Male and Female Imponderables--Gypsy Road by Tristan

Ha firstyness!

Superfastlikeafreak!

Kelkhil

The Shirtless Forsaken

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Monday, November 6, 2006 12:26 PM

RMMC

I think this is as close to first as I'm likely to get.

*******
RMMC

When we're down, don't frown. Come join the camp-out at serenitymovie.org.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 12:32 PM

CHRISMOORHEAD

Does anyone here remember their first fight? A friend of mine's sister just told me about a scrape her and some friends got into, resulting in cracked ribs amongst other things. I was like, damn, I didn't know women got that raw on each other. Hell, I can't remember the last time I was in a fight that was as bad as that. Heads getting pounded against the wall and everything...

So anyways, yeah, anyone remember their first fight? Best fight? Worst fight?

[IMG]

Place my body on a ship and burn it on the sea,
Let my spirit rise, Valkiries carry me.
Take me to Valhalla where my brothers wait for me.
Fires burn into the sky, my spirit will never die.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 12:35 PM

I've only been in two unplanned, violent altercations (as opposed to the unchoreographed sword fights...). Neither was spectacular. One ended with me at the Dr's office, the other ended with the other guy on the ground. Both were in 9th grade. Since then, I have been mostly non-violent...well, except, as I mentioned, the swordfighting...but there were rules attached to that.

______________________________________

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Monday, November 6, 2006 12:38 PM

Alright, it's been a week since this happened, but I need some help on this particular issue in the Wacky World of 13. Imponderable? I'll give you an imponderable.

Okay. How to start?

I've got this friend, see, same age as me (as some of you know is far from legality) who comes to me a week ago. We'll call her 'J.'

So, J doesn't look too good. Not smeared or cry-eyes, I mean emotionally torn, confused, general lost-in-the-woods.

I ask what's wrong. Can you see what part comes next?

She's pregnant. A fourteen-year old girl who has no idea of life outside of the little sphere that we (my community, I suppose) live in. She refuses to tell me who the father is (can't believe I'd ask somebody that before I get my driver's license) and also refuses to tell her parents, something that I too will not do. J expects me to know what to do, what to say. And I want to help, but I just can't figure it out.

Far as I know it, I'm the only person who knows.

That's #1 on the list of problems, but rest assured there will be more to follow.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 12:50 PM

CHRISMOORHEAD

Urge her to tell her parents. The only way anything is going to get solved is through them, no matter how difficult it might seem. Maybe try the mother, or whichever one is more understanding about those types of things, first. But deffinately let them know, and the sooner, the better. If things advance too far before they find out, they'll be limited in the things they can do to help.

I'd really like to go on a rant about the evils of sexuality and America's general indifference/support of it right now, but for the sake of not adding to your problems, I'll hold it back.

Also, try and learn from her mistake. Practice discipline and celibacy for as long as you can stand it.

[IMG]

Place my body on a ship and burn it on the sea,
Let my spirit rise, Valkiries carry me.
Take me to Valhalla where my brothers wait for me.
Fires burn into the sky, my spirit will never die.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:11 PM

MSG

CMH- May I just say "BEST ADVICE EVER" ( in dramatic comic book guy on the Simpsons fashion) And you are preaching to the choir about how we've pretty much got a country that's diminished childhood into non-existance.

13 If she won't tell them, you have to! She can't go this alone and she needs adult help. If you really think the parents are going to harm her or throw her out, then find a good teacher and tell them. Let them take it from there. Next part of that advice is she needs to get to a doctor asap and get on pre-natal vitamins and such or she could end up with serious health problems... Hang in there. This is so tough and I just feel sad ever time I see it. I am so sorry that you are having to deal with the adult responsability of advising a pregnant friend.

MAGDA- oh big hugs big sis. I can't believe we're on at the same time again!! Yippee I definitely have to start staying late or getting on at home

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:13 PM

I'd have to agree with CMH,
Please urge this girl to tell her parents, or a grown relative she feels comfortable with.But under no circumstances should you shoulder any responsibility for her.Be a friend, but please know that you can't do anything for her.She needs an adult who cares for her to help her through this.She is much too young to go through this alone.And you are wonderful for caring by the way,but don't ;et her problems become yours.

