A/N: Again, I am being overly generous - but here is chapter 12 for all you loyal and verbose readers!

LEAVE COMMENTS - I'm not kidding!

Much, much thanks to Leiasky - the best beta in the 'verse - and a troublemaker if I ever met one (you can blame her for the 350 page sequel I recently finished and the idea to write a third installment as well - although I am a fan of trilogies, it's true). But thanks anyway!

***

A NEW LIFE, ch. 12: Tangled Webs

***

It took Inara and Zoe a few days to get away from their own assignments and back on board. River had taken the ship back into space, certain that they were safer in the black than on land. Once both women had brought the shuttles back home, River quickly put the firefly on auto-pilot, hurrying from her seclusion on the bridge to reach her brother. His confusion and increasing discomfort were calling out to her like a siren and she knew that as the crew finally saw him, finally started to make their demands on his memory, he would start spiraling out of control and fast.

The captain and Jayne had left him be for these past few days and River had silently said a prayer. Simon was already withdrawn enough and she knew that the captain, in his rush to get the doctor back that he could remember, the one Kaylee loved, would push and that would only cause Simon to pull further into himself; further away from her.

She met him in the galley. He was sitting at the large table, having decided he was tired of staring at the blank walls of his bunk. Jayne was there as well, sitting across the room in one of the easy chairs. At her entrance he sat up slightly, ready to go to her, but with a quick shake of the head, she stopped his motion. Sullenly, Jayne sank back against the cushions and decided this perch was as good as any to watch the coming show.

Inara entered on Mal’s arm, Zoe following. At the sound of their entrance, Simon looked to them, and River followed his gaze, watching as Inara visibly trembled at the sight. She had seen him once already of course, at the party, but now, seeing him back on board made this whole unbelievable situation more real. Mal steadied his girl with a hand to the small of the back and she smiled her thanks to him.

Taking a deep breath, she decided to approach Simon, extending a cultured hand. “Simon, it’s good to see you again.”

With dead eyes, Simon regarded her outstretched hand, and shook it weakly. Dropping his gaze back to the tabletop, he said quietly, “I’ve already seen you once. You were at the Anderson’s Estate.”

Inara nodded, looking up quickly to study River’s reaction. But the young woman was not looking to Inara, instead all of her attention, all of her energy was focused on her broken brother sitting before her. Inara’s heart again swelled with concern, this time for River as well.

“Yes, I was there. As were River and Jayne.” She admitted the truth, seeing no reason at this point to keep anything from him. He was different, she had noticed that from just their brief meeting a little over a week ago, and now, with the truth of his situation finally out in the open, he looked even more dour than before. His face, which had once held a smooth youthfulness, belied his stress and the weight of the situation. Sitting next to him, Inara thought about placing a comforting hand to his shoulder, but decided against it. It would do nothing to relieve his tension, she knew that. Only time could take away the strain of this situation, this betrayal, and she had no control over that fickle construct. “We are very glad to have you back home,” she finally added, keeping her voice calm, even.

With a grunt, Simon rose abruptly, backing into the chair with a force great enough to knock it over. As it clattered to the floor, he looked to all of them with haunted, angry eyes and bit out, “This isn’t my home,” before stalking from the room.

All of them stood or sat in silence as his quick footsteps faded. Mal was worried about Kaylee, now that the doc was alive, worried that this broken boy that had rescued would only serve to break her heart for good. Inara wished she had the power, the unenviable power to bring Simon back from the brink of his despair, knowing that she didn’t. Zoe too thought of Kaylee, and how devastated she herself would be if she ever found Wash, alive and well, and completely oblivious to who she was.

Jayne watched River. The girl had not moved since her brother’s startling exit, but he could see her struggle to contain her emotions, struggle to keep herself from yelling out strings of curse words that even he would be hard-pressed to challenge. He knew she was fighting a fierce internal battle to keep it together, for the sake of her brother. And he hated it. Hated it, because there wasn’t a gorram thing he could do about it – and River wouldn’t have let him, even if he’d tried.

