GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Male and Female Imponderables--Pop Goes the World

POSTED BY: TRISTAN
UPDATED: Thursday, October 19, 2006 06:04
SHORT URL:
VIEWED: 6834
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Tuesday, October 17, 2006 2:51 PM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"


Someone else is awake?

"Well, here I am."

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Tuesday, October 17, 2006 4:57 PM

TRAVELER


Man, everytime I get on one of these Imponderable threads the women start talking about panties or tight jeans. Who needs porno.

You gals are a hoot.

Did they ever use "hoot" on Firefly, because I'm finding myself using this silly word more and more. I feel like I've been brainwashed like in the "Manchurin Candidate" or something.

Well I like plain cotton briefs myself. Feel snug and don't chafe.

The picture does not look familiar to me. I do not remember Jayne in that kind of surrounding. It could be Badgers. He does like antiques, but Jayne never stood alone in Badgers hideout. He was always near Zoe or Mal. It may be a scene they never used. They must have plenty of those. I thought "Heart of Gold" but Jayne was dressed different in that episode. And again he had a woman under his arm one minute after he got inside, so I don't remember him being alone in that one either.




Traveler

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Tuesday, October 17, 2006 5:10 PM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Penguin!! Hello my dear one!!

Please forgive the length of this post - it is just my responses to the last thread - so there will be more to come...

Quote:

originally by MsG
”Hey that's a great ponder...What would be your idea of a good Casual date???”


Sorry my gorgeous MsG – I missed this one as I was going to bed last night – I once had a delicious date, walking through Melbourne’s Queen Victoria Markets, hand in hand with the (then) man of my dreams… We shared Dutch doughnuts (fed each other) and bought silly little trinkets and just held hands most of the time – at the end we bought fresh food and went home and cooked it together… yeah – I’d forgotten that one!

Quote:

originally by DeskTopHippie
“*ahem* Anyway, the reason I mention this couple is because the guy is turned on by thunderstorms. Something both I and his better half have teased him mercilessly about! I just wondered if any other ponderers are the same? A heavy rain can be sexy, but thunder? Is it because thunder normally means rain, or is it something about the thunder itself? If it is the thunder, is that a guy thing? Any women out there fond of thunder?”



Ooooh – as soon as I go to bed you hit on one of my favourite things – thunder is just so awesome… storms in general are like nature is telling you it’s bigger and stronger than you are and thunder is like… WOW! I love it and yes, in case you didn’t realise it’s a huge turn on for me… Now, being in bed with someone when there’s pouring rain and thunder and all… *shivers & sighs and… oh that might be TMI*


Quote:

originally by JohnnyQuest
“What? are we ‘Dancing at Lughnasa’?...”


I love that play – I auditioned for it once but didn’t look enough like the other actresses cast to play the sisters! My father has done it and I adore the play-write in general – ‘Translations’ is another good one of his…


Quote:

originally bySmartButDumbBlonde
“mud, mud, glorious mud,
nothing quite like it
for soothing the blood
so follow me, follow,
Down to the hollow
where we shall wallow in glorious mud.”


It’s Flanders and Swann – and it’s a blast from my childhood too… my Dad loves them! (& yes, it’s about hippos)
Quote:

originally by SmartButDumbBlonde
“oops, sorry Magda, didn't see your reply there, I'm in between Chester and Warrington - I think...
When did you live in England??”


I lived there for quite a bit of 1995! I know both places well as one of my best friends in England lived in Appelton and we used to go clubbing at Chester – a favourite town of mine… I love the Tudor Rows, the cathedral, the walls, the unexpected Roman ruins around each corner… I miss England…

Quote:

originally by MsG
“Sean Bean- Oh yes please, though I feel compelled to point out that the only way you'd get him on the porch is to bring his daughters with and make sure there was no Sheffield game on...If you saw making of Sharpe's Challenge”


No!!!!! There is a ‘making of’ doco? I just saw the actual show a couple of weeks ago on the ABC and was in raptures because I saw all the original Sharpes series about 10 years ago… and I lost count of how often I saw them too… I had payTV then and it was repeated a lot! *sigh* I would let him phone his daughters’ though … and you know I am partial to playing ‘stepmother’!

Quote:

originally posted by Tristan Thunderstorms. Yeppers, I am one of those guys. Not saying that when one happens I go hunting for females , but if I am in the company of a willing partner, it becomes that much more intense. Just something about the booming, the pressure, the wind, rain, hail, etc. Very primal.

But of course... *suddenly can't breathe properly*

Quote:

originally by MsG
“Thanks guys:) Yeah the kids over-reacted. I guess the kid who made the comment's a bit of a sleaze who last year was busted for taking up skirt pics of girls at school and so the boys saw red when he said that and popped him one to quote one of them " even if you think that you don't say it" yeah like that makes me feel better...”


Wow – just like Mal in Shindig!! Isn’t it a good thing that this sort of behaviour won’t see them in a sword fight at dawn in Utah my gorgeous one!!

Quote:

originally posted by Rugbug
“Whatever. Behold the wonder of my flat and sometimes bony chest. Heh...”


But we have seen your gorgeous smile Rugbug – we don’t want to be overwhelmed!

Well I will now look through this thread - and hope I get to respond before I need to leave for work! *sigh* I love you guys - why do I have to live in another time zone???




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Tuesday, October 17, 2006 5:50 PM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Oh my!! I did miss quite a bit... didn't I? Fans self to calm down somewhat...

