GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

THE ANSWER TO THE QUESTION YOU ALL BEEN ASKING!

POSTED BY: DARKHOOD
UPDATED: Saturday, May 29, 2004 11:59
SHORT URL:
VIEWED: 7770
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Sunday, May 16, 2004 1:14 AM

DARKHOOD


A Condom 500 years in the future will be called a Spondom.

________________________________________________________________________

Mal's on the ground, about to get speared by Crow. A shot rings out. Crow is kneecapped.

Mal: Nice shot.

Jayne: I was aiming for his head.

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 2:04 AM

ZOID



DarkHood:

Umm... okay...

On a side note, you should stop leaving your drink unattended when you go to the loo.


Respectfully,

zoid

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 2:52 AM

LADYPANDORA


Quote:

Originally posted by DarkHood:
A Condom 500 years in the future will be called a Spondom.




Because it's a space condom, I take it? Just like a llama in the future will be a Spllama.

"Oh my god. What can it be? We're all doomed! Who's flying this thing!?...Oh right, that would be me. Back to work."

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 3:33 AM

WHOODAHN


I really don't want to know what you did last night that made you think of that.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 4:09 AM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!


Yes, because everyone knows that by putting the word 'space' in front of just about anything automatically makes it seem all futuristic and super cool. Like.....space monkey

" They don't like it when you shoot at 'em. I worked that out myself. "

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 4:35 AM

YORKY


The makers of Spam were way ahead of their time.

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 4:37 AM

GUNHAND


But Space Monkeys are cool!

Although I think the proper term is Spmonkey.

Which sounds like it should be a word in Lithuanian. Freaky.





~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"Oh hey, I got an idea. Instead of us hanging
around playing art critic till I get pinched by
the Man, how's about we move away from this
eerie-ass piece of work and get on with our
increasingly eerie-ass day, how's that?"

My eerie-ass website:
http://gunhandsfirefly.homestead.com/Index.html

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 4:56 AM

JERSEYBROWNCOAT


Someone remind me what an "utnik" was before it went into space?

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 5:07 AM

GUNHAND


Quote:

Originally posted by JerseyBrowncoat:
Someone remind me what an "utnik" was before it went into space?



It was a small yet entrancing growth which resembled Anne Murray that Stalin had removed from his knee and kept in a jar of alcohol. Unfortunately it kept growing and growing at a prodigious rate, soon outstripping the weak Soviet era glass of the containment jar until finally the only solution was to attach an egg timer to it and launch it into space.

This astonishing fact was only finally made public in 1999 (which is 666 upside down with a 1 in front of it!) when the KGB opened their secret files to intrepid reporters for "The Paper" which is also known by those without subscriptions as the Weekly World News.



~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"Oh hey, I got an idea. Instead of us hanging
around playing art critic till I get pinched by
the Man, how's about we move away from this
eerie-ass piece of work and get on with our
increasingly eerie-ass day, how's that?"

My eerie-ass website:
http://gunhandsfirefly.homestead.com/Index.html

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 5:58 AM

WHOODAHN


Quote:

Originally posted by JerseyBrowncoat:
Someone remind me what an "utnik" was before it went into space?



I think it's related to the 'astic' and 'asim' family of genetic mutations.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 6:03 AM

WHOODAHN


Quote:

Originally posted by Gunhand:
It was a small yet entrancing growth which resembled Anne Murray that Stalin had removed from his knee and kept in a jar of alcohol. Unfortunately it kept growing and growing at a prodigious rate, soon outstripping the weak Soviet era glass of the containment jar until finally the only solution was to attach an egg timer to it and launch it into space.

This astonishing fact was only finally made public in 1999 (which is 666 upside down with a 1 in front of it!) when the KGB opened their secret files to intrepid reporters for "The Paper" which is also known by those without subscriptions as the Weekly World News.



The artist formerly known as Prince and currently known as Prince, sang a duet with Anne Murray in Russia, I believe they sang 1999. It didn't make sense at the time but I see the connection now.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 6:10 AM

BIKISDAD


Isn't SPAM just short for SPAce Monkey?

"That'll put marzipan on your pie plate, bingo!"

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 6:16 AM

GUNHAND


Quote:

Originally posted by WhooDahn:
Quote:

Originally posted by Gunhand:
It was a small yet entrancing growth which resembled Anne Murray that Stalin had removed from his knee and kept in a jar of alcohol. Unfortunately it kept growing and growing at a prodigious rate, soon outstripping the weak Soviet era glass of the containment jar until finally the only solution was to attach an egg timer to it and launch it into space.

