Great Quotes You CAN'T Use by Schism

GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Great Quotes You CAN'T Use

POSTED BY: SCHISM
UPDATED: Saturday, June 13, 2009 01:13
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Friday, June 5, 2009 12:05 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TrainBandit:
I put together a poetry chapbook for class, and we had to make up a press name. I typed in "Gorram Press." I considered Shiny Press but I like the idea of inserting "gorram" into the middle of finals. Nobody but me knows what I mean.

"Looks like."

LOVE IT!!

_____
"He was mostly brave.....MOSTLY??!?!...he was brave..."

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Sunday, June 7, 2009 6:10 AM

ANOTHERSKY

I am ANOTHER "semi-muscular-man" wannabe!

Mostly my lines come out in times of good humor:

Watching some moron trying to out-speed the cops...
"where's that get fun?"

Passing comment to a roommate studying anatomy, stair landing, two in the morning: "The human body can be drained of blood in *.* seconds given adequate vacuuming systems."

All the time, nonplusses people: "Does that seem right to you?"

But, running for the bus, on an empty stomach and late for my unfinished final project, having not slept for almost 48 hours, there was a strange refrain that wouldn't leave my mind:

"Dear Buddha...please bring me a pony and a plastic rocket...and a plastic rocket bring me a pony and a plastic rocket...dear Buddha..."

I guess it was my brain's attempt at irony. (Given the tenants of Buddhism and my likelyhood of catching that bus).
Normally I don't engage it in conversation.

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Sunday, June 7, 2009 6:19 AM

CHRISISALL

Last year I had a new windshield put in my car, and I was driving on I-91 with my Son in the back seat, when a rock came flying out of nowhere & ricochetted off my new glass, leaving a thumbnail-sized crack- to which I automatically exclaimed: "What was that?"

The laughing Chrisisall

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Sunday, June 7, 2009 8:45 PM

ANOTHERSKY

Quote:
Originally posted by chrisisall:
Last year I had a new windshield put in my car, and I was driving on I-91 with my Son in the back seat, when a rock came flying out of nowhere & ricochetted off my new glass, leaving a thumbnail-sized crack- to which I automatically exclaimed: "What was that?"

The laughing Chrisisall

Now did your son say "It appeared to be the primary buffer panel?"

After which you announced the doom of all living occupants?

--
Going for a ride.

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Sunday, June 7, 2009 9:56 PM

FILLYGIRL

Operative: "Its worse than you know..." Mal: "It usually is."

when did this change from "lines you CAN"T use?"

Chaplain of the 76th Independant Battalion

Do not bother dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup!

...it's worse than you know...Operative
...it usually is.....Mal

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Sunday, June 7, 2009 10:11 PM

JEWELSTAITEFAN

Quote:
Originally posted by fillygirl:
when did this change from "lines you CAN"T use?"

Chaplain of the 76th Independant Battalion

Do not bother dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup!

...it's worse than you know...Operative
...it usually is.....Mal

I haven't been able to use "My muscular buttocks" but I haven't given up.

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Sunday, June 7, 2009 10:47 PM

CALHOUN

I got to use a Jayne quote I never thought I would be able to. Was sitting at an airport in Thailand waiting for my flight with this kid sitting opposite me just staring at me.. this kid didnt even blink, just kept staring. In the end I got jack of it and said "Shake your head boy, your eyes are stuck!" and it worked!

Loved it!

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Sunday, June 7, 2009 10:48 PM

FILLYGIRL

Operative: "Its worse than you know..." Mal: "It usually is."

re: muscular buttocks

ooohhh, good one! I get all kinds of racy pics in my mind with that one, its always been one of my favorites. It has Joss all over it.

Chaplain of the 76th Independant Battalion

Do not bother dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup!

...it's worse than you know...Operative
...it usually is.....Mal

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Sunday, June 7, 2009 10:52 PM

JEWELSTAITEFAN

Quote:
Originally posted by fillygirl:
re: muscular buttocks

ooohhh, good one! I get all kinds of racy pics in my mind with that one, its always been one of my favorites. It has Joss all over it.

Chaplain of the 76th Independant Battalion

Do not bother dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup!

...it's worse than you know...Operative
...it usually is.....Mal

Maybe, but Ize gotsta be careful, don't want it sounding gay.

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Monday, June 8, 2009 5:23 AM

ANOTHERSKY

Quote:
Originally posted by fillygirl:
when did this change from "lines you CAN"T use?"

