***

A NEW BEGINNING, ch. 25: Up & About

***

Simon’s recovery was coming along well. After his first few weeks of rehab, they had moved him out of ICU and up to one of the hospital’s top floors, where a suite had been prepared and paid for by his mother. The hospital room was appointed with not only all the medical equipment a recovering patient could need, but private cortex screens, a small kitchen, an extra bedroom where Daniel and Rylee now slept and a bed that Simon and Kaylee could sleep in that was actually made for two.

Such close proximity to his family did wonders for Simon and Kaylee both, and in just a few days, they were laughing and playing with their children as they had before the whole horrible incident.

As Kaylee again settled against Simon’s warm form, her body tired from the day’s activities and the two new lives she was growing, she felt her heavy eyelids droop shut almost immediately. With a sigh, she was soon drifting in a peaceful sleep, dreams of her son and daughter, happy and healthy, running and playing on Harvest as she and Simon watched from the porch of her parents’ house, each of them cradling a newborn.

Kaylee smiled even more contentedly in her dream, until she felt the cold approach of night. With a suddenness she did not expect she was again searching and stamping through those woods, those horrible woods where Keller had found them. Sharp branches bit at her skin, causing cuts to dot her face and arms, and Kaylee started to run, panting from exertion and calling for her husband.

“Simon!”

There was no answer but a wicked laugh and Kaylee increased her pace, calling for him again, her voice strangled as a sob rose to her lips. “Simon!”

And then suddenly, she had found him, lying at her feet … dead. With an anguished cry, Kaylee lunged forward, flinging herself on top of his lifeless form and sobbing uncontrollably. Murmuring his name over and over again, Kaylee heard his words to her, “I love you, remember that,” whispered like some farewell joke and she looked to his pale face, cradling his head in her hands as she pleaded with him. “Don’t go, Simon, please! Simon!”

As she continued to pant, bigger sobs wracking her chest, she looked up and around her and was confronted with an even more horrible sight – the dead bodies of her children. With renewed grief, Kaylee buried her head against Simon’s chest and again cried out, “No, no, no! Simon!”

With a start, Kaylee awoke, sitting up abruptly. Her eyes darted around the dim room and she finally brought them over to rest on Simon’s concerned face. He had managed to prop himself up on one arm, and as she sat forward, pulling her knees to her chest, he worked the controls on his side of the bed, bringing himself up to a sitting position.

When he was finally close enough, he reached out to touch her shoulder and Kaylee flinched away from him. Concern evident in his features, he said quietly, “Kaylee, please, look at me.”

Try as she might, Kaylee could not stymie her fear. Turning to face him, she saw his love for her and his fear at her current state etched into his features. “Simon,” she whimpered and then threw her arms around his neck, letting him rock and hold her like a small child.

Whispering to her, Simon ran his hand down and through her hair, trying to calm her. “Shh, it’s all right, Kaylee, I’m here.” He tried to soothe her for a bit more, but when he didn’t feel the intensity of her sobs dying down, he pulled her back slightly and placed a light hand to her cheek. “Kaylee, take a deep breath. You need to be calm. For the babies.”

The mention of her two new children brought renewed focus to Kaylee’s mind and with an effort she swallowed hard, taking a few deep breaths and managing to get her emotions under control. When she again looked into Simon’s blue eyes, she felt more tears welling in her own, but as they fell, she kept her sobs in check. Simon kept his hand to her cheek and whispered, “Tell me.”

Shaking her head, Kaylee again buried her face against his strong, broad chest and murmured, “Ain’t nothin’ to tell. Jus’ a dream is all.”

Sighing slightly, Simon thought about pressing the issue, but he knew there would be no point. If Kaylee wanted to tell him what she had dreamed, she would, but until she reached that conclusion herself, no amount of insistence on his part would make any difference.

Holding her tight against him, Simon sat back on his raised side of the bed, and Kaylee crawled over to his side, fitting herself on the small piece of mattress next to him. They lay there like that, as close as they could possibly be for a few more minutes, before Kaylee finally whispered, “You was dead.”

Simon, whose hand had absentmindedly been running through Kaylee’s hair, paused for a moment as her statement registered with him. Looking down to her, all he could see was the top of her honey-brown head. With a puzzled expression, he murmured, “What?”

