A/N: Thanks to all you commented - as the "reunion" is going to probably be a bit drawn out for all of you, I'm going to do my best to keep posting on a daily basis.

Comments, Comments, Comments - Nothing is more important!

And thanks again to Leiasky who helped to fix my Simon/River in this chapter and so much else!

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A NEW LIFE, ch. 15: Hello Again

***

River sat, holding her nephew, as Kaylee looked on. The two women had retreated inside to the coolness of the house, leaving Jayne to entertain himself with the kiddies outdoors. They had all been a little scared of him at first. He was, after all, fairly gruff looking and a little on the big side. But as soon as he’d hoisted three of them onto his shoulders and carried them around the yard, he’d become the children’s new best friend.

Kaylee watched as River doted on her son. She could see the love in the girl’s face, the devotion that she felt to that little life, reflected back at her. River caught a bit of her thoughts and gazed up at her, tears in the bottom of her eyes. “He’s so beautiful,” she breathed. “You did good.”

Kaylee sniffled a bit at the girl’s admission, feeling that if River could accept her decision to keep the baby a secret, maybe the rest of the crew could as well. Looking out the window to her side, Kaylee let her mind wander for a moment; the rest of the crew … and Simon. “When’s he comin’,” she asked, not shifting her gaze from where it studied the hazy landscape.

River was trying hard to keep her feelings in check. Her love for the little boy in her arms and her concern for her friend where tempered by her brother’s pain and confusion, still affecting her even at a distance. It had become harder and harder for River to keep her emotions separate as the intensity of all those involved had risen in the past few days. The only solace she found in it all was Daniel. His mind, not yet cluttered by the concerns of adulthood was blissfully simple and River could appreciate the calm that afforded.

“He’ll be here in about a day, with the rest of the crew,” River told her, her eyes studying Kaylee’s profile. “Everyone is so excited to see you.”

Kaylee turned back to face her then, giving her friend a sad smile. “I’ve missed you all, too,” she told her, reaching out to squeeze her hand. Daniel squirmed a bit at the motion, and with barely a conscious effort, River shifted him just slightly, shushing him immediately. In seconds he was back asleep.

Staring at her with wide and knowing eyes, Kaylee sat back and commented, “You’re a natural.”

Wrinkling her nose at her, River did not want to think about being a mother. The idea was at once thrilling and terrifying. Besides, considering all she’d been through, there was a very good chance she couldn’t even have a baby. “Don’t worry,” she told her. “I’m giving him back.”

Kaylee smiled warmly and River felt a bit of relief. She was glad to see that, although her friend was still in a lot of pain, she was managing to get better. But now, with the news of Simon’s survival, River could read her fear, mixed in with all that suffering. “It’s going to be hard,” she said quietly, waiting until Kaylee’s eyes had again focused on her before continuing. “He’s tried, really he has, but he just can’t remember.”

Sucking in a sharp breath, Kaylee tried to will her tears away. Going to sit by her friend, her sister for all intents and purposes, she asked, “What’d they do to him?”

River thought of how much to tell her. She really didn’t need to know all the gory details, it was quite enough just to get the gist. “They tried to take away his memory. They erased his life on Serenity, his life on the run. They erased me,” she finished softly, again gazing down to her nephew’s tiny face. So perfect and so small, River wondered if she had ever been so tiny – it was hard to imagine.

“Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry,” Kaylee murmured, reaching out to wrap an arm around the girl’s shoulder. River leaned into her, taking a little solace in her friend’s embrace. “But he remembers you now, right?”

River nodded once and looked back into Kaylee’s big eyes. “Yes. He remembered me first. I think it’s because we found him on Osiris. He was surrounded by our childhood. I think it was just easier for memories of me to come back.” She was trying to justify how she had gotten so lucky, why she should be the one he remembered and not the mechanic.

Kaylee knew exactly what she was trying to do and while she was grateful for it, it wasn’t necessary. “It’s okay, River,” she told her, pressing a kiss into the girl’s hair. “He’s your brother, your family. He should remember you.”

“But you’re family, too,” she insisted, and this time Daniel awoke fully at the commotion. Starting to cry, Kaylee reached for him and River gladly turned the little one over to his mother. As she rocked him, River continued, “You’re our family, and now, you have Daniel. He has to remember you.”

“But he may not, sweetie,” Kaylee told her, trying to remind herself as much as the young girl. Kaylee was trying valiantly not to get her hopes up, it had been next to impossible to deny the faint hint of optimism she’d felt since Mal and Inara’s wave, but she couldn’t afford to start wishing for things that couldn’t come true. It would only serve to paralyze her, and she couldn’t do that, not when she had Daniel to care for.

“But he will,” River said intensely, grasping Kaylee’s hand as it rested against Daniel’s back, and squeezing hard. “He will. I know it.”

Kaylee smiled at her once, one of her ‘I know that’s what you want to think’ smiles and River wished that she could be more convincing. But her affirmation that Simon would remember the young woman was based on just as much hope as Kaylee’s wish that it was true.

Daniel continued to fuss and Kaylee excused herself to go feed him. River sat there in silence for a moment, thinking of how close they all were to getting everything they had ever wanted and at the same time, close to losing it all too.

Tiredly, she wandered outside and stood against the porch’s railing, watching as Jayne played a game of Alliance and Browncoats with the children. They hung all over him, trying to pull down his massive frame even as he charged up some imaginary hill. His obvious joy at being a kid again, coupled with the children’s glee at having a new playmate helped to lessen River’s unease.

