BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - GENERAL

TAMSIBLING

A NEW LIFE, ch. 14: Danny Boy
Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Post-BDM: Kaylee finally finds out that Simon is alive, while the crew gets closer to giving the two a reunion. And Alicia makes a deal with Gabriel.


CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 3802    RATING: 9    SERIES: FIREFLY

A/N: Thanks to all who have commented and eagerly await each chapter - you have no idea how gratifying that is a for a fic writer like myself. Enjoy!

And thanks again to Leiasky: there are too many reasons to list.

I would threaten you for comments, but it's just getting a little old now, don't you think?

***

A NEW LIFE, ch. 14: Danny Boy

***

When Kaylee got a live wave just days after her first message from Serenity, she knew something was really wrong. While River’s initial message had been decidedly cryptic, and completely in keeping with the young girl’s personality, Kaylee had noticed something else – fear. It was not like River to be so fearful of … well, anything. And Kaylee had been living with a fairly consistent feeling of unease since she’d listened to the wave.

Settling into the seat in front of the screen, she had been sure to shut and lock the door to the den, uncertain of the news she’s be receiving, but almost positive, she’d want to talk with her old crewmates in private. Daniel was down for his afternoon nap and Marie, who had been staying out with her sister since his birth, agreed to watch him should he awaken.

So, with a deep breath and a lot of trepidation, Kaylee flipped on the screen and was immediately greeted by Inara’s beautiful and beaming face, the captain’s rough mug just visible over her friend’s shoulder.

“Mei mei,” Inara sighed in relief as a smile spread across her face at the sight of Kaylee. “Thank you for taking our call.”

Kaylee nodded once, her heart swelling at the sight of her friend, and also sinking at the realization of just how badly she had missed her, missed them all. It still hurt, even after nine months.

“How you doin’, lil’ Kaylee,” Mal asked, his eyes betraying his concern. He looked her up and down in an instant, looking for any sign of injury. Kaylee was glad the wave screen only showed from her shoulders up. While she had lost a majority of her baby weight in the past month, she was still carrying a few extra pounds and would not have put it past Inara or the captain to notice. “We were surprised you weren’t still at the Everetts,” he told her, fishing for an explanation.

One that Kaylee would give. “Well, ‘Rie asked if I wanted some time out in the country, so we came out to stay with her sister. She runs a foster home for kids with no family, it’s been fun,” she finished lamely, her tone conveying many things, although fun could not be among them.

“That’s wonderful, Kaylee,” Inara said. As an uncomfortable silence rose between the three of them, Kaylee decided she would break it. The suspense was near killing her. “Is everything okay,” she asked finally. “River sounded kinda off in her message the other day.”

Shooting quizzical gazes to each other, Mal asked, “River? River sent you a wave?”

Kaylee nodded once, wondering why he should be concerned. “Yeah, it was recorded since it came through the Everetts. She told me ya’ll were comin’ and she hoped I want to see ya.” Kaylee looked between her two friends, trying to read the emotions they were so plainly trying to hide. “Everythin’ all right?”

Placing a gentle hand on Mal’s arm, Inara stilled his rising anger at River’s interference, at least for the time being. “Of course it is, dear,” Inara said, looking back to her with that warm smile she always gave. “We have some news actually.”

When Kaylee did not push the issue, Inara continued, “We’re coming to see you because, well …” Inara faltered for the first time, suddenly realizing just how damaging the information she was about to impart could be. This wasn’t just some long lost friend Inara was talking about it was Simon, Kaylee’s Simon, and now as Inara looked to her friend, whose eyes still held such pain, she wondered how it would be received.

“It’s about Simon,” Mal finally finished for her, taking her hand in his and squeezing it gently.

Kaylee sighed heavily and leaned back in her seat. Casting tired eyes to them, she said, “I don’t want to hear it.”

Inara and Mal exchanged another look she could not decipher and then Inara continued. “Kaylee, sweetie, I really think –“

“Inara,” Kaylee interjected, her voice sounding harsher than she had intended. “Simon’s gone. Why’da we gotta keep going over this? I can’t keep relivin’ somethin’ that’s done past.”

“Kaylee now, listen,” Mal stated, but Kaylee was fired up and she would not be deterred.