At that last thought, she raised her head and brought her big brown eyes to regard him. The look was so intense, his breath caught in his throat and now he did move towards her, ignoring the warning look she gave him, the look that was pleading with him to stay where he was. But he didn’t give a damn, not at this moment. If there was one thing, he hated it was to see her in pain, especially now, especially now that he’d realized, he wanted to do everything in his power to insulate her from that kind of hurt.

He was to her side in an instant, and before she could shrug away from him, he’d wrapped a strong arm around her shoulder. She tensed for a second and then with a heavy sigh, leaned against his side, taking what little comfort she could in his presence. Jayne immediately felt himself relax, just a bit.

“Now what,” Mal asked simply, turning weary, but relieved eyes in her direction.

Shrugging, she answered, “We get him to Kaylee. I think she’s the only person who can bring back the rest of his memory.”

Mal sucked in a breath between clenched teeth, throwing a concerned gaze to Inara. They had discussed that possibility, however briefly and neither of them liked the idea of causing Kaylee more pain. Telling her about Simon could only lead to more heartache, especially when there was no guarantee the boy would remember her.

“Yeah, what about his memory,” Zoe asked quietly, raising her eyes to take in River’s consistently quizzical look. “Do we even know what they did to him? I mean, couldn’t he be-“

“Like me,” River finished for her, speaking with none of the emotion she felt. “You’re afraid of him, afraid he’ll snap, be a killer.” When no one contradicted her, River pulled away from Jayne, her chest heaving from the anger she felt. “He won’t, he can’t. He’s Simon,” she told them plaintively, begging them to hear her. “He’s not capable of that much destruction.”

“Neither were you darlin’ fore the Alliance got their grubby, blue mitts on ya,” Jayne countered. Backing further from his touch, she looked to Mal, hoping he would be on her side. But she saw no sign of support from him.

“He’s got a point, lil’ one,” Mal said tiredly, wishing he didn’t have to say these things, wishing he didn’t have to see the pain on River’s face. “We don’t know who or what did this.”

“No, but we can find out.”

Simon’s voice startled them all and River turned at the sound, running to him and throwing her arms around him. “Tell them,” she whispered, burying her face in the crook of his neck. “Tell them you’re not dangerous.”

Hugging her back, Simon wished he felt as certain of himself as she did. But the truth was no one, least of all him, had any idea who or what had messed with his mind. And until they found out, the crew’s concern was a very real one.

Pulling her back slightly, Simon looked into her eyes and smiled slightly. “I can’t tell them that, mei mei.” The use of his nickname for her made River’s heart swell. “Because I don’t know.”

Looking back to them all, he thought for a moment of apologizing for his rudeness before, but who was he kidding? These people obviously did not stand on ceremony and he didn’t owe them a thing, apologies included. Swallowing past the discomfort his own rudeness churned in his gut, he dropped an arm around his sister’s shoulder as he addressed the captain. “Captain, you have a point. You all do,” he said, letting his gaze encompass the room. “I have no idea what’s happened to me. And until I find out … well, let’s just say, I have to know who would do this and why.”

Mal nodded once, not at all surprised at Simon’s conviction or his forceful tone. The boy had always thought he could give orders on Mal’s ship. “Well, that’s fine and dandy, son, but how you propose we get them answers? We can’t exactly go waltzin’ back home to ask ma and pa.”

Simon grimaced, knowing the captain was right. His parents had to have known what was happening. Whether or not they had a hand in it was another matter entirely, but to knowingly keep his sister from him – whatever their reasoning, Simon found it unforgivable. Looking to River once more, he saw that she had stopped crying and he was grateful for that. He hated it when she cried, always had.

“I have an idea,” he said slowly, knowing this was not going to go over well, but at a loss for any other option. “But we’ve got to move fast.”

***

It had been three days since Simon had been taken by his sister. Alicia still could barely wrap her head around the concept. She had taken leave from work, unable to go back to the hospital, unable to even leave her apartment. Nothing made sense anymore and until the world did again, she wasn’t stepping foot outside of her domain.

So when her comm beeped to alert her to an incoming wave she seriously considered not answering it, but knowing that it could be an emergency, and honestly, a little grateful for the outside contact, she answered the call.

