Sign Up | Log In
BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - GENERAL
River and Jayne? But how? Zoe and Mal arrested, BlueHands in pursuit, and our most unlikely heroes must save the day.
CATEGORY: FICTION TIMES READ: 4686 RATING: 9 SERIES: FIREFLY
Firefly: "Called on Account of Rayne" TEASER EXT. SPACE - NIGHT SERENITY sails silently through the void. A beat to establish and then - INT. SERENITY MAIN CORRIDOR - NIGHT MAL and ZOE walk together, headed towards the cockpit. MAL I know what you're going to say. ZOE Yes sir. MAL So say it and let's get it over with. ZOE Sir, I just don't think we should be going near any core worlds any time soon. MAL And if the 'verse were on our side, we wouldn't have to. But you heard Kaylee - ZOE Yes sir, I did. She said that fuzzbuster we got from Reid could give us an extra hour's warning of an approaching Alliance ship. MAL That hour could make the difference between a successful salvage and prison. But we need a yu bun duh adaptor to hook it up to our very old, but nonetheless functional comm system. ZOE Does it make sense, if what we're trying to achieve is less trouble from the Alliance to head straight into Alliance territory? MAL One quick trip, that's all. If it works, we'll - Mal pauses. They're standing right in front of Jayne's cabin. The faint sounds of lovemaking coming from within. ZOE Sir? Mal holds his finger up to his lips to shush Zoe. MAL Now that's something we don't hear every day. From inside the room, JAYNE moans in pleasure. A female voice giggles. ZOE That's something I'd hoped never to hear. MAL goes to knock. ZOE (CONT'D) Sir? Should we interrupt such a special private moment? MAL Damn straight. MAL knocks. MAL (CONT'D) Jayne! I don't recall approving any passengers, she paying her way? The noises from within stop. The girl giggles again. SIMON walks up behind Mal and Zoe. SIMON Captain, I have some concerns about this trip to Euterpe. River was acting really - MAL 'Scuse me a moment, Doctor, I have a little matter of shipboard security and discipline to attend to. ZOE The captain wouldn't do anything to put all our lives in danger, Doctor. Would he, sir? Mal knocks a little louder. MAL Jayne, get decent - (sigh) Get yourself and your little friend there as decent as you can, I'm coming in. SIMON Has anyone... (beat) Seen River recently? She's not in her room. Zoe gets a startled look, which turns to horror as she figures it out. ZOE Um, sir? She taps Mal on the shoulder. Mal busts the door open. INT. JAYNE'S CABIN - NIGHT JAYNE's in his bed, naked except for what the blanket covers. RIVER pokes her head out, looking a little awkward as Simon stares, his mouth moving like a fish gasping for air as his brain struggles to keep up. MAL (mutters) Shun-SHENG duh gao-WAHN! ZOE Yes, sir. Simon finds his voice. SIMON Son of a bitch! END TEASER ACT ONE INT. JAYNE'S CABIN - NIGHT, MOMENTS LATER Right where we left off. Simon's non-violent personality wars with his need to hit someone or something. MAL Uh, Jayne? JAYNE Mal, I can explain! ZOE I'd rather you didn't. RIVER (holds hands to her ears) Too much yelling! MAL Nobody's yelling. SIMON Son of a bitch! MAL Well, almost nobody. SIMON Mei mei, why? RIVER There were no storms here. Now it's windy again. I liked the sky clear. Zoe raises an eyebrow. JAYNE River an' me, we...came to an understanding. MAL I'm trying real hard, but I'm not with the understanding part. Neither, it seems, is the good Doctor. However, let's discuss this somewhere's with more room an' more clothes. He nods to Zoe, they leave. RIVER It's not chemistry! INT. JAYNE'S CABIN - NIGHT TITLE CARD: One Week Ago... Jayne tosses and turns in the midst of a nightmare. RIVER (V.O.) And also? I can kill you with my brain. SIMON (V.O.) That's a scalpel scar. They... they opened up her skull and they cut into her brain. RIVER (V.O.) Christmas didn't come. SIMON (V.O.) While you are on this table... JAYNE (V.O.) It's a girl. She's cute, too, but I don't think she's all there, y'know? SIMON (V.O.) She feels everything; she can't not. JAYNE (V.O.) What's wrong with my 'pine? RIVER (V.O.) It's not what it appears. JAYNE (V.O.) The money was too much. SIMON (V.O.) She feels everything; she can't not. JAYNE (V.O.) I don't much like someone being able to hear my thoughts. RIVER (V.O.) And also? I can kill you with my brain. Jayne wakes up, bathed in sweat. River stands beside the bed with a sympathetic expression on her face. JAYNE What're you doing here? RIVER Two by two, hands of blue. JAYNE What? Two BLUE HANDS stand behind River, holding the plastic bar. A high pitched whine begins. Jayne's nose starts bleeding and he winces in pain. He reaches for his gun rack, grabs Vera, turns and - WAKES UP. River and the others are gone. JAYNE (CONT'D) KWAI chur hun-rien duh di fahng! Keep away from me! He turns, River sits next to him on the bed. She strokes his shoulder sympathetically. RIVER Welcome to my nightmare. I really hope you like it. JAYNE No. RIVER I wasn't born a killer. I was conscripted. They've got to keep the house from falling down, all those faces and numbers but the centre will not hold. She turns to leave. The back of her head is missing, exposing her brain. Multicoloured wires poke out and connect one lobe to another. RIVER (CONT'D) Got to go now. More tests to run. JAYNE WAKES UP, rubs his face with his hands. He looks around the room, peeking between his fingers. JAYNE Ay ya! EXT. SPACE - NIGHT Serenity is attached to the side of an asteroid. An ALLIANCE CRUISER passes by in the b.g. INT. SERENITY'S COCKPIT - NIGHT WASH leans back in his chair, feed up on the control panel, watching the