“No, cap’n, you listen,” she told him, sitting forward and fixing him with a hard stare. “You think these past months been easy for me, I’ve been trying to forget Simon every day I been here, hopin’ that if I can stop seein’ his face or wantin’ his touch the pain will go away. Do you have any idea how numbin’ that pain is,” she asked them. Her eyes had started to fill with tears, and her friends now looked slightly blurry as she kept her gaze locked on the screen. “I can’t keep livin’ with that pain. He’s dead and gone and I’m tryin’ to accept that. I gotta,” she finished almost mentioning Daniel, but stopping herself just in time. This was not the way she wanted her friends, her family, to find out about her son.

Inara’s eyes had teared as well, and she raised one delicate hand to wipe her cheeks as Kaylee tried to collect herself. It was Mal who was finally able to say what they had intended from the beginning. “Kaylee, I ain’t downplayin’ any of the hell you been through,” Mal told her, his voice tight from his own emotion. It was killing him to see her still so wrecked. He only hoped they were doing the right thing. “But mei mei, Simon ain’t dead. He’s alive.”

Kaylee felt certain that the world had just stopped. She was fairly sure that the stars had collided causing an explosion so great she would die instantaneously in a ball of fire. Her body nearly shook with those two words out of Mal’s mouth and she felt her entire body go taunt at the idea. Simon – alive; how was that possible? She tried to form a thought and found that her voice had left her. All she could do was stare blankly at the screen, even as her mind screamed with pain and joy and sorrow.

“We found him about a month ago on Osiris,” Inara explained, gauging her friend’s reaction. She wished so badly she could have told her this in person. She didn’t want Kaylee to go through this alone. She should be there, holding her hand, comforting her as the young woman received more and more incredible news. “Well, actually River found him.”

“Where is he now,” Kaylee asked, her eyes having locked onto a distant point that neither Mal or Inara could see. They were glazed over as well, her expression having gone from one of complete shock to one devoid of any and all emotion.

“He’s with us, sweetie,” Inara told her, desperately wanting to pull her friend back from the desolate place she had gone. “We’re bringing him to Beaumonde.”

Kaylee’s mind reeled with so many questions she was certain it would shut down, eventually turned to goo as it churned and spun with no relief in sight. Why, how, where, when, who … all these questions and more whirled around and through her and Kaylee was finding it difficult to stay focused, to stay upright. Where to begin …

“I want to talk with him.” Her voice was solid, resolute and Mal and Inara both hated the fact that they were going to have to deny the request.

“You can’t, mei mei,” Mal whispered, wishing there was an easier way to get through this.

At his refusal, Kaylee turned her big green eyes on him, and he saw her tears there again. Pleading with him, she said, “Cap’n, please. It’s Simon.”

“I know, Kaylee, but …” It was Mal’s turn to falter. He had no idea how to even put this into words; he was still having trouble wrapping his brain around the concept. But she needed to know, if they were going to tell her the truth, then it would have to be the whole truth.

“Kaylee, he’s not the same,” Inara said, saving Mal from saying the words.

Kaylee’s face which had started to show a glimmer of hope now fell entirely and Mal watched as her tears started to run down her cheeks. “Whatda ya mean,” she asked hoarsely, her voice shaky.

“We don’t know why and we’re not sure how, but his memory’s been adjusted,” Inara said slowly, uncertain of how much Kaylee really needed to know. Sighing heavily and biting back her own tears, she said quietly, “He doesn’t remember us Kaylee. He doesn’t remember the life he had on Serenity.

Everything stopped for Kaylee at that moment. No sound, no sight, no taste, no touch, nothing. “He don’t remember me,” she whispered needlessly, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Now, there’s no reason to believe he won’t eventually,” Inara was saying. She could hear the determination in her friend’s voice to convince Kaylee not to lose hope. But Kaylee had lost hope the day they had heard of Simon’s death, and this news, while unexpected, had not restored that hope. Kaylee had seen too much and suffered too much to faithfully believe that easily again.

“How far out are you,” Kaylee asked, her voice again toneless.

Mal and Inara exchanged another look, and it was Mal who answered her. “About ten days.”