She had been watching him, growing more surprised by the minute at how good he was with kids, when he finally caught sight of her. Throwing her one of his trademark grins that only served to weaken her knees, she heard as he yelled, “All right, new game. Hide and seek!” The children let up a shout as Jayne bellowed, “I’m it and I’m countin’ to a hundred.”

With squeals of delight and hurled challenges in the mercenary’s direction, the dozen or so children took off at a run, heading in a myriad of directions. As Jayne began to count, loudly, “One, two, three …” he approached her on the porch, coming around to her side and pulling her into a tight embrace.

She leaned against him. She was so tired, so tired of having to manage everyone else’s emotions, of trying to keep them straight. Her head hurt, a lot and her body ached for relief that would not, could not come until they were all together again.

“Kaylee all right,” Jayne asked quietly, murmuring as he rested his cheek against the top of her head.

She nodded once, and then gazed up at him. “Thank you.”

“Fer what, darlin’,” he asked, given her a puzzled expression. As she was about to answer, he raised up a hand to silence her, and threw his voice back toward the yard, where a few of the children could still be seen scrambling for a hiding place. “Thirty, thirty-one, thirty-two …” With tenacity, they renewed their search and with a grin Jayne brought his attention back to her. “Now, what were you sayin’?”

Smiling widely at him, River was amazed at the amount of fun he was having. Dismissing her earlier comment, she wrapped her arms around his neck, standing on her tip toes as she said, “I had no idea you were so good with children.”

Shrugging and trying to hide his embarrassment, there was no hiding the smile on his face. “Yeah, well, my ma had a passel of lil’ uns and I guess, sometimes I miss ‘em is all.” His blue eyes drifted to a far away place for a moment, before he again turned and yelled, “Sixty-five, sixty-six, sixty-seven.”

Giggling at him, River fixed him with a firm kiss as he turned his attention back to her. She felt him pull her tighter and she leaned into him, enjoying the moment of peace and passion that came from kissing him, from being close to him. Jayne worked his mouth over hers, delighting in the softness of her skin, of her touch. Never before had he known a woman with such a gentle presence, while also having the capability to fight with a fierceness that rivaled his own. And he’d had no idea it would be such a turn-on.

As their kissing lengthened, River heard another childlike giggle from around the corner and pulled away from him, just to see a pair of inquisitive eyes sneak back around the corner. Jayne was not deterred and continued to kiss along her cheek and her neck until he reached her ear and gently pulled the lobe into his mouth.

Even as she melted at the sensation, she murmured to him, “I think you should have gotten to a hundred by now.”

“Aww, I can just say I’m countin’ to two,” he whispered against her cheek, his breath sending a shiver down her spine.

Fixing him with a playful gaze, she used the remaining will power she had and pulled away. “Even they know you can’t count that high,” she told him, getting a grunt in reply.

And then with a quickness she hadn’t anticipated, Jayne grabbed her and pulled her to him, tickling her mercilessly at her sides. As she fell against him hardly able to breathe through her laughter, he hefted her over his shoulder and strode down the steps with her into the yard. “I found one,” he bellowed, bringing all the kids out from hiding. “And she’s it!”

***

That night, River was unable to sleep. Kaylee’s nerves at seeing Simon the next day, coupled with her brother’s nerves at being on display, caused her stomach to churn uncomfortably, and so after a few hours of uselessly tossing and turning, River admitted defeat and padded out of the bedroom she’d been given.

Walking through the dark house, she was about to head outside for some fresh air, when she felt the presence of someone else in the room. Turning and squinting in the moonlight, River saw the smallest form sitting across the room from her, staring out the window.

River and Jayne had been introduced to all the children that afternoon and each one had a personality and sense all their own. But one little girl had tugged at River’s heart more than the others, because she was just like River. And it was this little one, little Cadie, who sat, still as a mouse now, staring into the big sky.

Quietly, River walked over towards her and sat on the end of the same window seat, regarding the girl for a few more moments. Cadie was the youngest child in the house. At only three, she had been with Millie for a little over a year, after she’d been found abandoned in a run down shack at the edge of some woods about fifty miles from the current homestead.

Cadie had been found, shivering and cold in the smallest closet imaginable. The room had been locked securely from the outside and when the townsfolk had finally found her, she’d been out of what little provisions her parents had left behind for at least a week. Severely malnourished and traumatized, Millie had brought the girl in and through love and kindness she had slowly started to recover. She still would not speak and rarely played with the other children, content instead to wander off on her own.

And River knew why – the girl was a reader. Not as strong or powerful as River and chances were she never would be, but she felt things, more deeply than the others and that meant she had a hard time blocking things out as well. River suspected it was her ability that had caused her parents to abandon and mistreat her. A two-year-old is a scary enough proposition, factor in the ability to read minds and it was a parents worst nightmare.

With her long, flowing black hair and startlingly blue eyes, River had felt an instant connection to the child. Now, she felt the little one’s sadness and pain as she sat and stared. After what seemed an eternity, Cadie turned those bright blue eyes to River and gazed at her for several moments. River stayed still, knowing that the girl was trying to read her, trying to determine if she could be trusted.

After another interminably long moment, Cadie crawled over towards River and curled herself into her lap. River reached down to cradle the girl against her and moved over to one of the room’s couches, lying down with the little girl beside her. River could not sleep, but she felt Cadie’s mind settle, felt her relax for the first time in a long time, as River made no demands on her. Cadie was used to the other children, wanting her to talk, used to Millie’s sadness at her inability to be normal. River knew about all those feelings as she had experienced them time and again. And now that Cadie could sense a kindred spirit, she felt peaceful for the first time she could remember and that meant she could finally get some sleep.

