CAPTION TIGHTPANTS RISE AGAIN! #1 by TenthCrewMember

GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

CAPTION TIGHTPANTS RISE AGAIN! #1

POSTED BY: TENTHCREWMEMBER
UPDATED: Friday, September 15, 2006 16:53
SHORT URL:
VIEWED: 8490
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Thursday, September 7, 2006 2:16 PM

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Yep. I'm back! CT is back!

Neither Reavers, nor Companions, nor Operatives could keep me away any longer. :D

So without further ado, I reckon we kick it off with the namesake, Ol' Cappy his own self, and see where things go from here.

MAL: So this is the battery-powered thing Kaylee puts twixt her nethers. Huh.

Y'all know the drill, so have at it!

Oh, and a few reminders about CT:
Submissions can be made by anyone, anytime, and multiple times (we like multiples!).
New CTs will be posted every Thursday, and vote eligible submissions will be accepted through the following Monday. Tuesday and Wednesday will be for voting. I reserve the right to tiebreak, though I probably won't. ;) Invite your friends, play, lurk (though we wish you would play!), and enjoy the hi-larity of sick folk known as Browncoats!

Oh, and one last thing, please don't stop playing COT's OTHER SHINY CAPTION GAME...it is, well, shiny! The more captioning the better!

Um, are you still reading this? Go post a funny caption already! There's nothing more to read here. Really. Go! Go post! Or at least read the funny posts! Sheesh... ;P

http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew

*Download my Firefly Games for FREE at
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=13&t=12622

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 2:22 PM

ONEMANSHORT

Mal: Jayne! Will you please stop poking me in the eye with my my own pistol, at least have the common decency to use Vera!

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 2:27 PM

Several seconds later, it would be Mal's great misfortune to discover the pistol was, in fact, loaded.

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 2:34 PM

YINYANG

You were busy trying to get yourself lit on fire. It happens.

Mal admired his gun, then realized it was melting in his hand.

Mal (in his head): Hmm... chocolate.

---
http://richlabonte.net/tvvote

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 2:47 PM

DAVESHAYNE

Lady, you don't stop asking me to show you my "gun", I'm gonna do it.

David

"Not completely as well as the series of Firefly..." - From a review of Serenity at amazon.de

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 2:48 PM

SIMONWHO

It was only the size of the applicator that made Mal comfortable with pencilling in his eyebrows.

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 2:50 PM

BROWNCOATSANDINISTA

After realizing the extent of River's Psychometric powers, he attempted to Telekinetically stop his pistol as it flew towards him.

"I'm not going to say Serenity is the greatest SciFi movie ever; oh wait yes I am." - Orson Scott Card

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 3:14 PM

JPSTARGAZER

It was only fair that Mal begin to pistol whip Simon since, after all, Mal did warn the crew not to say "shenanigans."

"All I got is a red guitar, three chords, and the truth...the rest is up to you"
--Bono

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 3:22 PM

PDCHARLES

What happened? He see your face?

It puts the bullet in the skin. It does this whenever it is told.

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 3:26 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

YODA(OS): The force you will feel, through you it flows. Burn in a special hell, you will.
MAL: Figures...

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 3:27 PM

RMMC

Mal, having watched a little too much Star Trek, tried to mind-meld with his pistol.

*****
RMMC

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 3:33 PM

INTERL0PER

"No, you can't carry-on four metric tons of bobble-headed geisha dolls. You'll have to check it like everyone else"

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 3:40 PM

WOLFEN68

Yosaffbridge, if you're gonna shoot me, at least point the barrel my way and get it over with.

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 3:42 PM

YINYANG

You were busy trying to get yourself lit on fire. It happens.

The captain pauses a moment to admire his reflection...

---
http://richlabonte.net/tvvote

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 4:19 PM

ELDUSTO

"Hey, look. Inara's naked."
As the cameraman turns around to look, he gets shot in the back by Mal, and so does his puppy.
-OR-
"I wonder if the magazine is going to fall out again?"
-OR-
"..."
Jayne just said something dumb and Mal is giving him the dumbass look.

http://www.geocities.com/neo_ultimate_d - The Homepage
http://www.myspace.com/eldusto - The Myspace page

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 4:20 PM

SHINYTRINKET

"That's the trouble with these gorramn things - you have to watch 'em every minute!"