Kaylee nodded once and when she again brought her eyes to the screen, they were clear, her tears having dried. Once again, as had been the case for most of the past nine months, she felt nothing. “I guess I’ll see ya then.”

“Kaylee,” Inara pleaded, her eyes still crying her own tears as she watched her friend withdraw. “Kaylee, please. We want to help you. We love you, mei mei, very much.”

“I know that ‘Nara,” Kaylee told her, her voice still betraying no emotion. With a simple shrug, she said, “But that don’t mean you can.”

And with no other comment, Kaylee flipped off the screen. She had no idea how long she sat in that chair, how long she stared off into space. She thought briefly of running. Of getting Daniel and taking off so that when Serenity arrived she would be long gone. But she was tired, tired of running. If Simon really were back, she would have to see him, if only to know for certain that regardless of what they had meant to each other, they would still have no future.

She wasn’t exactly sure when Marie brought Daniel to her. The older woman did not ask any questions, just brought her swaddled son to her and placed him gently in her arms. She left Kaylee alone then, with her boy.

Kaylee knew that once she looked down into his angelic face she would lose it. Now, just a little over a month old, he looked so much like his father – so much like Simon. With a heavy heart, Kaylee finally gazed down into his face, running a light finger against his smooth cheek. And with a ferocity she had not experienced in month, Kaylee sobbed, long, hard tears well into the night.

***

As Kaylee closed the connection, Mal and Inara both sat in shock for a moment, unsure of exactly what had just happened. Inara was still crying, her tears falling freely at the sight of her friend’s reaction. She had expected more emotion from Kaylee, tears, yelling, sobbing, not the cool reserve she had shown. Inara wondered if the Kaylee they would be seeing in a few days would really still be the girl they had known. And she feared what would happen if she wasn’t.

Mal couldn’t fathom what Kaylee was feeling, all he knew was that he wanted to hit something or someone very hard. This wasn’t fair for any of them and least of all Kaylee. She was a bright girl who brought sunshine to any dark place imaginable and now, she was mired in the darkest of places and there was nothing he could do to bring her the light she so often shone on everyone else.

Turning to Mal, Inara wrapped her arms around his neck as she cried so more. “She’s in so much pain, Mal,” she whimpered against him, her tears wetting his shirt.

Holding her back tightly, Mal felt a few of his own tears slide down his face and into her hair. Trying to fight back the emotion, he could only whisper, “I know, bao bei. I know.”

***

A few hours later, Mal found River and Jayne enjoying a quiet meal in the mess. While was still unsettled by the amount of time the two seemed to be spending together, that was not the reason he wanted to see her now, and he had a feeling, she knew it.

She did not glance up at him as he entered the room. She did not pause in her eating or even give him the courtesy of a nod. Jayne looked up, his mouth full of food and gave him a “Hiya, Mal,” as he often did, before turning back to his supper. When just stood at the head of the table, his arms crossed over his chest, the mercenary started to get a little nervous.

“Whatda ya want,” Jayne finally asked, looking back to the captain. As he realized that the man’s gaze was not on him, but on River, Jayne cast a look between them and then leaning over to his girl, whispered, “I think you done pissed ‘im off.”

River cleaned her plate and then, setting down her fork, turned her impossibly large eyes to Mal. Her expression held no apology, not a hint of contriteness over what she’d done.

As it became apparent to him that he would have to start the yelling, Mal said harshly, “Why’d you do it?”

River thought about not answering him, but realized fairly quickly it would be inadvisable. “I wanted to see how she was,” she said quietly, her eyes never wavering under his fierce gaze.

“And,” Mal asked, not at all satisfied by her response.

“I had to leave a recording, she wasn’t there.” River continued to hold his look, even as she shuddered internally at the ferocity of his anger. He was hopping mad and that was something she had not expected.

Jayne for his part just kept staring between the two, having absolutely no clue what was going on, but enjoying the fact that Mal was mad at somebody else for a change.

“You had no right,” Mal told her, his tone still as cold as ice.

Rising, River stood in front of him. Her expression was full of fire and determination and it was not the first time Mal had seen it. “She’s my friend, my family and I had every right,” she bit out. And with that, she stalked away from him, heading back for the cockpit and the serenity of the black.