***

Kaylee heard the ship arrive. Even as they parked it far out from the house, the hum of Serenity as she flew overhead was the most comforting sound Kaylee could imagine. She left Daniel, sleeping in his crib, and headed out to the porch to wait with Jayne and River for the crew’s arrival.

As the dust cloud that signified the approach of the mule drew bigger, Kaylee turned to River and Jayne and said, “Please, don’t tell them about the baby. Any of them.”

River, having known the girl would ask, only nodded. She did not feel it was the right decision, but it also wasn’t her choice. Jayne on the other hand had a whole list of reservations he was not afraid to share. “Aww, come on, now, Kaylee, that ain’t right,” he told her, fixing her with a hard stare.

Giving back as good as she got, she thrust a finger in his direction and said, “You look here, Jayne Cobb, you give birth to a baby, have to raise him by yourself because you think his daddy’s dead and then find out that his daddy is really alive, but can’t remember you and then we can talk about what is and what is not right.” Her voice held such conviction and certainty that any of Jayne’s other concerns died on his lips.

With a satisfied nod, Kaylee turned back to watch as the mule approached. River, still smiling slightly at her friend’s ability to put Jayne in his place, simply slid her hand into his and looked up at him with wide innocent eyes. When he met her gaze, she shrugged simply and muttered, “Mother lion protecting her cub.”

Jayne huffed for a second more and then managed to compose himself as the mule arrived and its five passengers disembarked.

Kaylee’s heart leapt at the sight of both Marie and Walt. She was glad the couple had come with the crew. She saw as Zoe shut down the vehicle and watched as Mal helped Inara down, and with a cold punch to the gut, Kaylee realized Simon was not with them.

River and Jayne moved to greet their friends, Inara embracing the young girl, as Mal and his merc shook hands. Zoe gave them both a nod and the Everetts greeted them kindly as well. Kaylee could only stand, frozen to the floor unable to believe that Simon had come all this way and had been unable or unwilling to take those last few steps.

Mal and Inara approached her slowly. Mal could not contain his excitement at seeing his mei mei again, but he could also read her hesitancy and it caused him to pause. Inara on the other hand would not be dissuaded. She had waited too long to see her friend and she would hug the young woman if it was the last thing she did.

“Oh mei mei,” she breathed, stepping forward and pulling Kaylee into a tight embrace. “It’s so good to see you, sweetie,” she whispered, stroking a gentle hand down Kaylee’s hair.

At first stiff in the other woman’s hold, Kaylee knew it was a stalwart battle she would not win. “We missed you, lil’ Kaylee,” Mal added, stepping forward to join their embrace.

With the feel of both her friends’ arms around her, Kaylee could not keep her resolute stature in place any longer. With a sigh that was half relief, half sadness, she sank into them both, the tightness of their grip keeping her standing as her knees threatened to fail her. Pulling them tighter to her, Kaylee feared she would never let go again. “I missed you too,” she murmured, knowing she was crying and knowing there was nothing she could do about it.

The others watched the reunion from the yard, knowing that all three of them needed time to digest their renewed connection. Turning a hard gaze to Zoe, River questioned, “Where is he?”

Zoe looked to the girl and saw a bright fire burning in her eyes. Suddenly very glad she had never done anything to piss the girl off, she answered, “He didn’t want to come. He stayed on the boat.”

Giving Jayne a look, River hopped in the mule without another word and took off towards the ship, convinced to talk some sense into her brother, the boob.

Jayne, Zoe and the Everetts watched her go, not at all surprised by her reaction. Sighing heavily, Jayne looked to Zoe and said, “I think I’m definitely glad ya’ll are here.”

Zoe smirked at the man and then moved to join their three crewmates on the porch. Just as Zoe and Kaylee were done saying their hellos, a little blonde-haired girl with bright brown eyes came bounding into their midst. Immediately greeted with four new faces she did not know, she stopped in her tracks, her eyes instantly drawn to Kaylee.

Approaching the woman, Ellie tugged on her hand and Kaylee knelt down to be at her height. Reaching out, she cupped her hand against her mouth and whispered loud enough for them all to hear, “Miss Kaylee, who is these people?”

Smiling at her, Kaylee scooped the girl into her arms. Now that she was at their level she was much bolder and she looked at each of them in turn, trying to decide if they were worth her trust. “”Member when I told you I had two families, Ellie,” Kaylee asked the girl, getting a dutiful nod in reply. “Well, this is one of ‘em.”

Her eyes widening, Ellie clasped her arms around Kaylee’s neck and hugged the woman tightly. “Oh, Miss Kaylee, I’m so glad you’re family came for ya,” she squealed, holding in tears of delight. “You and Daniel deserve a good family.”

Kaylee’s breath hitched in her throat at the mention of her son’s name. Glancing sharply to Marie, she saw the older woman give her a look of encouragement. Kaylee held her gaze for a moment and then reluctantly nodded. Without another word, Marie left their little grouping and headed inside to retrieve Daniel.

No one else had said a thing. At the mention of Kaylee’s baby, Jayne had quickly averted his eyes to the deck, certain to give something away if any of them questioned him directly. Mal and Inara had not missed the way Kaylee’s entire body had tensed and they all were curious as to who this Daniel could be.

Kissing Ellie lightly on the cheek, Kaylee set her back on the ground and with a light pat on the behind told her, “Go on now, and play. I’ll see ya at supper.”