monitor as the Cruiser passes by. Jayne enters. JAYNE Any sign of Zoe an' Mal? Wash startles. WASH Could you be a little less stalky? (beat) No, they haven't signalled yet. Of course with Charlie out there - (indicates the cruiser) They're probably not going to say much over the radio. JAYNE How 'bout Inara? WASH Not due until morning. (beat) Say, I'll bet Book would love to lift weights with you, why don't you go ask him? Wash looks eager to get Jayne out of his sanctum as soon as possible. Jayne shrugs, walks away. JAYNE Nah. He's sleepin', lucky hwoon dahn! Jayne shuffles away. Wash looks relieved. A moment or two later, and he brings out two hand puppets. WASH (puppet voice) And now my dear, would you like a cup of tea? INT. SERENITY'S KITCHEN - NIGHT Jayne walks in, sees River sitting there, drink in hand. JAYNE Uh, never mind. He turns to go. RIVER Sorry I dragged you along. Jayne stops, turns. JAYNE What? RIVER It's too late. Can't wash hands of it now. They don't like dirt they can't clean. JAYNE You know, in a crazy-assed way, you're starting to make sense. (beat) I need a drink. RIVER Here, helps keep the whispers from tickling. She hands him a flask. Jayne sniffs it, then looks pleased with the smell. JAYNE Say, this is - RIVER (in cockney accent) 'Ee sometimes uses it when gold don't shine so good. Eye pinched it from his ol' elephant and kettle. Jayne takes a drink. JAYNE Sounds like Badger. You steal it from him? River nods. RIVER You have a question? Jayne takes a long drink, then a long breath. JAYNE Them blue hands guys... RIVER Got to keep the loonies on the path. JAYNE When we was on Ariel... RIVER Shh! It's a secret. JAYNE They was what killed those men? RIVER With their brains. Jayne stops and takes this in. Being Jayne, it takes a while. JAYNE So what do they want? RIVER Sweep under the rug, the dirt gathers there. Pretend it doesn't exist. It thinks it knows what's happening, but it doesn't. Jayne's heard enough. JAYNE Thanks for the drink. Jayne gets up to go. River touches his arm gently. RIVER Stay. Ocean's quiet enough you can see the bottom. I want to listen. JAYNE Huh? RIVER Sing me your song. JAYNE What? You mean - (sings ballad of Jayne) Our love for him ain't hard to explain... River brightens. RIVER Sing me all your songs. I want to hear them. JAYNE I only got the one. INT. SERENITY'S ENGINE ROOM - NIGHT Kaylee wakes up in her hammock, stretches and yawns. She stumbles out of it, pats her engine affectionately and stumbles down the hall. INT. SERENITY'S KITCHEN - NIGHT Kaylee walks over to the coffee machine and starts it, yawning heavily It produces two cups and she takes both, walking back the way she came. The flask remains on the table. She frowns at it as she walks by but doesn't bother investigating. Behind her, in the b.g., Jayne and River are asleep on the couch. EXT. SPACE - NIGHT INARA'S SHUTTLE comes in for a landing. The platform retracts and snaps into place. INT. DOCKING BAY - DAY BOOK greets INARA as she disembarks. INARA Hello, Shephard. I didn't expect a formal welcoming committee. BOOK I have few responsibilities on this ship, I thought I might add to them, even unofficially. How was your trip? INARA My client was inoffensive but dull. How is your flock? BOOK Mostly still asleep. We've been laying low, and with Mal and Zoe gone, things have been surprisingly quiet. INARA I would've thought you would have your hands full, managing Jayne and the Tams. BOOK The Lord works in mysterious ways. I'm afraid He's got me this time. Kaylee walks up. She sees Inara and smiles. KAYLEE Hey, Inara! Have good sex? INARA Nothing exceptional. KAYLEE Maybe next time. (to Book) Morning, Shepherd. BOOK Morning, Kaylee. Are we moving yet? KAYLEE Nope, I'd know it if we were. I'm just on my way to bug Wash. BOOK So, no sign of Mal or Zoe? KAYLEE Aw, you know them when they're with old war buddies. EXT. DESERT - DAY Mal and Zoe kneel with their hands on their heads. Behind them are a row of Alliance troops. Beside them on the ground is the BODY of a man Mal's age, with red-stained sand near where his head came to rest. MAL Not quite the reunion I expected. An ALLIANCE SOLDIER cuffs Mal across the jaw. Mal spits blood. MAL (CONT'D) I wasn't talking to you, I was solliloquizing. He hits Mal again. ALLIANCE SOLDIER Be quiet. (to radio) Alliance Cruiser Halder, this is Field Unit 9391, requesting immmediate dust off. We have two prisoners in custody, over. The radio blurts static. MAL Don't make 'em like they used to, do they? He hits Mal again. ALLIANCE SOLDIER (to the other troops) All right. We have temporarily lost contact with the ship. We'll hold position and set up base camp until contact is restored and we get further orders. Secure the prisoners. MAL I already feel secure. The soldier hits him again. Zoe gives Mal a look, as if to say, "Stop getting yourself beat up," but remains silent. The soldiers break formation and begin setting up their camp. One places cuffs on Mal and Zoe, then leaves them to join the others. MAL (CONT'D) (shouting after them) I'm a might thirsty, do you think you could rustle up a canteen? They ignore him. ZOE (hushed tones) Sir, is it wise to provoke them? MAL You think this is just me bein' a stubborn, disrespectful cuss? Takin' out my resentment against the Alliance on my own pretty face? ZOE The thought did occurr to me, sir. (beat) Although Unification Day is still three months away. MAL Well, as a matter of fact, I was merely providing a distraction. ZOE To what purpose, Sir? Lull them into a false sense of superiority? They already have that. MAL Oh, ye of little faith. Mal twists his back so Zoe can see