Bryce
***********************************

I swallowed a bug.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:15 PM

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"

OK... since I posted this at the same time as someone started a new thread I thought I'd copy it here!

Oh my!!! Desk Top HIppie

- thank you! Thank you!

There I was... my heart crushed and my own hearts-blood pouring over the 'puter on account of - *lip trembles* - Tristan's kiss... *eyes well up, lip quivers* - and then you came along with your Jayne number!

I love it!!! I am giggling and grinning and my nieces and nephew think I drank the wrong coffee (actually I did - it is much stronger than I thought and I have just about melted the cup with it!) ...but you made my day!!

Hello MsG, JohnnyQ, Mavourneen, RIMG! I knew that the moment I went to bed you would all come out and play!! No fair!

Tristan ...

oh... never mind...

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:16 PM

MSG

Well you're just going to have to stop all this sleeping Magda:) Just kidding big sis. Oh it's so good you're here:) HUGS I just sent an email. I'll send pics of the new room when I remember to bring the camera and all.

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:19 PM

CHRISMOORHEAD

C'mon, Tristan, details! What were you gettin fixed at the hospital? How'd the other guy wind up on his ass? You went strait to the bone, and didn't give us any of the meat!

[IMG]

Place my body on a ship and burn it on the sea,
Let my spirit rise, Valkiries carry me.
Take me to Valhalla where my brothers wait for me.
Fires burn into the sky, my spirit will never die.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:33 PM

ZEEK

13 I think everyone else has it covered but I'll just chime in with more of the same. Get her to tell her parents. Unless her parents are violent, there is no way hiding it is going to help her. The parents will either figure it out on their own with time as the signs will start to show, or she'll need to leave home to hide it. That's not going to help the situation any. Plus her parents have been through pregnancy before. They'll know stuff like MsG just said about vitamins and such. There's no way a 14 yearold is going to know everything that's right for the baby.

Get her to talk to her parents or at least an adult of some kind. There have to be counciling place where an adult will help. No matter what she needs some sort of adult guidance here. I doubt she'll find them to be as scary as she's imagining.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:34 PM

MSG

I have definitely verbally slain my fair share of idiots...however, I've never been in a fight that wasn't sparring or training. However I have broken up an enormous number and taken a few hits in the process ( I still grumble about the hit to the nose that nearly ruined my new white sweater) and I have broken up a girl fight that had spilled a vast amount of blood and broken one girl's jaw ( by the time I pulled the little psychos off each other anyway)I wouldn't say there's anything all that special about getting in a fight...now avoiding or defusing a fight before it happens...that's impressive.

And on that note, I'd best be heading home. Dinner to cook, laundry to fold, and I have to go to the gym as I only went 5 times last week and only managed to get weight training in once. Have a lovely evening folks. Big hugs all around

13- email me if you need someone to unload on or someone to listen oncemorewithfeeling321@yahoo.com and good luck honey.

Magda- Love you big sis..night:)

Tristan- good luck with the kisses..not that you need it or anything:)

DTH- :)

FMF- wherever you are..HUGS

NVG- Get over there right now mister!!! DO what feels right HUGS

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:35 PM

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"

Hey 13 - Sorry I didn't see your post until after I put my own silly one up! First of all - thank you for having the sense to come to your FFF.net family - we love being here for each other and you've done the right thing sharing it with friends who care! {{hugs}}

I would second (or third?) both Chris and MsG on telling someone in a position of responsibility! It is not something that you should keep to yourself, and I know you do not want to 'betray her confidence' but this is too important to not talk with someone about! She might be hurt or even angry with you initially, and you are a wonderful person who will hesitate to see that happen with your friend, but believe me - she will also be relieved that it has happened and she will thank you one day! I mean that - she will look you in the eye and say "thank you"!! we all face these difficult dilemmas - it is hard, but better all around to just do the right thing - even when you know there might be an adverse emotional reaction at first!