Ellie smiled at her, completely oblivious to the bomb she had just dropped and started to skip away. As she passed Zoe, she stopped, and looked up, having to lean back to see all the way up to the woman’s face. “Wow,” she breathed, her eyes widening even farther. “You’re tall.” And with that, she continued her skipping. Zoe watched her go, feeling her heart flip over in her chest. She was adorable and as precocious as any child she and Wash could ever have hoped to have.

“Why don’t you all come in,” Kaylee asked, trying to keep a lightness in her voice she didn’t quite feel. She ushered them into the front sitting room, watching as each of her friends tried not to push. When they were all sitting, Mal and Inara next to each other, Zoe on the arm of a chair across the room, and Jayne leaning against the wall by the door, Kaylee also took a seat, as Walt excused himself to go speak with his sister-in-law, leaving the crew alone to reunite.

Unable to begin, Kaylee waited for Inara to ask, she knew she would. “How are you, Kaylee,” her friend inquired, trying to gauge the girl’s reaction. She was tense and Inara did not like the extra lines of worry that creased her face.

“I’m good, ‘Nara,” Kaylee told her, fixing her friend with a smile that was more fake than real. “Shiny even.”

“Mei mei, you know you don’t gotta tell us that,” Mal said, edging forward. He was close enough to touch her and he did, laying a light hand on her knee. “We know this has gotta be hell for you.”

Kaylee bit back her tears at his words. She knew he wanted to help, needed to in that noble Captain-y way of his, but she wasn’t so sure he could. “It ain’t easy, cap’n,” she agreed, giving him a watery smile. “I can tell you that for sure.”

Mal’s tension seemed to ease at her admission and he sat back a bit, Inara threading her hand through his. Kaylee was warmed by their closeness, so glad to see that her friends had managed to move past their differences and find the happiness they both deserved. Everyone should be so lucky.

“Who’s Daniel,” Zoe asked finally, voicing the question they had all been trying to avoid. Kaylee met her gaze and didn’t see anger there or any sign of resentment, just concern. God, it was good to have her family back.

Just then Marie entered the room across from Kaylee, her son in her arms. Kaylee rose to take the boy who was just beginning to awaken. All of them, save Jayne, Walt and Marie, looked on in shock, as Kaylee cradled the boy to her and treated him with ease that only a mother could. “Well, Zoe,” Kaylee said, her voice taking on the lilting tone of baby talk as she made faces at her son. “I’m glad you asked.”

Resuming her seat, she gave Daniel’s cheek a light kiss, and then turned him so they could all get a better look. “This is Daniel,” she said, introducing him to the room. Inara immediately started to tear, and even Zoe had to blink rapidly to clear her eyes. Mal’s expression barely changed, but it softened just a bit.

“This is Daniel,” Kaylee stated as way of a formal introduction. “My son.” ***

River had barely shut the mule down, before she hopped off and strode in a huff into the cargo bay. Standing in the middle of the room, she placed her hands on her hips and yelled as loud as she could manage, “Simon Tam! Get your butt in here right now!”

It took him a minute, a minute more than River would have liked, but he came in, heading towards her from the common room. At his entrance, she crossed her arms over her chest and waited impatiently for him to approach her. Once he was a few feet from her, her eyes blazing, she demanded, “What are you doing here?”

Glancing to her, he noticed the fire in her eyes. Matching her pose, he shrugged simply and retorted, “You’re the one who dragged me on this ship.”

“That is not what I meant and you know it,” she bit out, her voice shaking from her anger. Moving to stand just inches from him, she stuck out a finger and poked him hard in the chest. “Kaylee is waiting to see you.”

Simon rubbed where River’s finger had hit him, certain she’d leave a bruise. Distancing himself from his sister, he told her, “I can’t remember her, so what’s the point?”

When River did not answer him, he turned expecting to see her gone or maybe a bit calmer. Instead he was fairly certain her eyes burned more brightly with her rage. “That’s not fair,” she growled, her voice guttural and deep.

“Not fair,” he snorted, allowing his tone to grow cold. “Not fair? This whole mess isn’t fair!” He had raised his voice and it echoed off the metal body of the ship. Simon didn’t care, not anymore, not about any of it. He just wanted to disappear, to leave all this craziness behind and go start over again, somewhere where no one knew him.

“For once, Simon Tam,” River said slowly, her tone now holding a calculated anger. At the use of his first and last name again, he met her gaze. “This is not about you. It’s about that girl back there,” she told him, gesturing over her shoulder toward Millie’s.

Why Simon felt any responsibility for Kaylee he had no idea. And why he felt guilty for his behavior irked him to no end. He shouldn’t, because for all anyone knew, he didn’t even know her. “I don’t owe her anything,” he told his sister bitterly.

“Oh yes, you do,” she told him quickly, moving to stand in front of him again. Forcing him to meet her gaze, she continued, and Simon could see the conviction in her features, the look that told him this was far from over. “You owe her the courtesy of at least trying. You owe her the decency of acting like a human being and not a closed off automaton!” It was River’s turn to yell and she did it, gladly. She’d had quite enough of this, of Simon’s self-pitying attitude, of Kaylee’s pain. She wanted it to end, she wanted her family back together and if yelling at her brother would do it, then she would yell until her throat was raw.

Simon staggered slightly at her words, falling back a few steps before catching himself. His internal conflict was starting to take its toll. He already felt like a failure due to his inability to remember; adding his sister’s guilt trip to the mix just intensified those already established feelings of self-loathing.

“She’d be better off if I hadn’t come back,” he finally admitted, his voice barely a whisper.

Her anger still fierce, River tried to soften her voice as she said, “You don’t know that.”