BTW – my gorgeous MsG… I love my kids and even when I am reprimanding them I remind them it’s for their own development and because I love them… we have this little game where I say “guess what?” and one or all of them say “you love us?” and I pretend to be amazed at their power to know exactly what I was thinking!!

Quote:

originally by MsG
Oh I've got one. Not really a question more a survey kind of.. So what is your favorite funny memory of a holiday??


You know this is where the English in different countries gets muddles coz a holiday here is a ‘vacation’ there and you are talking about a… ummm… what would we call that? It’s not a public holiday coz that’s a day off…??? Anyway we don’t do Hallowe’en down under…

So mine is usually Christmas – way back in 1988 I was involved in a production of ‘The Life and Adventures of Nicholas Nickleby’ the Royal Shakespeare Company production if anyone is familiar… it goes for 8 ½ hours over 2 sittings and at the end of 6 months rehearsals and 6 intense weeks of performance we finished out final show right on the tick of midnight, Christmas morning… the moment the clock went from 11:59 to 12:00 they sang the first note of “God Rest ye Merry Gentlemen” … and of course we partied ‘til dawn! There were many in the cast who recall that Christmas day as a huge hangover and one of my friends was violently ill all the way from Melbourne to Queensland in the back of her family car… Still it was a wonderful memory for me!

Quote:

originally posted by DeskTopHippie
Heh, on not getting a parking ticket, one of the Buffy writers had a cameo in Once More with Feeling where she was singing to a parking enforcement officer.

Why can't you let it go!
It isn't right! It isn't fair!
There was no parking anywhere
I think that hydrant wasn't there
I'm asking you please no!
I think I've paid more than my share
I'm just a poor girl, don't you care?
Hey, I'm not wearing underwear!

I accidentally sang that out loud on a bus once. I was listening to the episode soundtrack on my diskman. People stared. I had to walk to work for over a month.



I have sung that out loud too DTH!! Fortunately there were 2 friends who knew what it was and laughed so the other folk around just though it was eccentric me and let it pass… It was Marti Noxon who sang it by the way!! I love that episode too!!


And MsG – I love the Jayne pic… Hmmmmm… that actually looks like a photo from one of my fantasies… right before he clears the table with a sweep of his arm and grabs me and… oh sorry… where was I? Has someone been messing with my mind again…? *drools slightly*

…and as for the underwear thing – wearing sexy underwear just gives a girl a kind of a bounce in her step and a twinkle in her eye, and if we chose to share the information of what we are/aren’t wearing… you guys just know you’re in for a treat… and, yes, I did that to a date once… same guy I went to the market with funnily enough – in the middle of a Billy Joel concert! I just slipped his hand onto the suspenders I was wearing and gave him a look – he suddenly thought $160 for 2 tickets was pretty reasonable… …and we girls love getting that reaction too…

Well I think I’m going to have a very cold shower and get ready for work… See you later my lovely friends…






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Tuesday, October 17, 2006 6:32 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Oh dear, I missed so much!
It's snowing here. Wet, heavy, nasty, slushy snow. Blah!
Mmmmmmmm, dates in the rain. I would love to go for a walk in the rain and get all soaked and the rain-washed skin... I'm just going to stop there, because I'm sure there are folks would cringe at hearing the details of my fantasy life
As for nice casual dates, I'm partial to going for tea myself. Doesn't interupt conversation as much as dinner, it's nice and warm, and I know a place that's open all night.
Being fond of thunder... Hmmmmmm, I'm more about the lightning, which is followed by thunder of course. There is something about it that can be quite stimulating. Though of course it makes it less safe to be out in the rain getting all soaked and... Stopping again.
Once had lightning strike a pole right behind my house. I was in the kitchen, there was a mighty flash and simultanious crash of thunder, my vision went white for an instant, and I was just awed and overjoyed. Everyone I tell the story to is all "That must have been so scary!" and I'm sitting there smiling like the Goddess reached out and touched me. Maybe she did.
So is DTH a fellow crazy-when-sober, not-sure-what-drugs-would-do-to-me kinda girl?
*considers*
And she's Pagan.
*big, shiny happy eyes* I thought I was the only one of me!!! *give DTH a huge hug*
And hey, you should use one of the cameras at the centre, as you say they have stuff, and just upload there. That's the beauty of photobucket!
What about sinking teeth in? I wouldn't slap anyone who... Okay, stopping again. Well, if you bite too hard you might get slapped...
In terms of not wearing any underwear, I think it works best while wearing a skirt. A flowy skirt. This is the only way I can go without, for one thing, and come on, what kind of thoughts flash through the mind at that?
I wish I could afford lots of sexy underwear. I personally think it's sexy, and I never got any complaints about it. Most men like that sense of 'mysetery' I think. Of course, it has been awhile since I had reason to buy fancy 'bedroom outfits' or ever wear any of the ones I have, and a few don't fit me anymore...
Hey, so here's a question. I'm 21 years old, why are my breasts still growing????

Oh, and I don't recognize the pic either, but I can tell you it doesn't look altered to me.

http://www.bigdamnthankyou.com - show 'Versal your gratitude!

A good friend who points out mistakes and imperfections and rebukes evil is to be respected as if he reveals a secret of hidden treasure. - Gautama Siddharta

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Tuesday, October 17, 2006 6:43 PM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Hello Mei Mei... got to go but!! you first!

I don't think it's altered either... lighting is too balanced to be superimposed...

