A Long overdue addition. (New Member w/ a Firefly Series Review, need feedback!) by CaptainJAG

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A Long overdue addition. (New Member w/ a Firefly Series Review, need feedback!)

POSTED BY: CAPTAINJAG
UPDATED: Wednesday, January 6, 2010 10:40
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VIEWED: 1509
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Wednesday, January 6, 2010 8:20 AM

Hey all,

Let me introduce myself quickly before I post my review. I am a longtime browncoat, and lurker on FFF.NET for the last few years or so... Ive just started to work on my own entertainment blog of sorts, where I'll be posting reviews of movies, TV series, and all things media essentially... but before I launch the site, I really want some genuine feedback on my writing and whether or not people enjoy it or not! So without any further ado, here is a special preview of the review for my #1 show of the 2000's decade:

#1 -- FIREFLY (2002) -- You Cant stop the Signal.

Rarely does one find a show that they can so closely identify with, and even rarer is it a show that happens to be a "space western." (which I offer as a definition only if you are forcing me to categorically define it) FOX ran it for less than a full season, airing it out of order, in a terrible time slot, and never did put a serious advertising push behind it, so it never even found its way to me until DVD years later, when 2 very good friends of mine thought I might like it. Well, they were wrong. I loved it. -- and in this case, when I say love it, I mean I love it like I love my right arm; I just wouldnt be the same person without it.

Its hard for me to pin down exactly what I love about it though... I suspect this is because there are quite a few things I could easily point to, but in the interest of brevity, I'll paraphrase what the creator of the show so poignantly recognized -- This show isn't about any one character or premise, its about a family just trying to get by. A family of honorable outlaws... oh, didnt i mention they are essentially thieves/smugglers already? No? Read on...

In a world where the greater majority is all about living in the now and being fond of the present, Firefly's idea of taking a future setting and heavily intermingling it with the past in the form of wild west stereotypes throws most people enough to not give the show a chance from the get go, but this a huge mistake for anyone who is looking to find a show with uncommonly meaningful themes, multi-dimensional character relationships, jokes a' plenty (that are actually funny and not contrived) and plain old action and thrills behind the sci-fi genre facade. Each of the 9 crew members are valuable and interesting, and each of them is just as endearing in their own way. The writing within the show is done in such a way that it gives us moments to just enjoy the characters before the shit hits the fan in some way and the casting was so spot on that we have no qualms in believing 100% in these moments. Thus, for these reasons, when things are going good, we enjoy the familial atmosphere and learn to like these people for who they are. Also, in turn, when things begin to go bad, as they so often do (hey it is a TV show after all!), we feel it. We feel the conflict as the 10th member of the crew (i. e. the viewer) but we also feel empathy for the other characters aboard the ship and how the turn of events impacts/effects them. The show collectively breathes, as though the sum of its crew members and the ship itself are greater than any of its interconnecting parts. In a word, this show is special.

Admittedly, there are people out there to whom Ive showed this series to and who just "dont get it." I suspect the future/historical clash is just too distracting for them, or their ADD prevents them from watching any show that doesn't keep their pulses racing for the entire 60 minute episode rather than taking time to build up to moments which feel far more genuine and exude importance/poignancy in the larger perspective. I feel sorry for those people. Sincerely sorry..... Still, there's some good news for fans even now. I've exposed as many people as i can to this 'verse and all its brilliance, and for every person that doesnt get it, there are three people who do -- and very often, one of these people doesnt just like it, they crave more. They curse me for drawing them into something so extraordinary, only to have it yanked away well before they were ready to let go. They want so badly to learn what happens with Mal and Inara, Wash/Zoe, Simon/Kaylee,... to find out why River is such a threat to the Alliance. They ask me whether it still has a chance to make a comeback, someway or somehow, someday. To which I always love responding, "Funny you should ask, it already has."

By all rights, this show should have faded into obscurity after such a brief and botched run on the air, but despite all this, it succeeded in finding its audience through word of mouth DVD sales, the dedication of a great many loyal fans (AKA Browncoats), and the stubborness of all those involved in its creation, actors included, in not letting it die. What other series do you know of that, with less than one full season of airing, was made into a critically acclaimed feature film? Thats right, NONE. In the words of the ol' captain himself, "We have done the impossible, and that makes us mighty." You cant stop the signal.

But enough about Firefly... Id like to write even more, but the grief of this shows passing is still to near for me to continue thinking about it and what could have been. Please, just go watch it. Then go watch the movie based of the show, entitled "Serenity." Then go write a letter to Fox or Universal and tell them how badly they screwed up and that they must do more with this license. This is all the thanks I require for turning you onto one of the best shows ever created. :)

[Special note: To my friends Shaun and Kevin -- Thank you. You've gained a fellow "Browncoat" for life. In a way, we are all captaining our own ships thru the 'verse. On my ship, I consider you both integral part of my crew. Hope you dont mind.]

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Wednesday, January 6, 2010 9:24 AM

BYTEMITE

Hi there, and welcome!

Hope you don't mind if I proof your article a bit? If you're going to be a serious entertainment site, then I think you definitely need to be producing well-proofed professional quality articles.

Quote:
oh, didnt i mention they are essentially thieves/smugglers already?

Missed an apostrophe and a capital letter there.

Quote:
In a world where the greater majority is all about living in the now and being fond of the present, Firefly's idea of taking a future setting and heavily intermingling it with the past in the form of wild west stereotypes throws most people enough to not give the show a chance from the get go, but this a huge mistake for anyone who is looking to find a show with uncommonly meaningful themes, multi-dimensional character relationships, jokes a' plenty (that are actually funny and not contrived) and plain old action and thrills behind the sci-fi genre facade.