Her breath caught in her throat and Alicia was glad she was sitting, certain she would have fainted otherwise. Simon’s bright blue eyes and strong jaw stared back at her and she couldn’t breathe at the sight. Ai ya, how she’d missed him.

“Simon,” she whispered, still uncertain the person she saw was real.

“It’s me, Ally,” he told her, his voice softening as he saw the shock register on her features. This wasn’t fair, he knew that, not to her. But he needed help and there was no one else to turn to.

“Are you all right,” she asked hurriedly, her eyes scanning every part of him she could see, looking for signs of distress. “Are you hurt? Where are you?”

Holding up a hand, Simon tried to belay her fears. “I’m fine, Ally, really, but I don’t have a lot of time. I need you to do me a favor, a big one.”

Taking a deep breath, she considered telling him no and ending the connection. But she knew she couldn’t. Her feelings for him were still strong, no matter what he thought. She could at least give him the courtesy of hearing him out. “What is it?”

Sighing slightly at her willingness to entertain the idea, Simon said slowly, “I never would ask this of you if it weren’t extremely important, you have to know that,” he stressed, still trying to work up the courage to ask her for help. “And if I thought there was any other way, I would take it. But there’s not and I-“

It was Alicia’s turn to interrupt. “Simon, out with it.”

He smiled tightly at her command and then obliged. “I need to know what they did to me. All of it. If I have a sister I couldn’t remember, then there’s a chance there’s a lot more buried there. And I want those memories back.” Bringing his eyes up to hold her gaze, she felt the intensity burning in them, even through the wave. “I need those memories back.”

She now knew that whatever he asked would be big and possibly dangerous. But she didn’t care; maybe if she could talk with him again, just for a minute, he’d see that leaving his life on Osiris behind, leaving her behind, was foolish. That a sister could not outweigh all his life was meant to be. Maybe he would come back. “What do you want me to do?”

“I need to get to a neural imager,” he told her, biting his lip in anticipation of her response. “And I need you to do the scan.”

Sighing heavily, and rubbing a hand over her face, Alicia looked back to the screen and asked, “And I’m guessing, we can’t use the hospital’s?”

“Not on Osiris,” Simon agreed. “But we could meet on Ariel.”

She nodded once. “Sure, I did my residency there. I still know a few people. It shouldn’t be too much trouble.” Rising, she moved to pack a bag. “I can be on Ariel in twelve hours. Where will I meet you?”

Looking off screen, Simon seemed to confer silently with someone and then turned back to her with an answer. “We’ll find you.”

She thought about fighting him on it, telling him that unless he started being upfront with her she would back out now, but she couldn’t. She had to know if this life of Simon’s he could not remember was really the one he wanted to live. “Fine.”

“Alicia.” Simon’s voice stayed her hand as she moved to terminate the link. “Don’t trust any one. And don’t tell anyone where you’re going, please.”

The fear in his eyes chilled her heart. He was serious, and considering her earlier conversation with Keller she couldn’t really blame him. There was more going on here than she knew. “I won’t. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Thank you,” he managed to get out, before she cut off the link. Taking a deep breath and swallowing past a lump in her throat Alicia wondered when and how her life had gotten so complicated. Could Simon really be harboring suppressed memories of an entire life? Could he really think that his best friend or his parents had had a hand in this?

Again, these were questions she couldn’t answer and Alicia hoped that in a day’s time, she might be able to.

***

River knew that Simon was feeling the weight of his unremembered life. She had watched as he’d struggled to ask such a huge favor of his friend, knowing that the girl would say yes, because she was in love with her brother. And Simon knew that to, and the thought that he had taken advantage of that relationship or his own gain was causing him to feel more conflicted than just a few hours before.

Searching for him now, River went to his old room, thinking perhaps he had remembered something. Sliding the door open, she found him asleep and she was relieved. She was pretty sure he had not slept much the past few days on Osiris and for the past few days he’d been back on Serenity, he’d been too wound up to truly relax. But as she watched him sleep soundly now, River felt a wave of relief that she had not felt for almost a year. It had been almost a year since he’d been taken off this ship and now he was finally back, back home.