his hands. He's palmed the pass card key to their cuffs. ZOE It's been an honour serving with you, Sir. Mal releases his cuffs with the pass card, then Zoe's. They watch the Alliance troops assembling their field shelters,wait for a moment when they're all distracted, then run for it. One does notice and draws his weapon to fire. END ACT ONE ACT TWO INT. INARA'S SHUTTLE - NIGHT Inara gets up as someone enters. INARA Look, Mal, I - She sees Jayne come in. JAYNE Ain't Mal. INARA Jayne? What do you want? JAYNE I want to buy a present for somebody. INARA (crossing arms) I'm not someone's present. JAYNE No! No. I don't mean sex, I - (beat) I want to buy a present for someone, a girl, and I need your advice on account of - INARA I'm a girl? JAYNE Yeah, and uh, I want to buy her something nice, you know, girl stuff. INARA What's the occasion, dare I ask? JAYNE What? INARA What's the intent of the present? What do you want out of it? JAYNE (shrugs) I dunno, make her happy, I guess. (thinks; snaps finger) Oh! Friends! I want us to be friends. Inara needs to sit down. INARA So, this is a present for a girl - JAYNE Yep. INARA Who you want to be friends with. JAYNE Yeah... INARA And nothing else? JAYNE (thinks hard) Well... (beat) I guess, I don't know, sure. It don't really matter though. INARA Who IS she? JAYNE Do I have to say? INARA I'm just...in awe, that's all. Whoever she is, she must be pretty special. JAYNE (chuckles) Yeah, you could say that. INARA How soon will you see her again? JAYNE I dunno, soon. Maybe tonight. INARA But we're - She's on the ship? JAYNE Yeah, it's River, if you gotta know. INARA I'm sorry. What? JAYNE We're, I dunno, comin' to an understandin'. INARA I'm glad somebody has. JAYNE Pardon? INARA I think I need to lie down for a while, could you come back later? JAYNE Uh, sure. Jayne gets up and leaves. Inara reaches over and douses her incense. INT. COCKPIT - NIGHT Kaylee offers a cup of coffee to Wash. WASH Oh, thanks, but no thanks. I never drink coffee when I'm flying, or about to fly at any minute. Gets me nervous. KAYLEE But you're never nervous when you fly. WASH Exactly. KAYLEE So you're sayin' if you had a cup, you'd be a jittery wreck? WASH And shortly thereafter, so would Serenity. KAYLEE Perish the thought. Kaylee looks out at the stars. Wash taps an instrument panel that's flickering. WASH So how's your end? KAYLEE Pardon? WASH Of the ship. KAYLEE The synchronizers we picked up on Ariel make a funny noise now and then. Other than that, no complaints. She pretty much purrs and hisses right when I expect. WASH (nods) Hmm. Kaylee pats him on the shoulder. KAYLEE Don't worry. Mal and Zoe always come back. That's why they're Mal and Zoe. WASH I know. We've done this hundreds of times together, but, I don't know, somehow, it's...different. KAYLEE Why? WASH Because it's not just Mal and Zoe any more. It's Mal and The Future Mother of My Child. Kaylee squeaks. KAYLEE Oh my God! Zoe's pregnant? This is incredible! Kaylee looks like she's vibrating in place she's so excited. Wash makes shushing gestures with his hands, looking nervous. WASH Well, no. Not, yet, really. KAYLEE Huh? WASH Zoe and I had a long talk after our encounter on Hera. (beat) You see, before I never thought it was such a good time in our lives to be even thinking about raising a family, you know, but well, you know Zoe. We talked, and talked, and she (gulps) ...persuaded me and ...threatened a little. (looks wistful) After a while, I started to like the idea. A little version of me and Zoe running around. So, we've been thinking about it. (shrugs) And practicing, you know. We want to get it right. (blushes) And I am going to get in all kinds of danger for blabbing this much, so keep it quiet, dong-ma? Kaylee makes an X across her chest. KAYLEE Cross my heart. I promise. She pats him on the shoulder again. Kaylee looks, smiling, up at the stars. Wash checks another instrument panel, in an absent-minded worried kind of way. KAYLEE (CONT'D) So have you thought of any names yet? Wash bangs his forehead on the console repeatedly. INT. TAM CABIN - NIGHT Simon wakes up slowly, stretches and yawns. SIMON How did you sleep? He turns around. River isn't in the cabin. He rubs his forehead. SIMON (CONT'D) TYEN shiao-duh! He gets up, grabs the nearest shirt and throws it on. SIMON (CONT'D) River? INT. SERENITY'S CARGO HOLD - NIGHT Simon rushes to and fro, searching. Book walks along the catwalk above. SIMON River? BOOK I thought I saw her in the observation lounge. SIMON Oh, of course. She likes looking at the stars. Thank you, Shephard Book. Simon climbs the stairs to the catwalk. BOOK (quietly smiling) "And the rock cried out, no hiding place from The Lord." SIMON Yes, of course, thank you. BOOK You're welcome. Just keeping the flock together. INT. SERENITY'S OBSERVATION LOUNGE - NIGHT River sways to and fro as if she was a willow tree in a gentle breeze, smiling, eyes closed. She frowns and stops seconds before Simon rushes up the stairs. RIVER (annoyed) Yes, I'm functioning. SIMON Mei mei? Were you sleepwalking again? RIVER (shakes her head) The feet didn't move. Only the head. Simon shakes off this latest bit of non-sequitur from his sister and takes her hand. RIVER (CONT'D) It's okay, you know, the thorn is out. SIMON Uh-huh. He leads her away. INT. MODEST HOMESTEAD - DAY Mal shoulders the door open. He and Zoe duck down, expecting gunfire, but there's no sound but a ticking clock. It's tastefully decorated in the latest faux-retro frontier style, with only the odd bit of technology here and there to betray its true vintage. Mal and Zoe stand up, explore the room. ZOE Reid did well for