death Valley (incidentally, UK animal welfare regulations prohibit the transportation of live animals at temperatures over 27 degrees; humans are evidently less valuable), still 19 now and I can't sleep as a result. This is aggravating. Reminds me of an imponderable, though: is either gender meant to be better than the other at regulating internal body temperatures?

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 2:44 PM

WHITEFALL


Well, I gone and done it, I'm wearing my bandage thing still, all went fine. Gave the blood, actually havent felt lightheaded at all, not like the first time... But I did just walk/bus home in what was probably 80s or 90s (F) at least.... Oh well, it worked out, and them stanford folk got a little more blood for other folk.

Ugh, proposals... I hate the idea of them, because for one thing, i dont want to do them because it seems chauvanistic and rude: i'd either wait to long, or much much worse, propose early and force someone into a relationship. (Not force exactly, but force them to make a descision on the matter when not necessarily ready...)

Kids: I like kids, I'd like to have some permaybehaps, but I dunno what I'd do if I ended up with a wonderful lady who didnt want em... bah, that'd be awkward. Eh, whatever, i'll burn that bridge when i come to it.



"But, these strong women characters?"

"Why aren't you asking 100 other guys why they don't write strong women characters?" -Joss Whedon

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 2:47 PM

MSG


CK- we seem to be living parallel lives. Your description is exactly what I am in with my husband except I am 32 and my siblings do have babies. One is 10 months one is 14 months and I am always driving down to hang out and play with the babies except that makes me want them more. I just wish my husband wanted them. I really think I'd be a good mom and that he'd be a good dad, but his family isn't very loving or close and I think that put him off the idea....or it could just be that I'd be taking care of the baby and not him ( just kidding:)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 3:26 PM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE


Lol, MsG, no kidding! My husband's reasons are basically the same -- his parents divorced when he was young, he shipped back and forth but always felt he didn't belong with either parent. He's been on his own since graduating high school. His dad died a few years before we met, and he's not at all close with his mom. So I think deep down, he has a fear that us having a kid would ruin our relationship. And of course, I'm willing to admit that if I force him or talk him into it, it very well could do bad things to our relationship. I'd rather have us both happy and on the same page with nieces, nephews, and dogs, than have a kid and have him resent me (or the child!) for it.

Though the thing I find funny is that he's *terrified* of children under the age of 8, but he's fine with anyone over the age of 8. When I take a step back and think about it, I can see why -- if you've never been around that many 4 year olds in your life, how do you know how to talk to one? How do you know you won't say the wrong thing to someone else's kid?!

But the funny part about it is that my youngest brother was 8 when hubby and I first started dating. They've always been great buds. My mom took a picture of the two of them running around in her back yard with their big yellow lab -- matching blonde hair, matching huge grins. It's like the progression of the soul: happy boy to happy man, to happy dog.

So I do have to wonder how hubby will react to infants and toddlers and preschoolers bouncing around at Christmas in a few years. Maybe he'll get used to them, and not be so scared of them. Maybe the "hey, that wouldn't be so bad" thoughts he's admitted to having from time to time will grow into something more. Or maybe we'll just be the cool aunt and uncle. As long as *some* amount of family is in my life, I'll be happy.

(And if my brother lives up to his promise of starting a family right after his wedding -- which is in three weeks -- then I could very well be an aunt by this time next year, woot!)

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 3:37 PM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE


Posting again to say, Eloisa, 47 is bloody hot! (That's about 117 for us here in the States.) 35 or so is fairly normal for summer in the southern US, and a lot of places in the US are right around 43 to 46 with the heat wave right now. It was about 32 (90-ish) at the beach here last weekend, which is just unheard of! Fantastic since it warms the water up a few degrees (the Pacific is ruttin' cold, even this far south) and makes the water actually feel refreshing rather than freezing, but still. What is going on with this weather?!

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 4:39 PM

JAMESTHEDARK


I have a quick personal question that you can feel free to ignore, but started bugging me today...