Believe me - you need to talk with her parents, or if you are really concerned about how they will cope, consider your parents or a teacher/counsellor at school, or a person in your community whom your know will treat the situation with respect and sensitivity! Then it is their responsibility to steer things in a healthier direction! All you can do is be there for your friend - it sounds like she knows you are for her to share this with you - and thank goodness she did!

Take care 13!! We love you - and never hesitate to come to your FFF.net family for love and advice - even if we are on the other side of the world!

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:39 PM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE

Wow, 13, sorry you find yourself in that situation. But good for you for trying to get advice on how to help.

I have to say that I agree with CMH and MsG, but with one reservation -- think long and hard about J's relationship with her parents before you go to them. If you think they might hurt her (physically or emotionally) or throw her out for this, it may be best to get another adult involved first. If you think that there is *any* chance that her own father is the baby's father (a truly horrifying idea, I know, but one that I think deserves at least a passing consideration), then go straight to another trusted adult, like a teacher.

The best thing for your friend is going to be the advice and care of an adult who is concerned for both J's well-being, and the well-being of her baby. Ideally that role would fall to her parents, but getting another adult involved may help, even if it's just to help J know how to talk to her parents about this.

As I'm sure you already know, this is going to be a very stressful time for J, and emotions are going to be running high for everyone. I think the best thing you can do for her is to first convince her to talk to an adult, and then just be her friend. She is going to be getting advice and demands from every quarter, and she would probably appreciate knowing that she can turn to you for a hug or a listening ear.

And of course, feel free to come here for a hug and a listening ear of your own.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:46 PM

That's some fine advice CK.
13 please listen to us & get her the help she and the baby need.

Magda , are we really here at the same time ?

And I just posted pics of my boys on the film companion thread.I figured I'm always going on about them so you guys might as well put faces to their names.Not to mention how cute I tink they are !

Bryce
*************************

I swallowed a bug.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:55 PM

I just happen to return and can see 13, Mags, and CK. What a rare occasion.

So, 13. Firstly, check the board. There's a thread talking about Uwe Bolls new piece of crap. Secondly, you'll eventually have to tell someone for the sake of mother and possible child. Pre-natal care is so important especially for one so young. Regardless if she decides to keep it or not, remember that your friends come first. Consider that she may hate you for telling someone, at least she, and possibly the child may be alive and well in the coming years. That is far more important.
But, in the case of which you speak, talk it all over with her first. Give her the chance to come clean with all that she needs to. But set a time limit with her and stick with it. If you give too much time there might be an oversight you did not forsee.
Most of all, and it may sound selfish, but consider what keeping the secret may cost you. She made a decision to do something with another person and this is the consequence. This is their mess, not yours. You are a concerned third party with your own welfare to consider. I don't know the circumstances, but I have seen witnesses persuaded to change their story. If the circumstance allows for someone to persuade you, you scream at the top of your lungs to any and all around you that way you are not the only one with the secret.
Hopin' that helps a little. We're all around to listen if you need a little support.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 1:57 PM

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"

Hey California Kaylee

!! It is so very good to see you again - and your advice is spot on too! I didn;t know how to suggest that there could be some more sinister reason for not approaching J's parents, but you just did it so much better than me... Also good to point out that she will be in need of someone who won't always try to 'solve' things - but just be there with a hug and support!

Yes!! Little Albatross

!!! I do believe we are here together!! It's almost 11am! Yay!!

Edit: NVG

!! Hey there sweetie! Good advice too! Of course though - you's da man!

...and thanks for the email LA!

and MsG

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:06 PM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE

Hey Magda!

I have a killer headache, so I thought I'd take a break from work for a bit and stop by to say hi. Hubby and I started a new diet over the weekend, and cleaned out our kitchen of all the "bad" things we won't be eating anymore. Including all my chocolate and coffee, which means that I am smack dab in the middle of PMSing, and hubby took away all my chocolate and caffeine! I should have thought that through before I suggested this diet.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:09 PM

DANCINGNEKO

I start typing responses to everything and still try to work and look at what happens..

13: Chiming in with the same advice that everyone else has given you. The goal is to get her to talk to her parents and figure out the rest. If she (or you) is worried about her being thrown out of the house, pick an adult that you're both comfortable confiding in and ask them to help. Counselor, teacher, clergy, family member -- this load isn't something to take on by your lonesome, let a trusted adult take the lead in dealing with this.