I had a similar lightening experience earlier this year - we were rained out at a school fete and the kids and I were laughing and giggling - it gave me such a high!! All the other grwon ups were looking worried and dashing away with their children - but that's why I am a kid at heart!!

I knew we were safe, even though we were just about 6metres from the strike point!

Love you all - Magda x x x




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Tuesday, October 17, 2006 6:44 PM

CHRISMOORHEAD


Quote:

Originally posted by magdalena:

…and as for the underwear thing – wearing sexy underwear just gives a girl a kind of a bounce in her step and a twinkle in her eye, and if we chose to share the information of what we are/aren’t wearing… you guys just know you’re in for a treat… and, yes, I did that to a date once… same guy I went to the market with funnily enough – in the middle of a Billy Joel concert! I just slipped his hand onto the suspenders I was wearing and gave him a look – he suddenly thought $160 for 2 tickets was pretty reasonable… …and we girls love getting that reaction too…



Unacceptable. I think that women and men need to start realizing that this isn't as "fun and games" as it appears to be. So many people (and by that, I mean everyone except for me) are willing to approach this subject with a huge, shit-eating grin and accept accusations of manipulation with a giddy "Heh heh, yup!". But I'm not joking.

Last week while at a friend's house who rooms with several other people, including two very attractive females, one friend of mine offered up $50 to on of the females after she made note that she was broke. She did not asking him for it. He simply overheard her and offered it. She, of course, was more than happy to accept.

Am I the only person who feels physically ill seeing this type of manipulation take place with absolutely no feeling of guilt or embarrassment from either party? What transpired there was wrong, and I find it... disturbing that this is a fairly common social interaction. The attractive girl cashing in on guys whom she'd never even consider dating.

The majority of men today are dumbasses controlled by the leash God attached to their crotches. I would like to, on their behalf, plead that any women present not use this type of power so aimlessly. You might all think that it's just fun and games and how the world works, put power without the discipline to obtain it, quite literally, scares me.

I was just watching an episode of "The Unit", and who should appear on screen but Summer Glau? In a bathing suit... Have you ever wanted to cut off your finger tips just to control the desire to touch someone? People numb themselves to these types of things, but the last time I felt that emotionally confused, I was covered in blood.

You can say I'm over-reacting. Maybe I can't point out any specific times where this type of female-dominance has led to a particularly heinous crime. But I likewise cannot fathom a time where it would lead to any amount of good, either.

[IMG]
"Pain is your friend, it is your ally. It will keep you awake, and angry, and remind you to finish the mission and get the hell home. But you know the best thing about pain? It let's you know that you're not dead yet."

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Tuesday, October 17, 2006 6:53 PM

JPSTARGAZER


Hmmm, underwear. I don't know about other guys, but I can't imagine going without underwear. I mean rough denim and a zipper are kinda scary if you don't have a cloth buffer.

I do have a female friend that insists on asking me which underwear I like in the Victoria's Secret catalog. I always have to remind her that I'm a guy and it all looks good to us. For the record, she's not wearing them when she asks, she's just looking at the catalog...



"All I got is a red guitar, three chords, and the truth...the rest is up to you"
--Bono

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 2:05 AM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Quote:

Originally posted by Kelkhil:
That picture looks like it was taken in that shop in the episode where Simon and River were kidnapped. (brain...can't...recall...title...stupid brain!)

Maybe it was a deleted scene that never got cut into the DVD set?

Kelkhil



It was Safe and I am pretty sure it's not from that one either Kelkhil! Jayne never went into town and I can't think of a reason for him to have done even if it was cut...

I'm still stumped!




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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 2:37 AM

MAVOURNEEN


Good Morning, Everyone!

MsG - As for the pic of Jayne, I noticed a wig on a styrofoam head stand just to the left in the pic. I'm thinking this is a costume test shot taken backstage, and not a scene pic at all. There's a jumble of various props behind him...this was a test shot of some kind.

Happy Thursday!




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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 2:45 AM

TRISTAN


Morning, all!

Yep, thunderstorms.

CMH, haven't seen you in here in awhile...but then again, I've been gone most of the time. Glad to see you back.
The type of manipulation you are speaking of is bad, yes. When someone sets out to deliberately make a gain on someone else, I have issue with that. But the talking about I have seen in here so far have not been evil intentions. I, for one, love it when things like that are sprung on me; the whole "I'm not wearing underwear" thing, I mean. It's not a tease, because there will be sex happening sometime in the near future...sometimes ASAP. It's fun and exciting, and while it is a game it is not malicious.
Now, the manipulation you are talking about with your friend...yes, that was bad. Had it been a close friend asking for help, that would have been different; but it seems they did not know each other very well. I also don't really like people who use their looks or charm to dupe another.
I hope that makes sense... I agree with most of what you have said, but I also want you to look at the 'good' kind of manipulation that's used between couples.

Time for coffee. I'll be back!

______________________________________

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 3:57 AM

NICODEMUS


Has anyone considered that maybe he wasn't manipulated at all, but merely being generous/chivalrous? It is possible that some people simply give to others out of kindness regardless of the recipiants gender/age/looks.

**************

(Thx to Desktop Hippie for the banner)
If you find yourself getting too worked up about stuff that isn't real (RP Threads etc), then go outside, breathe in some fresh air and try feeding the ducks. (Because ducks don't care about your politics, religion, skin colour, choice of music or even your haircut. They like everyone, provided you bring them food.)