As some of you (maybe four or five) might know, I'm a Fanfiction writer, and I wanted to know if my complete ineptitude with social and interpersonal matters is translating through. Feel free to ignore if you either never read my stuff or don't feel like answering.

--------------
I ain't lookin' for help from on high. That's a damn long wait for a train don't come.

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 4:46 PM

FUTUREMRSFILLION


*FMF streaks through the thread. Nekkid. Cause she's streaking.*



one of the Forsaken TM

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 7:02 PM

DANCINGNEKO


Long post warning...

*digs out a slip-n-slide and turns it on so there's something to cool off by (and give FMF something fun to streak to before going she goes back to the Foresaken thread)*

Fears: Can't really say fear but I can say with all certainty that I heartily detest large 'roaches (where I live, they're called "B-52's" for a reason -- ever so honkin' big and they fly *shudder*). Can't even get the nerve up to kill them with a rolled up newspaper -- have to trap 'em in something and toss 'em outside. *shudders* I've had a broom closets with those buggers inside *shudder* -- talk about skin crawling every time I had to use that closet...

As for sharks...it might be where I live, but some of the kanaka maoli (fancy way of saying "Native Hawaiians") have viewed sharks as a sort of "family guardian" type. So I've just grown up with a healthy respect (not fear) of them.

*hugs MsG* I say your husband was a sleepy boob. Knowing myself, I'd probably do something as stupid if I'm exhausted.

PR: For me, I'm just a bit slow on remembering who doesn't like certain things (especially food-type things) so I'm usually the one who will simply offer a sample of whatever I've ordered if it's something new/unique. Food allergies, on the other hand, I'll go out of my way to make sure that there are foods that are allegin-free.

As I'm typing this and thinking of how people tend to blow off my food allergy, I've come to a conclusion PR and Trisan: These things are usually just outside of what people consider "normal" that they have a hard time accepting it. (I can tell you stories about my odd food allergy and people's reactions. *bleargh*)

GED: Don't ask me...I personally swear that all the decent single men where I am are buried under these rocks. (If I'm lucky. I tend to think they're not on these rocks at all.)

Donating blood: Tried twice. First time in high school, got very lightheaded for the rest of the afternoon (yes, I did eat and drink after, it was just really weird). Second time, I ended up with a bruise on my inner elbow so big and so sensitive that if a bag fell midway on my forearm, it hurt like the bloodyblueblazes ...I've kinda decided that I'm not going to push my luck to see what happens on the third try.

Sports on TV: As one of those who gets easily distracted by the moving pictures, I suggest that's the reason why most guys do it *ducks assorted items flying this way*. But then again, that's just me.

RugBug: I'd vote the horse's head (purty!) and offer the suggestion that if you know anyone who can write the characters for 'horseman' in script, maybe they can make it look a little more horse-y. (I realize that might be a stretch, since I don't know if you live or know anyone who can do that kind of thing.)

Proposals: I'd have to find a guy to date first!

Kids: I can't tell you. I think a part of me would like some keiki before I reach my 40's, but I've got to find the guy first.

*waves to VinterDraken*

JamestheDark: Haven't read any of your works yet, let me see and I'll get back to you.

That's it for now...

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006 9:48 PM

ODDSBODSKINS


have to confess, i don't get the sports on TV thing, some exceptions, i'll watch tennis, and can sit through cricket for a spell before i get bored, but mostly i'm not into it so much. So i really can't speak definatively about the appeal, but if i was to hazard a guess, i'd be inlined to go with something along the lines of surrogate achievements (if that wasn't a phrase before i'm gonna abuse it until people accept it). being able to take the achievements of another (televised achievements no less ) and feel positive about them, feel a sense of accomplishment for picking the winning team/player.

although reasons for supporting football (soccer football not the american version) in scotland have so very little to do with sport, or any kind of accomplishment. there're much more important issues of racism, bigotry and violence intrinsic to the whole thing! well, the old firm anyways.


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Thursday, July 20, 2006 12:18 AM

SPACEANJL


I think men are like cats - they like to watch the pretty moving things Husband can be entranced by motor-racing...