This astonishing fact was only finally made public in 1999 (which is 666 upside down with a 1 in front of it!) when the KGB opened their secret files to intrepid reporters for "The Paper" which is also known by those without subscriptions as the Weekly World News.



The artist formerly known as Prince and currently known as Prince, sang a duet with Anne Murray in Russia, I believe they sang 1999. It didn't make sense at the time but I see the connection now.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"



It's all about connecting the dots...

*nods sagely*

I mean there are some people who belives Unknown Armies is fiction, but little do they know of the terrors of the Scottish Restaurant Conspiracy.



I believe SPAM is Space Ham though, but that too is one of the mysteries of the universe. I'd say more but...I don't want the Men In Black to show up. Not Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones, they'd be kind of cool to hang out with on an otherwise slow day, but the real ones. The Real Ones.

*puts on his foil hat and taps the side of his nose*

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"Oh hey, I got an idea. Instead of us hanging
around playing art critic till I get pinched by
the Man, how's about we move away from this
eerie-ass piece of work and get on with our
increasingly eerie-ass day, how's that?"

My eerie-ass website:
http://gunhandsfirefly.homestead.com/Index.html

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 6:17 AM

YORKY


Quote:

Originally posted by bikisdad:
Isn't SPAM just short for SPAce Monkey?



I always wondered what it was made out of.

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 8:53 AM

BENDIS


I thought everyone knew that SPAM was a combination of ham, space monkey and an unidentifiable gellatinous goo? Must just be me.

----------
"We're not gonna die. We can't die, Bendis.
You know why? Because we are so very pretty. We are just too pretty for God to let us die. Huh? Look at that chiseled jaw."

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 11:39 AM

INSIGHT SPINNER


Quote:

Originally posted by Bendis:
I thought everyone knew that SPAM was a combination of ham, space monkey and an unidentifiable gellatinous goo? Must just be me.

----------
"We're not gonna die. We can't die, Bendis.
You know why? Because we are so very pretty. We are just too pretty for God to let us die. Huh? Look at that chiseled jaw."



That goo would be dessicated spit. And, FYI, spit predates the sp... convention, so it's just spit, but they collect it from spuns (space nuns) and women living in sppurdah (that would be space harems.)

insight spinner
__________

Just an object. It doesn't mean what you think....

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 12:07 PM

BADGERSHAT


Quote:

Originally posted by DarkHood:
A Condom 500 years in the future will be called a Spondom.





Well, thank god, I was starting to get worried...

--Jefé The Hat

***************************
"I like smackin 'em"--Jayne

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 12:25 PM

EBONEZER


Oh i get it now! Those stupid worthless little spork things came from space.



-----------------------------------
We do the hard thespian, so you don't have to.

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 12:37 PM

METROPOLIS


SPAM is an acronym for Specially Pressed American Meat, and was initially created to ship to Europe during and after WWII.

Haha about sporks and sputnik! The spork think is porbably true (does anyone know who actually invented them?), but does that mean spoons are also extraterrestrial? I wanna see an Oon.

"Once in flight school, I was laconic..." -Wash

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 12:41 PM

EBONEZER


Quote:

Originally posted by bikisdad:
Isn't SPAM just short for SPAce Monkey?




Eggs, ham, bacon, and spam.
Spam, eggs, sausage and spam.
Spam, eggs, spam, toast, spam and spam.
Spam, spam, spam, eggs and spam.
Spam, spam, spam, spam, eggs, spam and spam.
Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, and spam.

if you look at the word spam for a long time it looks really weird.


-----------------------------------
We do the hard thespian, so you don't have to.

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 12:43 PM

HOWDYROCKERBABY1


Quote:

Originally posted by DarkHood:
A Condom 500 years in the future will be called a Spondom.

________________________________________________________________________

Mal's on the ground, about to get speared by Crow. A shot rings out. Crow is kneecapped.

Mal: Nice shot.

Jayne: I was aiming for his head.



Actually i think its more likely to be a Spcondom kind of like a jew is a Spjew...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
MAL: This is my scrap of nowhere. You go on and find your own.
SAFFRON: You can't just leave me here, on this
lifeless piece of crap moon...
MAL: Sure I can.
SAFFRON: I'll die.
MAL: Well, as a courtesy, you might start
getting busy on that, cause all this chatter ain't doin' me any kindness.

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 12:47 PM

LEAFY


Noooo, Spam was actually short for SPiced hAM.