*************************************************
The 3 rules of aging:
1. Never bypass a bathroom
2. Never waste an erection
3. Never trust a fart

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 5:03 PM

CITIZEN

Is this a pistol which I see before me,
The handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee.
I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.
Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible
To feeling as to sight? or art thou but
A pistol of the mind, a false creation,
Proceeding from the heat-oppressed brain?
I see thee yet, in form as palpable
As this which now I draw.

More insane ramblings by the people who brought you beeeer milkshakes!
No one can see their reflection in running water. It is only in still water that we can see.

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 5:08 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

I read that ^ and I think "Even funnier with a John Wayne accent!"

-TCM

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 5:56 PM

FLORALBUNNY

^So right, TCM^

Nathan had rather enjoyed his fluffy Firefly
hair, and roundly resented his re-styling for
Serenity, which involved heavy gel and an
oversized parting tool.

bun, parting (with a p)

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 6:19 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Mal pondered how Shepherd Book got such an enormous 'fro with such a small hair dryer.

OR

MAL(thinking): I wonder what this lever is for?

OR

Amazed by the simplicity of it, Mal couldn't help
but smirk when Jayne passed out cold, frightened
by the ol' "floating gun" trick.

OR

MAL: You're gonna put that WHERE, Doc?!?

OR

Nathan was showing off on the set again, this time using the same telekinesis trick he used on a Bic pen at a convention once...

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Thursday, September 7, 2006 7:56 PM

VERSEEXPLORER

Mal glanced to the side to see if anyone was looking before he extended the telescope to look into Inara's shuttle.

or

Zoe: Mal, you can't shake that giant "We're number one finger" out the window during the Alliance / Reaver battle.

_______________________________
Mal: Saffron, you're pleasing, you're all kinds of pleasing, and uhh...it's been awhile, a long damn while, since anybody but me took a hold of my plow.

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Friday, September 8, 2006 6:54 AM

SICKDUDE

Mal: Well, that went well.... Now I have the gorram thing glued and epoxied to my forehead!

or

Mal: I like the weight of the thing....

or

River (OS): No playing with guns, my hiney!

"I am your father, Luke. Give in to the Dark Side, you nob!" - Doug McKenzie

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Friday, September 8, 2006 7:03 AM

FUTUREMRSFILLION

Mal pondered the age old question of "if it were up your arse would you know".

(Sorry, my boys have been flinging that saying at each other all week!)

----
Bestower of Titles, Designer of Tshirts, Maker of Mottos, Keeper of the Pyre

I am on The List. We are The Forsaken and we aim to burn!
"We don't fear the reaper"

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Friday, September 8, 2006 8:29 AM

ORPHEUS

"No one else on this gorram ship, so you musta been talkin' to me..."

OR

Natnan Fillion's rejected audition tape for Casino Royale.: "The name's Reynolds. Malcolm Reynolds."

____________________

"Bible, Wrath of Khan, what's the difference?"

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Friday, September 8, 2006 9:20 AM

FRELLINGBLONDE

"Now Doc, I warned you what would happen if you got Kaylee in trouble. Down the aisle or out the airlock, your choice."

(He would SO react like that. Probably enjoy it, too.)

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Friday, September 8, 2006 10:00 AM

BIGWOLF18

*into mirror*

nathan" you talkin' to me? are YOU talkin' to me? well theres nobody el.."

joss(o.c)"... what are you doing?"

nathan" er..wa?..oh um, i was just...er, never mind."

*nathan walks out, hanging his head in shame.*

OR

*mal pulls his gun out of the back of his pants where river hid them.*

mal" oh, so THATS why my pants are so tight."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

we are THE FORSAKEN and we aim to burn!

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Friday, September 8, 2006 10:08 AM

TRISTAN

Nope. I liked the older model better...had more flash than this one.

______________________________________

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Friday, September 8, 2006 11:44 AM

GOJIRO

It's not the size of your pistol that counts. It's how you shoot the target.

-------
Are you an Ohio Browncoat? If so, join our Yahoo group for news and events: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio/

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Friday, September 8, 2006 12:02 PM

CITIZEN

Hopes were dashed as the little pistol was lost for the pistol parade was in just five minutes!