*HUGS* to you and her. Be willing to support her (and her family's) choice too. While we (on the thread) are mainly talking about J taking the pregnancy to full term, if the decision is to abort, please be supportive of her. It's not an easy choice, nor will it be easy on her emotionally nor on her psyche. Either way, she's going to need someone to be her friend through whatever choice she takes.

----
(On a side note/rant: I swear, I've had an average of at least one pregnancy with the students I'm teaching/working with. Figuring out the "Whys," "Wherefores," and "How to make sexual activity unappealing to anyone below the age of 19" would definitely be an imponderable.)

MsG: Yay on the getting everything moved. (I hope that you were able to sweet talk the custodians into helping *fingers crossed*) Always helps to know who truly runs the school (and who deals with the naughty ones). *Genuflects in the direction of the custodians, good security folk, and the office staff* (Doing that makes teaching life easier

)

Oh, and about the scary -- hush MsG...

Just 'cause you've seen scarier (and I agree, adolescents can be scary in an oddly adorable way sometimes)

...There's just some things those non-teacher folks don't need to know...

*Heh* I'm glad to know that I'm not the only crazy teacher to jump in between fights and try to break it up. I wonder if it's because I've worked in special ed? (And yes, I've broken up fights where the kids were taller and bigger than me, and one fight where at least one kid was wielding a broom and trying to knock the other kid senseless with it.) Worst I've come away with in those fights has been a bruise on my arm.

Tristan: *counts pennies* As soon as someone will help sponsor me for my "great North American Tour" this coming summer. (If I go as far as 'bama and not visit a few of my friends in states west of there, I'll probably have to hide under a rock -- they know whereabouts I live and would proably hunt me down.

)

Otherwise...if I do what I'm plotting for winter break -- hey! I'm flying halfway 'cross the continent....the least you folks could do would be to meet me where I land.

(That or stop here before and after you vist Austrailia.

)

*starts plotting on how to make sure Tristan loses the ability to stand much less walk when it's my turn*

Magda: *hugs* ...all it means is that Tristan lost the ability to move his feet...

You need to make sure that he loses his ability to move.

Okay, I'm going to try and finish work today before I post any more...see you all later!

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:11 PM

The heavens must be singing. I can't belive my good fortune ! And I just sent you an e-mail too !
11 am Tuesday ? The time differnce makes me go crosseyed.We're settling down to yet another Power rangers marathon.This will be going on all week.Please feel free to pity me now.

And I just bought my tickets for the BDM on Friday night.It's another midnight showing, ala Rocky Horror.Shiny ! I can't wait.

Can you get here by Friday ? I'd love to have you along Magda !

Bryce
****************************************

I swallowed a bug.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:16 PM

First fights huh? Well, I pretty much got my ass handed to me for alot of years after we moved back to Stillwater. My brother and sisters are all halfbreeds so there was problem number one. Number two was the guys I grew up around were always larger and meaner. Problem number three, I was used to being beat on at home so it was never a big thing to take it on the outside. Skip a few years ahead and I'd been chopping and hauling wood. Pushing cars around the yard to be fixed. Moving heavy stuff for our dad for the sake of moving stuff and before I new it I was 5'11", 190 pounds, had a size 14 shoe, and had one hell of a tough layer of skin built up. And I was, 13. When six guys jumped me after gym class and none of them left school without help, that is what I consider the first. And the last. I got into some other things that seemed for the good of folks, but never really felt right. I've been in tons of physical altercations, restrained folks for thier safety, and played bullet catcher more times than I'd like to mention. But the biggest fight seems to be the fact of knowing something else is bound to happen and there's nothing you can do to prevent it.
Yet another moral dilemma. Working with some of our kids I realize that someday I might have to defend myself against a few of the or some like them. To see the sickness within them is starting to scare me. And I don't scare easily. This is something thats really crossed my mind for a few years now. I'm starting to think that some of these kids are so sick they are almost capable of projecting the sickness to others.
Kinda ran outta steam here. Just venting I guess.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:24 PM