Sighing heavily, Kaylee felt her tears falling evenly as she told him again, “We were in the woods and you were dead. And so were …” She bit her lip at the thought, the image of her dead children floating into her mind’s eye the minute she closed her eyes. Shivering slightly at the thought, she felt Simon hold her tighter as he prompted, “So were who?”

Turning tear-filled eyes to him, Kaylee said haltingly, “Danny and Ry.” As soon as she had uttered their names, Kaylee cried with a renewed pain, and Simon held her close, pressing a kiss into her hair. He had no idea how to take away her fear, her fear over what she’d seen, over all they had been through.

He cursed Keller’s dead and decaying body that he had caused his wife, his beautiful Kaylee, such grief, but there was nothing else Simon could think to do.

“Mama?”

The little voice startled them both and turning in the direction of the sound, Kaylee and Simon saw both their children standing in the doorway to their room. Shame coloring her cheeks as she realized she must have awakened them, Kaylee quickly rolled off the bed, going to kneel in front of them.

Looking to Rylee, as she was obviously the one who had spoken, Kaylee pressed a kiss to her cheek and said, “I’m sorry, baby. Did I scare you?”

The little girl nodded once, a few tears already dotting her cheeks. Looking to her son, Daniel moved forward and placed a hand to his mother’s shoulder. “You okay?” he asked her quietly, causing even more tears to fall down Kaylee’s face. Wrapping them both into a tight embrace, Kaylee whispered, “Yes, babies, I’m okay.”

The three of them stayed locked in their hug for a few moments, the terror from Kaylee’s dream beginning to diminish. Finally, the sound of a throat clearing got their attention and Kaylee, Daniel and Rylee all turned to regard Simon, sitting up in bed with his arms held open. “Can I get some of that?” he asked, a wide grin playing across his features.

All three of them grinning, Kaylee released her hold on her children who went bounding towards the bed, using a chair they had strategically placed to the side in order to climb up and into their father’s lap. As they wrapped Simon in a huge hug, Kaylee followed and crawled back in to her husband’s side, pressing a kiss to his lips, before settling herself more comfortably against the pillows.

Daniel and Rylee both settled in as well, even as Simon worked the controls on his bed to lower him back flat with Kaylee’s side; it was obvious to the parents that they would all be sleeping in the same bed tonight and neither of them cared.

Turning onto his side so he could face his wife, Simon rested a hand against her cheek, as Daniel curled up into his mother and Rylee curled up into her father. All four of them snuggling close, Kaylee fell asleep staring into Simon’s bright blue eyes, knowing that her family would again be all right.

***

With a sigh and a long, languid stretch, River opened her eyes, the sun streaming through the room’s open windows causing her to blink rapidly to adjust. Looking over to her side, she took in Jayne’s still slumbering form and she grinned. His arms were thrown up and over his head, his bare chest exposed as the blankets that had covered them were sitting down around his waist. Thinking of all manner of wicked things she could do to him, River allowed her face to form a pout as he rolled onto his side and away from her.

Oh, well, she’d just have to have fun later. Pushing herself up and out of bed, River grabbed her robe and pulled it on over the satin nightgown she wore, opening the doors to the veranda of their suite and stepping out into Greenleaf’s early morning.

Since Simon had been moved out of the ICU, her mother had graciously paid for two suites at what was probably the nicest hotel on Greenleaf. While she had initially gotten one for Kaylee and the children as well, Kaylee had made it very plain that she would not be straying from Simon’s side anytime soon, so now Regan, River and Jayne simply resided here, traveling the short distance to the hospital everyday by hovercar.

River enjoyed living in the relative luxury, although she would never admit it. It was nice to at least have a soft, comfortable bed and real food. Plus, she and Jayne had already indulged in the giant bath tub that took up half of the suite’s bathroom. A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth as she remembered that night, just a couple of days ago, when they had slipped into the warm and bubble-filled water together.

A small shiver of pleasure raced through her at the memory, and folding her arms in front of her, River leaned against the railing, letting the warm breeze of the morning wash over her face. It was unbelievably peaceful here and River was grateful for that. After all her mind and body had been forced to deal with in the past three months, peaceful had been a state she was sorely missing. And even though she was reveling in it now, she could feel the chaos, constantly nudging at the edges of her mind, trying to worm its way back in, and although she fought it, with all she had, River knew that some of the things she had been trying to ignore she would eventually have to confront.