himself. MAL He stayed out of trouble, unlike some of us. Mal starts feeling along the walls, tapping here and there, listening to the sound. ZOE Sir? MAL Sh! ZOE (quieter) Sir, what is it that we're looking for? MAL It's my considered opinion, that folks don't much change, once they's set in their ways. What do you remember about Reid from the unit? ZOE (thinks) Paranoid. MAL And? ZOE A pack rat? Conspiracy theorist? Kook? Geek? MAL My point exactly. Mal finds a sound he likes near the clock. He pulls it aside and opens up an electrical panel. A seam appears in the wallpaper. Mal looks pleased with himself. MAL (CONT'D) Help me. Mal and Zoe pry off the drywall panel. Behind it is a set of concrete stairs leading down. ZOE Survivalist? MAL Even money. They head down the stairs. A SOUND alerts them and they freeze. MAL (CONT'D) Jen dao mei! So soon? ZOE Let's seal this up. They pull the secret door closed behind them. The room is silent and looks undisturbed except for the gap in the dust left by the moved clock and the busted door. The ALLIANCE PATROL moves past the house, searchlights on. A few soldiers step inside, see the door, start looking around. INT. SURVIVALIST SHELTER - DAY Mal and Zoe in the dark stairwell, quiet as mice, waiting. ALLIANCE SOLDIER (OS) There's no-one here. Take what you want then burn the place. SOUNDS of scuffling stomping feet, glass breaking. Mal motions for he and Zoe to go further down the stairs. They come across an ENORMOUS DOOR, like something one would find in a bank vault. It's ajar. With some huffing and grunting, they move it aside, then climb in and pull it closed. Once closed, the wheel spins and there's an electronic PING NOISE, and a red L.E.D. lights up. INT. MODEST HOMESTEAD - DAY The Alliance troops search the place, breaking furniture, lamps, and tearing open paintings. Behind one painting, there's a monitor screen hidden. A Soldier pulls the picture off. In the monitor appears an image of REID, the now dead ex-comrade. REID (on monitor) To whom it may concern. This recording has been triggered by sensors hidden throughout my house and the opening and re sealing of my panic room. I do not take home invasion lightly. You can't miss the "Trespassers will be killed" signs around my property, so you either have no fear of death or are incredibly stupid, or both, in which case, you're probably from the Alliance. (he spits; then cheerful) So, without further delay, I am going to make good on my promises. Goodbye. EXT. MODEST HOMESTEAD - DAY We see the homestead from the air, with the Alliance Ground Transport parked outside, and the quiet, wide open spaces around both. An ATOMIC EXPLOSION detonates, engulfing the home and surrounding fields. END OF ACT TWO ACT THREE INT. BOMB SHELTER - DAY Mal and Zoe pick themselves up off the floor. Some dust has been shaken up and a few things knocked off shelves, but otherwise, they're fine. MAL Goh-se! ZOE Sounded like a pocket nuke. MAL That's our boy. ZOE That means we're buried, sir. MAL We've got the tools to dig us out though. I'll call the ship. Mal pulls out his radio, frowns, punches buttons, mutters, and keeps fiddling with it. Zoe looks at hers, shakes it, throws it away. ZOE N.E.M.P. must have knocked them out. MAL That I did not want to hear. (looks around) Let's see what other gear Reid's packed away. ZOE They'd be dead as ours, sir. MAL Not if he packed 'em right. ZOE Yes, sir. INT. SERENITY'S KITCHEN - NIGHT Kaylee enters. Simon and River are at the table, eating. KAYLEE Morning Simon! Morning River! RIVER (cheerful) Morning irrelevant. No relative time, only lived time. Simon looks at River, shrugs. SIMON You're right, but good morning, anyway, Kaylee. Kaylee smiles. River sits up a little straighter, cocks her head to one side. RIVER Too much interference, can't get a signal through. River gets up to leave. SIMON Mei mei, what is it? RIVER Unnecessary hardware. Runs smoother without. Kaylee and Simon look even more confused than ever. SIMON Uh, sure. River sighs the sigh of putting up with idiots her whole life, rolls her eyes and walks out. RIVER (O.S.) I'm going to look at the stars. Maybe see an eclipse. Kaylee gets her lunch and brings it over. KAYLEE How's she doing? SIMON Comes and goes. She's had moments where she seems peaceful, then the next minute she's more troubled than ever. (shrugs) Maybe her meds need adjusting. I don't know. (beat) Lately, she seems to get tense the moment I walk into a room. KAYLEE Well, you are pretty tense. SIMON I have a lot on my mind. KAYLEE Maybe that's the problem. SIMON What do you mean? Kaylee leans across the table, puts her hand over Simon's. KAYLEE You need to relax. She's very sensitive to people's moods, especially yours. She's just reacting to you being all grumpy and stressed. (beat) Maybe I could help. Simon looks at her. There's a long moment of silence. INT. SERENITY MAIN CORRIDOR - NIGHT River walks briskly forward, her face all purpose, hands on her head. She turns briefly to the left as she passes a junction, then walks on. A moment later, Jayne appears, holding a small, decorative box and walks after her. JAYNE Uh, River? RIVER (O.S.) It's beautiful! Thank you! Jayne looks confused. He stops, looks at the parcel in his hand and looks back to where she's gone. JAYNE (mutters) I ain't even given it to ya yet. INT. COCKPIT - NIGHT Wash is on the radio. River enters behind him and looks nervously out the windows. WASH Damn! I can't even pick up the trace any more! RIVER It's an eclipse. Wash checks the instrument panel. WASH None of the asteroids are blocking our line of sight. RIVER No, there. She points out the window. Wash