More insane ramblings by the people who brought you beeeer milkshakes!
No one can see their reflection in running water. It is only in still water that we can see.

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Friday, September 8, 2006 5:02 PM

FLORALBUNNY

On occasion, Mal still wondered if YoSaffBridge
had kept her promise not to tell anyone how easily
she had gotten his pistol out of his holster.

bun
9/19 Arrrrrrrrh!
9/20 Happy Birthday, Captain Mal!!
9/30 Happy AnniVersary, BDM!!!
==We aim to exponentiate==

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Friday, September 8, 2006 8:28 PM

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA

Quote:
Neither Reavers, nor Companions, nor Operatives could keep me away any longer. :D

What happened? Companions got tired of you, decided to let you go?

Welcome back.

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Jayne(os)holding nozzle: Finished gassin' the Mule up, Cap'n!

Mal: That's the diesel pump, Jayne. The Mule needs low octane gasoline.

Jayne(os): Huh? (mutters) Gorram antique veehicle piece of gohsa. (outloud) Can't we get a new one?

---------------------------------------------
How many Jaynes does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to try to put it in and another to find a bigger hammer.

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Friday, September 8, 2006 8:42 PM

VERSEEXPLORER

Mal: Saffron, don't you go pointing that hot curling iron at me. Uuuh, or maybe we could talk?

_______________________________
Mal: Saffron, you're pleasing, you're all kinds of pleasing, and uhh...it's been awhile, a long damn while, since anybody but me took a hold of my plow.

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Saturday, September 9, 2006 12:37 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

It wasn't his plow, but Mal aimed to take hold of it just the same.

BWAH!

TCM

http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew

*Download my Firefly Games for FREE at
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=13&t=12622
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In or near Ohio? Join us!
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http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio

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Saturday, September 9, 2006 3:58 PM

CHOLLETT

Nathan: "Aaaalright, who left this gun hanging here? SUMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEERRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

OR

Mal: *sigh* "That is IT! I have HAD it with these m*****f****** snakes, on my M*****F****** SHIP!"

OR

Mal (to Simon): "Can you sail under the command of a pirate? Or can you not?"

I'm babbling like a moonbrain.

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Saturday, September 9, 2006 7:03 PM

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE

Good to see you agaiin TCM!

MAL:"Whoa, i had too much of that Mudder's Milk, it looks like the gun is floating in front of me..."

OR

MAL(singing):"Cleaning my gun with the safety off, safety off, safety off...."

(simpson reference)

OR

MAL:"This is a 44-magnum, with full barrel auto-lock, and a smooth shaft for extra comfort and sexiness; it is also equipped with a hairpin trigger mechanism, and the entire gun is hinted with a delicate orange flavour..."

(decline of video gaming, anyone?)

OR

MAL:"It's just...so.....BEAUTIFUL!!!"

INARA(os):"If only he could act like that around me..."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Creator of "THE OTHER SHINY CAPTION GAME"!
www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01
Time for some thrilling heroics!
poor_noel2@hotmail.com

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Saturday, September 9, 2006 7:06 PM

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE

In the staring contest between Mal and the gun, the stakes were high, but the gun wasn't backing down, while Mal was looking more determined than ever. Unfortunately for Mal, the crew all bet large sums against him.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Creator of "THE OTHER SHINY CAPTION GAME"!
www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01
Time for some thrilling heroics!
poor_noel2@hotmail.com

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Sunday, September 10, 2006 2:58 AM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

MAL: Shiny! The Force really does work!
GUN: BLAM!
JAYNE(OS): AUGH! Gorramit, Mal! This was my favorit shirt!
River(OS): You almost killed him with your brain...

BWAH!

TCM

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Monday, September 11, 2006 2:14 PM

DAVESHAYNE

BUmp, bump, bump.

David

"Not completely as well as the series of Firefly..." - From a review of Serenity at amazon.de

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Monday, September 11, 2006 2:30 PM

RYCE

Welcome back, TCM!!!

Mal (talking to his gun, Shiny-Man): Well, if Jayne can name his guns, I can too. Okay, Shiny-Man, we've got ten paces to count. When I turn, I'll draw and you do your thing...
Gun (thinking): "Shiny-Man"? What in the sphincter of hell kinda name is that? Now Vera, that's a true name for a gun!