Least of which was the information she had discovered on those data sticks. Another shiver ran up her spine, this one unpleasant, and River wrapped her arms tighter around herself. Although she had allowed Jayne to believe he’d convinced her that she was nothing like the living weapon the Alliance had wanted, River still saw those horrible images and words every time she closed her eyes. They were burned into her subconscious, plaguing her sleeping and waking states, and try as she might she could not rid herself of them.

While River had never fully recovered all of her memories from her time at the Academy, she had always known what had been done to her was far worse than her brother had ever imagined. And the information contained in those files had simply proven her right. Blinking back sudden tears, River’s mind drifted to the baby she lost and the sadness that filled her caused her to shiver again from the chill. The baby she’d lost, her daughter, who never should have suffered. Her daughter, Jayne’s daughter, an innocent, and had never done anything wrong, except to be conceived in River’s faulty body. It seemed so wrong somehow, so unfair and River still could not come to terms with it.

Two strong arms encircled her waist suddenly, causing River to inhale sharply at the contact. Feeling Jayne’s broad, muscled chest behind her, River’s surprise quickly gave way to content and she leaned back against him, even as he dropped his mouth to her shoulder and kissed her. Moaning just a bit at the contact, he tightened his grip, and whispered to her, “Mornin’.”

“Morning,” she said, her eyes closed so she could enjoy the sensation of floating in his arms. Running her hands down his arms, she pulled them tighter to her and sighed again, this time a tear or two leaking out of her shut eyes and down her cheeks.

Having brought his head around to kiss her, Jayne noticed her tears, even as he pressed a soft kiss to her mouth. Pulling back a bit, he turned her slightly in his embrace so he could see her face, and placing both his hands to her cheeks, coaxed her into opening her eyes so he could see the tears there. Concern radiating from his blue-eyed gaze, he murmured, “Ai ya, River, what s’matter?”

Shaking her head quickly, River buried her face against his bare chest and wrapped her arms around him tightly. “Nothing,” she muttered, her voice muffled against him.

Knowing that was an outright lie, Jayne pulled her back and said, “I know it ain’t nothin’.” When she continued to avert her eyes, he took her hands in his and said quietly, “You ain’t gonna tell me, are ya?”

Smiling slightly, even as a few more tears formed and fell, River lifted her face to meet his gaze, and felt her breath catch in her throat. He was a handsome man, she had always known that, and damn sexy, but nothing had ever meant more to River than the way he was looking at her right now – with an expression full of such love and compassion, she felt her heart melt. Placing a light hand to his face, she said, “It’s all in the past, Jayne. I’m just trying to keep it there.”

Realization dawning, Jayne backed up a few steps, keeping her hands in his and sat in one of the lounge chairs. Pulling her with him, River folded herself neatly into his lap, her hands around the back of his head, her fingers running absentmindedly through his hair. “That stuff? That info your ma found,” he questioned, bringing up a hand to brush her soft hair back off her shoulder. “Is that whatcha yer talkin’ ‘bout?”

She nodded once, and then buried her head into the crook of his neck and shoulder, feeling his arms again wrap around her and hold her tight. There had been a time when only Simon had been able to make her feel loved, but she had known, from the first moment that Jayne had held her, that he would make her feel safe and loved for the rest of her life. Sighing a bit, they stayed like that in silence, until finally he asked her, “You wanna talk about it?”

River smiled slightly, knowing that the last thing her husband wanted to do was talk about what she had seen in those files. But he was trying so hard to be supportive, to help her and so he had asked, and she knew that if she said yes, if she decided she did want to talk, he would listen and try to help as best he could. But what he didn’t understand, and River did, was that there was literally nothing he could do.

Pulling back from him a bit, River kissed him, deeply and passionately, loving the feel of Jayne running his hands up her back and into her hair, pulling her closer. When they finally parted for air, River kissed him again lightly and he murmured against her mouth, “I’m guessin’ that’s a no.”

Giggling just a bit, River smiled at him and finally answered, “Jayne, there’s nothing to talk about. It’s done now, and the only thing left for us to do is move on.” Pausing, she took a deep breath and wished that she could take her own advice, but she knew it would a long, slow process. Glancing back to him, she continued, “That’s what I’m trying to do, it’s just not as easy as I thought it would be.”

Cradling her cheek in his large palm, he said quietly, “Prolly ‘cause you need to talk to somebody.” Furrowing his brow just a bit, he asked, “Why don’tcha talk to Simon? Maybe he can help.”