I can combine two things here - I think I might have a child phobia. Like Seryn, I hear no ticking. Luckily, the husband is even more squicked by it than me. We hide away and clutch each other in terror when people start hinting heavily.

With the amount of woogy bugs an' beasties out there, my uneasiness about spiders and craneflies just looks like wussiness. Not keen on big dogs, though that is a 13 style story. And I'm sorry, but I don't like horses much either - bitten, stomped, thrown...great big piles of panic, and I'd rather eat one than ride one again.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 1:52 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Rugbug, I love the horse. I think the two could be combined, though.
Consider:

Just a thought.
Proposals. Well, I have a bit of an odd view on marriage, or so I've been told. I really, honestly don't see the point. If you love someone and will be with them forever, then you love them and will be with them forever. If you don't, then you won't. No piece of paper is going to make one or the other true.
I like to use my mom and stepdad as an example; they lived together for awhile before they got "married". I put it in quotes because there was nothing signed, just a ceremony. They had rings and a quick ceremony and that was it. Then later my stepdad's insurance provider changed and said they wanted a marriage license to prove they were really married (they had been living with each other for eight or nine years at this point, and had their ceremony at least six years prior) so they went to the courthouse and signed something so she could be covered under his insurance.
So anyway, from that end it really seems like it didn't matter to them that they hadn't signed on it. On the other side, my parents were obviously divorced, so I saw the complications that signature caused when they decided they didn't really want to be together forever.
So now that I've gotten that out, I will describe my perfect proposal, ring, and ceremony. Proposal... I think it would be really sweet if I was being snuggled at the time, maybe just waking up in the morning, one of those moments when you just don't want to leave the bed or a lover's arms. Very non-traditional, when you think on it. Ring, I want a heart-shaped ruby. Diamonds are boring. Ceremony, I want a handfast in the woods, probably presided over by my lovely best friend, who knows me well and has wonderful energy. Would we sign anything? Meh. Maybe.
That was longer than I thought it would be.
At this point I don't want kids, so I might be okay with someone who didn't want kids. I do have the arrogant notion that my genes should be passed on, though, so if I ended up with someone who was sure they never wanted kids, I would have to do egg donation, I think.
I'm very unsure about kids. Raising one just seems so... wow. I don't know. Overwhelming I guess would be the word then. But I think I would have a lot to teach one. But I'd want help from daddy and I'd want to be financially secure. Since I hate our public school system I would want to either be able to home-school a child or send them to a (non religious please!) private school of some sort. And of course at this moment in time it is really a moot point. I would definitely not want more than two. If they were anything like most of my family members, including myself, more than two would kill me. And I really don't think the world needs more people. But then where would we be if no smart people reproduced?
One other thing is that my brother is six-and-change years older than me, so I think he should go first
Yes, back to the crew-bedding, (speaking as a not entirely hetero female) I've always found Zoe to be far sexier. Far, far sexier. And after her is River. It's not just the bad-ass factor, I really think they have more striking features. Inara is almost too classic; there's nothing interesting about her face. Cheekbones and very full lips are yum.
I've actually realized that's something that nearly everyone I'm wildly attracted to has in common when it comes to appearance; that have wonderful, fabulous, gorgeous lips. You should have seen Ex of Doom's lips. Anyone else I'm attracted to it is a slow attraction based on many, many other things. I can't believe I only just realized this.
I didn't used to have a problem with needles. Then I had my wisdom teeth out and actually had one jabbed into the crook of my arm. It wasn't done right and I got this huge bruise that hurt of days afterward.
Yeah, I don't think I'll be giving blood any time soon. You know, I'm not even sure what my blood type is. My dad is AB negative I think. I looked it up and I could have either A or B since my mom is O so I don't actually know. Huh.
Wow, I feel like that was less typing than usual. All that horse-talk for awhile, I guess
*edit* OK, still a massive post, though. Nevermind.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 2:57 AM

TRISTAN


Morning, all!
Thought I was going to have to start another thread first thing this morning, but it's only at 12-something, so we're ok for awhile...

Coffee, then back to the boards. See you all in a minute.