looks. Out the window in the distance a ship approaches. It's clearly headed straight for Serenity. WASH It's not showing up on the scope. What gives? The ship looms closer. Jayne enters, still holding the parcel. He sees the ship too. RIVER They're coming. WASH Who? Who "they"? Which "they"? JAYNE Who's coming? RIVER Two by two, hands of blue. Recognition slowly dawns on Jayne's face, behind it fear closely follows. WASH What does that mean? And how come we can't see - JAYNE (urgent; stressed) Get us outta here! Get us outta here now! WASH What? Is it Reavers? JAYNE Maybe worse. Just go! Wash calmly flicks the Three Switches and Serenity lights up. EXT. SPACE - NIGHT Serenity pushes away from the asteroid and veers around it as the BLUE SUN SHIP closes on their position. Serenity weaves between the asteroids at breakneck speed. The Blue Sun Ship follows, much more slowly. INT. BLUE SUN SHIP - NIGHT Two BLUE HANDS sit in the cockpit. BLUE HAND ONE stares calmly ahead, his hands on the controls, BLUE HAND TWO has his eyes closed and his hand outstretched, fingers splayed. BLUE HAND ONE (V.O.) He was warned. BLUE HAND TWO (V.O.) Stealth device functions. BLUE HAND ONE (V.O.) It was her. She warns them. They believe. BLUE HAND TWO (V.O.) Then all must be cleansed. BLUE HAND ONE (V.O.) We cannot dock while they flee. BLUE HAND TWO (V.O.) Let them think they escape. Then follow. BLUE HAND ONE (V.O.) Slowing. EXT. SPACE - NIGHT The Blue Sun ship tucks behind an asteroid and fires its retros, coming to a stop. In the distance, Serenity clears the asteroid field and engages its FTL drive, vanishing in a golden wake. The Blue Sun ship fires its rockets to pursue. INT. SERENITY'S COCKPIT - NIGHT Kaylee and Simon arrive on deck. KAYLEE What was all that, Wash? What were you doing with my ship? RIVER How did they find us? KAYLEE What? Who? SIMON Who's here? WASH Could somebody answer in something other than a question, please? Book enters, looking grim, Inara behind him. BOOK Problem? INARA That was some ride. RIVER It's too much to sleep with. JAYNE Doc? Remember when we was on Ariel in the hospital, an' all them people was screaming? SIMON Yeah, I still have nightmares about it. What do you know? RIVER Two by two, hands of blue. Book gets a thoughtful look. INARA What is this all about? JAYNE They're uh, guys with blue hands, and they uh...make your head go - (imitates explosion sound) And they were the ones killed all them people at the hospital. (shrug) Well, maybe not the same two, but.. RIVER The same. Always the same. Simon rubs his forehead. Wash looks wide eyed and silly. WASH It's a contest to who's making the least sense. RIVER It's true. Except the - (imitates explosion) Part. WASH Oh, that's good. RIVER Only massive hemorrhaging. BOOK Where are they now? WASH Well, I think I lost them. RIVER Only slowed down. They never stop. Kaylee sits down. INARA Will someone please explain to me what's going on? BOOK I think I can shed some light on the subject. Everybody looks at Book. JAYNE Say somethin' in the Bible about psychotic assassins? RIVER (correcting) Psionic. BOOK This was just something I heard once, long ago. SIMON We're listening. BOOK When I was... (beat) Before my joining the Order, I had access to information most people don't have. I heard things, about a special training program for assassins who kill without weapons. (beat) When you want to control a state that is spread out as the colonies are, you stop the insurrection before it starts, by eliminating the people starting it. (beat) Now if anyone has any connection to the state visits violence on these insurgents, why they become martyrs and your problem is ten fold. But, if they quietly die in their sleep of an aneurism... SIMON THAT's what they were trying to do to River? BOOK I only know of rumour and conjecture. I didn't know anyone had succeeded yet. JAYNE Well, now we knows they's after us, how do we stop 'em? RIVER Two by two, hands of blue, they come and take your mind from you. JAYNE Huh? RIVER Two against one. JAYNE But there's seven of us. BOOK I think what River is saying is this is a battle we can't win with guns alone. RIVER (turns to Jayne) Do you know how to play leap-frog? INT. BOMB SHELTER - DAY Mal pulls an enormous fancy machine gun out of a crate. It makes Vera look plain. MAL Lookey here! Guns a plenty! ZOE Seems like he was saving up for the next war. MAL Ah well, he never did know when to quit. ZOE Uh-huh. MAL So, how'd you do? ZOE Lots of guns, same as you. A few food supplies, a PortaPower cell which ought to last us a few weeks, and, this - (she holds up a radio) Think we should phone home, sir? MAL Let's hook it up to the cell and see. Zoe plugs the radio into a cube with heat sink fins all over it, turns the radio on. After a moment's static, it crackles to life. ALLIANCE CAPTAIN (on radio) Field Unit 9391, this is Alliance Cruiser Halder, do you copy? Field Unit 9391, this is Alliance Cruiser Halder, do you copy? ZOE (sarcastic) What shall we tell them sir? MAL I guess we wait a bit. INT. SERENITY'S COCKPIT - NIGHT Wash, Jayne and Book pour over an electronic map. WASH Here? BOOK Too heavily populated. JAYNE Here? BOOK Too few. They wouldn't believe we were going there on purpose. WASH What about here? BOOK That'll have to do. WASH We're on our way. Wash turns the ship around. EXT. SPACE - NIGHT Serenity spins around, begins heading off in a new direction with a flare of the engine. INT. SERENITY'S INFIRMARY - NIGHT Simon sorts and packs things, tidies, makes busy, full of nervous energy. Kaylee enters. KAYLEE What'cha doing? SIMON Getting ready, I don't know. I don't really