“And you do,” he asked, allowing his voice to grow hard.

She shook her head once, her features still set with grim determination. “No, I don’t. But I know Kaylee. Kaylee’s a girl who used to smile at any little thing. Who used to laugh with the light of a thousand fairies. Who used to be able to find the positive in the darkest places. Who used to put up with your idiocy, even when the whole ship thought she was crazy as a loon,” River told him, not pulling any punches. “But the girl that I saw yesterday, the girl I just left, that Kaylee, she’s losing that. She’s losing her ability to live with that unbridled passion. And she’s losing it because of you.”

He looked to her with a fierce gaze, his hurt easily outweighing his anger. “That’s not fair.”

“Refusing to see her, that’s not fair,” River told him, her voice still raised, her anger boiling. “Hiding out here, acting the coward, that’s not fair. Not to her.” Or your son, she wanted to add, but kept her tongue. That was Kaylee’s secret to tell, and she knew her friend would share it when she was ready.

River backed away from him for a minute, trying to gauge his reaction as he thought on her words. When it appeared he would still be unable to act, she stepped further away from him and said with finality, “If you don’t even try to get that back, at least a tiny piece of it, than you’re not the man I thought you were.” Turning she headed back outside. Thinking of one final thing, she looked over her shoulder at her brother’s dejected form and added, “And you surely aren’t the man Kaylee fell in love with.”

With that, she stalked off the ship, willing to wait by the mule until he came to his senses. She knew he would, he had to. Because even though Simon couldn’t remember Kaylee, he needed her, for a whole bunch of reasons he could not fathom and the very real reason that she could help him remember.

It took him over an hour, which did not surprise River. Her brother, the boob, was not that quick on the uptake. But when she turned to see him striding down the ramp of the ship, having changed into his nicest clothes, she had to smile.

As he came to meet her, he reached out and placed a light kiss on her cheek. “Thank you,” he said softly.

Smiling at him, she moved to get in, saying a silent prayer that all her yelling wouldn’t be for nothing.

***

Millie entered the dining room, her arms full of dishes containing the most delicious smelling food. Marie, Inara and Kaylee followed the woman out from the kitchen, their arms also weighed down with more for the table as everyone else took their seats. The table was large, had to be, in order to accommodate them all.

Mal surveyed the eight extra chairs and wondered where all the little ones were hiding. Save Ellie, the crew had not happened upon any of the rest of them all day. And now that it was chow time, he was surprised to not find them swarming the table; when he was growing up at the first smell of supper, it was advisable to get as close to the kitchen as possible.

Looking up to their hostess, Millie nodded in his direction. She was an amiable woman, so very much like her sister that Mal had liked her immediately. She had welcomed them all with open arms and an open heart, and he was glad to know that Kaylee and her son had been surrounded by such love these past few months. He hated to consider what her life would have been like if she’d been forced to suffer through that alone.

Pulling him from his thoughts, Millie cupped a hand to her mouth and let out a loud bellow. “Supper’s on! You all get down here!”

With the pounding of little feet on wood planking, the adults in the room jumped slightly, except for Kaylee, Walt, Marie and Millie, as eight little people bounded into the dining area, all charging in from different directions. Each of them took up a stance behind their designated chair, except for one small boy who entered slower than the other and sat immediately and for the smallest child, a girl, who stood in front of Kaylee with her arms outstretched, inviting the young woman to pick her up, which she did. Everyone else stood and waited for the whole family to assemble, falling in easily with the crew, taking their seats in and among them as though they had visitors all the time.

Millie watched with a critical eye as each child made it in, and smiled once they were all together. Placing her hands on her hips, she said, “Now, I know ya’ll are hungry, but seeing as we got visitors tonight, we’re gonna do introductions before we sit to have supper.” To Mal’s amazement not one of the children uttered a word at being delayed from their food, although not surprisingly, Jayne did. Shooting his merc a look, Jayne grumbled something incoherent and then fell silent again.

Glancing to the tallest kid at the table and probably the eldest, Millie said, “Milo, why don’t you start.”

He nodded once in her direction and then let his eyes roam around the table. With a cheery countenance and a bright smile, the boy said, “My name’s Milo and I’m ten. Did ya’ll really come in a spaceship?” His voice held the wonder of youth and made Mal smile.

As he was standing next to the captain, Mal clapped a hand on the young man’s shoulder. The boy turned his freckled face to him and smiled wider, and Mal answered, “We sure did, son. Maybe we’ll take ya out there tomorrow, so you can see her.”

He smiled again and nodded his appreciation, almost unable to believe his good fortune. “That’d be real nice of you, Malcolm,” Mille added, nodding in the boy’s direction. “Milo’s somewhat taken with ships. Wants to be a pilot some day.”

Zoe felt her heart twinge at the thought. The boy’s young face and freckles, coupled with his light hair gave him a look that had instantly reminded her of her husband. Stifling the thought, she turned her attention as the next child introduced himself. “I’m Ben and I’m seven and I hate ships.”

Smiling slightly, Mal watched as Millie reached out a hand and swatted the boy. Thinking he had a lot in common with Jayne, Mal turned his attention to the next. “I’m Ellie, and I'm five, and I’ve already met ya’ll, ‘member?” The little blonde haired girl from that afternoon looked to them all proudly, her chest sticking out at her boast. “You did indeed, little one,” Zoe told her, looking down as the girl was at her side.

Turning a gaze back up to her, Ellie’s brown eyes grew wide for another minute, before Millie hissed, “Ellie May, do not stare. It ain’t polite.”