______________________________________

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 3:16 AM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Quote:

Originally posted by lysander:
I performed for six years in an ampitheatre at the base of a mountain. Being from Texas, we would get turantulas, scorpians, vinagroons, and the occasional rattler. As long as you don't bother them, they tend to leave you alone (not all the time, but most of the time). Several times I would have to lay on the stage with a scorpian or spider just a foot or so away and try to pretend that I was sleeping.



Hey - Lysander - you're an actor and since you're Lysander and you've had to sleep I'm guessing you've done A Midsummer Nights Dream - my first Shakespearean experience and one of my faves - I was Helena BTW when I was 18! Can't imagine doing it with scorpians on the loose though!

MSG - sorry I arrived so late - I started reading this before I went to the theatre with friends and spent a few anxious moments thinking a spider was crawling on my neck before I realised it was my own hair!!! The power of suggestion - I too feel creepy for ages after seeing a spider, and had a been you SO (& therefor a boy) I would have hugged you no matter how sleepy I was!

Vinterdraken - I too am afraid of water - the idea of suffocating in it mostly ... yeah I guess it's actually called drowning! As an Australian I've known how to swim since I was abou 5 but I am not a strong swimmer and still hate getting water up my nose - makes me panic! Also afraid of sharks until I swam over one - it was a gummy shark and after that I was a bit blase!

When I was growing up we went to a gorgeous National Park called Wilsons Promontory, and there were so many snakes, spiders and generally creepy crawly things on the loose that I would go bush-walking (a passtime I LOVE) with the attitude of a chiaoua (sic?) - has anyone ever noted the dainty preciousness of their walk?? One day I walked right past a Tiger snake and after that I realised that it was true - if you didn't bother them they generally don't bother you! I've seen black snakes, tigers, browns & one I can't remember but was told was very venomous!

Gorgeous Phoenix Rose - Hi! I also loath and detest spiders!! We have wolf spiders in our houses over here and once I had one (the largest I have ever seen) in my car! I was so scared I froze and my driving instructer (yes, it was during a lesson) had to pull me out of the car! uh oh - I'm hyperventolating as I write this!!

Still - I guess it's comforting to know that these and other phobias are 'versal!!

Well - I think I'll make a hot drink and go to bed! Big day/night tomorrow!!

Lovin' you all! - Mags x x x

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 3:38 AM

STILLFLYIN


Marriage- There are benifits to going through the ceremony: it simplifies inheritance and power-of-attorney. But there also emotional benifits , going through the ceremony puts something binding to the relationship in addition to the public announcement that going through the ceremony. I am Christian, but do not agree with what the Catholic Church says about getting married in a church is an absolute necessity.
Children- It does seem overwhelming, though I too am vulnerable to the passing on my genes urge. I think that two would be how many I want to have, enough to maintain the population with out depleting it.
Needles- Never had a problem with needels, patrially because my parents gave me every immunization available so I was conditioned early, so I never had a problem with getting blood drawn. When I got my wisdom teeth out the doc spent 10 minutes searching my arms for a vein, they eventually had to put it in my wrist.
Crew-bedding- Definetly River, beautiful, intelligent and an excellent fighter. All three of which add up to extremely attractive.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 3:49 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by magdalena:
Gorgeous Phoenix Rose


I don't think I can express how very much I love this nickname. Happy little dance!
Quote:

- Hi! I also loath and detest spiders!! We have wolf spiders in our houses over here and once I had one (the largest I have ever seen) in my car! I was so scared I froze and my driving instructer (yes, it was during a lesson) had to pull me out of the car! uh oh - I'm hyperventolating as I write this!!

Still - I guess it's comforting to know that these and other phobias are 'versal!!

Well - I think I'll make a hot drink and go to bed! Big day/night tomorrow!!

Lovin' you all! - Mags x x x


Icky icky icky spiders!

Sleep well lovely one. Remember to breathe!