BLACKSHAMROCK5

Always wanted to go to midnight showing of Rocky and never went mostly cause i have noone to go with but are all of the horror stories of what they do to midnight showing virgins true? cause if they are no thank you.

remember that a kick in the ass is a step forward

Shamrock

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:32 PM

TERRI

Yeah, I've never been in a fight, mostly because I hate confrontation, but also, because I am a zoftig, black woman, and most people think I'm chock full of attitude so they'd rather not mess with me. Little do they know.... But still, yeah, when I was a kid the closest thing I ever came to a fight was accidentally getting headbutted in the face by this kid in my class. Actually, my teacher cursed him out more than I did. But, yeah, I don't like confrontation. I have yelled at people before, though.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:40 PM

13 - Listen to these folks. They have given all the advice that you could need. She is going to need help with whatever her decision is going to be. Just be there for her as a friend afterwards because she will need it.

NVG - With what you do there are almost always going to be lost causes. For some reason no matter what you do you will not be able to get through to them. You need to keep it up for the kids that you are getting though to now and for those that will need you in the future. Yeah it could be dangerous due to a few individuals but to me it seems worth the risk for those that are still on that edge and can be helped.

Mags - Hi! Sure never mention your brother in passing. I'm telling MOM!

Hi Dancing!

CMH - Was in one actual fight in school. Don't remember much of it but my friend was a few yards off and saw the whole thing (it was over before he could get there).
There were 4 of them and they jumped me from behind. THe first guy hit me in the back of the head with a cane (hence the no memory). Then he hit me in the ribs with the cane, kneeded me in the ribs and punched me in the face. Whe his 3 second flurry was over I looked him in the face and asked him if he was finished and I walked away. 4 on 1 is a loosing situation when weapons are involved and they were in such shock that I didn't go down that they just let me walk off.

There were others but all in self defense.

Kelkhil

The Shirtless Forsaken

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:42 PM

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"

Hey LittleAlbatross

!! Oh I so wish I could join you - it sounds like the perfect start to a girls night out!!

sorry though - I think I have enough money to get me to... ah... no - I don't have enough for NYC this Friday...

There's always next September though!!

Hey HVG

& {{{BIG HUGS}}}} - you are just so awesome! And to know that you might need to deal with issues like that means that you have some ideas ready for it you have to deal with it! If there is anything you can do now to diffuse the potential situation or if you can protect yourself legally or physically in some way you have a home advantage! Write things down - talk to people and if there's a phychologist around express your concerns and ask for ideas to help you to handle them well! We love you and know how lucky these people are to have you working with them!!

Oh - by the way Neko-chan

- when I've finished with him, Tristan won't even remember he ever had a bone in his body and moving, walking and talking will have to be re-learned!

Ah - BTW Neko? - is your cat on something today?????

Edit: Oh it's so not true Muuuuuuuuum!!! Kelkhil says I'm ignoring him... He's just being mean!!!!

and he got in a fight Mum... he said so - I heard him bragging about it!!!

Terri, BlackShamrock! Hi Girls!!

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:47 PM

BLACKSHAMROCK5

I've never been in a physical fight with anyone...unless you count that time in sixth grade when punched a boy in the stomache but he made fun of my pigtails so I think its justified. I'm happy to say that my temper has gotten better since then, but I have gotten in a couple of verbal fights that have gotten pretty bad.

remember that a kick in the ass is a step forward

Shamrock

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:49 PM

Blackshamrock5 - Well hello Mei-Mei , I'm so happy to see you here !
AS far as Rocky Horror goes -
they would ask who was a virgin & then do a few pelvic thrusts their way. Nothing too outrageous, unless you embarass easily. I don't think it's shown here anymore, but I used to see it at the original 8th st.Playhouse in Greenwich Village.Needless to say I had many great times & am lucky to never have been arrested.

Oh & Kelkhil, I don't merit a hello, but you call Mags on passing you by ? Well then ! I'm telling someone too.

Hi NV -Those kids are so lucky to have you as someone to look up to.