No power in the 'verse can stop me!

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Monday, September 11, 2006 2:55 PM

RMMC

Mal (thinking) 'I' before 'e' except after 'b'...no...that's not right. 'I' before 'c' except after 'e.' Naw, that still don't sound right. What the gorram hell am I doin' in a spellin' bee ta begin with?

Kaylee (cheerfully OS): ...and the winner gets two whole days with no injuries!

Mal (thinking): Oh, right.

******
RMMC

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Monday, September 11, 2006 3:25 PM

TRAVELER

"Joss, just how much more dark and brooding do you want?"

Traveler

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Monday, September 11, 2006 4:01 PM

BIGDAMNTEXAN

Mal(singing cadence)-*this is my weapon ,this is my gun,this is for pleasure, this is for fun!

or
Mal-*Gorramn it! I know I just saw a space monkey on my gorramn ship!

or

Mal-*I don't care what kinda dance you were doin' ,Jayne, we work before we play!
Now go put your rain stick up!
And Jayne ,pull up your pants!

Jayne-* Aawww!

Alway's misbehavin'

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Monday, September 11, 2006 4:06 PM

CAUSAL

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Yes, ladies and gentleman, this exquisite piece can be yours for the low-low price of only nineteen nine ninety-nine. Call now; supplies are limited!

________________________________________________________________________
Grand High Poobah of the Mythical Land of Iowa, and Keeper of State Secrets

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Monday, September 11, 2006 4:14 PM

BROWNCOATSANDINISTA

In reference to above.

"Sing Song River Voice: [whispering] Is that you, John Wayne? Is this me?
Mal: Who said that? Who the rut said that? Who's the slimy little Purple Belly gos se twinkle-toed boy-whore-sucker down here, who just signed his own death warrant? Nobody, huh?! The fairy ruttin' godmother said it! Out-ruttin'-standing! I will P.T. you all until you ruttin' die!"

"I'm not going to say Serenity is the greatest SciFi movie ever; oh wait yes I am." - Orson Scott Card

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Monday, September 11, 2006 4:41 PM

DRAGONWINE

Mal: Ya know you MSTK3 folk all look alike, now are you Tom Servo or Crow?
Gun (thinking): What an idiot. Doesn't he know it's MST3K? And note to self...shoot agent for not telling me of off Broadway musical of "Guns of Navarone"

It's a nothing part til you don't got one, then you have to go to ebay.....aaaaagh!

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Monday, September 11, 2006 4:45 PM

FLORALBUNNY

In actual practice, Joss is prepared to use
something more draconian than the "chain of
command" in eliciting the desired responses
from his actors. Here he urges Nathan to work
harder imitating Summer's "scrunch" face.

bun
9/19 Arrrrrrrh!
9/20 Happy Birthday, Captain Mal!!
9/24 Ditto, TCM!!!
9/30 Happy AnniVersary, BDM!!!!
==We aim to exponentiate==

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Monday, September 11, 2006 4:52 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Nathan: I aim to mispronounce...crap.
Nathan: I aim to misconstrue...go se!
Nathan: I aim to misunderstand...fei oo!
Nathan: I aim to misbehave...shit! No wait!
Nathan(thinking): Maybe if I stand here and look pretty, they'll just keep rolling...

Bun, why are we making copies of me on the 24th? ;P

BWAH!

TCM

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Monday, September 11, 2006 5:04 PM

GIRLASKEW

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:
[

Mal leans in to give his one true love a kiss.
Or
This is my pistol, this is my gun. This if for fighing, this is for fun.
Well, his other hand could be any number of places!

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Monday, September 11, 2006 6:14 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Either this is the way to the Special Hell

OR

IT'S VOTING TIME!!!

http://vote.sparklit.com/web_poll.spark/1005792

Vote for the 2 you like best as Caption Tightpants returns to the warm and fuzzy folds of FFF.net!

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Tuesday, September 12, 2006 6:52 AM

DAVESHAYNE

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:
Either this is the way to the Special Hell

OR

IT'S VOTING TIME!!!

Could be both.

David

"Not completely as well as the series of Firefly..." - From a review of Serenity at amazon.de

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