Specially Pressed American Meat, though, LOL!!! and

Now will somebody come along and tell us what it REALLY stood for back in 1940 something????

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 12:52 PM

HOWDYROCKERBABY1


Quote:

Originally posted by Gunhand:
Quote:

Originally posted by WhooDahn:
Quote:

Originally posted by Gunhand:
It was a small yet entrancing growth which resembled Anne Murray that Stalin had removed from his knee and kept in a jar of alcohol. Unfortunately it kept growing and growing at a prodigious rate, soon outstripping the weak Soviet era glass of the containment jar until finally the only solution was to attach an egg timer to it and launch it into space.

This astonishing fact was only finally made public in 1999 (which is 666 upside down with a 1 in front of it!) when the KGB opened their secret files to intrepid reporters for "The Paper" which is also known by those without subscriptions as the Weekly World News.



The artist formerly known as Prince and currently known as Prince, sang a duet with Anne Murray in Russia, I believe they sang 1999. It didn't make sense at the time but I see the connection now.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"



It's all about connecting the dots...

*nods sagely*

I mean there are some people who belives Unknown Armies is fiction, but little do they know of the terrors of the Scottish Restaurant Conspiracy.



I believe SPAM is Space Ham though, but that too is one of the mysteries of the universe. I'd say more but...I don't want the Men In Black to show up. Not Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones, they'd be kind of cool to hang out with on an otherwise slow day, but the real ones. The Real Ones.

*puts on his foil hat and taps the side of his nose*

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"Oh hey, I got an idea. Instead of us hanging
around playing art critic till I get pinched by
the Man, how's about we move away from this
eerie-ass piece of work and get on with our
increasingly eerie-ass day, how's that?"

My eerie-ass website:
http://gunhandsfirefly.homestead.com/Index.html



Come on people...don't you know anything Spam CLEARLY is an acronym for

Stuff Posing As Meat

i have solved the mystery for you

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
MAL: This is my scrap of nowhere. You go on and find your own.
SAFFRON: You can't just leave me here, on this
lifeless piece of crap moon...
MAL: Sure I can.
SAFFRON: I'll die.
MAL: Well, as a courtesy, you might start
getting busy on that, cause all this chatter ain't doin' me any kindness.

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Sunday, May 16, 2004 1:22 PM

ZOID


Hello, fellow warders:

Very interesting insights, one and all.

Allow me to correct my earlier post: You should all stop leaving your drinks unattended when you go to the loo.

In a related story, posted by Sptimothy Spoleary's Spleen, a massive quantity of d-lysergic acid diethylamide-25 escaped from a laboratory at UC-Berkeley in aerosol form. The large plume was last seen traveling eastward, carried along by the Santa Anas.

That would 'splain it...


Hallucinogenically,

zoid
_________________________________________________

"Even back when, River had that indefinable 'it', y'know? Inquisitive, insightful -- Very focused... Some things never change."

- 'Wash' Warren, Chief Architect and co-proprietor, "Cretaceous Park", Hera; from A Child Shall Lead Them: A History of the Second War of Independence Wilkins, Richard

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Monday, May 17, 2004 12:18 PM

XARR


Quote:

Originally posted by Leafy:
Now will somebody come along and tell us what it REALLY stood for back in 1940 something????



Ask and you shall receive! This is from www.spam.com.

1937: SPAM is born! Originally called HORMEL Spiced Ham, the company holds a contest to create a name as distinctive as the taste. The winner, Kenneth Daigneau, receives the grand prize... $100.

Other important 1937 occurrences: Amelia Earhart, disappears in her attempt to be the first woman to fly around the world; Route 66 is officially completed, total distance: 2,448 miles (that's 39 million cans of SPAM laid end-to-end!); the Golden Gate Bridge open.

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Monday, May 17, 2004 12:29 PM

HOWDYROCKERBABY1


Quote:

Originally posted by Xarr:
Quote:

Originally posted by Leafy:
Now will somebody come along and tell us what it REALLY stood for back in 1940 something????



Ask and you shall receive! This is from www.spam.com.

1937: SPAM is born! Originally called HORMEL Spiced Ham, the company holds a contest to create a name as distinctive as the taste. The winner, Kenneth Daigneau, receives the grand prize... $100.

Other important 1937 occurrences: Amelia Earhart, disappears in her attempt to be the first woman to fly around the world; Route 66 is officially completed, total distance: 2,448 miles (that's 39 million cans of SPAM laid end-to-end!); the Golden Gate Bridge open.



I still like mine better... i'm going to go pout now...