With a sudden fear shooting through her, River pushed herself up and off of his lap, backing away from him. Shaking her head vehemently, River told him sternly, “No, Jayne, no. Simon can never know about any of it. Promise me you won’t tell him.”

His concern giving way to confusion, Jayne rose and approached her, watching as she continued to back away from him, holding her arm out to keep him at bay. Just as he was about to inquire after her behavior, River raised her eyes to his and bit out, “I mean it, Jayne. Not a word. You have to promise.”

He watched as more tears came and her chest heaved with sobs she was trying to withhold. Moving towards her again, he was relieved when she let him get close enough to put his hands on her shoulders. “Why,” he asked her gently, his eyes pleading with her to give him an answer that made sense. “You know he’d wanna help. He’d wanna know, baby girl.”

Shaking her head, River felt more tears fall as she told him, “That’s why he can’t know.” Shivering again at the thought, River stepped closer to him and Jayne pulled her into a tight embrace. River’s mind reeled as she considered the backlash of her brother finding out all she now knew. The results would be devastating for both him and his family. River could not allow that to happen.

He had to let her go, that much was plain to all of them. Simon had to learn to let River lead her own life, find her own path and he was just starting to accept it. But she knew that if she told him, if she showed him the extent of what the Blue Hands had subjected her too, he would hold onto her with a vengeance, his determination to fix her quick to outpace any rational thought. And it would cost him Kaylee and Daniel and Rylee and their new children, and River could not let that happen.

Part of her wanted too and she hated that about herself. Part of her had wanted to go running to Simon the minute she had learned the truth about her baby, about all of it. But she couldn’t do that to him. Besides, the strong and loving man who was with her now was her husband, and he deserved the chance to be the person she ran to, with good news or bad. He deserved her whole heart, just as Kaylee deserved Simon’s. And that was what River had vowed to give him.

Tilting her head up to meet his concerned gaze, River asked quietly, “Jayne, please, promise me. Not a word to Simon. Not ever.”

Still confused, Jayne nodded slowly, wishing he could understand the bond River shared with her brother. Pressing a soft kiss to her mouth, he told her, “If that’s what you want, I won’t say nothin’.”

Kissing him again, River nodded as she again pressed her cheek against his chest. Taking a deep breath and inhaling his comforting scent, she murmured, “That’s what I want.”

***

Kaylee could only shake her head sadly as she stood in the doorway of the room her children had been sharing at the hospital. Although they had only been in it for a little over two weeks, the small space was strewn with all manner of toys and books and games and Kaylee thought fleetingly of their small bunks on Serenity, where it was so much easier to keep things contained.

With a bit of sigh, she entered the room and began straightening. River and Jayne had come to take her little ones, while Simon was at his rehab appointment, the idea being that Kaylee would get some rest and relax. But of course, as a mother of two and a working one at that, Kaylee had only been able to lie down for about twenty minutes before her restlessness overwhelmed her and she’d started to bustle, first straightening her and Simon’s room, before deciding to tackle the kids’ mess.

Humming a bit to herself as she picked up colored pencils and straightened stacks of Rylee’s drawings, Kaylee smiled as she picked one up that was of the four of them. In the drawing, Kaylee and Simon stood side by side, Daniel and then Rylee standing next to them. While the sun was shining from the upper right hand corner of the page, Kaylee had to grin when she noticed they appeared to be standing in front of a big blobby shape that could only be her daughter’s attempt to draw Serenity.

Blinking back a few tears, Kaylee folded the picture up and stuck it in her pocket, before going back to her work. She was just about finished when she heard the door to their suite of rooms open and close, and Kaylee stood slowly, stretching out her back, expecting her children to come bounding into the room at any minute. When they didn’t and when she didn’t hear their chattering voices, her heart filled with a bit of anxiety.

Hurrying from the room, she called out, “River? Jayne? Is that you?”

Stopping in the threshold to what served as the suite’s common room, Kaylee felt her knees buckle and she had to place a hand against the doorway to steady herself. Her breath catching in her throat, Kaylee could only stare in disbelief at the sight in front of her now.

Directly across from her, framed in the closed doorway, was Simon, standing. He was leaning a bit on a cane to his side, but he was standing, on his own two feet, a wide, swai grin spread across his face. Taking a full minute to recover, Kaylee finally managed to get out, “Simon … you – you’re standing.”