Mal stood firmly in place for several minutes after she’d gone. He was still furious with her, for reaching out to Kaylee without his permission, but she hadn’t told her about Simon and Mal felt that showed a fair level of judgment on her part. Not that River was known for her overabundance of tact. However, it was probably her message that had peaked Kaylee’s curiosity enough to listen to what Mal and Inara had to say, and for that he supposed he should be grateful.

With a sigh, Mal stalked off, back to Inara’s shuttle, hoping he could get some sleep. Jayne watched him go and then turned to look down the hall toward where River had retreated. Shaking his head slowly, still baffled by what he’d witnessed, he wondered if not everybody on board might benefit from a bit of memory augmentation themselves.

***

By the time Serenity reached Beaumonde and the Everetts place, everyone was ready to get off the ship. The strain of their trip had caused each of the crew to feel a level of anxiety that was decidedly unhealthy.

Marie and Walt were both there to greet them, the matriarch of the household having headed back from her sister’s at the news she’d be having company. She hugged Mal and Inara, Zoe and River and gave Jayne her customary nod. When they introduced her to Simon she immediately saw why Kaylee had fallen for the boy – he was as handsome as she had said. Marie could also see, from his intense blue eyes to his dark hair where Daniel got his looks. But the look in Simon's eyes worried her. He looked like a frightened, lost little boy, instantly on the spot and entirely too tense for his own good. Mal had told her briefly that something had happened to him, that he couldn't remember anyone but his sister, and she could see, by his stance and the hesitation in his eyes, that this upcoming meeting could truly destroy the still grieving Kaylee.

On the night of their arrival, most of the crew sat in doors, talking in quiet tones with Walt and Marie. They all tried to avoid any topics of import, everyone still on edge at the thought of Kaylee and Simon meeting.

Simon for his part was outside, unable to stand being in close proximity to them all. On the trip to Beaumonde, he’d been nagged, prodded, questioned and he'd had quite enough. Despite their increasingly annoying efforts, he still hadn’t remembered anything.

He’d been through every inch of his bunk, the bunk he apparently shared with Kaylee. He’d been in the infirmary a half dozen times, looking at the instruments, studying the scans he’d managed to get from Ariel. He had sat with River for hours, playing cards, talking, reading, anything to maintain contact with her, anything to encourage his warped mind to dig up another memory. But nothing had worked. He could still only remember his sister.

And now, here they were, just hours from Kaylee, the supposed love of his life. A love he couldn’t remember. He was ashamed at his inability to recall their time together and angered that he felt badly about it. It wasn’t his fault – he hadn’t willingly gone trotting off to be put under the knife of some crazy hundans who thought that his brain was a ruttin’ playground. But still, if they had been together, if they had been as close as his sister had told him, he felt he should be able to remember her. He felt he owed that to her; and it saddened him that it was something he could not do.

He wasn’t surprised when River found him, sitting on the edge of the Everetts’ porch. She took a seat beside him quietly, unwilling to disturb his musings, and content to simply sit with him in silence. After a moment, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and drew her close, placing a kiss against her temple. As lost and alone as he felt, she anchored him. Gave him a sense of purpose in this new life where he felt so incredibly out of place.

They sat like that for a few more moments before she spoke. “We’re going tomorrow.” When he wasn’t sure what she meant, she elaborated. “We’re going to see Kaylee, tomorrow.”

Simon inhaled sharply at the thought. He wasn’t ready, not yet. He wasn’t ready to confront this woman who, out of all of them, would expect so much from him. “River, I don’t know if …”

He trailed off as she lifted her face to meet his gaze. Her large brown eyes reflected the light of the full moon overhead and he could see her pain there, but also her hope. “We’re going to go, me and Jayne,” she told him. “Let me talk to her first, see if I can help her understand. Then, you can come with everybody else, in a day or so.”

Simon nodded once, grateful that, without his having to ask, his sister understood. She understood how incredibly difficult this would be for him and for Kaylee. And while Simon could not remember this girl, he didn’t want to cause her any more pain. She had already suffered enough and the thought that he could bring more heartache to her chilled his blood.

Of course there was always the chance that one look at her beautiful face would bring everything flooding back. And while Simon didn’t necessarily believe it, this thought was the only thing that allowed him to sleep at night.