Feeling strong arms encircle her waist, River leaned back into Jayne’s chest, taking comfort in the embrace. He had tried to keep his distance over these past few days, knowing the two siblings needed time and that the only way Simon was going to be able to regain any semblance of a normal life was if he was slowly eased back into it all. But that didn’t mean Jayne had forgotten about her.

Pressing a kiss to her temple as they swayed slightly back and forth, Jayne whispered, “You all right?”

“Mmm,” she murmured in answer, and then stepped forward to close her brother’s door. Turning in Jayne’s embrace, she slid her arms around his neck and stepped onto her tiptoes to bring her mouth within a breath of his. “Am now,” she whispered. Leaning the rest of the way, she kissed him, feeling his want and desire for her as he pulled her tighter against him and ran his hands up her back and into her hair. She sighed into the kiss, feeling unbelievably light as he lifted her from the ground, causing her feet to dangle as their lips continued to explore, their tongues soon joining the dance of passion that was about to envelope them.

Pulling back slightly, Jayne was trying to say something, but River’s lips trailed kisses from his mouth down his neck and back around to his ear. Growling at her unbelievably light, but maddening touch, Jayne kissed at her neck, nipping gently at the skin there and getting a shudder from her in the process. Smiling wickedly, he continued to work his lips along her shoulder and back to her neck, tracing the curve of her jaw was his mouth. She giggled as the stubble he’d allow to grow back tickled her neck just below her chin and he set her down gently as he placed a final kiss on her lips. Snuggling into him, she wished she could stay like this forever, safe and protected. Despite all Jayne had ever done and all he would one day do, he was a good man who tried to do what was best, even when the odds were clearly stacked against him.

“I think it’s a good thing your brother don’t ‘member me,” he whispered into her hair, his hands still rubbing up and down her back soothingly.

“Why,” she asked, a smile gracing her features.

“'Cause, if he caught us kissin’, I’d be lookin’ at some fairly unpleasant time in the airlock.”

Laughing again, River swatted at him playfully and then with a wicked glint in her eye, pinched his arm lightly and said, “That can still be arranged.”

Swallowing his laughter, Jayne leaned down to give her another kiss, wishing he could take her smiles and bottle them whole.

***

Kaylee rocked baby Daniel to and fro, trying to get him to close those little eyes and get some sleep. He was only three weeks old and truth was, he was a good baby. He slept for pretty long stretches of time and was easy to feed, suckling like a champ whenever it was time for some grub. He was perfect.

And he was hers. Kaylee felt such joy at having him, at being able to hold him when he cried, at being able to care for him. It brought a sense of peace to her heart that she’d thought would be forever gone once Simon had been taken from her and she was so glad that Daniel had managed to fill a little part of that emptiness.

As his eyes drifted closed, Kaylee risked taking a seat in the rocking chair. Sitting gingerly, she leaned back and started to sway once she realized he would not awaken at the change in position. She was almost asleep herself, her son cuddled against her chest when she heard the slightest sound in the door.

Turning to see who her visitor was, she saw the small blonde head and bright brown eyes peeking around the door and knew it was Ellie. “Well, come ‘ere, lil’ one,” she whispered, doing her best not to wake her son.

Smiling brightly as she approached, Ellie came to her, her pace an exaggerated tiptoe that made Kaylee smile with delight. Looking first into the little bundle in her lap and than to Kaylee, the little girl breathed, “Oh, Miss Kaylee, he’s so bootiful.”

Kaylee smiled wider at her assessment, and said, “He is, ain’t he?”

Ellie smiled at her again and was content to stare down at the newest addition to their household. After a few minutes of silence, Ellie asked, “Miss Kaylee, don’t you wanna go?”

Puzzled by the girl’s question, Kaylee reached out a hand to tuck a stray hair behind her ear. “Whatda ya mean, baby?”

Looking to her with wide eyes, Ellie said, “Don’tcha wanna go be with your fam’ly? You got one, right?”

