The Serentiy Spoiler Warning & Rants Thread by NervousPete

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The Serentiy Spoiler Warning & Rants Thread

POSTED BY: NERVOUSPETE
UPDATED: Saturday, February 19, 2005 11:07
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Saturday, February 19, 2005 3:13 AM

"My God, did you see it?" cried one voice.

"To my mind, the most amazing film I've ever seen," said another.

"I really didn't think he'd pull it off!"

"Did you see the bit where Vader slaughters the senate while they flee to their shuttles, to that haunting music? Wow."

"How about the surprise guest starring of Bill Bailey as the endearingly inept accountant?"

"What about the night of the long knives type affair, where Palpatine in a Michael Corleone sort of way arranges the deaths of all his rivals in a montage that would make Copola weep with jealousy?"

"And the way the wookies actually lose the forest planet battle, and there's that Spartacus style moment at the end, and they end up in slavery. That made me cry."

"What about the scene where Yoda's incompetence is revealed, and he has this ghastly guilty look about him, that his arrogance has destroyed the jedi - and THAT is the reason why Obi Wan Kenobi goes into hiding, because he can't stand to be near him anymore."

"What about the bit where Natalie Portman is strangled by Anakin, because Jar Jar in a surprising development of his character into an Iago figure, convinces him that she has been unfaithful..."

Me: "So. This is your second viewing, then?"

Them: "Yes! Who would have thought it!? Episode Three is a masterpiece with a series of shockingly grim twists!"

Me: "First viewing for me. Damn."

Them: "Then let us regale you with more scenes! What about the bit where R2D2 is revealed to have ORIGINALLY delivered the Death Star plans to Anakin, hence Vader? What an ironic role reversal!"

Me: "I shall kill you. All."

A nightmare scenario, I'm sure you shall all agree.

Which is why to look at movie threads about Serenity detailing the exploits of those who have seen it is criminally insane. I made the mistake. I found one spoiler unhidden by some blackguard. It annoyed me mightily. That's the thing about the internet community, it only takes one to blow the gaff.

So: I'd like this thread to be the warning thread. Post here if:

A: You want to rant and complain in comedy fashion about the evil nature of spoilers.

B: You want to post a thread title or website title with a big warning that it has visible, unmarked spoilers. This is so people can swing by here first if they want to check movie news, and be sure that their source won't be contaminated. If we could make a list of safe and unsafe sites about the film, that would be great.

C: Pleas to Moderators about trolls who delight in flinging out spoilers. Doubt there will be any, and some may be honest, ignorant mistakes - but still.

I know this all sounds a bit over the top, but then I was spoiled about Six Sense before I went to see it.

By my mum, ironically.

Depriving me of much enjoyment, as you can imagine.

Thanks for listening to me wibble,

Pete

P.S: I have little faith Episode 3 will be genius by the way, that's just my little odd fantasy above there.

"If you can keep your head whilst others... eurgh! Ack! I've spilt my ink! Ugh! Ink on my trousers! Agh! Ink on my shirt! My only hope! The window! Aieeeeee!" (Falls to death)
- Jonathan Nash

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Saturday, February 19, 2005 7:07 AM

HEB

It might seem kind of obvious but really, really avoid all the 'I've seen the movie' threads.

I promise you you'll want to see the movie unspoiled. It's not like the series where spoilers didn;t matter. In the film they really will ruin the experience.

...................
Well, my sister's a ship... we had a
complicated childhood
.................
I wear the cheese. It does not wear me.

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Saturday, February 19, 2005 7:31 AM

NERVOUSPETE

Quote:
Originally posted by heb:
It might seem kind of obvious but really, really avoid all the 'I've seen the movie' threads.

I promise you you'll want to see the movie unspoiled. It's not like the series where spoilers didn;t matter. In the film they really will ruin the experience.

...................
Well, my sister's a ship... we had a
complicated childhood
.................
I wear the cheese. It does not wear me.

After opening the mail, having a nice cheese and pickle bap and playing Darwinia a bit whilst listening to DJ Shadow, I am a lot calmer.

And your advice is laden with sense. I shall avoid.

What a fool I was, eh? Fortuantely it chimed in with a personal theory, and so wasn't a complete shock. Anyway, yes... I change my mind! Avoid those film threads, people!

Though for the sneakier manifestations of spoilers in seemingly innocent threads, maybe a warning here?

Pete

"If you can keep your head whilst others... eurgh! Ack! I've spilt my ink! Ugh! Ink on my trousers! Agh! Ink on my shirt! My only hope! The window! Aieeeeee!" (Falls to death)
- Jonathan Nash

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Saturday, February 19, 2005 7:45 AM

HEB

There's more to the movie than the particular thing you may or may not know. You'll still enjoy it if you think you know what I think you do. Honestly.

As much as I don't want you to leave maybe you should give some consideration to avoiding this site if spoilers bother you as much as they do me. I was planning on giving up this site when the trailer came out until I got to see it early. Just a thought.

heb

...................
Well, my sister's a ship... we had a
complicated childhood
.................
I wear the cheese. It does not wear me.

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Saturday, February 19, 2005 9:02 AM

CASUALTY

Quote:
Originally posted by heb:
It might seem kind of obvious but really, really avoid all the 'I've seen the movie' threads.

I promise you you'll want to see the movie unspoiled. It's not like the series where spoilers didn;t matter. In the film they really will ruin the experience.

Too bloody late!

I wrote my Blog on this a while ago, and after a few weeks of spoiler free enjoyment on this site I am feeling much happier about the whole situation.

That may be just because I have spent the last two weeks working on my 'Selective Amnesia Potion'. It's just about ready. I hope it doesn't make me forget that I didn't want to know anything! Help!

"If nothing we do means anything then the only thing that means anything is what we do"

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Saturday, February 19, 2005 11:07 AM

NERVOUSPETE

Quote:

Too bloody late!

I wrote my Blog on this a while ago, and after a few weeks of spoiler free enjoyment on this site I am feeling much happier about the whole situation.

That may be just because I have spent the last two weeks working on my 'Selective Amnesia Potion'. It's just about ready. I hope it doesn't make me forget that I didn't want to know anything! Help!

"If nothing we do means anything then the only thing that means anything is what we do"

Great! I know, I'll drink a measure to forget I've ever seen Firefly, that way I can enjoy the season afresh all over again! Hand me the shot glass...

*JUDDER*

That was refreshing.

Casualty: "So, are you going to watch Firefly again?"

Firefly, what's that?

Casualty: "You know. Your favourite TV series."

No it isn't.

Casualty: "It's set in space but it's a western."

Pft! Why would I want to watch something like that?

Casualty: "Gngh. The conversion must start entirely afresh."

*****

Heb! You may have a point, though it would be a hard exile to bear. I think I'll hover around the Neil Gaiman website instead, and knock my Fireflyfans.net viewing on the head for a little while.

Maybe.

Pete

"If you can keep your head whilst others... eurgh! Ack! I've spilt my ink! Ugh! Ink on my trousers! Agh! Ink on my shirt! My only hope! The window! Aieeeeee!" (Falls to death)
- Jonathan Nash

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