Imponderables: Dancy Puppet Heart Strings by nvghostrider

Quote:
Originally posted by MSB:
Just whatever you do...do NOT bail her out. Nothing is worse for friends or family than someone who continuously bails them out. They have to hit bottom and learn or they will never ever learn to stand on their own

ok that was my little rant.

Hmmmm what do you consider bailing out? For instance there's a browncoat night at a minor league baseball game coming up and I know she's a fan so I asked her if she wanted to come along. She said she couldn't afford it and I was all "I'll buy your ticket if you want". Bailing out or just being nice? I don't consider the ticket to be a major expense.

But no I wouldn't be offering any sort of large sums of money to pay off debt or anything. I'm not giving up spending the money on myself so that someone else can go blow their money on ipods and junk just to live off my savings.

So, that sorta leads to another ponder this friend has brought up in my mind. Do any of you guys consider another person's debt a problem for relationships? I'm not interested in her romantically, but I've thought what if I was and I found out later that she's in a bunch of debt and if we got married she'd just demolish my credit and suck up all my savings paying off her debt. I'd be pretty upset about it I think. It would really depend on when I found out I guess. If I'd been dating her for a long time and fell head over heels by the time I found out about the debt then I don't know what I'd do.

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Thursday, May 15, 2008 12:42 PM

Yeah I consider money management a deal breaker. Not in the you have to make as much or more money than me, but if someone's completely irresponsible with money like that girl, it makes you worry. What if you got involved, but her debt kept you from getting a house. What if you had a joint account and she drained it to buy clothes right before you were about to do something important that you'd agreed on ( happened to my cousin. His wife ( now ex) cleaned out their bank account to buy a bunch of nice clothes and that meant they couldn't go on a cruise they'd been planning ( and he'd been saving for) for a year.
I also wouldn't count minor stuff like they were stretched to their limit. If they pay bills before pleasure 90% of the time or they at least are mindful of bills and are careful with their spending habits then I don't think it's too big a deal. I wouldn't even count it if they'd made mistakes in the past they were still cleaning up. As long as they have a decent sense of responsibility ( because that's really what money management is...being grown up enough to put required before pleasure) then it's all good... ok this was a much longer answer than I meant it to be

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Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Friday, May 16, 2008 4:16 AM

SPACEANJL

Finances are the major deal, I agree. People have to take responsibility for their actions, and accept consequences. If someone always bails them out, they will just do it again.

Slight digression on the subjetc of money -

Now I'm in a sitch where my husband is supporting me at present, while I try and write. This is fabulous, but I am feeling a little guilty, and am going to look at getting something at least part-time so we have some extra holiday money. Point is, first time in my life where I am reliant on someone else's money, and it's very weird. Previously, I've either been totally self-reliant, or, one horrible time, in a relationship where money = power in partner's eyes, ie 'I earn more, so I make the decisions.'

So, am I being selfish in letting husband look after me? (He insisted, after my last workplace got uber-weird.) Maybe some part of me feels like I'm betraying some feminist principle by indulging my inner Nigella half the time, and my inner Christie the rest.

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Friday, May 16, 2008 4:31 AM

I totally agree that the poor money management thing is a lack of responsibility. The girl needs to grow up at some point. Bah!

SpaceAnJL, I don't see that as a problem at all. You two are working together to achieve your goals. That's what it's all about right? I mean the plan is for this to only be temporary right? If you can get a writing career going then you'll be bringing in your own income soon enough. Nothing wrong with needing some time to get the ball rolling.

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Friday, May 16, 2008 5:49 AM

Good morning folks.

Woke up early to the rhone going off. Though it was the alarm but it was actually a loan company calling early (we've traded messages for weeks now) saying they've chopped off a few hundred dollars from my account an I can pay them off today. YAY!!!

HUGS for MSB and her wonderful breakfast and being the BEST.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night. -Edgar Allan Poe

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Friday, May 16, 2008 6:11 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by nvghostrider:
Woke up early to the rhone going off. Though it was the alarm but it was actually a loan company calling early (we've traded messages for weeks now) saying they've chopped off a few hundred dollars from my account an I can pay them off today. YAY!!!