Bryce
*********************************

I swallowed a bug.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:53 PM

Oops. Sorry LA29

! But I did have your drink ready in the Pub (bonus points maybe

)

Kelkhil

The Shirtless Forsaken

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:57 PM

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"

Muuuuuuuummy!! Kelkhil's being mean to my friends and then he's giving them drinks and not me!!!

Muuuuuuuuum!!!

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:58 PM

Always some bonus points for a delicious margarita my dear !
And for looking at the pics of the boys. I love showing them off.

Magda -check out the film companion thread.There's a pic of Sean that I haven't sent you yet !
Bryce
*******************************

I swallowed a bug.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 2:58 PM

Check the Pub there Sis!

Kelkhil

The Shirtless Forsaken

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Monday, November 6, 2006 3:01 PM

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"

awwwww... s'OK Mum! K's playing nice... he's sharing even... come on LA lets go and play in the pub!

*The two girls hold hands and skip off to the pub!*

...and yet there's something oddly wrong with that last statement...

Hmmmm - I should be feeding my nieces and nephew some lunch I think...

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Monday, November 6, 2006 3:03 PM

Magda,
Who needs lunch when we can skip off to the pub ?
The little ones can eat there ! I just know there's a kid's section.

Bryce
*********************************

I swallowed a bug.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 3:05 PM

Still kinda reeling from the shock of actually runnin' in to ya Mags. Thanks. I never did think they did until recently. But I hear from more of them as time goes by and it feels good.

I guess that sometimes it just gets me how utterly worthlees our kids feel. I haven't written any of them off, but there are a few that might be forming their own lists. That is what scares me.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 3:34 PM

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"

Hey NVG!! I love that we're here together - it's a public holiday in Melbourne and I am looking after my nieces and nephew instead of being in 'at work' mode!! I am so glad that you are realising the impact you have on those younger folk in your community - we never doubted it here, but it is sometimes harder to recognise it yourself!

And LittleAlbatross... oh - that's a tough call... the pub versus hot dogs with my nieces and nephew! Well... as there's nobody about to lick off the jelly shots

*sigh* I think I'll just have to pay homage to my US-based friends, and go with the hot dogs!! The American contribution to world side cuisine - and what a contribution it is too!

Thanks for the Baileys though Kelkhil!!

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Monday, November 6, 2006 3:39 PM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"

Well, 13: This is a tough one. There's been a LOT of good advice posted here. I'd say that my first thought, after reading a couple of the posts, mirrors CaliforniaKaylee's. Maybe I watch too much Law & Order: SVU. If she doesn't want to ID the father, it's very possible that something else is going on, and it very well might involve someone else altogether, and she's afraid.

It is VERY clear here that some responsible adult needs to be brought in on this and I thing NVGhostrider outlined some very important steps. And while many people might hope it doesn't come down to it, I want to echo DancingNeko: be her friend no matter what. Think about how all of us don't care about anything but each other's wellbeing: one of us even hints at a problem and Browncoats come out of the woodwork with support. That's what you need to be for her. Unless the baby is yours, it truly is her problem, but true friends help each other carry those burdens; just remember it is not yours.

It's a short list, each memorable< to me at least, for different reasons. In no particular, but somewhat chronological, order.

1. Kindergarten. Got my brand-new Batman beanie/mask and just had to where it to school. Prevailing thought among every other boy in the class: "If you're really Batman, you could beat all of us at once!" Huh, I just wanted to be their hero. Lesson learned. No physical injury, but hapless humiliation.

2. One of the perceived bullies challenged me (actually this scene played out with varying degrees of animosity and different players), and I accepted. Shocked him enough that grinned and let me off without any incident at all. This was significant because it was the beginning of my understanding of the nature of bullying.

3. Kid who took a dislike for me (don't know why, except I was a geek, and he was a jock), kept pushing buttons and picking and finally I said something back that escalated things to the point where I ended up in my back on the floor. No injuries again, but a lot of red-faced huffing and puffing. We eventually became friends but not especially "close".

4. Fast-forward to college. A gay friend was having a birthday and a small group of us got together to take him bar hopping. It was the early eighties and being gay was a lot different than it is now--and of course in some ways not at all--and gay-bashing was much more than just insults based on orientation that people these days refer to. It was real assault and battery kind of stuff, and it is still like that these days sometimes. Only your best friends could know you were gay. Anyway, after several other stops we ended up at one of the very few gay bars in town and after toasting our fill (having been very full before our arrival there), we left.