This is kind of a run-on, any way you could break this up?

Quote:
Each of the 9 crew members are valuable and interesting

I think below 100 you're supposed to spell out numbers. Or it might be twenty. One of the two. Either way, that should be "nine."

Quote:
before the shit hits the fan in some way

I feel like this detracts from the sentence, your focus is on the nice character moments.

Quote:
Admittedly, there are people out there to whom Ive showed this series to and who just "dont get it."

I've. And don't.

Quote:
I suspect the future/historical clash is just too distracting for them, or their ADD prevents them from watching any show that doesn't keep their pulses racing for the entire 60 minute episode rather than taking time to build up to moments which feel far more genuine and exude importance/poignancy in the larger perspective. I feel sorry for those people. Sincerely sorry.....

You're starting a professional entertainment site, this might alienate some folks from the get-go. I'd keep the western/space part being distracting in, because that's true, that's the complaint I've heard most from people who don't want to give it a chance. They're concerned it'll be hokey.

The ADD might ALSO be true (do I sense a bit of hatred towards the lowbrow reality television that replaced Firefly here?), but probably don't say stuff like that until you got a following.

Quote:
I've exposed as many people as i can to this 'verse and all its brilliance, and for every person that doesnt get it, there are three people who do -- and very often, one of these people doesnt just like it, they crave more.

Need to capitalize 'I,' apostrophes for 'doesn't.' I'd actually rephrase the last part to "they don't just like it."

Quote:
They want so badly to learn what happens with Mal and Inara, Wash/Zoe, Simon/Kaylee,...

Extra comma on the end. Also, what is the professional writer's guide stance on ellipses? I always thought that in a professional paper, they were a big no-no.

Quote:
To which I always love responding, "Funny you should ask, it already has."

Responding to what? Clearly you mean the comments about wishing they were more, but you're missing an object here, and some people might get confused. The sentence structure also feels a bit awkward. Please revise.

Quote:
Id like to write even more, but the grief of this shows passing is still to near for me to continue thinking about it and what could have been.

I'd.

Quote:
This is all the thanks I require for turning you onto one of the best shows ever created. :)

Professional articles also avoid the use of smiley-faces.

:)

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Wednesday, January 6, 2010 10:12 AM

CAPTAINJAG

Bytemite,

First, thanks so much for pointing out all the grammatical errors/ommisions. Many of them had already been corrected upon my own proofreading, as this was not a finished product by any means. However, you caught quite a few that I had yet to catch, and I appreciate that very much!

As far as professionalism goes, Im not really worried about formality in the writing persay, (e.g. spelled out numbers vs the numeral symbols and the like) Its more of an informal stream of consciousness type of thing (think AICN.net, but hopefully better), and as long as the intended feeling and purpose of the article comes across, Im ok with it. Nonetheless, I appreciate that line of thinking as well and will consider it in the future -- especially if it means me reaching a wider audience as a result!

I hope none of this sounds too negative towards your comments though, I appreciate the criticism and hope to hear from you in the future on the site! Thanks again.

CAPTJAG

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Wednesday, January 6, 2010 10:23 AM

NEWOLDBROWNCOAT

Quote:
Originally posted by CaptainJAG:

In a world where the greater majority is all about living in the now and being fond of the present, Firefly's idea of taking a future setting and heavily intermingling it with the past in the form of wild west stereotypes throws most people enough to not give the show a chance from the get go, but this a huge mistake

Missing verb "is" before "a huge".

Lotta little nit-pick typos and grammar errors, too many to highlight, and in Bytemite's reply, he corrected one and let an error slip through at the same time. I'll reply to that in a second message.
But overall, what you've got to say is good.
One quibble-- you suggest that the viewer becomes the 10th crew member. Surely you're aware that Browncoats consider the SHIP a 10th Character, or is that a too complex concept that you chose not to burden your readership with? Valid choice if that's what you intended.

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Wednesday, January 6, 2010 10:24 AM

CAPTAINJAG

One more thing Bytemite,

It's evident you are quite intelligent and have a very strong command of the english language. Are you an editor by trade? Just curious... you did such a good job at being specific in your assesment! If your not, you might have missed your calling! :)

Finally, I still didnt get an overall feel for what you thought about the article as a whole...

As a Firefly fan, how does the article make you feel? Is there anything original about the review, or is it indistinguishable from any other positive account you may have read about Firefly in the past? Did I miss anything that you feel would make someone this article stronger?

Hope to hear from you soon,

CAPTJAG

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Wednesday, January 6, 2010 10:26 AM

NEWOLDBROWNCOAT

Quote:
Originally posted by Bytemite:

Quote:
Each of the 9 crew members are valuable and interesting

" Each of the 9 crew members IS valuable..."

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Wednesday, January 6, 2010 10:27 AM

BYTEMITE

I'll have to think about the effect I take away. The initial ask for "help" and "what do you think" kind of put me into grammar search mode.

Eee... I missed some? Aw.

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Wednesday, January 6, 2010 10:39 AM

CAPTAINJAG

NewOldBrownCoat,

Thanks. As far as your quibble is concerned: yes, I am VERY aware of the Ship being the "10th cast member" within the community-- mainly from the DVD featurette... Yet, as you stated, I felt like that concept was better left for the seasoned Browncoats, and that my readership (love that word) would better understand the concept as I chose to employ it.

thanks again!

CAPTJAG

P.S. I asked Bytemite a few questions in my reply to him, maybe you could answer them as well, if you were so inclined?

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Wednesday, January 6, 2010 10:40 AM

CAPTAINJAG

LOL! I just caught this one myself! Next time I post an article here, I promise to do the proofreading and correcting first!!!!! I was just so excited to share it with you all, I jumped the gun.

:)

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