Congrats! Gotta love that feeling of getting a loan paid off.

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Friday, May 16, 2008 6:17 AM

mornin' Imponderables.

Yeah, being in debt isn't fun.

Happy Friday all. Hugs and chocolate to them that wants 'em.

*snuggles MsB*

~jimi
Lt. Alexander - Chief Medic / XO Alpha Co. / Logistics & Transportation Specialist - 76th IAB

Was your mom a flaming sword swallower? We could use somebody to replace Donut.

Is she a mean girl, or a regular girl?
Caboose, what did I tell you?
That there are no regular girls.
Exactly.

xBox 360 GamerTag: Swinger420

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Friday, May 16, 2008 6:50 AM

Morning all... Anjl there is nothing at all wrong with you staying home. I'm betting you're doing all the cooking,cleaning errands, etc and that's a whole lot of work and a major contribution to your family...so don't say you don't work. Plus you're a full time writer on top of all that so I'd say as long as it works for you...it works:)

NV hey it's my fault I thought that was the phone alarm, but it's still good you finally got through and all... and (yes I know this is mushy just try to deal ...giggle) you're the uberbest:)

HUGS Jimi

____________________________________________

Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Friday, May 16, 2008 9:12 AM

Wow. Busy morning. Actually I'm uniform shopping (need a few items other than what the Colonel offers) and have found nearly everything. Waiting for approval on the boots though. Seems the Battalion suppliers lack the capacity to outfit a 16 wide.

Stupid feet.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night. -Edgar Allan Poe

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Friday, May 16, 2008 10:15 AM

Hey you have nice feet... nice big feet..... ( yes DTH it's true)

____________________________________________

Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Saturday, May 17, 2008 5:55 AM

bumpin for the weekend

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Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Saturday, May 17, 2008 8:41 AM

looks like MSB and NV are takin over the thread, i'll have to put a stop to that :-P

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Saturday, May 17, 2008 9:56 AM

*joins tex's quest to take over the thread for ourselves* ^_^

#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#\/#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#

\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/$$\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature.

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Saturday, May 17, 2008 12:01 PM

lol yes, we will be triumphant :-P haha

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Saturday, May 17, 2008 12:44 PM

We could start another thread, and then dominate it ^_^

because I like the way this emoticon looks with my avatar and my sig ^_^

#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#\/#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#

\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/$$\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature.

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Saturday, May 17, 2008 1:23 PM

lol. does look quite shiny. like the new avatar ;)

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Saturday, May 17, 2008 2:03 PM

Thankee, Mobbex made it for me ^_^

#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#\/#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#

\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/$$\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature.

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Sunday, May 18, 2008 7:45 AM

very perty ^_^ i wish i could make avatars :-\ and sigs. dont have much luck with fancy sigs.

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Sunday, May 18, 2008 7:55 AM

If you want a change, I could do it for you

Just give me pics you want to use, any writing you want, and a general layout of how you want things, and I could do that for you ^_^

#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#\/#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#

\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/$$\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature.

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Sunday, May 18, 2008 2:50 PM

Nice try little ones....but I'm a great deal more evil than you both...giggle

Ok long weeknd, but a lot accomplished....

____________________________________________

Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Monday, May 19, 2008 3:12 AM

mornin' Imponderables.

MsB, evilness doesn't matter, if they are the ones doing the posting, then they have taken over the thread. Seems like the rest of us weren't around this weekend.

*snuggles MsB*

~jimi
Lt. Alexander - Chief Medic / XO Alpha Co. / Logistics & Transportation Specialist - 76th IAB

Was your mom a flaming sword swallower? We could use somebody to replace Donut.

Is she a mean girl, or a regular girl?
Caboose, what did I tell you?
That there are no regular girls.
Exactly.

xBox 360 GamerTag: Swinger420

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Monday, May 19, 2008 4:00 AM

Well, we could hardly do anything else, seeing as we have no real lives, now could we?