***

Jayne and River piloted the shuttle towards Millie’s, having gotten coordinates from the Everetts. They rode together in silence, the trip only scheduled to take an hour at best.

Things between them had been going along nicely, at least to River’s way of thinking. As the past weeks had gone by, she had always been able to find Jayne when she needed him, certain that he was sure to never be too far away. When she and Simon had a particularly bad spell, he was always there, lending his support. And when she felt giddy at the excitement of just having her brother back, he’d been around to give her a smile and share her joy. And of course, when she’d wanted to neck with him, he hadn’t turned her down.

She wasn’t sure if it could be classified as a relationship and truth be told, she didn’t know if she wanted one. She liked him, a lot, and she knew that those feelings were quickly growing, but this was uncharted territory for her and despite her overly large brain, it was something she had no precedent for. And the thought of exploring love was scary to say the least.

When they were finally just minutes from setting down, Jayne apparently decided that the silence was going to kill him. Looking over to her, he watched as she took the ship off auto-pilot and gently glided it to the ground, bringing her down with barely a bump. Gorramit she was good.

Just as he was about to speak, she turned to him and smiled. “Ready,” she asked, her voice full of a false cheerfulness he could spot from a mile away.

Not waiting for his answer, she bounded out of the cockpit and toward the hatch. Jayne caught up with her just as her hand was about to release the door. Turning her to face him he saw the slightest tremor in her features, before she again affected her complacent look. “Come on, I want to see Kaylee,” she told him, trying to tug him towards the door.

“So do I, River,” Jayne told her, keeping a firm grip on her arm, but not holding her tight enough to hurt her. “But we gotta talk somethin’ out first.”

River knew by the look on his face what he was going to ask, and she knew that she couldn’t answer him, not now. Reaching up to place a hand against his cheek, she gave him a light kiss on the lips and whispered, “Please, Jayne, we just have to get through this. Please don’t demand anything of me right now. I can’t take it.”

The pain in her voice, coupled with her big eyes, imploring him to respect her wishes, stayed his lips. Reaching down to cradle her face in his hands, he whispered, “All right, baby girl, we’ll play it your way for now. But once this is over, we are gonna talk, dong ma?”

Smiling at him, it was the first genuine expression of happiness she had exhibited in quite some time. Giving him another light kiss, she told him, “I promise.”

Then, grabbing his hand she pulled him from the shuttle, determined to reunite their family if it was the last thing she ever did.

***

Alicia did not like the fact that Gabriel had ordered her here with barely a please. And she liked even less that as he glared at her, there were two blue-handed agents flanking her chair. She realized pretty quickly once Gabriel had sent the wave telling her to come to the Tam Estate, that she was being watched. The knock on her door as he’d ended the transmission, her escort, made that painfully obvious. She really hated him now.

“You’re sure this is the ship you left him on,” Gabriel asked Alicia, the young woman’s pained expression having no effect on his icy demeanor.

Nodding, she turned her hurt, angry eyes to him and said, “Yes.”

Looking to her for a moment more he closed down the image of the firefly and extended his hand to Alicia. “Thank you, my dear.”

“You know where he is then?” Her voice was still hard, but she knew her tone was also mixed with a bit of desperation and hope. Simon had been gone for a little over a month and she missed him. She wanted him back.

“Yes,” Gabriel answered, unconcerned with how the young doctor felt about his son. Gabriel had always regarded a woman like Alicia a distraction from Simon’s true work – the medical-elect, but Keller, the fool, had insisted they take the woman under their care, wipe her memory as well to rid any traces of River and introduce her into Simon’s life as a love interest. And much to Gabriel’s chagrin, before he’d been kidnapped, it had been working.

“I want to go with you,” she said firmly, her eyes never wavering, although the man refused to meet her gaze.

But now, he finally turned. “Excuse me?”

“I want to go with you. I want to help you bring Simon home.” Her voice remained steady and Alicia was slightly surprised. She could feel her fear and her sadness welling in her chest and she had thought for sure those suppressed emotions would cause her to shake. She didn’t trust Gabriel either, not in the slightest, but if Simon were to have any chance of making it through this, of seeing that he had a reason to come back to this life, then it would be up to her to convince him.