We parted to our various rides (designated drivers may have existed at the that time, but most of us never thought of them or never heard of them). On our way to the car, the birthday boy and passed a couple of homophobes (a word, if it had been invented back then, was only n use by gay activist and police precincts), who, without benefit of knowing about my non-Slyness, made a comment which I, not having any restraint, decided not to let go unanswered. I personalized their insult (let your imaginations go) and they kinda took me up on the challenge. I remember three quick punches to the head and then I remember being on the ground and seeing kicks being applied to my friend. I apparently didn't notice the same treatment being applied to me. They stole my genuine black leather cap! Oh yeah and apparently one of those kicks broke a finger bone. More lessons learned than I care to count...

"Well, here I am...Does that seem right to you?"

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Monday, November 6, 2006 4:02 PM

Yeesh. Takin' a few lumps for a friend. Thats the stuff real men are made of. Family is one thing, friends are another. We are not beholding to them yet we set out for harms way when it comes to their well being. I see a Browncoat shining through on JQ's post. Injuries aside, thats cool.
Besides, the bashers sounded like a buncha p^@@*^ anyways. You'd think they woulda done more than that if it were such a pressing issue.
Either that or alcohol really can save lives

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Monday, November 6, 2006 4:18 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Okay, the good advice thing has been covered so...
Can I just say the education system in this country needs some serious work and parents need to be NOT squeamish when it comes to painting a realistic picture of sex? Why the hell was she having sex? Why the hell was she not using protection? This is assuming, uh, that nothing sinister was going on, which I guess should not be ruled out at all, but that's just... Don't wanna think about it or rant about it or I'll be on all night.
My parents were always ok with talking to me about it, and hence I knew it was something emotional that went beyond the raging hormones. Gee, what a concept. I also knew what protection was when I started. And I'll say again that unlike most of my friends, I had a good first experience (I also never had a pregnancy scare)
To any virgins here, I beg you, please please please wait til you know you're in love, with someone you care about who cares about you for real, and basically past puberty. All those are important for a lot of reasons. Too many reasons for me to even list. Though I can try, if there are ever any lost and/or confused young'uns about. Of course sex is going to be appealing, the only way to make it unappealing... Ok, I said I wouldn't go into that. The thing is, it's going to be better and happier and all around nicer when there's more to it than something physical, and that is what EVERYONE, not just children, needs to know.
And we're talking about fights? Oh, I was a violent little girl. The first fight I got into I don't actually remember, but I've heard the story; kid in preschool stole my coat so I bit him. Drew blood, caused a panic in the teachers, everything. Quite a few things like that happened when I was young; my mom thought 'seeing red' was just a figure of speech until I told her I had. Seeing red is a very strange thing, at least for me, because I see red, my mind seems to disconnect from my body, and I see what I do from a third-person perspective. Very, very creepy and I'm glad that 1) I've mellowed a little and 2) I'm not in school with all the crap that goes on there. Last and worst fight I was in was in 9th grade with this chick who was a lot bigger than me. She slammed my head into a filing cabinet and gave me a goose egg, and I twisted her arm until she cried and sat on her. We both got in very big trouble. Not fun, not at all pleasant. The consequences of all those fights sunk in as a very important lesson in control.
BlackShamrock; Virgin Pops are not that bad. It only hurts a little

No really, I think my pop was having to trade clothes with one of the male virgins in a little race with another pair. And you can always refuse to strip; they can't make you. Most Virgins I remember just got a smack on the butt and told to take their seats. Gawd, it's been so long since I went to Rocky. Too bad there's only the one cast 'round here, or I could still go, but avoid certain people I would prefer not to see. Yep, that would sure be shiny.
LA29, your boys are cute! And they even aim to misbehave

Morning jie jie!