Smiling even bigger at her, he cocked an eyebrow and said mischievously, “It gets better.” And then, with a halting step, but a step nonetheless, he started to walk towards her.

By the time he reached her, he was panting a bit from the exertion, his forehead covered in a light sweat as his body again became acclimated to so much movement. But he was there, in front of her and keeping a tight hold on the cane in his right hand, he reached up his other hand to her cheek and rested it there gently.

At the simple touch, all of Kaylee’s joy and happiness gave way to tears and she cried, even as her smile continued to grow. Smiling sheepishly at her, Simon rubbed his thumb along her cheek, catching some of her tears as he chided, “What’s the matter? You wanted me to stay an invalid forever?”

Shaking her head, Kaylee laughed at him and then threw her arms around his neck. Simon had been prepared for her enthusiastic reaction and so he braced himself for her added weight, only grimacing slightly as she threw him a bit off balance.

Wrapping his free arm around her waist, he held her tightly, burying his face in her shoulder. “Ai ya, it feels so good to hold you,” he murmured, his breath tickling her neck.

Kaylee could not answer him, her tears still falling steadily, so she nodded instead and held on tighter. After a few minutes, she managed to get her emotions under control and she pulled back a bit to look into his eyes. “Why din’t you tell me you were doin’ so good?” Kaylee’s face was truly conflicted, her happiness at him being up and about, clouded by the fact that he had kept her in the dark about the status of his recovery.

Taking her hand, Simon pulled her over to one of the room’s couches and sat her down, before sitting gingerly himself. It still hurt, of course, the pain in his back alternating between a dull ache to a sharp stab depending on the position he was in, but Simon felt such relief at his newfound range of motion, he shouldered the pain gladly.

Once he was comfortable, Kaylee scooted close to him, her legs tucked up underneath her and one hand resting lightly against his head where she started to run her fingers through his hair. Taking a deep breath and sighing at her touch, Simon turned a bit to face her and smiling, said, “I wanted to wait, until I could walk to you, before I told you anything.”

Returning his smile, Kaylee felt a few more tears come and leaning forward she pressed a kiss to his mouth, sighing against him as he reached up to cup her head in his hand, pulling her closer. Kaylee felt a familiar desire burn through her and even as she allowed her tongue to explore his mouth, she knew that the next month, while Simon continued to heal, would be a test of both their will powers. Sighing again with contentment as they parted, Kaylee unwound her legs and draped them across Simon’s lap, resting her head against his shoulder.

Wrapping an arm around her shoulders, he held her close, pressing a kiss into her hair as they sat there. As the minutes ticked by, Kaylee finally glanced up to him and asked, “So, what did the docs say? ‘Bout how you’re doin’?”

Looking to her, Simon smiled and said, “Well, they’re very pleased with my progress and think that within another month or two, I should be fully healed.”

It was as Kaylee had suspected, but that didn’t stop the pout from rising to her lips, which her husband noticed. Placing a finger under her chin, he brought her face back up to meet his gaze and asked softly, “What?”

Huffing a bit, she told him sadly, “It’s just that by the time we can be sexin’ again, I’m gonna be all fat from these babies.”

At her admission, Simon actually let his head fall back and he laughed, long and loud. The happy sound was infectious and Kaylee was soon giggling right along with him, both of them blinking away tears of joy as they managed to get themselves under control. Turning to her with another swai smile, he held her gaze and said, “You know that I think you are the most beautiful woman in the ‘verse. Pregnant or not pregnant.”

She grinned at his compliment and pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth, as he continued, “Besides, do you really think that’s going to stop me from making love to you?”

Wiggling her eyebrows mischievously, Kaylee told him in a sultry tone, “Well, I certainly hope not.” Leaning forward, she placed her lips right to his ear, smiling wider as she felt him shiver at her closeness. “Plus, you know how worked up I get when I’m pregnant.” Darting her tongue out of her mouth, she licked slowly around his ear, causing him to groan a bit, before she placed a kiss to his neck. “It’s a good thing you’ll be well rested.”

Chuckling deeply again, Simon pulled her tight to him and kissed her, hard and long on the mouth. As Kaylee returned his kiss and allowed her hands to wind their way into his soft hair, she grinned with newfound enjoyment as the two of them made out like teenagers for the rest of the afternoon.