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 4:00 AM

TRISTAN


Quote:

…and as for the underwear thing – wearing sexy underwear just gives a girl a kind of a bounce in her step and a twinkle in her eye, and if we chose to share the information of what we are/aren’t wearing… you guys just know you’re in for a treat… and, yes, I did that to a date once… same guy I went to the market with funnily enough – in the middle of a Billy Joel concert! I just slipped his hand onto the suspenders I was wearing and gave him a look – he suddenly thought $160 for 2 tickets was pretty reasonable… …and we girls love getting that reaction too…



See, that's what I'm talkin' about! I would be willing to bet he had no idea what happened during the rest of the concert!

These are the good types. Both parties know what's going on, both know what is going to happen. And we do like it when you share stuff like that with us. I, for one, love the attention, and I don't see it as manipulation at all. It's a form of flattery and flirting, and I would consider it a privilege to be on the receiving end!



______________________________________

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 4:10 AM

TRISTAN


Nico, thank you...I think I was headed in that direction and got sidetracked by work (I sometimes have these respond windows open for awhile). I was aiming to get around to "Maybe he was just being nice" and then totally lost my train of thought. I do think I got my point in there eventually...hang on, let me check...
Yes, the deliberate manipulation for gain. That is what I wanted to say was bad.

Oy. I don't like when work derails my thoughts...

So, CMH, there is a difference, it's just a matter of knowing the difference between 'playing' and manipulating.

______________________________________

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 4:35 AM

MSG


oooh Costume test shot makes a ton more sense. It's a legit pic and I just for the life of me couldn't place the setting, but it would make totall sense i it was part of a series of publicity stills or costume tests.
CMH- I would agree anyone male or female who uses their sexuality to coerce someone into something they don't want is wrong. But we were more talking about the fun flirtatious kind of teasing your partner to make a romantic or sexual connection...
and as for the desperately wanting to touch someone that I just saw on t.v. um er uhhh no comment *cough* moment when Jonny Depp rips open his shirt while standing in the rain in the movie Crybaby*cough*

Magda- yes I forgot for y'all holiday is vacation. So I guess...hmmm just realized I have no idea what you call those lovely collections of Christmas, Easter, etc. that get celebrated...

Tristan- ok you're gonna have to warn us if you're going to do descriptions like that. I'm with Magda. Totally lost my train of thought...

Nicodemus- you know that's a lovely thought and I think you're ever so sweet for making it. I know I love just helping someone out, if it's no big deal to me and will make a big difference to them...why not:)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 4:35 AM

FUTUREMRSFILLION


Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:
[B
Unacceptable. I think that women and men need to start realizing that this isn't as "fun and games" as it appears to be. So many people (and by that, I mean everyone except for me) are willing to approach this subject with a huge, shit-eating grin and accept accusations of manipulation with a giddy "Heh heh, yup!". But I'm not joking.

Last week while at a friend's house who rooms with several other people, including two very attractive females, one friend of mine offered up $50 to on of the females after she made note that she was broke. She did not asking him for it. He simply overheard her and offered it. She, of course, was more than happy to accept.

Am I the only person who feels physically ill seeing this type of manipulation take place with absolutely no feeling of guilt or embarrassment from either party? What transpired there was wrong, and I find it... disturbing that this is a fairly common social interaction. The attractive girl cashing in on guys whom she'd never even consider dating.




OK what am I missing? From what you have written here, she says "I am broke". He says, "well here is $50 bucks" She says "gee thanks".

Who what when where how was the manipulation?


----
Bestower of Titles, Designer of Tshirts, Maker of Mottos, Keeper of the Pyre

I am on The List. We are The Forsaken and we aim to burn!
"We don't fear the reaper"



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 4:42 AM

MSG


It's FMF...yippee!!!!! HUGS Oh how we've missed you.
So how is everything? How are the kidlets? How's the new job? Do you have any opinions on the 3000 topics you missed LOL:)


EDIT- oh and good point. Manipulation would have been if she came on to him, flirted, and then asked for money. The definition of manipulation is
Shrewd or devious management, especially for one's own advantage. To manage or influence skillfully, esp. in an unfair manner: to manipulate people's feelings.
If someone mentions needing help and another person offers it, that's not really manipulation.


I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 4:45 AM

MAVOURNEEN


FMF, you've been missed amongst the threads.
I know your new job is taking up most of your time. How are things otherwise?

PS - *I refuse to google this. Who sang "Pop Goes the World?" I can hear it in my head, but nothing more.


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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 4:53 AM

FUTUREMRSFILLION



Mav - Pop goes the WOrld=Men without Hats I am so sure! OMG! Sorry went valley for a mo'

LOL

MSG - I have to question, is #2's teacher perusing the internet as he sits in her class? LOL

What CMH wrote is not manipulation at all - UNLESS he can prove that (A) female was aware of some sort of crush from the male and (B) USED that knowledge to her advantage and deliberately said she was broke in front of him. THAT WOULD have been manipulation. I, however, naive as I am choose to believe that she was broke and he was kind. That is MY WORLD VIEW and I am keeping it that way.

