Haken's Arch Enemy Issues Challenge by Succatash

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Haken's Arch Enemy Issues Challenge

POSTED BY: SUCCATASH
UPDATED: Friday, May 2, 2003 10:43
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VIEWED: 1633
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Thursday, May 1, 2003 6:47 PM

Hey Everybody, I'm just the messenger, so please don't get mad at me personally. But I have been forced to give you a message by Haken's arch enemy, the Anti-Haken.

http://www.strangefinger.com/anti-haken.mpg

As I am writing this message, I am currently being violated by the Anti-Haken. I am helpless as I type this evil message. The Anti-Haken has turned me into his bitch.

The Anti-Haken says, "I am the Anti-Haken! I have returned! All of you must bow before me! Each of you must surrender to the power of Reality. Science Fiction is just a fantasy!"

I am scared crapless and I advise you all to do what he says.

THE ANTI-HAKEN
http://www.strangefinger.com/anti-haken.mpg

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Thursday, May 1, 2003 7:13 PM

TRAGICSTORY

Dear Succatash,
I got no problem with you going against other members of this board (God knows you should know this better than anyone) BUT if you support the Anit-Haken stint, I swear I will do my best to make your life miserable. Haken should be beyond our taunts and challenges. He is the father figure that we all should bow down to. So if you are in any way against the leader of this great site I will do my best to twart you.

Peace,
Tragic Story

PS. I got another vid in the works for you and maniac.

"Societies are supported by human activity, therefore they are constantly threatened by the human facts of self-intrest and stupidity." --Peter Berger

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Thursday, May 1, 2003 9:30 PM

SUCCATASH

Please, I am being forced to type..... The Anti-Haken is too powerful.

I...cannot...help...myself. Going Kirk...too much torture...

THE ANTI-HAKEN, GOD OF REALITY, HAS RETURNED!

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Thursday, May 1, 2003 9:32 PM

MANIACNUMBERONE

Hey, everyone. I know some of you may have misconstrued Succatash. I also know that this very corrupted and amusing idea (from a corrupted and twisted brain) may come across as strange and somewhat against Haken, but rest assured that there is an unforeseen twist to come. Succatash is a great admirer of Haken. He would not actually try to do anything against Haken. Rather, I bet that he is trying to set up an extreme set of circumstances which will allow more funniness to ensue.

Who can't like that?

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Thursday, May 1, 2003 10:13 PM

SUCCATASH

I'm safe, I broke free!

My good friends, I have finally escaped the clutches of the evil Anti-Haken. I have suffered terribly for the last several hours. I feel that I must warn everyone and help in some way.

You can click here to learn about this terrible new threat to Haken: http://www.strangefinger.com/anti-haken.mpg

Haken needs to be warned about the return of his arch enemy. What can we do? It looks like there is going to be a fight between two mighty powers.

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Thursday, May 1, 2003 10:26 PM

MANIACNUMBERONE

GLad to hear you've regained control of the situation Succatash. Is this going to be a lightning in the sky type of battle? I sure hope so. I really like those. Angry superpowerful beings going at it in the clouds.

What is this challenge that has been issued to Haken? I need more info!

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Who's winning?
I can't really tell, they don't seem to be playing by any civilized rules that I know.
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Thursday, May 1, 2003 10:27 PM

SUCCATASH

My money's on Haken, he know's how to fight.

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Friday, May 2, 2003 10:33 AM

TALRIUS

Name: Hakandros the Destroyer

Classification: Demon, non corporeal

Method to Dispatch: Unknown

The being, now called Evil Haken was forged into existence before the time of man. As an almighty destroyer of good, Harkandros once held the universe in his grasp.

The Powers made him the ultimate weapon to be used against those that got in their way. During his service to them Hakandros became aware of his own existence. Seeing that he held the power to destroy all he wish, Hakandros turned on his masters. In the war that followed much of the universe was destroyed. The war came down to the one place, Earth. The Powers unleashed their new weapon on Hakandros, the three demons of country music, the Dixie Chicks. Together they fought against Hakandros and came out victorious.

With Hakandros defeated the universe could go back to normal. But, Hakandros foresaw his defeat so he had woven himself into the fabric of the universe so that he would never be defeated. The Powers seeing this came up with a plan. If Hakandros was needed to keep the universe in alignment they would strip him of his evilness and let his goodness grow. Knowing that Hakandros would despise this very thing. So they did it.

But during the process Hakandros corrupted the Dixie Demons and the Powers had to sealed them away in a photo for all time. Once Hakandros was stripped on his evilness he was re-dubbed: Haken, Savior of the Firefly Fans.

There is only one thing that will bring Hakandros back into the world again. To emulate the photo of the Dixie Demons. Once this ceremony is complete Hakandros will posses the person.

Once this person is possessed they will seek out Haken to join Hakandros' essence together with his body.

See also: Photo of Evil, Dixie Demons, Haken the Savior of Firefly Fans.

-Hakandros entry from the Watcher's Guide Book-

Okay, a little corny but hey what the hell.

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Friday, May 2, 2003 10:43 AM

HAKEN

Likes to mess with stuffs.

BTW, when those Dixie Chicks were nakid, they were at my humble abode. And, I must say, it's great that they're of different heights.

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