Blushing at the scold, Ellie fixed her eyes back on the table as the girl next to her piped up. “I’m Cleo and I’m four.” The girl was darker skinned and quiet, she had barely raised her voice above a whisper, but instead looked hurriedly to Kaylee for approval. Kaylee nodded once at the girl with a huge grin on her face and Cleo immediately relaxed.

“I’m Tristan and that’s my sister, we’re twins,” the boy next to Cleo said. Indeed the resemblance was shocking. Taking her hand in his, he tried to still her shyness as he said, “She don’t like folk too much.”

“Tristan!” It was Milo’s turn to call the boy on his rudeness. Turning large brown eyes to the older boy, he hissed back, “Well, it’s true.” Giving him another look that clearly communicated this conversation was not over, they turned their attention to the last three children.

Mal watched the boy, the one who had instantly taken a seat, with a critical eye. Something wasn’t right with him that was obvious. His face was an ashen color that did not belong on a child. “I’m Elijah,” he said, his voice raspy and not that strong. “I’m eight.” With that, his little body shook with a cough that sounded painful at best. Marie was by him in an instant steadying him and encouraging him to take a sip of water. After his spell had past, he gave them all a weary grin and looked to the other boy at his side.

“I’m Isaac, and I’m four,” the red-headed child said, glancing to them all. “What’re ya’ll doing here?”

“Isaac,” all the kids hissed as one, getting a shocked and defiant expression from the boy. Shrugging slightly, he looked around and asked, “What?”

As they all rolled their eyes, Mal could tell this was a common occurrence. Finally there was just one little one left. The girl with black hair that flowed down past her shoulders had bounded into Kaylee’s arms the minute she’d entered the room. She had been very quiet the whole time, staring with those huge eyes as her brothers and sisters had introduced themselves.

Looking up to everyone, Kaylee announced, “And this is Cadie.” Whispering to her, Cadie held the other woman’s gaze for a moment and then shyly, held up three pudgy fingers. “And she’s three,” Kaylee finished, smiling proudly as the girl again wrapped her arms around her neck and buried her face in her hair.

“Well now, it seems only fittin’ we introduce ourselves as well,” Mal said, looking over to Millie and then around to his crew. “I’m Captain Malcolm Reynolds and I pilot that great boat you’re so interested in seeing Milo.”

“Huh, great boat,” Jayne snorted, getting a dirty look from Mal, River and Kaylee in the process.

“And ya’ll’ve already met Jayne and River,” Mal said, allowing a bit of his annoyance at his merc to show through. “And we got one other on our boat, Simon, he’s a doctor and River’s brother.” Mal tried not to throw a meaningful look at the sickly boy as he made this announcement, but he though for sure he saw Millie tense at the news.

“And I’m Inara,” the companion said, smiling widely at the children.

“And how old are you,” Ellie asked innocently, looking up to Inara as she stood between her and Zoe.

Blushing slightly and smiling, Inara didn’t answer, leaving Zoe to say, “That ain’t a question to be asking a lady, little one.” Getting a sheepish grin from Ellie in return, Zoe turned back to them all and said, “And I’m Zoe Washburn. Mal’s second-in-command.”

“But you’re a girl,” Ben blurted, getting hard looks from everyone.

However, Zoe for her part, kept her cool and looked the young boy square in the face. “Yes, son that’s true,” she said evenly. “But the fact of the matter is, I’m still smarter and stronger than the cap’n and he knows it. Ain’t that right, sir?” Zoe’s tone and eyes told Mal he had better not say the wrong thing.

“Darn straight,” Mal answered affirmatively as he took his seat. Glancing over to Ben he said, “Trust me, boy, it’s always a good idea to surround yourself with people both stronger and smarter than you. Don’t matter if’n it’s a girl or boy.”

Ben shrugged, still obviously not convinced, but unwilling to let the debate interrupt his dinner.

“All right, now that you all know each other, let’s eat,” Millie said, taking her seat and starting to pass around the food. After a quick grace, which all the children recited together, they dug in, the crew delighting in the fact that they were eating real, honest to goodness fruits, vegetables and meat. It was a rarity on Serenity and they reveled in the tastes.

As Zoe finished her first helping, she caught a slight movement out of the corner of her eye and glanced over to Ellie. The girl had deftly taken her napkin and rolled her green beans into it, concealing them from view. Trying to her hide her sudden smile, Zoe was still staring at her when the girl caught her gaze. Her cheeks immediately blushing, Ellie was sure she’d been caught. Her eyes wide, she looked to Zoe for a moment, her movements frozen.

With a wink and an even wider grin, Zoe covered the girl’s hand and took the bean-filled cloth into her lap, giving her own napkin to her in return. Sharing the older woman’s grin, Ellie went back to her plate, happily eating the rest of her supper. Zoe’s gaze returned to her own food, her appetite suddenly failing her as she tried simply to avoid the intense sadness that rested in her gut at the sight of the child and the fact that she and Wash had never gotten around to having one; and now, it was too late.

Mal glanced across the table to Inara, watching as she engaged the children and their hosts in easy conversation. She could talk to anyone, that was obvious and it made his heart swell with pride. She was a good woman, kind and gentle and loving and despite her best judgment, she loved him. He watched as her big eyes danced in delight as the children regaled her with stories, telling of how they had defeated Jayne earlier in the day. This of course elicited a grunt of consternation and a hurried defense from the older man which only deepened the children’s delight and Inara’s smile.