Work is ummm, completely...I have no words. I am sore in places I was unaware of, I have black bags under both my eyes and I can't sleep. Other than that, the people are nice and it is a 9 minute ride :)


----
Bestower of Titles, Designer of Tshirts, Maker of Mottos, Keeper of the Pyre

I am on The List. We are The Forsaken and we aim to burn!
"We don't fear the reaper"



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 4:54 AM

RUGBUG


Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:
Quote:

Originally posted by magdalena:

…and as for the underwear thing – wearing sexy underwear just gives a girl a kind of a bounce in her step and a twinkle in her eye, and if we chose to share the information of what we are/aren’t wearing… you guys just know you’re in for a treat… and, yes, I did that to a date once… same guy I went to the market with funnily enough – in the middle of a Billy Joel concert! I just slipped his hand onto the suspenders I was wearing and gave him a look – he suddenly thought $160 for 2 tickets was pretty reasonable… …and we girls love getting that reaction too…



Unacceptable. I think that women and men need to start realizing that this isn't as "fun and games" as it appears to be. So many people (and by that, I mean everyone except for me) are willing to approach this subject with a huge, shit-eating grin and accept accusations of manipulation with a giddy "Heh heh, yup!". But I'm not joking.



That's not manipulation...that's titillation. It's very different. The first in unhealthy, the second is hopefully present in any good relationship. In fact, I think the art of titillation (or flirting...) keeps things alive and healthy in a relationship.

Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:
Last week while at a friend's house who rooms with several other people, including two very attractive females, one friend of mine offered up $50 to on of the females after she made note that she was broke. She did not asking him for it. He simply overheard her and offered it. She, of course, was more than happy to accept.



Wait, wait...she didn't ask for the money...she just mentioned that she was broke? He overheard (implying he wasn't even part of the conversation in the first place) and offered her some money? And it's her fault for accepting the money?

Maybe the nuances of the situation are lost in your re-telling, but from what you posted, there is no manipulation. Just because she's attractive and he decided to give her money doesn't make it manipulation. Would it be manipulative if she was ugly? Would he have given her the money if she was?

Manipulation is deliberately setting out to control the actions of others. Did this girl do that? If the guy gave her money but didn't want to, HE needs to get in control of his pecker. It's not her fault.



***************
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 5:19 AM

ZEEK


OK way too much to catch up on. Forgot most of it but these two imponderables.

Thunder - nope doesn't do anything for me. Rain does. Being out in the rain with a girl is hot and being in bed with a girl while it's raining out is hot too. The latter works for snowing out too. Anything where being warm under the covers just feels so yummy. Thunder doesn't do that though.

No underwear vs. sexy underwear? Sexy underwear wins hands down. Cause it means she wants you to see it and that she wants you to take it off. Just seems to build things up better than none at all. That just seems like you're half way to home base. Gotta have a little adventure on the way there.

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 5:35 AM

MSG


FMF- LOL the teacher might be perusing the internet during her prep period...giggles:)

Hey so new ponderable: ( unless someone else has a better one in the time it took me to start writing this, get my class settled, explain the assignment, deal with a troublemaker, and then get back)
Ponder- at what point do you think flirting crosses the line into a bad thing?? Is flirting for fun a good way to enjoy each others company

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 5:48 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Mornin' all.

Flirting can be a bad thing when it leads to "manipulation". I like flirting as I hang out with some females, but it really puts a damper on professionalism when it is most needed.

One thing I really hate is when someone really wants or needs something and leads in with "How Much do you love me?" Been there too many times and I ain't goin' back.

All the bosses are gone and I'm number One. Guess its time for a raise.


PS- Thursdays almost here!

VERONICA

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 6:05 AM

MSG


oooh NV's the boss man. OK now remember power is an aphrodesiac and there's alreay a line of women here who are near enough ready to tear your clothes off and just take you...so be very very careful

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 6:13 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Excuse me MSG, I cannot allow you to speak of my position in such a manner. There may be some reprimands for such talk. :smile;
I can't seem to pick up on being in command unless there is a time of crisis. But there is nothin' sexy about an angry sweaty guy. Is there?

VERONICA

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 6:18 AM

MAVOURNEEN


I don't know, NV.

Mal is angry, armed, maybe a little sweaty- and still damned sexy.
Just channel your Inner Mal and the employees will bow to you.




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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 6:19 AM

MSG


ummm you are so asking the wrong person 'cause angry sweaty guy makes me go all ok wow gonna embarrass myself

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 6:25 AM

ZEEK


ahhhhhhhh! How do you tell a nice person to leave you the heck alone? I don't wanna hang out with you 24/7 dude. I mean I don't even hang out with nice people. We're all total jerks to each other and I love it. Why would I want to hang out with someone who isn't like any of my friends? Leave me alone!!!!


*ahem* Yeah flirting is fun stuff. It can cross the line all over the place though. Like if it isn't mutual flirting. If it's grossing out everyone else around you. Like NV said if it's used to influence someone to do something they don't want to do.

Though for the most part if it's a girl I like who's flirting with me, I doubt I'm going to mind.

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 6:39 AM

SMARTBUTDUMBBLONDE


I was trying to post during the prefect meeting, but I got caught, and had ot turn the computer off.

Tristan: Perhaps you you will see a picture of me, perhaps not! Actually got it because I wanted to put the Alan Tudyk avatar that I played with on the Wash thread - have a nosy.

MSG: thats quite a sweet story, them defending your honour, even if it does show the high levels of testosterone in young boys today! I've said it before, and I'll say it again - I really wish you were my teacher!!

No underwear: Its hard enough for me to remember everything in the first place. Last week, I managed to go to school wearing no bra, and not realise until lunch!! Luckily a friend lent me her jumper, and nobody had noticed. phew

CMH: at risk of repeating everyone else, where the hell was the manipulation in that?!sounds like it was just someone doing a nice thing for someone else.