Kaylee’s eyes immediately filled with tears at the girl’s question. She had been thinking a lot about her family lately, both her families actually, ever since Daniel’d been born. She had thought about waving her folks and she knew she would eventually. She had an even stronger desire to wave Serenity, to let River know that she was now an aunt, to show off her perfect baby son to Mal and Inara and Zoe and even Jayne. But fear and continued heartache had stilled her hand. She had left them with little thought for their feelings or the repercussions and she couldn’t be sure of the reaction she’d receive. And now, only a week out from having her own little Simon, she could not risk a rejection like that – her emotions were still too unruly.

“Yes, baby,” Kaylee finally answered the girl, blinking back her tears. “Yes, I gotta family. I have two families, actually.”

The girl’s eyes widened even farther as she breathed, “Wow.”

Kaylee smiled at her again and waited as she saw another question rise to her lips. “So what’re you still doing here?”

Kaylee thought about it for a moment more and wasn’t sure there was any answer she could give to the little girl that she’d be able to understand. Finally, she shrugged slightly and took another look at her son, and said, “’Cause sometimes, no matter how much people love ya, there’s some things you gotta do for yerself.”

Ellie didn’t have an answer for that, so she simply gazed back down to Daniel for a few more moments. Then as quietly as she’d come she headed to leave. Kaylee watched her go, and saw as she paused in the doorway. Turning back to face the new mother, Ellie told her with all sincerity, “Miss Kaylee, I’m glad you’re here.”

Fighting back more tears, Kaylee answered, “Me too, sweetie.” The girl left and she again turned her attention back to Daniel, running a gentle hand over the soft hair on his head. “Me too.”

***

“She’s down,” River said knowingly, glancing back to read Mal’s troubled gaze. Of course, she didn’t have to look at her captain to know he was worried. She could feel his anxiety roiling off him in waves.

Trying to suppress the concern that swirled in him, River stood and headed for the cargo bay. “Time to go.”

Mal followed her, suppressing his grimace at her certainty that she would be accompanying her brother on this mission. But, he surely wasn’t going to tell the girl that she had to stay on board the ship while Simon went to find out what happened to his top three percent brain.

Simon’s nervousness was almost as bad as the captain’s, and River again tried to block it out as they entered the cavernous room. Walking up beside him and slipping her hand in his, she looked up at him and whispered, “Don’t worry. We’ll make it.”

Glancing furtively to the captain, Mal could only shrug at the younger man as he came to stand next to Inara. “Sorry, son, but I sure ain’t tellin’ her.”

Looking between them both, her own concern on the rise, River stepped back from her brother. Her eyes accusatory, she asked, “Tell me what?”

“River,” Simon began slowly, placing both hands on her shoulders. “You can’t come.”

Certain she had misheard him, she asked, “What?”

“It’s too dangerous, mei mei, you know that.” She could see Simon’s fear for her safety, reflected in his eyes, but she didn’t care. There was no way he was leaving this ship without her – not again.

“No, Simon, I’m going with you. I can help,” she reminded him, thinking for a fleeting moment that perhaps he hadn’t yet remembered how deadly she could be in a fight. “I have to stay with you.”

“No, River, you don’t,” Simon told her sadly, pulling her to him and hugging her tightly. “Not for this. Once I’m back, we can spend as much time together as you want. But we can’t go waltzing into an Ariel hospital together, not again.” She looked up and saw the flash of memory in his eyes as he thought of the last time they had been here. When Simon had finally discovered just how damaged his little sister was. When they’d almost been taken, because of Jayne.

As if reading her mind, she saw Jayne shift uncomfortably from the corner of her eye, and watched in mild surprise as he looked over at the two siblings and then quietly left the room. Mal watched him go as well and considered calling him back, but decided that maybe now was not the best time for a showdown with his mercenary.

“Then who,” River asked, pulling back from her brother. “Who’s going with you?”

“I am, lil’ one,” Zoe answered, stepping forward. Her trusty sidearm was at her hip and River knew that if anyone could protect her brother, it was the warrior woman.

Nodding once in approval, River stepped back from Simon after giving him a light kiss on the cheek. “Be safe,” she instructed, and, hiding tears, she turned and ran from the room.

“Watch after her for me,” Simon asked as he turned to Mal and Inara. “Please.”