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 3:49 AM

MSG


*blinks* morning:) I really hate being awake at this hour sometimes...CK- yeah I was smiling when I read your stuff. I still can't figure how my husband can enjoy our niece and nephew so much and still not want them...I really really love kids ( as in every job I have had EVER except for make-up artist has been nanny, daycare provider, or teacher) at 32 I am definitely hearing the tick tock of the biological clock, because if he changes his mind( please oh please) I will have only a few short years to get pregnant and all before it's not a great idea...

ANYWAY- so here's an imponderable Does it make a difference to you what gender you boss is?

For me, most femal principals are so in to proving they are tough that they ride roughshod over others and are very abrasive. I'd much rather have a male principal.

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 3:52 AM

MIRCEA


Morning Yall. Hope everyone's doing well

I do the job, and then I get paid.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 3:54 AM

SPACEANJL


Not good with authority figures myself - I prefer to be either the boss or my own boss. My boss at the moment is not only younger but a friend of my brother, which rather weakens his authority.

Have to respect whoever I work for, and that has been sadly lacking in the past. (I've had some truly mad and borderline illegal employers) Maybe I need to open that bookstore I've been promising myself. Paid to read...

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:02 AM

TRISTAN


Hmm. I agree with StillFlyin's explanation of the marriage ceremony. I think it's a way to include those you love in a public display of your devotion to each other. Let's call it a theatrical production for your friends. I also do not agree that it needs to be done by a religious leader of any kind to be "proper". A judge will work, or a ship's Captain...and yet, the man who married my wife and I was a Reverend...but a friend first. Does that make sense? I think it's important to be married "in the eyes of the law" for the very reasons StillFlyin mentioned.

msg, my direct "boss" is a female. The owner of the Agency is male, but a lot of the day-to-day decisions and "orders" come from the female office manager. I have no problem with it at all. She is not out to prove herself, as she had done so many years ago. She can be abrasive if things do not go all that well, but she has time enough to show me, the newest one here, how to do things.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:03 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Well, that's another thing that comes down to people. The first boss was female, pretty good boss, pretty good person. Second boss was male (actually had several male managers who rotated, most were very cool, but two of them were... annoying) third was an underhanded bitch, fourth was a sketchy, sketchy character, my least favorite boss, and that one was male. Currently I have three female managers. They can be nice, but I suspect there's some things beneath the surface.
Did I mention I'm looking for another job?
Bleh.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:09 AM

MIRCEA


I might get to see my boss as often as twice a week if I'm lucky. He's a good enough manager when he's around, but thats just not that often

I do the job, and then I get paid.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:17 AM

SPACEANJL


Bosses are better from a distance. You can actually get on with your job with out a lot of performance-related team-building crap. Or they want to be your friend, which is creepy - like teachers being your 'buddy' at school.

I had one boss go SWF on me, even moved into the flat upstairs. Run away, run away....

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:21 AM

MSG


Hey I think a large number of my students count me as their friend....and I'd say I am friends wtih many of them. Mind you I am their grown-up (ok sort of grown up) friend they go to for advice and comfort when things go wrong

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:25 AM

SPACEANJL


Didn't mean that kind of friend, MSG. You know exactly the kind of thing I mean - was it SBDB who is having the issues with the newbie? You are still a figure of authority whom they trust. It's when the lines get blurred - never been convinced that an effective boss can be a friend...if only 'cos friends are usually there to be moaned at about the SOB at work!

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:26 AM

PENGUIN





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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:30 AM

MIRCEA


Morning Penguin

I do the job, and then I get paid.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:32 AM

DAYVE


There's a lot to be said for being self-employed - i set my own hours and schedule - my benefits package is a little lacking though.

I have, in the past, worked for several small publishing companies and i've had my share of odd jobs - and the only boss i can think of that was sort of unusual was an openly gay male in a very straight town, which led to some interesting work days - I've only had one female employer - and she took over the business i worked for after her husband died - we were already friends and the working relationship was not a problem. I was never fired from a job, and i always maintained good relations with previous employers.

Now I, on the other hand, can be tough to work for... i have a few employees on the ranch, and for the most part we get along well. My SO says i'm too much the perfectionist and sometimes ask the workers to do things that aren't always necessary - but i like to have a clean, orderly place and maybe i go overboard a bit.