~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
MAL: This is my scrap of nowhere. You go on and find your own.
SAFFRON: You can't just leave me here, on this
lifeless piece of crap moon...
MAL: Sure I can.
SAFFRON: I'll die.
MAL: Well, as a courtesy, you might start
getting busy on that, cause all this chatter ain't doin' me any kindness.

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Monday, May 17, 2004 12:35 PM

XARR


Oh I think, with out a doubt, that yours is FAR more accurate. I imagine Hormel's ad execs had quite the fun time coming up with a name for their "heavily-processed-meat-type-food-stuffs", hence the naming contest. I think you should write to Hormel and demand your $100, for your highly superior name.

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Monday, May 17, 2004 4:41 PM

ANNIK


Quote:

Originally posted by Xarr:
Oh I think, with out a doubt, that yours is FAR more accurate. I imagine Hormel's ad execs had quite the fun time coming up with a name for their "heavily-processed-meat-type-food-stuffs", hence the naming contest. I think you should write to Hormel and demand your $100, for your highly superior name.



Ah ... the ugly old bad days. I remember when the makers of TANG were bragging in commercials that it was the stuff astronauts drank in space.

I finally got to taste the stuff when I was about six ... and I thought: "Poor astronauts!"

Cheers,
Annik
... my sister's a ship. We had a complicated childhood.

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Monday, May 17, 2004 5:58 PM

WHOODAHN


Quote:


Actually i think its more likely to be a Spcondom kind of like a jew is a Spjew...



Riddle me this,

Why aren't Jew and Sioux spelled the same?

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"

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Monday, May 17, 2004 6:00 PM

WHOODAHN


Quote:


Ah ... the ugly old bad days. I remember when the makers of TANG were bragging in commercials that it was the stuff astronauts drank in space.



Does TANG stand for This Ain't No Good?

I love using double negatives.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"

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Monday, May 17, 2004 6:08 PM

CAGEYBEE


just a guess, but different origins and/or nationalities?

edit- this is in reference to the jew vs. sioux argument...i haven't entirely figured out how to use the quotes from previous posts. too busy trying to think of how to be clever. you people are hard to keep up with.

me

~Mal- "how drunk was i last night?"
~Jayne- "i don't know. i passed out."

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Monday, May 17, 2004 6:23 PM

WHOODAHN


Quote:

too busy trying to think of how to be clever.


Is that Ward, Wally or Beaver?

Sorry, I couldn't pass that one up.

If you don't know who they are, then just call me an old fart and shake your head.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"

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Monday, May 17, 2004 6:30 PM

NEROLI


Quote:

Originally posted by WhooDahn:
Quote:

too busy trying to think of how to be clever.


Is that Ward, Wally or Beaver?

Sorry, I couldn't pass that one up.

If you don't know who they are, then just call me an old fart and shake your head.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"



Can we call you an old fart and shake our heads if we do know who they are and actually got the joke?

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Monday, May 17, 2004 7:30 PM

CAGEYBEE


i'm with neroli on this one

as a child, i was subject to many hours of tvland (thanks, dad!), but i still have the incessant need to make fun of people.

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 5:13 AM

SBWATCHER


ok, how 'bout spumoni?

"What's sanguine mean again?"

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 5:15 AM

SBWATCHER


Quote:

Originally posted by Xarr:
Quote:

Originally posted by Leafy:
Now will somebody come along and tell us what it REALLY stood for back in 1940 something????



Ask and you shall receive! This is from www.spam.com.

1937: SPAM is born! Originally called HORMEL Spiced Ham, the company holds a contest to create a name as distinctive as the taste. The winner, Kenneth Daigneau, receives the grand prize... $100.

Other important 1937 occurrences: Amelia Earhart, disappears in her attempt to be the first woman to fly around the world; Route 66 is officially completed, total distance: 2,448 miles (that's 39 million cans of SPAM laid end-to-end!); the Golden Gate Bridge open.



According to yourDictionary.com:

Spam - A trademark used for a canned meat product consisting primarily of chopped pork (aka monkey) pressed into a loaf.

"What's sanguine mean again?"

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 5:26 AM

ELWOODMOM


This thread is funny! A little sick, but funny!

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 5:39 AM

XARR


Quote:

Originally posted by SBWatcher:
Spam - A trademark used for a canned meat product consisting primarily of chopped pork (aka monkey) pressed into a loaf.



mmmmmmmmm processed monkey loaf...