***

On the third day following Inara’s accident, the doctor released her back to Millie’s clinic. She moved slowly, even with Mal’s strong arm around her waist and Mimi’s little hand in hers, but without too much effort, she was able to get comfortably situated in a bed at Millie’s and both Mal and Mimi felt better having her close.

However, Mal’s overall anxiety over Inara’s welfare had been growing. She had been quiet, exceedingly quiet, whenever he had come to see her at the doc’s. Truthfully, he had spent almost every waking moment with her, and they had barely talked. She had occasionally cried a few tears, but always in silence and whenever he had tried to comfort her or hold her, Inara had pushed him away, telling him that she was still in too much pain.

So now, with a large lump lodged in his throat, he was standing outside the door to her room, trying to work up the courage to speak with her. Millie had examined her as soon as they’d gotten back and the smile on her face when she’d greeted Mal gave him hope. With a final sigh, as he realized prolonging the inevitable would more than likely not change the outcome, he rapped lightly on the door and then pushed it open.

Inara was sitting up in bed, her hands folded in her lap and her eyes cast down. She did not look up at his entrance or even acknowledge his presence, only causing Mal’s anxiety to again skyrocket. Walking hesitantly to the side of the bed, Mal sat in the chair there and resting his elbows on his knees looked up into her face.

She was crying again and Mal hated it. He had always hated it when Inara cried. Her beautiful face and her big eyes were not meant to hold such sadness, they were meant to convey unbridled joy and it pained him to know that she was crying now over something he could have prevented – something he should have prevented.

Reaching out, he placed his hand over hers and while she did not pull away, she said in a quiet voice, “Go away, Mal.”

Shaking his head, he told her firmly. “No, we’re in this together. I ain’t goin’ nowhere.”

Raising her face to look at him, he saw her sadness colored by a bit of anger. In a cold voice she asked him, “Together? You think we’re in this together?” Pulling her hands away and crossing her arms over her chest, she told him, “I lost our baby, Mal. Me. We are not in this together.”

Stubbornly, he shook his head again, and this time sat next to her on the edge of the bed. As she again averted her eyes, he told her firmly, “Yes we are. I ain’t sayin’ you ain’t in a whole lot more physical pain than me right now, but that baby was mine too. I lost a kid, same as you.”

His words brought more tears to her eyes and Inara blinked them back quickly. “Maybe you should have thought of that before you made that bitch an enemy.”

Reeling as though he had been slapped, Mal backed up from her a bit, his stomach churning at the harshness of her words. In just one sentence she had been able to sum up all of his self-recriminations, and hearing her speak them only made his guilt that much worse. “I never thought that …”

“Of course not, Mal,” Inara shot back, whipping her head back to face him and squinting her eyes at him angrily. “Of course you never thought, because it’s all about the odds. The odds were she’d never find you again. You took the chance we’d be safe.” Leaning forward a bit, she bit out coldly, “You took a gamble, and you finally lost.”

Unable to hear anymore for fear that he’d say something he’d regret, Mal backed up off the bed and headed for the door. Pausing before it, he turned back and said quietly, “I’m sorry, ‘Nara. I never wanted this.” Waiting another beat, he murmured, “I love you and Mimi and I loved that baby too.”

And then, before his tears came, before he could hear her sob, he headed from the room, closing the door soundly behind him. Rushing out of the clinic, he paced away from the homesteads at a clip, determined to get some distance on this horrible situation. He was feeling so much at once, he finally had to stop and take a few deep breaths, his body threatening to hyperventilate if he did not. His anger, rage and grief were now tied inexplicably to his guilt, sadness and pain. Mal was not a stranger to any of these emotions, but now, a common thread running through it all was love – his love for Inara. He did not want to lose her, he couldn’t. He had taken that one final leap over four years ago, asking her to be his wife and when she’d accepted he had felt his life change for the better.

And he had never once regretted his choice. But now, now that he had seen that anger in her eyes, now that he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she did blame him for had happened to their unborn child, he could not breathe, he could not think, he could barely function. The only thing that kept him going was his little girl, who did not understand any of what was happening, but who still needed him – when apparently his wife did not.

At a loss, Mal found a large weeping willow tree and leaned against its trunk, resting his head against the bark and sighing heavily, trying the whole time not to give into the despair he felt clouding his heart.

***