Flirting is good, its fun, but it can easily go to far, such as making people think you have feelings for them when you don't, and I am very careful to keep it just friendly. Speaking of flirting, I have a quick question/dilemma for y'all when you're not busy.


***************
Eight out of ten voices in my head prefer Whiskers.
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 6:39 AM

MSG


Zeek- I usually go with. I'm glad you enjoy my company, but right now I really don't want company. I'll let you know when I'm feeling more social.

EDIT- SBDB we have time, what would you like to discuss
I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 7:20 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


(Twiddles thumbs)

I hate this waiting. Figured I'll see a movie, do laundry, go to the range, and maybe shoot pool in place of the "date" this weekend. I feel I may have become a little callous to Ms Incredible? and believe it will stand in the way of really communicating with her. The defense mechanism in my heart seems to be working overtime. Maybe this is just my way of dealing with rejection, but it hasn't happened yet. What is wrong with me?

ADD: So I'm also a good target for her to practice her "companion" skills on. It is difficult for most any woman to change my path by flipping her hair or looking at me in a certain way. But she can. Just thought I'd add that little bit of info.

VERONICA

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 7:35 AM

SMARTBUTDUMBBLONDE


ok, here is my thing:

There is a boy in my science class, who I have never really talked to before, but just recently, we have started talking, which has developed into some major flirting. And if its just casual, run of the mill, then I am a donkey - I never seen him act like this around other girls. he's nice too, and sweet, to me anyway, he's a bit of an ass to most other people.
but, he's really far out of my regualar friendship group, and I have no idea what to do.
So here is my question:
Do I take it a step further(please insert next step here,I'm new at this), and risk making a fool of myself, or listen to my fear of rejection and do nothing, keep it as it is (which is fun), and maybe let him make the first move? Which I'm leaning towards at the moment.
what do you think?

***************
Eight out of ten voices in my head prefer Whiskers.
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 7:38 AM

MSG


Well it's just about the way anyoen will react. Once something hurts you , be it a hot stove or a person, you naturally become more cautious and less trusting in dealing with it. I mean you don't repeatedly put your hand on a hot stove and burn yourself. After the first time, your body naturally recoils and puts distance between you and what caused the pain...so I'd say she is the one that should have to overcome the hurt she caused. Don't you worry about being cold or distant. She caused this problem and if she wants to be with you then she needs to find a way to fix it and show you she isn't going to hurt you before you trust her again...of course this is just my opinion and all, but remember we're always on your side sweety...and she hurts you againa nd I will snatch her bald and drag her through the streets...

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 7:40 AM

SMARTBUTDUMBBLONDE


someone did that to my cousin once...

***************
Eight out of ten voices in my head prefer Whiskers.
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 7:44 AM

MSG


SBDB- I'm really straight forward and would just straight up ask him to go out with me ,so you may need to adjust this to your comfort level, but I'd suggest a "next step" like. bringing up a really good movie and asking him what kinds of movies he likes and is he thinking of seeing it?? That hints to him that you are open to a date that includes him. However, if he's really shy, he's probably too insecure or shy to ask you at all and if you want to date him, you're likely to need to make the first move. ...so here's a nice first move. Start having a conversation with him. When it gets going really well say " hey I'm really enjoying talking about( whatever topic you're on)with you. Let's go get some coffee so we can keep talking. Then it's not a case of let's get all romantic I love you big boy. Just a casual going someplace and having fun. If it goes well, then say " hey we should do this more often, or maybe even go to dinner or something. I really like spending time with you."

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 7:51 AM

SMARTBUTDUMBBLONDE


thank you, msg, I couldnot do what you would do, I am really shy when comes to stuff like that, and I have the biggest fear of rejection!!
I think I am going to try one of your suggestions, but it may take me a while to work up to it.

Anyway, got to go to a 6th form evening at my school. Kinda pointless really, since I really want ot go to SJD, but I do need a safety net!

oH, BTW, I won't be coming on Haven anymore: I'm not allowed in chat rooms, so if someone could delete me or something, that would be great.

***************
Eight out of ten voices in my head prefer Whiskers.
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 7:52 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Sounds good to a point. If he's usually an ass to others chances are he might be a game player. Guys who are asses most of the time usually get real nice when theres something they want. Which may not be all that bad, just make sure you want it too.

ADD: I forgot to say that if he seems allright, just pull a 13 and tell him you are interested in seeing him. Nothin' gets my goat worse than folks who can't just say what they need to say. It would probably be good to make sure the rapport between both of you is good before doing this. But like i mentioned to 13, what more can you get but to be told No. And if he's a mean hearted bastard and pulls any crap he'll have an entire army of folks to deal with. Distance matters not to the ways of the righteous.

More Adds to brighten my muddled mood:


Sure makes me smile. PsychoBilly and BabyV.

VERONICA

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 8:00 AM

ZEEK


Quote:

Originally posted by Smartbutdumbblonde:
ok, here is my thing:

There is a boy in my science class, who I have never really talked to before, but just recently, we have started talking, which has developed into some major flirting. And if its just casual, run of the mill, then I am a donkey - I never seen him act like this around other girls. he's nice too, and sweet, to me anyway, he's a bit of an ass to most other people.
but, he's really far out of my regualar friendship group, and I have no idea what to do.
So here is my question:
Do I take it a step further(please insert next step here,I'm new at this), and risk making a fool of myself, or listen to my fear of rejection and do nothing, keep it as it is (which is fun), and maybe let him make the first move? Which I'm leaning towards at the moment.
what do you think?