[]

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Monday, November 6, 2006 4:38 PM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"

Quote:
Originally posted by nvghostrider:
Yeesh. Takin' a few lumps for a friend. Thats the stuff real men are made of. Family is one thing, friends are another. We are not beholding to them yet we set out for harms way when it comes to their well being. I see a Browncoat shining through on JQ's post. Injuries aside, thats cool.
Besides, the bashers sounded like a buncha p^@@*^ anyways. You'd think they woulda done more than that if it were such a pressing issue.
Either that or alcohol really can save lives

Wow, look at the size of PR post! Before I read that, a quick reply to NVG:
Well, taking the lumps might been big and damn heroic and stuff, but I hadn't done that thing where my lips were moving and sound comes out, we would have gone home and lived to drink another day. Well, I mean we did, but you know what I mean.

"Well, here I am...Does that seem right to you?"

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Monday, November 6, 2006 4:55 PM

ASORTAFAIRYTALE

Hmm...fights, eh?
I'm not a very violent person, being a pacifist and all, so I've never actually been in a real "fight" fight, unless you count yelling and stuff. I guess the closest would be just my sister hitting me, because she is a bit more violent than I am. Though I really think that getting into fights at school and stuff is more of a guy thing too.

---------
Love keeps her in the air when she outta fall down, tells you she's hurting before she keels. Makes her a home.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 5:12 PM

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"

Hello Mei Mei... thank you for your insight - you do share your thoughts an experiences most honestly and I treasure that!

And she is so right people!!

... and my nephew just 'broke my squee' (to use another of the gorgeous Phoenix Rose's sayings

) I got him dressed in jeans, orange & navy T-shirt, gumboots and jacket to play outside for a while and just before he runs out the door he stops puts one hand on his hip and says "Emmi? Do I look fashion?" way too cute!

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Monday, November 6, 2006 5:29 PM

Evening, all!
Just popping in real quick-like before getting back to the sewing.

Magda, I am sorry you are disappointed. If the situation were reversed, I would be thrilled for you. I hope you know that.

CMH...in the fight I ended up in the hospital for, I had to have both eyes worked on. Briefly, several members of the Freshman class were over at one of the students' houses building a float for Homecoming. Some of the Seniors came by to harass us, and a min-rumble ensued. I wore glasses at the time and had both lenses planted into my face...I ended up with cuts all around my eye sockets and cuts on my left eye. It eventually healed.
The other one was a quick fight...one punch and it was over. Also 9th grade...a bully of sorts just pushed me too far and I took one swing at him. Cracked his eye socket and broke his nose in the middle of gym one day.
Since then, I have been mostly peaceable.

13, the peeps in here have very good advice...I have nothing to add.

MSG, thank you!

Neko...I stand waiting.

Ooh, LA29, does that mean people will be acting out the BDM in front of the screen?

NVG, after the description of the fight...I am proud to call you friend, and would leave the country if it were otherwise!

KelKhil....damn. Just damn.

Ok, that should have me up to date....see you all tomorrow!

______________________________________

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Monday, November 6, 2006 5:34 PM

Okay folks. I'm out. Very tired and whatnot.
I'll see y'all tomorrow.

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Monday, November 6, 2006 5:35 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

Quote:
Originally posted by Tristan:
Ok, that should have me up to date....see you all tomorrow!

Ignore me, why doncha?

That fight sounds bad. I'm glad your eyes survived!

[]

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Monday, November 6, 2006 5:38 PM

Yeah I get the seeing red thing when I get hit. Kinda like PR especially if it is in the face. But when it goes red for me things slow way down and I have way too much time to think. Bad thing to have and good I guess. I am really not proud of the fights I have been in.

Kelkhil

The Shirtless Forsaken

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Monday, November 6, 2006 5:42 PM

PR, ok, I am an idiot. For some reason, I thought you were gone....but why would I think that? I have known you work late...and yet....
Sorry, PR...

I'll try not to let it happen again....

______________________________________

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Monday, November 6, 2006 5:44 PM

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"

*siddles up to Tristan & gives him a playful push*

Silly... got to keep up appearances sweet heart...

* shoves him again*

(mock sarcasm) Don't smile! ... no... I'm telling you - you're not allowed to smile!

*tickles him*

See... now that's more like it!

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Monday, November 6, 2006 5:47 PM