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 5:50 AM

SBWATCHER


Quote:

Originally posted by Xarr:
mmmmmmmmm processed monkey loaf...



lmao of @ Xarr

"What's sanguine mean again?"

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 11:15 AM

KNIBBLET


Quote:

Originally posted by ebonezer:
Those stupid worthless little spork things came from space.



I refuse to use the word *****. It is a useless word. The original word for the combination of spoon and fork is "runcible". That word was good enough for 150 years - we don't need no special words to describe the annoying breaky plasticy things from fastfoodland.

From 1871: "They dined on mince, and slices of quince. Which they ate with a runcible spoon," from The Owl & The Pussy-Cat.

"Just keep walkin, preacher man."

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 11:30 AM

THATWEIRDGIRL


I love spam. I do. Fried spam and creamed spam are my two favorite ways to eat spam. Of course, there are hundreds of spam reipes.

Ooh, I also carve spam. Anyone else do that? I won a couple cmpetitions. I left the circuit when my mother's team took 1st.

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 11:36 AM

HOWDYROCKERBABY1


Quote:

Originally posted by WhooDahn:
Quote:


Ah ... the ugly old bad days. I remember when the makers of TANG were bragging in commercials that it was the stuff astronauts drank in space.



Does TANG stand for This Ain't No Good?

I love using double negatives.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"



AIN'T NO would actually be a quadruple negative...just trust me

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
MAL: This is my scrap of nowhere. You go on and find your own.
SAFFRON: You can't just leave me here, on this
lifeless piece of crap moon...
MAL: Sure I can.
SAFFRON: I'll die.
MAL: Well, as a courtesy, you might start
getting busy on that, cause all this chatter ain't doin' me any kindness.

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 11:37 AM

GUNHAND


Spam is something that if I never see again it won't be too soon.



Although I would be interested in Spamsculptures, for some reason when I read that it just made me laugh. A lot.



~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"Oh hey, I got an idea. Instead of us hanging
around playing art critic till I get pinched by
the Man, how's about we move away from this
eerie-ass piece of work and get on with our
increasingly eerie-ass day, how's that?"

My eerie-ass website:
http://gunhandsfirefly.homestead.com/Index.html

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 12:10 PM

THATWEIRDGIRL


Glad I could make you smile.

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 4:05 PM

WHOODAHN


Quote:

Originally posted by howdyrockerbaby1:
AIN'T NO would actually be a quadruple negative...just trust me



There ain't no way I can't be loving to use quadruple negatives.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 4:09 PM

GUNHAND


Quote:

Originally posted by WhooDahn:
Quote:

Originally posted by howdyrockerbaby1:
AIN'T NO would actually be a quadruple negative...just trust me



There ain't no way I can't be loving to use quadruple negatives.

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"



My brain hurts now...



~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"Oh hey, I got an idea. Instead of us hanging
around playing art critic till I get pinched by
the Man, how's about we move away from this
eerie-ass piece of work and get on with our
increasingly eerie-ass day, how's that?"

My eerie-ass website:
http://gunhandsfirefly.homestead.com/Index.html

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 10:35 PM

WHOODAHN


Quote:

Originally posted by Xarr:
Quote:

Originally posted by SBWatcher:
Spam - A trademark used for a canned meat product consisting primarily of chopped pork (aka monkey) pressed into a loaf.



mmmmmmmmm processed monkey loaf...



So, let me get this straight...

All of that junk email I get is really trademarked chopped space monkeys pressed into a loaf and put into a can?

Some people delete spam and other people eat spam?

Do I filter my spam or carve it?
How do you carve an email?

I once fried a computer but I never fried spam on a computer.

Spam, spam, spam spam.

Gawd, now my head hurts.

There ain't no way I can't be loving not to dislike spam.

How many negatives was that????

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"

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Tuesday, May 18, 2004 10:41 PM

WHOODAHN


Quote:

Originally posted by howdyrockerbaby1:

AIN'T NO would actually be a quadruple negative...just trust me



An English professor once told his class that a double negative is a positive, but a double positive could never be a negative.

From the back of the class came a sarcastic "yeah, yeah"

"I ain't crazy and I've got papers to prove it"

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Saturday, May 29, 2004 11:59 AM

TEELABROWN


Quote:

There ain't no way I can't be loving not to dislike spam.

How many negatives was that????



More than I want to count.

_____________
"Freedom is the Freedom to say that 2 plus 2 make 4. If that is granted, all else follows"-Winston, 1984
Teela Brown, keeper of bad typing.
"No one reads these things any way."- Bart on Blackboard

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