know anything. Everything I knew, my whole world, I left behind and now, I don't know if I can even protect my sister. KAYLEE That's what Jayne is for. River's got a plan. SIMON (scoffs) River's got a plan. River's... Simon laughs an exhausted ironic laugh. KAYLEE What? SIMON She's back to being the smart one and I'm the dummy again. All this time running and looking after her and suddenly she doesn't need me any more. KAYLEE Of course she needs you, silly! You're her brother! I wish I had a brother who'd do as much for me. SIMON Do you have any siblings? KAYLEE Nope, just me and my dad, but even he's not... (beat) Just try to relax. He turns to Kaylee, gestures with his hand. SIMON Easier said than done, with the Boogeymen after us. KAYLEE We've got a head start thanks to Wash's fancy flying, and we got a plan, thanks to (unsure) River. (resumes) Why I wouldn't be surprised if - Simon rushes forward and kisses her. Kaylee loses her balance for a moment. KAYLEE (CONT'D) Lao TYEN yeh! I guess I can be surprised. SIMON Sorry, I shoudln't have - KAYLEE Who says? SIMON This isn't the right time. KAYLEE It's never the right time. So kiss me again, nee mun! He looks into her eyes, brushes away a strand of hair. She smiles up at him. They kiss, slowly and sweetly. INT. INARA'S SHUTTLE - NIGHT Inara's lighting candles. Jayne and River sit cross-legged on the floor across from each other. Jayne looks uncomfortable, River's breathing deeply with her eyes closed. JAYNE This ain't gonna hurt is it? RIVER Answer hazy, ask again later. Jayne puzzles at that. Inara finishes setting the scene. INARA Anything else you need? RIVER Serenity. JAYNE (nods to Inara) I'm okay. Thanks for lettin' us use your shuttle. Inara nods, then turns to leave. RIVER Inara? Inara stops at the doorway. INARA Yes? RIVER He does love you, you know. INARA Who? JAYNE Not me. INARA River? River has her arms in a meditative pose on her lap and hums with her eyes closed. Jayne shrugs, angles his head towards River. RIVER I saw that. INARA Call me if you need anything. Inara leaves. The door closes. RIVER Try not to think of anything. Clear your mind. JAYNE Okay. Jayne concentrates really hard. RIVER Okay, maybe don't try, just don't think. Or think of me. Look at me. Jayne looks at River. She holds her arms up and sways back and forth, smiling. JAYNE Is it working? RIVER Shh! JAYNE Sorry. RIVER Apology not necessary. Just look at me. EE-chee shung-hoo shee. JAYNE You know you're starting to talk more normal every minute. RIVER (sings) Since I've found Serenity. Jayne looks around. JAYNE Huh? RIVER Shut up and look at me. Just focus on me. JAYNE Okay. Jayne looks at her. Really looks at her. We see her from his eyes, all soft, delicate and feminine, the hint of a childlike smile on her lips, her hair flowing out behind her, her skin, her legs folded beneath her, her breasts partly visible through the neck of her shirt. Jayne leans forward to get a better view. River smiles and blushes. RIVER I have never been so beautiful as through your eyes. Thank you. (beat) But that can wait. (beat) I am ready. Close your eyes and relax. JAYNE Okay. Relaxed. Jayne closes his eyes. River reaches forth and puts her hands on his temples. Both partners' eyes snap open at once. RIVER What the gorram Hell? JAYNE Fascinating. Transposition is possible with a willing subject. Must decrease intensity. I was overcompensating. RIVER You see what I see? JAYNE Yes. An' what I see too. RIVER And I see you. And myself through your eyes. JAYNE What's going on? What'd you do? RIVER We are one. Both of them look up and to the left, towards the ceiling. JAYNE They've caught up to us already? RIVER We'll land soon. They want to try and take me alive. We have time. EXT. SPACE - NIGHT Serenity approaches a colony planet. The Blue Sun ship slides into orbit and waits. INT. BLUE SUN SHIP - NIGHT Blue Hand Two types a message in a keypad. Chinese characters appear beside River's face. He presses a button and a flashing red "SENDING" message appears on the screen. BLUE HAND ONE Now we wait. BLUE HAND TWO How many for containment? BLUE HAND ONE Less than one hundred. BLUE HAND TWO They will not be missed. EXT. SPACE - NIGHT The Blue Sun Ship sweeps past. END ACT THREE ACT FOUR INT. BOMB SHELTER - DAY Mal and Zoe keep searching the shelter. MAL You know, I think I've seen enough boxes to last me a lifetime, and me bein' in the shipping trade, that's somethin'. ZOE Hey, what's this? Zoe moves a box aside to reveal metal behind it, seeming out of place in the concrete walls. There are stacks of boxes eight feet tall piled in front of it. MAL Let's see. They start moving the boxes away, revealing another door. It has an electronic keypad lock on it. ZOE Looks like our way out, Sir. MAL Assuming the N.E.M.P. hasn't knocked out the electronics. We might not - Zoe picks up a wrench and smashes the electronic lock to pieces. ZOE Sir? MAL I thought I was the cut through the go-se type. Zoe grabs the jumper cables, disconnects them from the radio and connects them to some wires dangling from the mess that was once a fancy electronic lock. ZOE We're overdue. I need to see my husband again, sir. Mal nods, then gets a thought, and a grin that says perhaps this is something teasable. MAL Never came up before. Why the rush? Zoe gives Mal a threatening look. ZOE It's personal, sir. Mal backs off, hands up. MAL Okay. (points to the door) Let's see about that sunshine. Zoe turns the handle and the door opens. Beyond it is a flatbed just like Serenity's and a long, dark tunnel. Zoe puts her hand on the handlebars. ZOE (smiles) Paranoid like Reid wouldn't seal himself in a box. Of course he'd have an escape route. MAL Then let's saddle up, see where this goes. ZOE What about all this stuff? MAL Pack whatever we can carry in terms of food and water, then fill the rest with anything shiny and expensive-looking. ZOE Gladly, sir. EXT. DESERT - DAY Serenity's hatch opens up. Jayne, Book and River stand in front, Simon, Kaylee and Wash behind them. Jayne is armed for bear, including a machine gun and Vera strapped to his back. Book has a side arm in a holster, but is otherwise dressed in Shepherd garb. River is herself. WASH Okay, kids, don't stay out too late. SIMON I should be with her. Kaylee pats him on the shoulder. KAYLEE Remember the last time you screwed up her plan? You got shot. I think she wants you to stay out of her way this time. JAYNE You just git ready to do some doctorin', just in case. 