Mal sat at the com, looking wryly at the plastic assortment before him. No wonder Wash was always playing with these. Flying normally is boring! He knew he’d be in deep trouble if he even suggested removing the dinosaurs, but there was a part of him that figured it would happen sooner or later. Chances of getting a pilot who would put up with such foolishness are slim. His mind was already racing on to thinking of the qualities he would have to ask for and hopefully not have to reveal that his last pilot was staked through the chest by the gorram Reavers. Although, to be fair, it wasn’t exactly his fault, he still felt responsible. If the true culprits were to be blamed, it would be the Alliance for not only thinking that they knew best but trying to enforce that ideal upon everyone else, regardless of nature. Mal thought of himself as honest, dependable and trustworthy, but in fighting against this government, he almost felt like he had to be a crook. In his mind, he wasn’t just resisting for himself, but for everyone who ever dared to stand up and say, “I want my life, and if I make a mistake that doesn’t make me a bad person or unworthy. I want the right to lie and cheat and steal- being punished for it, sure, but having the ability to make the choice to do it in the first place.” A voice spoke out of the darkness. “People still have that right, Mal. They just don’t want to be cast out of society for exercising it.” He jumped a little, but then collected himself. “You sure do have a way of sneaking up on people.” River shrugged. “I’ve talked to everyone else I care to. Now I thought I’d watch you crash Serenity into the Training House.” Mal scowled. “That’s not funny. I’m not that stupid when it comes to flying.” “You will be if you don’t correct your attitude thrusters.” Mal looked down and saw she was right. “Well, I’ll be a….how did you know that?” River patted the bulkhead with a fond look. “She told me so herself.” Mal did not doubt that one bit. He’d come to the place that if River told him the planet they were about to land on spoke to her, he’d just about believe it. “Anything else, little one?” She looked at him with those all-knowing eyes of hers and simply nodded. “You’ll see. Sometimes, knowing is not enough. Sometimes, you just have to do.” Mal was confused, but he decided that concentration was needed in order to land his baby BY the Training House rather than plowing through it. No sooner had the landing gear locked into place, but River sidled up behind him and tied a cloth ‘round his face. He thought maybe she was exhibiting a bit of play, so he didn’t struggle against it at first. But when no surprise was forthcoming, he began to get suspicious…..and then he started laughing and rolling on the deck…then darkness claimed his consciousness. River stood objectively over him and removed the cloth. “Hey, muscles, your turn!” Jayne came in, grumbling. “Mal ain’t gonna like this when he realizes what we done.” “Not at first, but I’m fairly certain we’ll be forgiven.” she rejoined merrily. He hauled Mal into his arms and stood by for a sec as River went to alert Kaylee- after all, wouldn’t do for Inara to be awake to realize what they was up to- and she would for sure notice the whole crew muckin’ about with the spare shuttle. Jayne grumbled to himself as he awaited the signal that would tell him it was clear to proceed.

Kaylee stood outside Inara’s shuttle, her hands shaking as she pondered the cloth in front of her. She turned hurt eyes to Simon and said, “You’re sure this ain’t gonna hurt her or nuthin’, right? I don’t wanna be a party to that.” Simon cupped her cheek gently. “Unless you’d like to try it out on me first, you’re going to have to trust me. I promise that the drug won’t hurt her. If she’s sitting, the chances of her being hurt as she passes out lessen greatly.” “Then I’ll just have to make sure she lands on somethin’ soft.” Kaylee seemed to visibly gather her courage as she strode into Inara’s shuttle. “ ‘Nara? You in here?” “Kaylee, honey, you come to see me off?” She nodded, and remembered the fib Zoe gave her to use. “I brought ya a present…one of them fancy handkerchiefs. The vendor sprayed it with some expensive cologne that he was tryin’ to sell. If I’d had the creds….” Inara smiled at Kaylee’s consternation, thinking it was her inability to get a better present that was bothering her. “Stop fussing, mei-mei. It’s a beautiful handkerchief, and I’m sure the perfume is lovely, too.” She took the delicate white cloth from Kaylee’s unresisting hands and brought it to her nose in a long, fluid gesture. It smelled…funny. She sniffed again, trying to identify the unfamiliar scent. She couldn’t help it! It was so weird-smelling, she had to laugh….as she bent over to regain her breath, she fell over sideways on the floor in a blissful slumber. Kaylee stood with tears brimming in her eyes and started to stroke Inara’s hair. “Oh, Nara…I wish there’d been another way. I’m really sorry.” Jayne, having deposited Mal none too gently on the floor of the second shuttle, stood framed in the doorway. “Aw, hell, Kaylee. It ain’t like ya killed her.” “I know, Jayne…it just feels like such a betrayal.” With a rare glimpse of sympathy, Jayne gently gathered Inara into his arms. “Sometimes life hands ya things ya gotta do that you don’t wanna. Welcome to growin’ up, little one. You still got a job to do.” Kaylee nodded distractedly and headed toward the engine room to retrieve her toolbox. When she returned to the shuttle area, she found Zoe and Jayne stoically stocking the shuttle with protein and water provisions—enough for a month, it seemed. Kaylee looked at them, bewildered. Zoe gave her a no-nonsense look in reply. “I fully recognize that Mal is a hard-headed pain in the ass and Inara’s pretty set in her ways. I want to make sure that they aren’t gonna starve. They may kill each other, but it won’t be our fault for not takin’ care of ‘em.” Kaylee set to work and a few hours later had a lock installed on the shuttle door that would only open from the outside. “Zoe, I