Chaplain of the 76th Independant Battalion

Do not bother dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup!

...it's worse than you know...Operative
...it usually is.....Mal

My apologies, for one.

Here's one I have been dying to use (but probably never shall)spoken as it was; slowly and with impeccable pronunciation:

"Every-man-there, go back inside--or I will blow, a new crater in this ti-ny moon."

If that's not Wash pwnage, Serenity should get some guns.

--
Going for a ride.

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Monday, June 8, 2009 6:21 AM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)

I doubt I'm ever going to find occasion to say,
"Oh, look - they've got boy-whores, too!"

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Tuesday, June 9, 2009 1:55 AM

KWICKO

Quote:
Originally posted by HeWhoKicksAlot:
For when things get a little hairy at work...

"Sure would be nice if we had some GRENADES, dontcha think?"

But I like my job, and I don't think the folks higher up would see the humor....

Rob O.

I actually DO say that. More often than I should, in fact. It's usually when I'm trying to brute-force something, or as a substitution for the "I need the bigger hammer" kind of comment while working on a car...

Mike

Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day...
Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

"You're a idiot." -AuRaptor, RWED, May 27, 2009.

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Tuesday, June 9, 2009 2:03 AM

FILLYGIRL

Operative: "Its worse than you know..." Mal: "It usually is."

Quote:
Originally posted by AnotherSky:
Quote:
Originally posted by fillygirl:
when did this change from "lines you CAN"T use?"

Chaplain of the 76th Independant Battalion

Do not bother dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup!

...it's worse than you know...Operative
...it usually is.....Mal

My apologies, for one.

Here's one I have been dying to use (but probably never shall)spoken as it was; slowly and with impeccable pronunciation:

"Every-man-there, go back inside--or I will blow, a new crater in this ti-ny moon."

If that's not Wash pwnage, Serenity should get some guns.

--
Going for a ride.

Not a problem, no need to apologize, but it was very nice. I was enjoying the ones we can't use because there have been several threads about quotes we have used and this was new.

Chaplain of the 76th Independant Battalion

Do not bother dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup!

...it's worse than you know...Operative
...it usually is.....Mal

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Tuesday, June 9, 2009 3:01 AM

RIPWASH

I don't think many of us will find a use for:

"You shot me in the back! I didn't make you MAD, did I?"

*********************************************

"It's okay! I'm a leaf on the wind!!!"
"What does that mean?!?!?!"

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Tuesday, June 9, 2009 10:39 PM

JEWELSTAITEFAN

For quite some time, I thought I would not have occasion to use "We applied the cortical electrodes but failed to get a response from either patient." Alas, lately one of my supervisors (about the only good one) has been getting through my loaner DVD set, and now when we find some unplanned occurance, or a lack of coordination amongst the worker bees, or other unforseen happenings, I can use that, where he then sniggers and agrees.

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Tuesday, June 9, 2009 10:55 PM

JEWELSTAITEFAN

Not intending disrespect, but the thread title does keep changing, so maybe that's why some are posting quotes you CAN use.

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Wednesday, June 10, 2009 1:37 AM

ACRAZYIVAN

While playing two-player video games, I always try to take the pilot/driver seat in hopes that whoever I'm playing with and I will re-enact the simple

'No.'
'Yes.'
'No!'
'Yes!'

Between Mal and Wash while trying to land on Mr. Universe's moon during the ol' epic space battle.

Alas, no such luck.

Keep on flyin'

"We've gotta go to the crappy town where I'm a hero."

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Wednesday, June 10, 2009 1:50 AM

YINYANG

You were busy trying to get yourself lit on fire. It happens.

A quote I love but can't use:

"Now we have a boatful of citizens right on top of our... stolen cargo." Zoe's just fabulous.

Of course, the end of that exchange -

ZOE: Oh yeah, this is gonna go great.

MAL If anyone gets nosy, just, you know... shoot 'em.

ZOE: Shoot 'em?

MAL: Politely.

is very usable, but it hasn't come up for me yet.

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Thursday, June 11, 2009 11:31 AM

TRAINBANDIT

I long to tell my less favorites professors:
"Ah hell. If I'd wanted schoolin' I'd'a gone to school."

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Thursday, June 11, 2009 3:54 PM

LEOPARDFLAN

I don't know if this one has already been submitted, but

"We're humped"

or

"I swallowed a bug"

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Thursday, June 11, 2009 4:49 PM