'Till then, last thing we need is a hostage to worry about. BOOK He also serves who only sits and waits. JAYNE Just be ready. Wash closes the hatch. EXT. WESTERN STREET - DAY Jayne, River and Book walk through the streets. River swings her arms gaily to and fro as she walks, Jayne's hand never strays far from his guns, and Book holds his Bible out in front, almost like a shield. As they do, the townsfolk get one look at them and beat a hasty retreat indoors. JAYNE What's the matter with them? BOOK I expect on this planet, most folks don't walk down the street carrying as many weapons as you are. Jayne sneer-chuckles. The thought of him being intimidating pleases him. RIVER (imitating Jayne) And we gots our own Shepherd for when people git themselves shot. Jayne looks at her. JAYNE Get outta my head, woman. That's just what I was gonna say. RIVER Can't leave till it's over. But it's a nice brain. BOOK Now there's a disturbing thought. Book smiles pleasantly at a woman walking down the street. BOOK Afternoon, ma'am. She flees into an alley. Jayne notices something. JAYNE Hey, there's a saloon. I can get me a quick drink, settle my nerves. RIVER No clouds in the sky, but we could have rain. JAYNE Huh? Yer talking riddles again. RIVER (giggles) I mean, no alcohol, but we can have water. Since we have to wait a while, why not? BOOK You know, River, you are not the same little girl I met this morning. RIVER You can't take the sky from me, since I've found Serenity. She touches Jayne's arm, affectionately. Jayne looks a little weirded out by this, but Book's brain is still catching up. They walk into the saloon. INT. SALOON - DAY There's a large ticking clock on the far wall, an upright piano in one corner - unattended, and a few scattered patrons. As Jayne, River and Book enter, they really scatter, leaving our heroes standing in an empty saloon. JAYNE Damn hospitable. RIVER Better this way. Less interference. BOOK Could we get some water here? [repeats his question in Chinese] The HAND of the BARTENDER hiding behind the bar reaches up, placing three bottles of water, labelled "Earth That Wasser" on the bar. BARTENDER (O.S.) No charge! BOOK Thank you, kindly. They sit down at a table facing the windows, and wait. The clock ticks away. JAYNE Wish it weren't so noisy. We all got watches. The Bartender's hand, holding a small REMOTE CONTROL, reaches up. The clock's ticking is muted. BOOK Hmm. Hologram? BARTENDER (O.S.) The latest rage in the colonies. JAYNE Weren't you fleeing for your life? Git! The Bartender scrambles for the exit. The clock ticks away silently. EXT. DESERT - DAY With the sun high in the sky, the Blue Hands walk from their ship across the desert, determined, cold expressions on their faces. BLUE HAND ONE She's here. BLUE HAND TWO Yes. INT. TUNNEL - DAY Mal rides behind Zoe, holding on for dear life. Zoe guns the engine and lets out a whoop as they accelerate down the tunnel on the flatbed. INT. SALOON - DAY Jayne inspects his guns, again. River meditates, Book reads his Bible. The men look almost bored. River suddenly stands up, eyes fixed ahead. RIVER They's here. Comin' ta git me. EXT. WESTERN STREET - DAY The sun high overhead, the Blue Hands stride purposefully through town. They regard the Saloon. BLUE HAND ONE We are here for the fugitive River Tam. Send her out at once. RIVER (O.S.) Not by the hair on my chinny chin chin! Blue Hand Two pulls out he plastic rod we saw in "Ariel". A high pitched whine shrieks from it. Jayne stumbles out of the saloon, his nose bleeding, and falls to the dirt a few metres from where the Blue Hands stand. They regard him for a moment, then resume their focus on the bar. River pokes her head up to the window. RIVER (CONT'D) No! Stop! I surrender! I surrender! River exits the Saloon. The noise stops. RIVER (CONT'D) I'll come quietly. I don't want any more deaths in my name. With the Bluehands attention on River, Jayne stands up, an eager grin on his blood and sand covered face. RIVER (CONT'D) Any more than the two of you, that is. JAYNE Surprise! They half-turn to Jayne. He fires. Blue Hand One goes down. Blue Hand Two brings the weapon around and concentrates on Jayne as hard as he can. The noise returns. Nothing happens. Jayne lines up his shot. JAYNE (CONT'D) You stay the hell outta my dreams Tyen-sah duh UH-muo! Blue Hand Two falls, a fresh bullet hole in his forehead. RIVER Didn't see that one coming, did you? Book emerges from the bar, Bible in hand. BOOK I wish there had been another way. RIVER They never stop until they've found you. And if someone stops them, another two come to take their place. Two by two. BOOK Well, then, let's hope this worked. Book pulls an electronic device resembling a walkie talkie out of a hollowed out space in his Bible. JAYNE Did you jam 'em? BOOK I'm pretty