I just see warning flags basically. He's a bit of an ass to other people. Bad sign. He's realy far out of your regular friendship group. Also not good. Can you explain what you like about him? If it's the nice and sweet to you part...well I wouldn't trust that to last if his nature is to be an ass. The part where he isn't someone you'd normally be friends with doesn't bode well for getting along with him.

Then again I'm super picky. So, if you're not then go for it. If you don't want to flat out ask him out then just invite him to something you're already doing with some other friends (if they're ok with it). That should tip him off that you're interested in spending more time with him. If he goes then make an effort to show him a lot of attention. If he doesn't go...well he's probably not interested.

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 8:04 AM

TRISTAN


Hello, again!
This has turned into another busy, exciting day IRL. I can hardly contain my excitement...

MSG, sorry...did not mean to derail your train of thought. Looks like you were already headed that way with the Johnny Depp thing, though.

FMF! Long time, no type! Sounds like you've been busy, though.

Mavourneen, FMF nailed it.
"Johnny played guitar, Jenny played bass.
Name of the band is The Human Race.
Everybody tell me have you heard? Pop goes the world!"

RugBug, titilation good! Very healthy and very appreciated!

I agree with NVG on the flirting thing (Morning, by the way!). I hate hearing that "How much do you love me?", or worse "If you love me, you'll..."
You're number 1! And now you have a pistol as your sig...they should be very worried!

SBDB, I would prefer "will" rather than "not"!
I have the same problem with forgetting my bra all the time.

As to your query...give it a bit of time, see if the flirting turns into 'serious' talking. Then maybe you can see the real person and decide if you want to pursue it further.

NVG, amen to what MSG said. I'll be beside MSG to help with the dragging through the streets thing.



______________________________________

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 8:26 AM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"


*nods to FMF*
Missed ya, lady. Nice to see ya around again.

My take on CMH's statements is that he is refering to "institutionalized manipulation". (sorry for the 3rd person reference but I think he's moved on). The friend and the girl were behaving after the manner in which society has shaped their behaviors. Not sayin' we have no will, but in a social setting with strangers present autopilot takes over; this is more famously refered to as etiquette. I do believe we've drifted far from the "polite society" of old.

On the other hand, did he tuck the 50 in the waistband of her undergarment whilst she was dancing? Was the friend really expecting "something" in return for his generosity?

Quote:

Orignally posted by ghostrider
But there is nothin' sexy about an angry sweaty guy. Is there?


Is he wearing anything?
Brings the thought to mind, ladies: we're getting a feel (sorry) for what we all think about the frillies, but what about the boxer/brief/commando question about guys and their stuff (sorry)? Pretty sure this is where Traveler was headed...

About the flirting, harmless is good unless you have an SO that is threatened by it. But harmless tends to escalate so you gotta figure out how to modulate. At some point someone gets uncomfortable for reasons already mentioned and then it gets awkward. ('Pologies to DTH for even delving into (sorry) her status in the first place. Please speak to me.) We're all generally comfy here and have watchdogs in the wings to guard against untoward behavior.

Hi to Zeek, SBDB, Tristan, all the rest out there right now. Hard to tell sometimes...

"Well, here I am."


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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 8:36 AM

CHRISMOORHEAD


apparently, most of the people here have a problem with me using the word "manipulation" to describe what I saw transpire. Fine, I withdraw that particular word, and whatever word the masses have decided would be more correct, I have no qualms with.

I'm not arguing vocabulary here.

While I'm glad to see at least one person, Tristan, agreed with me on my provided example, I'm shocked that so many people are defending it. None of you think that this girl using her looks to get free money is wrong on any level? I've been friends with this guy for over 7 years and he's never offered to just give me $50, and I sure as hell would never expect him to. I would have had more respect for her if she STOLE it from him, because at least then she would have put forth some sort of effort to obtain it.

Maybe it's a difference of where we live and how we were raised, but I was taught to earn my pay. Charity's for the handicapped.

[IMG]
"Pain is your friend, it is your ally. It will keep you awake, and angry, and remind you to finish the mission and get the hell home. But you know the best thing about pain? It let's you know that you're not dead yet."

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 8:40 AM

CHRISMOORHEAD


Quote:

Originally posted by Smartbutdumbblonde:
ok, here is my thing:

There is a boy in my science class, who I have never really talked to before, but just recently, we have started talking, which has developed into some major flirting. And if its just casual, run of the mill, then I am a donkey - I never seen him act like this around other girls. he's nice too, and sweet, to me anyway, he's a bit of an ass to most other people.
but, he's really far out of my regualar friendship group, and I have no idea what to do.
So here is my question:
Do I take it a step further(please insert next step here,I'm new at this), and risk making a fool of myself, or listen to my fear of rejection and do nothing, keep it as it is (which is fun), and maybe let him make the first move? Which I'm leaning towards at the moment.
what do you think?



Watch how he interacts with other people. If he's a jerk to most of them like you're saying, it's only a matter of time before he begins acting the same way towards you. Right now, you're new, so you're novelty. Once that wears off he'll be having all manner of fun at your expense.

[IMG]
"Pain is your friend, it is your ally. It will keep you awake, and angry, and remind you to finish the mission and get the hell home. But you know the best thing about pain? It let's you know that you're not dead yet."