Stepping forward, Mal clapped a hand on the man’s shoulder and said, “Always have son, always will.”

Simon nodded once and then glanced to Zoe. Seeing that she was ready, they headed off the ship to meet Alicia. Simon’s stomach began to turn more readily the farther they got from the firefly. He knew that whatever they discovered in the next few hours would either be inconsequential or of the highest import. At this point, he honestly didn’t know which he’d prefer.

***

Being accosted at work was not a pleasant feeling. And as Keller’s cheek was ground into the wall of his office, his arm pinned securely and painfully behind his back, he had to admit, he had to agree with that assessment.

“Whatda ya want,” he asked angrily, his voice muffled as his lips were smashed to the wall.

It was Gabriel Tam’s voice that hissed in his ear. “Where is he?”

Trying to suppress the eye roll he felt coming on, Keller tried to shift out of the man’s grasp and was only given a sharp pain for his trouble. “I don’t know. Alicia said he was taken a few days ago.”

Releasing him, Gabriel watched as he turned. If he was going to kill the rodent before him, he’d much rather do it to his face. “A few days ago,” he spat, his anger burning in him like a volcano. “Why didn’t you contact me?”

“Look, Gabe, Alicia ain’t the most reliable source,” he said, rubbing his shoulder from where it had made contact with the wall. “I thought maybe she was just overreacting or something. I was going to tell you.” It was of course a lie. Keller had been scouring Capitol City for the past four days looking for his friend, praying he’d find him somewhere, anywhere, so he wouldn’t have to die a slow, agonizing death. But for all his searching, he had nothing to show for it.

“That’s bull,” Gabriel told him, advancing on the man and forcing him against the wall. “You were trying to save your own ass!”

“Language, Mister Tam,” Keller chided, enjoying as he watched a particularly large vein on the man’s head throb rhythmically. “We are in a hospital.”

Reaching out with a strong arm, Gabriel closed his fingers around the other man’s neck. “Good,” he whispered, his face inches from the other. “Because you might need a doctor.” And with that, he started to squeeze.

***

When Gabriel stepped from Keller’s office a few moments later, he looked every inch the respectable citizen and business man he was. Smiling politely at the staff as he passed them on his way out of the building, he waited until he was in his shuttle before contacting the agents. “He’s gone,” he told them, his voice betraying none of his anger. “Find him.”

There was no response, no affirmation that he’d been heard, but Gabriel knew he had. He had put way too much money into the right hands and pockets to be ignored now. He would get his son back, no matter who he had to go through to do it.

***

Getting Simon in and out of the hospital on Ariel was not difficult. Zoe remembered with some fondness the ease with which they had infiltrated the building before and thought for a brief moment of again relieving the place of its medical supplies – they could sure use the money. But that wasn’t the plan. She was here to watch Simon’s back, to get him in and out in one piece. And she sure as hell wasn’t gonna fail; she knew what River’d do if she did.

When they had met up with Alicia, the young woman who would help them, Zoe had not been surprised to find her attractive and obviously in love with the good doctor. Zoe watched as she treated him with care, trying to be supportive without being demanding, trying to dig for information without crossing a line. Simon, to his credit, endured her ministrations but kept his distance, knowing that he had already hurt her enough and didn’t wish to any more.

It wasn’t until they were back on board, half a day later, that Zoe began to see the other girl’s desperation; her desire to hold onto Simon was starting to show and Zoe thought of Kaylee, knowing that if the young mechanic were here, Alicia wouldn’t stand a chance. Or maybe she would, because Simon knew Alicia, but he couldn’t remember Kaylee.

River, Simon and Alicia were standing in the infirmary studying the neural images they had pulled of Simon’s brain. Mal, Zoe and Jayne stood in the doorway, while Inara peered in on the group from her seat on the stairs leading to the galley. She didn’t need to hear them well to know what those scans would say. It was obvious by Simon’s behavior and his tenseness that none of the information would be good.

Alicia’s brow was furrowed in concentration as she continued to study the images before her. As a psychiatrist, she had a lot of experience with this type of information, but what she was looking at now made no sense. There was no reason why any of the cuts or surgeries evident on Simon’s scans should be there. His brain was perfectly healthy, always had been; to do such extensive work to a normal brain was unheard of and medically unethical.