"endeavor to persevere..." Chief Dan George as Lone Waite, Indian chief

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:37 AM

MSG


ah yes the teacher who wants approval so much they willingly let the kids get away with murder or over-help them etc...that's not friends that's pitiful...Teachers need to be the grown-ups especially because so few kids have boundaries at home and it's hard to grow up when you have to be the grown-up all the time



I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 4:38 AM

RUGBUG


Happy morning to all the imponderables!

Bosses: As long as the particular person is a good boss, I don't have a problem, although I do think women can be more difficult to deal with. For the last six years I've worked with someone in management that wants me fired. She's a huge pot-stirrer and hates the fact that she can't poison the well against me. I'm also not intimidated by her, so that frustrates her. After about 4 years, others in management told her to back off (I think because I mentioned the magic word: "harrassment") and things have been much better, but I still have to be sure to interact with her in a very specific manner. Working with women can be a very difficult balancing act, but I don't necessarily think that's a bad thing. Only when it produces undue stress.

***************
"My feelings are changeable but intense" Anya (season 7 Buffy)

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 5:16 AM

MIRCEA


Take care yall. Probably not gonna be around for a while, so have fun and be safe.

Q: How much does one man's sorrow weigh?
A: As much as he allows it to weigh.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 5:17 AM

MSG


Felt the need to share this


EDIT- well wherever you are have fun Mircea:) HUGS
I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 5:19 AM

LYSANDER


Morning everyone. I would say good but yesterday was really rough and I'm feeling it this morning.

Magdalena - This is my 9th year doing A Midsummer Night's Dream. It is also one of my favs. I've been performing in our local Shakespeare Festival for nine years now. It's a lot of fun. Have you done anything else?

Simon: What if he(Mal) tells you to kill me?
Zoe: (without hesitation) I kill you.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 5:29 AM

LYSANDER


Missed the boss thing on my last post. I've had several jobs and have been lucky enough to have some really cool bosses (both men and women). Unfortunately, I'm currently in a position with a boss who has a major Napoleon complex. He has no clue what is going on but does what he can do to take all of the credit for it. We really don't get along all that well because he takes the credit for all of my projects. He also does not like the fact that all of our co-workers like me more than him. He wants to get rid of me but I'm a good worker and he's intimidated by me. That can be fun from time to time.

Simon: What if he(Mal) tells you to kill me?
Zoe: (without hesitation) I kill you.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006 6:10 AM

TRISTAN


Lysander, I really dislike those that steal other's thunder. Napoleon-complex...I like that description!

It looks like we are close enough that I can start another thread...be back in a bit.

New thread:

http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=22436
See you over there!


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Friday, July 21, 2006 7:31 PM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Quote:

Originally posted by lysander:

Magdalena - This is my 9th year doing A Midsummer Night's Dream. It is also one of my favs. I've been performing in our local Shakespeare Festival for nine years now. It's a lot of fun. Have you done anything else?



Hi Lysander - sorry for the long pause - I went to see 'The Pajama Game' last night and also went to a 21st! (I love that I still get invitations to those!!)

I have done 'Romeo & Juliet' (Juliet), 'McBeth' (weird sister), Emilie in 'Othello' (another terrific experience!), and 'Hamlet'! (yes, it was an all girl production! Most lines ever!) I also did Abigail Williams in 'The Crucible' when I was 18 and have played 'Oliver Twist' in a dramatisation of the novel - not an all girl cast this time either!

Biggest show ever the Australia/New Zealand tour of Nicholas Nickleby where my favourite role was the understudying of Fanny Squeers! But I did most of the female roles (ex Kate Nickleby) and all of the narration either as an understudy or in my own right over the 8 1/2 hour long production! Worked with some wonderful performers too!

I have passed out on stage (for real) and not missed a cue and also had to contend with a very haunted theatre in Wellington but never a rattle-snake (thank goodness!) - I'd love to hear more of your stories!

Chookas for now!

Love - Magdalena x x

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