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 8:40 AM

MSG


NV- OMG they are soooooooo cute. How do you ever leave for work with such sweetie pies at home. Oh I'd be tempted to send my sister to go play in traffic if it meant I could get my hands on such sweet munchkins as those.

Tristan- yup we'll just have to beat her down if she screws up again and hurts him...I will say if the woman is too stupid to see what a fantastic guy NV is, then she deserves the pitiful exisitance she will likely have

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 9:02 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


I'm learning a few things through the Rez' pipeline about her. Prefer not to make any judgements yet, but I will reveal my findings at a later time.

As for the kids, sure they're cute. I just have no idea where they got it from. Poor PsychoBilly has problems with his teeth due to being on the bottle too long. Feel so bad for him because the gorram clinic here is so slow with dental help. Might be looking for a provider through Medicaid. BabyV is just a cutey. She's been crying herself to sleep at night though. It's really starting to bother me. Its like she's fighting her sleep so hard that she'd do anything to stay awake. But I'd seen several infants go through a stage like this so I really ain't too worried. Allright, done rambling on about the kids. I need to be pointed toward someone who can make smaller Jayne-like hats. Its already cold so why not.

VERONICA

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 9:07 AM

MSG


NV- yeah bottle mouth is bad. Oh I know lots of babies who go through the fighting sleep like it was death stage and it hurts your heart when they cry so pitifully... Try putting a drop of warmed to skin temperature cooking oil in each ear. If she stops crying, it means she has a minor ear inflamation and the pressure of fluid build up at night is hurting her. Otherwise, just hang in... you're going to be such a good daddy:)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 9:10 AM

TRISTAN


Afternoon, JQ!

CMH, putting it that way, where she used her looks to get money, yes, I see that as manipulation. I think that is where you were going with this, so that's what I based my statement on...and you did verify that is what happened. Now, had she just been talking to someone else and making a general statement and your friend just offered out of the blue, I would still take the stance of generosity/chivalry.
Manipulation in the first case is a good description. I think the problem comes in seeing all things of this type as manipulation. There are varying degrees of this, as pointed out by my esteemed colleagues...it's just not always black and white.
Thank you for making me think, though!

MSG, a beat down can be arranged.



______________________________________

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 9:14 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Well folks. I'm out for lunch. I will have BabySis try the oil thing when she gets to cryin' like that again.

See y'all in a bit.

VERONICA

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 9:19 AM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"


Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:
apparently, most of the people here have a problem with me using the word "manipulation" to describe what I saw transpire. Fine, I withdraw that particular word, and whatever word the masses have decided would be more correct, I have no qualms with.

I'm not arguing vocabulary here.

While I'm glad to see at least one person, Tristan, agreed with me on my provided example, I'm shocked that so many people are defending it. None of you think that this girl using her looks to get free money is wrong on any level? I've been friends with this guy for over 7 years and he's never offered to just give me $50, and I sure as hell would never expect him to. I would have had more respect for her if she STOLE it from him, because at least then she would have put forth some sort of effort to obtain it.

Maybe it's a difference of where we live and how we were raised, but I was taught to earn my pay. Charity's for the handicapped.

"Pain is your friend, it is your ally. It will keep you awake, and angry, and remind you to finish the mission and get the hell home. But you know the best thing about pain? It let's you know that you're not dead yet."



It seems to me that the concept of Fun sadly may be far from your experience, CMH. Like you, I think the argument you make is not about the word. It's about the situation.

I understand that the fairer sex (feminists attack! ) has an easier time of it when it comes to getting their way. My issue with your issue is that she didn't ask your friend for anything. And even if she did, he most certainly could have left the money in his (perhaps momentarily too tight) pants.

"Maybe it's a difference of where we live and how we were raised, but I was taught to earn my pay. Charity's a Virtue above all others."

"Well, here I am."


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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 9:24 AM

RUGBUG


Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:
While I'm glad to see at least one person, Tristan, agreed with me on my provided example, I'm shocked that so many people are defending it. None of you think that this girl using her looks to get free money is wrong on any level? I've been friends with this guy for over 7 years and he's never offered to just give me $50, and I sure as hell would never expect him to. I would have had more respect for her if she STOLE it from him, because at least then she would have put forth some sort of effort to obtain it.



CMH: Nothing you posted made it sound like she was using her looks to get the money. That's why I said that nuances might have been lost. If she purposefully played up her looks or tried to arouse him to get him to give her money, then, yeah, I have a problem with that.

If, however, she was just being her pretty self and talking to friends and a guy decides to give her money? That's his problem, not her's.

And just to add something to ponder: What's the difference between a man using an imposing presence, physical or otherwise, to get what he wants and a woman using her wiles to get what she wants? You've told stories of how you've used a threatening presence to "manipulate" others. IMO, you're doing the exact same thing as a woman who uses her sexuality (as opposed to a man seeing a woman as a sexual being...first is her actions, second is his).

Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:
Maybe it's a difference of where we live and how we were raised, but I was taught to earn my pay. Charity's for the handicapped.



Wow, that's an offensive comment.



***************
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 9:34 AM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"


Oooooh, RugBug. Great point. Manipulation, or whatever we've decided to call it, is what it is, whether it be the Threat of Violence or the Promise of Sex. Not having familiarized myself with all of your posts, CMH, I cannot ponder your history, beyond just a few entries. Is what RugBug says true?

"Well, here I am."


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