Turning big, brown eyes to her, River told the other girl, “Right and wrong don’t matter. They do what they want.”

Alicia returned the look and then averted her eyes quickly, still unnerved with how much the girl could read thoughts and emotions; it was decidedly unsettling.

Glancing between both women, Simon finally turned back to Alicia. “What is it? What do you see?”

She looked to him then and felt fresh tears well in her eyes. There was no reason for this, no reason for his pain and yet, it was there all the same. And she knew she was powerless to stop it. Clearing her throat, she stepped forward, and pointed at a particularly gnarled region of his left hemisphere. “See this,” she questioned, knowing he did even as he stepped up for a closer look.

Trying to ignore his proximity to her, she continued, “This here, all of it, is neural reconditioning. It’s a fairly new procedure and not recommended for any patient in large doses, but if done correctly, it can work.”

“Work at what,” Mal asked, not really wanting to go through an entire medical lesson to get to the point. “What’s it for?”

Looking to the door way, Alicia held the man’s gaze and said, “Memory augmentation.”

Out of all of them, Mal recovered first. “What?” He demanded his voice tense.

Sighing, Alicia tried to think of how to explain it. It was a new procedure, one she had actually supported, when used for its original purpose. “It’s new, an experimental procedure. The Alliance is trying to use it on criminals. See if they can’t find away to stymie the negative tendencies, reintegrate them back into society.”

Simon turned wide blue eyes on her and she knew he was trying desperately to maintain some control over his disbelief; she could commiserate. “How much?” With quizzical eyes, she looked to him and he restated the question, “How much did they bury?”

Looking back to the scan, Alicia called up a few different angles and noted dark masses of the same on his other hemisphere. “A lot,” she told him finally, unable to quantify it and not at all sure she wanted to.

As all of them tried to digest and process this new information, Mal was able to recover first. “How do we fix it,” he asked the young woman, even as her eyes bore into Simon.

Turning to the older man, she shrugged simply. “You don’t.” At Mal’s shocked expression, she elaborated. “There isn’t a cure for this. It’s irreparable surgery. There are things that can be done to try and recover the lost memories, but unless you have a very clear idea of who or what they involve, it’ll be almost impossible to tap into them.”

Mal swallowed hard, thinking of how much more difficult this entire situation had just become. However, they did have one advantage; they new with absolute certainty what Simon’s parents and the Alliance had been trying to make him forget and they could get it back – all they had to do was get to Kaylee. He was absolutely certain if anyone could help Simon remember, it was her.

“Simon, there’s no reason for this,” she told him, turning to face him and taking his hands in hers. “You were perfectly healthy before this procedure. Whoever did this had no cause. So, why would they?”

Simon couldn’t answer her question. He had his suspicions, but he would have to keep them to himself until he had more evidence, until he knew for sure where to direct his rage. “I don’t know,” he ground out slowly, dropping her hands and stepping away from the screen.

River watched with a forlorn gaze as his mind reeled from this new information. He wanted to hit something, hard, and she thought briefly of egging him into a fight so he could let out some of his frustration, but she knew he would never hit her. And she knew it wouldn’t make him feel any better. “You do know,” she told him, waiting for him to turn to her. When he had, she continued, “Wanted their son back, not a daughter. Wanted you.”

Her eyes cried a few small tears and Simon’s heart broke at the sight and her words. She had just confirmed for him, in those few cryptic words, who had been responsible and Simon could not believe, was not yet ready to face the fact that his parents had truly betrayed him.

Alicia took in all this in silence and then finally spoke up, “Who could do this,” she asked, looking back to the scans. “These cuts and incisions, this is high-quality work, Simon. We don’t know any surgeon with this kind of talent.” She wanted to understand this, she wanted a reason and a name and someone to be angry at. Right now, her unfocused rage wasn’t doing her any good.

“It was them,” River answered, speaking for Simon as his voice failed him. “Two by two, hands of blue.”