Gabriel regarded her coolly for a moment, wondering if this was really the best idea. While she had not panned out as he’d initially hoped, she did seem to genuinely care for Simon and while Gabriel felt that was a useless emotion, he knew that love was what had landed Simon in this mess in the first place – love for his crazy sister.

Maybe it was just the kind of pull his son would need to realize just what he was giving up. It wasn’t as if Alicia weren’t beautiful, charming and smart, all the traits Simon should desire in a companion.

Nodding once, he turned back to close up his documents and said, “Very well. The agents will take you home to pack. We leave first thing in the morning. I’ll have Regan send you the details.”

Not even thinking to say thank you, Alicia resolutely followed the two menacing men from the room, her thoughts consumed with Simon’s handsome face and the fact that soon this would all be over.

***

As River stepped out into a spectacular summer day, she was immediately confronted with the sounds of squealing children and barely contained laughter. Looking towards the large house that sat a few yards away, she saw as children of varying ages charged through the yard, chasing each other and playing games with reckless abandon. The sight of such joy brought a smile to River’s lips and a lightness to her heart.

And in the midst of it all she saw Kaylee. The girl had not changed much since River had last seen her, at least not physically. Now the closer they got, the more River could read her friend’s emotions. And it was the intensity of those emotions that rooted her feet to the ground. She stood motionless, unable to readily process the overwhelming love and care she felt radiating from her friend. It was the most intense sense River had ever felt and it filled her with inexplicable joy, a fierce loyalty and uncontainable glee all at once. Absorbing these emotions and hundreds more, River set off for Kaylee at a run, barely able to contain her excitement at what and who she’d find with the young woman.

Kaylee saw River approaching, the girl’s graceful form unmistakable even at a distance. Placing Daniel back into the bassinet she had pulled onto the porch, Kaylee rose and walked down the few steps to greet her friend. Once River was close enough, Kaylee could see the tears in her eyes and she felt her own eyes well up at the sight of such a familiar and loving face.

River launched herself into Kaylee’s arms, holding her friend so tightly it was difficult for Kaylee to breathe. Feeling the warmth in her embrace, Kaylee hugged her back, so grateful to receive such a reception, especially after the way they had left things.

“Doesn’t matter,” River whispered, blinking back her tears. “Still love you. Still my sister.”

Kaylee felt her own tears fall at the words and she squeezed River for another moment, before pulling back from the girl’s embrace. “I missed you River,” she told her, trying to control her emotions.

River wiped at her cheek to clear her tears and then excitedly clasped the girl’s hands. “I want to see him.”

Giving her a puzzled look, Kaylee had a feeling she knew exactly who River was referring to, but was willing to play dumb for just a minute more. Daniel was hers, her only reminder of Simon and she selfishly wanted to keep him a secret for as long as she could.

Turning a knowing look on her, River gestured over her shoulder, where Kaylee had left her son’s slumbering form. “Not fair to keep him to yourself.”

The two women held the gaze for another moment and then letting out a slight sigh, Kaylee pulled River along and up onto the porch. Bouncing with excitement, River waited in anticipation as Kaylee leaned over the small crib and pulled the baby up and into her arms. She shushed him quietly for a moment as he fussed at being disturbed and then turned to present him to his aunt.

“River,” Kaylee said quietly, raising her green eyes to lock with the girl’s brown ones. “There’s somebody I’d like you to meet.” Just as she started the introduction, Jayne joined them, the shock on his face at the sight of Kaylee with a baby quickly passing as he saw the exhilarated look playing across River’s features. “This is your nephew,” Kaylee told her friend, adjusting her hold so they could see into the blanket. “Daniel Simon Tam.”

River’s eyes again overflowed with tears as she took in the sight of the perfect little boy before her. His dark hair and blue eyes made him unmistakably Simon’s. Tentatively, she reached out a hand, working her pinky finger into his balled fist and smiling even more brightly as he curled his little hand around the tip of her finger. “Hello there, little one,” she whispered, gazing into his face and basking in the peacefulness of his presence.