Mal smiled himself and wished that the doc and his sister had made it back in time for supper. These were the kinds of things Simon should be privy too, especially now that he was showing such obvious signs of avoidance. It angered Mal, probably just as much as River, that Simon had refused to come to the house with them, but he knew the boy was struggling and Mal had been okay with that, when he’d just been brooding on board. But now he was here, within spitting distance of Kaylee and he was a father. The resentment Mal felt towards the boy for his cowardly behavior was growing by the minute. He tried to reason that most of this, if not all of it, was not Simon’s fault, but still … Kaylee deserved to be happy again, and though it might baffle his mind, he knew she would be if Simon could only remember her.

Seeming to sense his thoughts, Kaylee turned her gaze from Marie and glanced to the captain, giving him a warm smile. It might not have been as big or as bright as he remembered, but it was a smile all the same. Returning the look, he caught Inara’s eye as he reached for seconds and his heart jumped at the sight of her smiling face. Deciding that maybe things weren’t as bad off as he wanted to believe, Mal again loaded up his plate and tried, really hard, to quell his concerns. Good food and good folk deserved all the attention one could muster, especially in a ‘verse such as theirs.

***

By the time River and Simon returned, dinner was over. The children played in the approaching dusk, while the adults sat on the porch, talking quietly. Kaylee had retreated after the meal, claiming she wanted to lie down and none of them had fought her on it. She’d been through quite enough, if she wanted a little peace and quiet who were they to tell her no.

Once they had parked the mule, River led a reluctant Simon up to the group. Smiling at him and then back to them all, she said, “This is Simon,” shoving him slightly in Millie’s direction.

Millie rose and came down the few steps to survey the boy more closely. She had her reservations about him, plenty of reservations in fact, seeing as how Kaylee had mentioned how great he was and he’d apparently been too afraid to even show up for dinner. However, she knew that the girl she had come to love and her baby needed this man before her, and considering all he’d been through she was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, but not for long.

Extending a hand, Simon looked up at her and the sadness in his features pulled at her heart, while his shockingly blue eyes made it skip a beat. This man was obviously little Danny’s father, the eyes alone confirmed that for her. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, ma’am,” he said stiffly, ashamed that he had missed supper, realizing how rude it was. “I’m Simon. I apologize for not making it for dinner. I was – indisposed.”

Jayne was the only person who made a rude comment, the others watching in anticipation as Millie eyed the young man’s outstretched hand. Finally, she clasped it firmly in her calloused one and smiled at him, immediately easing a majority of Simon’s fears. “Simon, it’s good to meet ya. I’m Millie Thompson and those rascals,” she said, gesturing to the cluster of children who ran about with abandon. “Are my little ones. Now, I’m guessing you’re a bit hungry boy, would you like some food?”

Simon smiled at her, a genuine grin that River recognized, as he said, “I don’t want to inconvenience you.”

Waving away his concern, she wrapped a strong arm around his shoulders and pulled him towards the house, River on their heels. “Nonsense. I won’t let a guest o’ mine go hungry. I don’t care who you are.”

Their voices faded as they retreated inside and the rest of the adults sat in a comfortable silence. Finally, unable to take the quiet, Inara turned to Marie and asked, “How has Kaylee been?”

Marie sighed heavily and exchanged a glance with Walt. Inara and the crew knew that Marie had traveled to Millie’s to help Kaylee with the birth, so they knew that the woman had seen more of her in the past few months than just about anyone, save her sister.

Turning wide eyes to the woman, Marie said quietly, “Sad. ‘Fore the baby came, I thought for sure she’d die of a broken heart,” she admitted, her eyes unexpectedly welling with tears. “She loves that boy somethin’ fierce,” she added, looking to where Simon had retreated just moments before.

“And after the baby,” Zoe asked, her eyes never leaving the knot of children as they played.

Marie looked to the other woman and then back to Mal and Inara. “Still sad, but less so. It was less intense somehow. She had that little one and he became her whole world.” Marie thought back to those first few days when Kaylee had been unwilling to let anyone else hold her son. She had latched onto him with a tenacity similar to that of a wild animal and nothing would keep them apart. Slowly, as the weeks passed, she had relented, finding it easier to leave him sleeping or asking Millie or Marie to watch him while she showered or took a nap. But Marie knew she still preferred to have him constantly at her side. “I ‘spose it was ‘cause he looked so much like Simon. She prolly felt it was the only way to keep a hold of ‘im.”

Inara placed a light hand over her mouth to keep her sobs from escaping. Mal could read her distress and he gently rubbed her back, thinking on his own sadness for Kaylee. Marie looked between them both and asked, “He really can’t remember her?”

Shaking his head slowly, Mal leaned forward and answered, “Nope. Just his sis, and that’s it. We’ve tried, ‘Rie, we have, but so far, nothin’.”

Marie accepted this startling information in silence and the group sat there each one trying to come to terms with what all of this could mean.

***

“Well, now you just take a seat righ’ over there and I’ll get ya both some food.” Simon and River dutifully did as they were instructed, Simon waiting until his sister had taken her seat before sitting down himself.

As Millie busied herself about the kitchen, pulling out leftovers and reheating, she watched the boy from the corner of her eye. He was sad, but it didn’t take a genius to puzzle that out. His blue, blue eyes which could not have been more similar to his son’s were dull with pain and the beleaguered look on his face bespoke of a stress that consumed him most every minute of every day.

His sister was another matter entirely. Millie had of course spent about a day with the girl and she could tell she was different. She had already taken to little Cadie, which in and of itself was a feat, but now, as Millie watched the young woman reach out and hold her brother’s hand as if to reassure him that she was still in the room, she saw a different type of pain reflected in her brown eyes. One of longing and regret, one of empathy. It was obvious to Millie River was feeling all her brother was and more.