also rigged it so’s they’re locked to the ship and can’t fly off.” Zoe shot her an admiring glance. “We’ll make a criminal out of you yet, little sister.” With one, last longing look; Kaylee slid the door shut with a “thud” that rang of finality. “Now it’s up to them.” said Zoe. “Let’s see what happens.” River shot her an ironic look. “Just be prepared to buy several bushels of apples when this mess is over, ok?” Quiet settled over Serenity as the reluctant wardens stood watch over their unconscious charges. About an hour after the door was sealed, they heard stirring behind it. Zoe flashed a grateful look at the heavens that the plan had worked thus far and everything seemed to be in place. She heard some fumbling behind the door and then a scraping as an obvious attempt was made to open the door. “What in the seven hells?” Mal bellowed. “Somebody get over here and let me out of this gorram shuttle!” “Nothing doin’, Captain.” Zoe returned, as cool and calm as ever on the outside, but inwardly gloating. “You ain’t goin’ nowhere till you take care of the problem we put in there with you.” “What are you blabbering about, Zoe? There isn’t nuthin’ in here but me and those cots….holy go-se, what happened to Inara?” “She’ll be fine, Mal. We just gassed the two of you so’s you’d have to have a little conversation. You just woke up first.” Mal grumbled to himself, under his breath….something about skinning her alive when he got outta this mess…and Zoe replied, just as if she’d heard every word. “Cap’n, I don’t care if you use my skin for a set of new tight pants as long as we all ain’t gotta walk on pins and needles around you two. As soon as Inara comes ‘round, I wanna hear some discoursing, dong ma?” She walked away and went to enjoy some time in the sunshine with the rest of the crew. She just hoped that she wouldn’t return to find carnage littering the floor of the shuttle.

Mal sat on the cot across from Inara, having the rare pleasure of just staring at her to his heart’s content. He knew how he felt about her, and he knew it was wrong….but how do you stop your heart from longing after the unattainable? You might as well ask how to undo the past. Melancholy and pensive, he stared inwardly at his own private galaxy of thoughts. Soon, Inara stirred…woke…and screamed. “Mal! What the heck do you mean by sneaking in on me when I’m sleeping? Don’t you have any decency? Why I oughta….” Inara belatedly looked around. “Wait a minute. This isn’t my shuttle.” “Brilliant deduction, Ms. Holmes. We’re in the spare.” “How the heck did we get in here? And why aren’t we leaving?” “As to the how…” Mal shrugged. “The other part’s easy enough. The door’s locked, and we seem to be unable to take off from the landing platform. We’re not going anywhere.” “Terrific! Those girls are expecting me by now! What in the name of Buddha’s belly am I supposed to do?” “Well according to my soon-to-be-former first mate, we’re stuck, and we’re gonna STAY that way until we hash out the differences between us. They seem to have left us plenty of provisions, so that won’t be a problem.” “Mal, how are we supposed to do that? You know that we can’t have a civil conversation for longer than five minutes. Either that or you deliberately rile me by calling me a…” “Whore?” Mal supplied mirthlessly. “Yes.” Inara glared, but realizing the situation, directed her anger at Zoe and the crew. “When we get out of this….” “Oh, I’m right there on the same page with you, sweetheart.” Mal drawled sarcastically. “But since we’re stuck for the time being….why don’t you tell me just what I did that pisses you off so much?” Inara glared at him scathingly. “What did you do? You have the NERVE to ask me that after all the insults and insinuations, the places that you’ve taken me to and I’ve had to get us out of? What did you DO?” Mal raised his hands defensively. “Ok, I know I’ve gotten us into some pretty pickles that you got us out of, but…hell, ‘Nara! Nobody asked you to be so generous as to save our hides without compensation. Iffen you wanted paid for your time and effort, all you had to do was say so!” Inara’s eyes flashed fire as Mal finished his statement. She growled to herself under her breath. “You wouldn’t know what to do if life came with a how-to book, you lumbering Neanderthal!” Mal shot right back, “Oh yeah? Well, you wouldn’t be so ruttin’ full of yourself if it weren’t for that rotten, no-good Companion trainin’ you went through!” “I didn’t have a choice! You think I WANTED to sell my body to the highest bidder?” “Seems to me you coulda got out of it anytime you freakin’ wanted to!” “Well, that’s just not how it was, you lumbering DOLT!” They both jumped at pounding that came from the doorway. Kaylee yelled through it, “Do I need to come in there and separate you two? Mal, don’t you dare raise a hand to her….or…or…or I’ll fire the engines right in your face the next time you check the exhaust flows! And ‘Nara! You know callin’ the Captain names don’t do no good except to get him riled up. Now….calm down….both of you.” Heavy silence ensued. Both Mal and Inara were breathing heavily, glaring at each other. Finally, Mal gestured to the cot, wordlessly inviting Inara to sit down and have a decent conversation. Inara fiddled with her shawl. “Mal, you ever wonder why I didn’t stay on Sihnon…and why I won’t go back there?” Mal nodded, afraid to break their tenuous truce with flippant words. “Fact of the matter is, Mal, I met someone. Someone an awful lot like you- and he broke my heart and left it in a million pieces. I slept with him before I became a Companion, and his possessive nature drove me from my home and a place where I could have been a real public figure. It was all lost because I trusted in love.” Mal seemed speechless. Then, he lifted his head, “You don’t really want to talk about it, do you?” Inara shook her head wordlessly, harboring the hurt inside as she had so many times before. Mal continued. “Well, I don’t suppose you’d tell me that ding tzete fui do’s name so I can challenge HIM to a duel?” Inara laughed.