Kaylee watched as River bonded with her nephew, feeling such guilt at having kept the boy from his family for so long. But she hadn’t had a choice, had she? She had needed to get away from Serenity and those memories, and because she’d had the courage to leave, her son was safe and healthy. That was all she could have ever wanted.

Jayne saw River struggle to keep her emotions in, and he knew that her heart swelled at the sight of the little guy. He was pretty cute, although Jayne would never admit it. Placing a light hand on River’s shoulder, she turned her wet eyes up to him for a second, the widest grin he had ever seen on her face, before turning back to gaze at the baby.

“Do you want to hold him,” Kaylee asked.

River’s eyes got wider, if that were possible, and she nodded once, again bobbing up and down expectantly as Kaylee shifted her arms to place Daniel’s still sleeping form in his aunt’s embrace. “There you go,” Kaylee whispered as she settled him down.

River’s heart swelled with pride and love for this little baby she had just met. How someone could become so attached to a person when they were this little she had no idea, but she had. She knew that she would die to protect him, just as Kaylee would and the sudden appearance of her maternal instincts threw her for a loop.

Swaying with him back and forth slightly, River started to walk a short path down the porch. Kaylee and Jayne let her go, both of them smiling at the girl’s obvious enjoyment. When Jayne finally turned back to regard Kaylee he saw much of the same pain and fear in her eyes that he’d been watching in River’s over the past months and it made his heart hurt. A girl like Kaylee didn’t deserve this much pain, never in a million years.

“Hey there, lil’ Kaylee,” he said gruffly, reaching out to pull her into a tight embrace.

She returned the hug, grateful that Jayne wasn’t mad with her either. Two out of five wasn’t bad; she could at least comfort herself with that fact.

“He’s a pretty cute runt,” he told her, turning to again regard River as she whispered to the boy, no doubt telling him things he would never need to know.

Smiling through her tears, she said, “Thank you.” They stood in silence for a moment both gazing off after River, their thoughts in two totally different directions. Jayne was thinking of how natural River looked holding that kid and wondered why he would even be entertaining such a thought.

Kaylee’s, on the other hand, were consumed with Simon, his reaction to her and his subsequent reaction to his son. Somehow she doubted he would greet the news that he was a father with as much enthusiasm as River had at being an aunt. Finally, she asked, “You’ve seen him?”

Jayne gazed down to her, noticing that her eyes were still locked forward where River was traveling back towards them with her little boy. “Yep.”

“And he really don’t remember nothing,” she asked, her voice breaking at just the thought.

Gorramit, why did Jayne have to tell her this? “Nope, he don’t. ‘Members River, but not any the rest of us.”

Kaylee took a deep breath and let it out slowly. So it was as Mal and Inara had told her. He didn’t remember them and he hadn’t remembered her. Feeling her life spiraling out of control again, she sank into the nearest chair and waited for River to bring her son back. Despite what happened in the next few days, at least she knew she would always have him.

***

Okay, I will beg - comments, please!

COMMENTS

Tuesday, June 27, 2006 3:04 PM

SUZFROMOZ


oh wow, I get to be first! Shiny as always....you really have a gift. Cant wait for each installment. keep up the most excellent work.

Tuesday, June 27, 2006 5:13 PM

JEDINERD7


It's like a drug and I'm addicted! I need more! The angst and tension and the waiting... it's killing me! I can feel that the next chapter is going to be great one!

Tuesday, June 27, 2006 8:45 PM

BLUEEYEDBRIGADIER


I am really glad you had Jayne and River do a vanguard move with Kaylee, since if ya think about it, they are the two people who were close with Kaylee but were not in "special" positions like Inara and Mal were. Gives the three of them a chance to start making the proper communications between Kaylee and the crew;)

But I am definitely dreading both the moemnt Simon and Kaylee meet, and the eventual HoB/Gabriel Tam vs. BDHs confrontation....cuz people are gonna get hurt:(

BEB

Wednesday, June 28, 2006 12:02 AM

JYNNANTONNYX


Alicia needs a bitchslap! grrr. I hope she understands in the end, that she can't be his.

I love that River and Jayne went before the rest - a good tactical move :) And a chance for River to get clucky and Jayne to contemplate on that.