Snorting derisively, Alicia dismissed the girl’s assumption. “Hands of blue? That’s a bedtime story, meant to scare little children, they don’t exist.”

“Oh, they surely do,” Mal interjected quietly. He and his crew had watched the scene before them in silence. They were also waiting for the moment when everything would again make sense, just as Alicia was, and like the young doctor, they were just as baffled by the tangled web of deception that continued to wind around them.

“Simon,” Alicia said, ignoring the captain as best she could. Going to him, she placed a light hand under his chin and forced him to look at her. “Simon, tell them. This is crazy. Why would anyone do this to you? And who could do it?”

Simon wasn’t sure he had the strength or the inclination to explain any of this. Along with his memories of River, he had also regained his memories of her time at the Academy. Of the days and nights he had spent frantically searching for a way to get to her. And of the time and money he’d used trying to discover a way to stay one step ahead of the Alliance’s most deadly agents.

Sighing heavily, he found his voice and said tiredly, “Alicia, it’s a long story, but all I can tell you is that the Blue Hands do exist. They are a secret branch of the government and it’s because of them that River and I are fugitives.” Alicia’s eyes widened in shock at this admission. Barely able to comprehend his words, let alone their meaning, she was completely at a loss, when he took her by the shoulders and said, “You have to go.”

“Oh no,” she said, his order spurring something in her. Feeling her despair tear loose, she broke his hold and stared him down. “I’m not leaving here without you, Simon Tam.” The tone in her voice was firm, and River tensed, ready for a fight. She would destroy anyone who tried to keep her from her brother.

“This is crazy, Simon,” she told him, trying her best to reason with him, even though she was fairly certain he had lost the ability of logic. “All of this. You are not a fugitive. You are one of the best trauma surgeons in Capitol City with a brilliant future ahead of you. This, these people,” she said, gesturing to them all, looking back at them as they glared daggers in her direction. “This isn’t your life.”

Simon had remained silent through her tirade and now it was with a heavy heart and an even heavier conscience that he said, “No, Alicia. My life on Osiris isn’t mine. My parents created it for me, so they could have the perfect son. I deserve more than that.”

“But you can’t even remember them,” she wailed, her voice coming out strangled as she tried to suppress the sobs she could feel welling in her throat. “How can you know this is right?”

Simon finally brought his eyes up to meet hers and then let them wander. First to his sister, whose fierce determination and love he could feel radiating off of her like a beacon, then to the captain, Mal, Zoe, Jayne and finally around to Inara. They were still missing one, he knew that now, even if he couldn’t remember her specifically. Kaylee belonged here too, and Simon was glad that he could say the next statement to his friend with confidence. “Because it feels right.”

Her tears came now, one after the other and Simon tried to comfort her, but Alicia would have none of it. “Goodbye Simon,” she managed to choke out, before running from the room, Zoe following after her to close up the ship. Simon stood, frozen in place, unable to move, unable to process all that had just happened.

River moved to him, reaching out a hand to let him know she was here, but with a jerk, he backed away from her. “I just need time,” he muttered, barely raising his eyes from the floor as he shuffled out of the room.

She stood in stunned silence for a moment, her own tears threatening to fall. She had him back, didn’t she? Isn’t that what she had hoped for? But now, he was in more pain, she had caused her brother more pain. How could that be? It was the last thing she’d ever wanted.

“Better take us outta world, River,” Mal said quietly, interrupting her internal pity party. Turning to him, she nodded once and then brushed past both Mal and Jayne to head to the bridge. Jayne looked off after her for a minute and then followed.

Once they’d gone, Mal finally allowed himself to relax. Easing into a chair in the common area, he had almost completely forgotten about Inara, when she came up behind him and started to knead his shoulders, trying to release the tension he held there.

Leaning back his head and groaning with content, Mal closed his eyes and murmured, “What have we done?”

Inara didn’t answer him for a minute, thinking instead to all she had just witnessed and what it meant, for them and for Kaylee. Leaning down, she placed a light kiss against his lips and then sighing, went back to working on his shoulders. When Mal opened his eyes, he saw tears falling gently down her face, as she answered him. “I don’t know.”

***

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