#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#\/#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#

\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/$$\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature.

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Monday, May 19, 2008 5:27 AM

Good morning.

No real lives?

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night. -Edgar Allan Poe

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Monday, May 19, 2008 6:12 AM

At least, I don't. Can't really speak for tex....

#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#\/#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#

\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/$$\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature.

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Monday, May 19, 2008 10:06 AM

SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEILAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
No! Sheila! Sheila!! who's sheila?
She was the nice lady in the tank. *sob* she was my friend.
Dude! i KNEW you could pick up chicks in a tank!

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Monday, May 19, 2008 10:22 AM

LOL

OK I'm not even teaching and I am still feeling the teacher drain... end of the year I just want it to be over...weird ??

____________________________________________

Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Monday, May 19, 2008 10:29 AM

lol ^_^

MSB, it's not weird to want the whole gorram year to be over with. The imagined drain isn't quite a true drain, it's the anticipation of another hellish day. Trust me, I am always right ^_^

#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#\/#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#

\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/$$\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature.

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Monday, May 19, 2008 10:48 AM

im hungry. dad's in the hospital. and its been raining on and off all day. wtf?

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Monday, May 19, 2008 10:52 AM

HUGS FLT I'm sorry sweety..it'll get better though
and do you mind sending that rain my way... it's not rained since I got here

HUGS LF

____________________________________________

Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Monday, May 19, 2008 11:00 AM

*sends rain MSB's way* there'na go ^_^
*hugs* the only reason my dad's in this position. again. is because he's stubborn, and he never tells ANYONE when he's not feeling good @_@ one would think after having the complications he's had with his surgery he would listen to his body more often -_-

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Monday, May 19, 2008 4:33 PM

well dad's back home @_@ still doesnt look like he's learned anything about "when you feel sick, tell someone and call a doctor" though -_o

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 5:23 AM

Good morning folks.

Good to hear he's home FLT. All you can do is fuss over him a bit and try getting him comfortable with saying he feels bad. After talking with my Uncle Andrew (he's in his mid 70's) this weekend I know better than to try brushing it off and trying to make myself better. Seems he'd known too many old timers thst did that and didn't make it.

As for this evening I'm making dinner and watching Diary Of The Dead (out on DVD today) after cutting out the fox tails in the backyard. Seems the dogs can't stay out of them and it's time to cut and burn.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night. -Edgar Allan Poe

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 5:51 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by LeopardFlan:
Trust me, I am always right ^_^

You too? I never thought I'd find someone who agrees with everything I say. This should be fun.

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 7:13 AM

howdy Imponderables.

*glomps FLT for the Red vs. Blue reference*

I hope you are all having a good day.

*snuggles MsB*

~jimi
Lt. Alexander - Chief Medic / XO Alpha Co. / Logistics & Transportation Specialist - 76th IAB

Was your mom a flaming sword swallower? We could use somebody to replace Donut.

Is she a mean girl, or a regular girl?
Caboose, what did I tell you?
That there are no regular girls.
Exactly.

xBox 360 GamerTag: Swinger420

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 7:14 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Zeek:
Quote:
Originally posted by LeopardFlan:
Trust me, I am always right ^_^

You too? I never thought I'd find someone who agrees with everything I say. This should be fun.

This will be fun. We won't have to depend on communications systems for us to plan how to take over the world, cause we'll already know what's right

#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#\/#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#

\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/$$\~~~*~~^~~*~~~/
98% of teens have smoked pot, if you are one of the 2% that haven't, copy this into your signature.

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 9:08 AM

NV
( isn't he just the sweetest)
Sadly our two seriously dumb dogs cannot stay out of this huge clump of foxtails so they come back inside with tons of the little burrs which I end up picking out..argh

OK LOL we had a fire drill and I was so involved in work ( alarm is not very loud) I didn't notice until they'd cut the power. I was the last out of the building by a good 3 minutes...ooops

HUGS Jimi

Ok must go get lunch to improve my attentiveness

____________________________________________

Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 9:26 AM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE

For the first time today, I called in sick not because I'm too sick to work or because I'm contagious, but because I can't handle the drive today, with my joints in their current state.