Waiting for the next chapter! :)

Wednesday, June 28, 2006 12:09 AM

AMDOBELL


I'm not sure that dragging it out is good for any of them but maybe it will enable Kaylee to get used to the idea that the Simon she will see is not the same as the one she thought was lost, and if that space gives Simon time to adjust and calm down then all to the good but all this time spent doing things so very slowly just gives the Hands of Blue more time to catch them and that makes me all manner of worried. Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me

Wednesday, June 28, 2006 2:00 AM

RIVERISMYGODDESS


You know with your writing ability that you will never have to beg for comments. :)

*having absolutely no clue what was going on, but enjoying the fact that Mal was mad at somebody else for a change.*

He does seem to focus most of his anger on Jayne, especially now that Simon is not himself.

Now I am anxiously awaiting the next installment, this story is so wonderful, thank you for sharing it with us.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006 2:46 AM

BLACKBEANIE


Aww...aww...and once more...aww

Wednesday, June 28, 2006 4:34 AM

ALLIETHORN7


DAMN!!! That was me up there, the last anon. Curse slow internet connections!!!

-Danny

Wednesday, June 28, 2006 6:00 AM

LEIASKY


Ahh, the call Mal and Inara made to Kaylee was equal parts exciting and heartbreaking. Poor Kaylee. That has become a theme for this story. You should have named it 'Poor Kaylee: chapter 1-'. laugh

I'm glad Mal made the connection that River's message to Kaylee a few days prior was probably the reason she'd actually accepted his wave to begin with.

I just love the conversation that River has with Simon. She knows how difficult this is for him and wants to help in whatever way she can. It was so sad!

Ahh, Alicia is blinded by love. Hopefully she'll come to her senses before someone really gets hurt!

I love the reunion between River/ Jayne and Kaylee. It played out so well. And as soon as River saw Kaylee, she knew about Daniel. It was perfect! Even down to Jayne grumping that he had to be the one to confirm for Kaylee that Simon didn't remember anything!

But, will all the other reunions go as well as this one did....don't torture your readers and keep them waiting for too long....:)


Wednesday, June 28, 2006 11:05 AM

LEIGHKOHL


<don't torture your readers and keep them waiting for too long....:)> Ummm I think that's what this whole series is all about!!!! WHat a fantastic chapter!!!! The reunion between Kayle/Jayne/River was absolutely precious and upsetting! Kaylee's demeanor has certainly changed and what will that do tot the crew and of ut most importance, Simon? Alicia is just a pawn in this whole thing, I can't be too hard on her, she is a woman in love and is determined to get her man back, even though we all cringe at her choice! Oh I can't wait for the reunion to come, you better post it today!! Great Job!


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Make a Wish (5/5)
Kaylee and Simon decide to keep the pregnancy a secret from the rest of the crew. An unexpected turn of events leaves them lost. Simon/Kaylee, River, Mal, Inara. PG-13

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River's wish causes repercussions throughout the crew. Kaylee wants more details about Simon's first time, while Mal has a friendly tip for Jayne. R for suggestive language. Simon/Kaylee and crew.

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Post-Miranda. River is turning 18 and she makes a wish that unsettles her brother. Simon/Kaylee, with the rest of the crew. PG-13 to R for suggestive language.

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Simon and his parents reach an understanding while Mal and Inara find themselves on the same page ... finally. Simon/Kaylee, Mal/Inara.

Homesick: Chapter 10
Mal's a bit surprised by the welcome her receives. Gabriel and Regan see the light, but Chen is anxious to keep them all in the dark. Simon/Kaylee, hints of Mal/Inara.

Homesick: Chapter 9
River decides to tell her parents the truth - all of it - and they're not happy. Kaylee is still reeling from her visit with Simon. And another Big Damn Hero joins the mix. Kaylee/Simon, hints of Mal/Inara.

Homesick: Chapter 8
River goes for help and finds Kaylee. Chen grows worried that the Tams will not press charges against their son and takes matters into his own hands. Kaylee manages to see Simon and it doesn't go so well. Kaylee/Simon, hints of Mal/Inara.

Homesick: Chapter 7
Kaylee and Inara get closer to Simon and River, while River makes a call to Mal. Simon despairs in prison and Kaylee pines after him. Simon/Kaylee, hints of Mal/Inara.