“All right, now, there we go,” Millie said easily, depositing two heaping plates of food in front of them. “Now, go ‘head, eat up.”

Simon and River’s eyes both widened at the sight of so much fresh food, plus the delicious smells and vibrant colors made the whole experience of eating more tactile than a bowl of molded protein could ever be. While Simon had doubted his ability to get down anything, he found his appetite ravenous the minute he took the first bite.

Looking to Mille with a grin, Simon said, “Thank you, very much for this. It’s delicious.”

Millie nodded her thanks and watched as they ate. River, as might have been guessed by her tiny form, picked at the food like a bird, although in the end she had eaten quite a bit of it. Simon ate heartily, but with very exacting and precise bites, measuring each cut and building the perfect fork-full before swallowing it down.

As they began to finish, Millie asked quietly, “So, Simon, you and Kaylee were involved once upon a time?”

All the happy color drained from Simon’s face at her question. Dropping his gaze to the table, he said quietly, “So I’m told.”

“And now you don’t ‘member her, is that right?” Millie didn’t mean to be harsh with the boy, but she loved Kaylee, almost like one of her own and she certainly loved Daniel something fierce. And now, here was this pretty boy doctor, whom Kaylee had told her the ‘verse practically revolved around and not only could he not face the love of his life, he could barely raise his eyes to address an elder.

But then he did, meet her gaze and Millie’s breath caught in her throat. The pain she had sensed before pierced her now, traveling from those clear blue eyes and straight to her heart. With little apology in his tone or much of any emotion, he swallowed once and then said simply, “No, ma’am, I don’t.”

She held his gaze for a moment more and immediately felt shame for making the boy sadder than he already was. It weren’t her place to pass judgment on him or what he’d been through. And if Kaylee thought he was worth the trouble than Millie would too, she just hadn’t known him long enough was all.

Breaking the look, Millie rose to clear the dishes, and Simon rose with her; he truly was a gentleman. Placing his hands over hers as she reached for the diry plates, he said gently, “We’ll get these. It’s the least we can do.”

Millie looked to him once and then to his sister and nodded. He nodded back and murmured a “thank you” before walking the plates to the sink and starting the water. River followed him silently, ready to take up her familiar position as dryer to Simon’s washer.

Millie watched them work for a minute more and then headed back out to join the others, an unbearable sadness starting to weigh in her heart.

***

Walking onto the porch, Kaylee stopped in mid-stride, taking in all of their vacant expressions and the tension that surrounded them. Studying them closely for a moment more, she asked quietly, “What’s going on ya’ll?”

Inara was the first to recover, having had years of practice at hiding her own feelings. “Nothing, sweetie. We were just talking. Won’t you join us?”

Kaylee nodded once and took a seat next to her friend. When the silence again consumed them, she sighed heavily and stated, “You was talkin’ ‘bout Simon, weren’t ya?”

“You mean that sullen boy I just gave some supper too,” Millie interjected, again emerging from the house and resuming her seat. Kaylee stiffened slightly at the knowledge that Simon was inside, but managed to control herself as Mal answered the woman, “One in the same.”

“That boy’s in some pain,” Millie confided, looking to Kaylee. “He din’t say much, but it’s pretty obvious he’s tore up somethin’ fierce.”

In that moment, Ellie came running up and onto the porch, sitting next to Zoe. Looking down at her with curious eyes, Zoe placed a light hand on her head and asked quietly, “What’re you doin’ up here, lil’ one? You should be playin’.”

The girl shrugged at her and said, “I’m tired. Can’t I just sit here? I won’t bother nothin’, I promise.”

Her eyes pleading with Zoe to say yes, the older woman found it impossible to say anything else. Nodding, she again turned her attention to the conversation.

“He ain’t like what you described,” Millie told Kaylee, giving her a critical look. “Except for the looks part, the boy is definitely handsome,” she confirmed, getting a knowing smile from Kaylee in the process. “But otherwise, nothin’.”

Her eyes wide at the accusation, Kaylee floundered. “Millie, he don’t remember nothin’, but his sister. You’re gonna have to give him the benefit of the doubt.” When the older woman still looked skeptical, Kaylee reached out and squeezed her hand. “For me, please?”

Nodding once, Millie didn’t like it, but she would do it. Marie was the next to speak. “Kaylee, what happens if Simon doesn’t remember? Then what?”

Inhaling sharply at the thought, Kaylee felt Inara’s steadying hand against her back and threw a tight smile to her friend. “I don’t know, Marie,” she answered truthfully, willing her voice to stay steady. “I just don’t know.”

“Now, don’t go jumping to any conclusions,” Mal said, trying to turn the conversation away from this dark path. He could tell that each minute the conversation went on just served to pain Kaylee more and he hated it. “Let’s try to keep a little optimism here.”

Kaylee smiled her thanks at him, and leaning over gave him a kiss on the cheek. “I love my cap’n,” she murmured, and he smiled back at her, enjoying their private joke.

It was quiet again for a few minutes, until one little voice broke the newfound tension. Looking up to Zoe with wide eyes, Ellie asked loudly, “Who’s Simon?”

Just as all the adults were trying to think of the best way to answer her, River poked her head out on the porch and caught Kaylee’s eye. “Kaylee,” she called softly. “Can I see you for a minute?”

“Sure sweetie,” she answered and rising, she headed towards River knowing with almost certainty what the girl wanted to say and fearing the resulting conversation.

***

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