I hate everything today. *kicks something and slumps out of the room*

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 11:42 AM

:-( Sorry to hear that CK. Hopefully things will turn around soon. At least you can spend some of the time at home soaking up the sun. You've said that seems to help right?

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 2:09 PM

Yes MSB, he sure is ^_^

*fixes gravity drive CK kicked and rushes out of the room after her(?)* *gets her some tea, soup, pillows, and a blanket and orders her onto the couch*

Quote:
Originally posted by NVGhostRider: Good to hear he's home FLT. All you can do is fuss over him a bit and try getting him comfortable with saying he feels bad. After talking with my Uncle Andrew (he's in his mid 70's) this weekend I know better than to try brushing it off and trying to make myself better. Seems he'd known too many old timers thst did that and didn't make it.

yeah he seems to be doin better today. try telling HIM not to put things off though @_@ he won't listen to anybody, it's his stubborn way -_@

Quote:
Originally posted by RiverIsMyGoddess: *glomps FLT for the Red vs. Blue reference*

*glomps back* sooooo many situations in the college atmosphere that warrant RvB references. and my friends and i take advantage of ALL of them

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 2:45 PM

HUGS Ck hope the joints improve.

ok I have got to get sleep tonight ...my cranky factor is a +10

____________________________________________

Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008 3:16 PM

uh oh *gives you anti-cranky meds* (its um...hot chocolate ^_^)

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008 4:31 AM

mornin' Imponderables.

I wish I had gotten into RvB in college, I have just recently seen all of them. I love the "previously on Red vs. Blue" part from the season 5 DVDs.

*snuggles MsB*

~jimi
Lt. Alexander - Chief Medic / XO Alpha Co. / Logistics & Transportation Specialist - 76th IAB

Was your mom a flaming sword swallower? We could use somebody to replace Donut.

Is she a mean girl, or a regular girl?
Caboose, what did I tell you?
That there are no regular girls.
Exactly.

xBox 360 GamerTag: Swinger420

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008 5:36 AM

Ponderers!

*hugs*

That's all I got.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night. -Edgar Allan Poe

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008 6:46 AM

Morning all...

Ah feeling much better with a nice evening, wonderful meal cooked for me by a super sweet and wonderful man

NV and a good nights sleep and a great wake up this morning...

HUGS to all

HUGS Jimi...

Ok weird ponder for all... what do you think shows love more 1-the little thoughtful things like noticing when someone's upset or doing something nice and simple for them or 2- the grand romantic gesture like a dozen roses and a big celebration??

Personally I think it's the little things that really show how you feel.

____________________________________________

Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008 8:14 AM

Little things.

~jimi
Lt. Alexander - Chief Medic / XO Alpha Co. / Logistics & Transportation Specialist - 76th IAB

Was your mom a flaming sword swallower? We could use somebody to replace Donut.

Is she a mean girl, or a regular girl?
Caboose, what did I tell you?
That there are no regular girls.
Exactly.

xBox 360 GamerTag: Swinger420

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008 8:27 AM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE

Update: Yup, still hate everything. -_-

On the ponder: I think you need a healthy combo of both. Hubby is really good about doing lots of little things, but every now and then it's nice to get flowers or be surprised by something intricate he's planned. I don't think you should rely on just one or the other, but the little things add up to more in the end, IMO.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008 10:31 AM

HUGS CK oh sweety... has anything else gone wrong or is it the same stuff??

ah so you are going with laconic Jimi??

____________________________________________

Ain't Love GRAND!!!

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008 10:41 AM

I would say both, yeah, but the little things count for much more. If there's a guy that only does big things, forget him, he's just a lazy a**. It's easier to do a big thing and forget about it, than it is to do a bunch of little things.

#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#\/#~%~~*~~~&~~~*~~%~#

Stan: LF! Stuffed LF!
Stan: That didn't sound right.. sorry. I'm not some psycho taxidermist serial killer or anything.

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Wednesday, May 21, 2008 10:45 AM