sure. Standard procedure is to signal on approach and on confirmation of the target. They may have send out a message before they landed, we can't be sure. How are you two holding up? Jayne touches his nose gingerly. JAYNE You hit me real hard, Shepherd. BOOK Sorry, had to look authentic. JAYNE (to River) How're you? RIVER They didn't know where I was coming from. You made an excellent simulrum. JAYNE Hey! I ... (thinks) I know what that means! How do I know what that means? RIVER My hero. She stretches up and kisses him. JAYNE Aw, fay hwa! well... (notices Book watching; old Jayne back) Can I have that ruttin' drink now? EXT. WESTERN STREET - DAY, LATER Jayne and River exit the saloon, arm in arm both a little tipsy. Book follows behind them, watching with curiosity. The bodies of the Blue Hands are gone; from the trails in the dust, they were dragged off somewhere. Mal and Zoe approach on the flatbed. Jayne and River separate, Jayne looks guilty, River regards him with curiosity, then sways. He catches her. They walk down to the street to meet Mal and Zoe as they pull up. Everyone looks surprised to see everyone else. MAL What're you doin' here? JAYNE What are you doin' here? MAL I asked you first. RIVER (imitating Jayne) Settlin' a score. MAL Huh. BOOK How was your meeting with your comrade in arms? MAL Brief. BOOK Parting is such sweet - MAL He's dead. Alliance troops shot him. JAYNE Shouldn't we be gettin' outta this xenophobic-assed planet, then? Zoe looks surprised at Jayne's 50 cent word. MAL Uh, that would be a yes. I take it Serenity is nearby? JAYNE (indicates with a head tilt) That's right. Over yonder. RIVER (to Zoe) Wash misses you. ZOE Well, then, if you'll excuse me, sir, I'll take the fast way home. Mal nods. She hops on the flatbed and zooms away. MAL Well then, let's git. They mosey for a while. People peek from behind curtains, but don't come out. BOOK Folks here are wary of strangers. MAL We noticed when we came. Our buddy Reid's been here since the war. Nobody goes nowhere, strangers are looked upon suspicious-like an' they take a strong dislike to change. Best sort of place for a paranoid type like our dear departed. BOOK I'm sorry for the loss of your friend. MAL Oh, he weren't that much of a friend, but he was generous. He left us a large fortune in small arms. Jayne is interested. JAYNE Any Gauss rifles? MAL A few. We packed up what we could. (beat) Say, how did you all end up landing here when we kept our destination secret an' all? JAYNE Just lucky, I guess. BOOK We have a lot to cover. JAYNE Cover! Shoot! Where's them bodies? What about the ship they came in? An explosion rocks the town. A few stumble, but no-one is hurt. They look off to where it came from. RIVER No trace. No-one must know. Two by two, hands of blue. Down to zero, and it blew. Everyone looks at River. They shrug and resume walking. MAL Well, at least things are back to normal. BOOK Depends on your definition of "normal". END ACT FOUR EPILOGUE INT. JAYNE'S CABIN - NIGHT Jayne's cabin is full of open gun crates. He fondles a large stocky machine gun. There's a knock on the door. JAYNE Yeah? RIVER (O.S.) Can I come in? JAYNE Uh...sure. (beat) Jus' let me clean up. He starts to pack away the guns. RIVER No, it's okay. Show me the shinies. JAYNE You been hangin' around Kaylee? RIVER Yes. (rolls eyes) She's with my brother. (little dance) They're busy "watching the stars go by" in the observation lounge. (blushes; continues in a rush) In the way, too distracting, too personal, don't want to eavesdrop, didn't get far, Wash misses Zoe, Zoe misses Wash, got turned around, Mal and Inara "talking", too much stress. Feeling dizzy. Came here. JAYNE Uh, right. (beat) Well, here's a beauty. He hands her the rifle he was just caressing. She looks on it with the same love and awe he has on his face, almost a reflection. RIVER M41A pulse rifle. Ten millimeter with over-and-under thirty millimeter pump action grenade launcher. Nice. (beat) Heavy though. She holds it up and sights it, handling it like a pro. JAYNE Ah, that don't mean much if you practice enough. He stands behind her, adjusts her weapon's sights. Their hands touch. JAYNE (CONT'D) I mean, uh, you ain't big like me, but most guns these days they don't want much recoil - RIVER On account of the A.G. fields. JAYNE 'Zactly. River puts the rifle gently, respectfully down into its case. She swoons for a moment. We get QUICK FLASHES of the other crew in the middle of their romances. River looks like she's about to fall and Jayne reaches out and steadies her. RIVER You have some nice guns. JAYNE Thanks. She turns to face him touches his chest. RIVER Nice big guns. JAYNE (smiling) It ain't the size, it's the calibre. River looks up at Jayne. RIVER Make love to me? JAYNE (stunned) Uh, sure? She leaps up, wrapping her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck, kissing him. He holds on to her, but stumbles backwards. They land in his bed, River straddling him. She starts pulling his clothes off. RIVER Don't be confused. Or literal. This isn't love, it's need. JAYNE You need me? RIVER Yes. JAYNE Okay. (beat) Why? RIVER Serenity. She kisses him again. EXT. SPACE - NIGHT Another Blue Sun Ship flies through space, going somewhere purposefully. INT. BLUE SUN SHIP - NIGHT Two new BLUE HANDS sit in the cockpit. The computer BEEPS. On a monitor, an image of River appears with some text beside it. It's the message the other team sent before breaking orbit. BLUE HAND ONE They have considerable lead time. BLUE HAND TWO Irrelevant. Acknowledge new orders and begin pursuit. EXT. SPACE - NIGHT The Blue Sun Ship does an abrupt turn to a new heading, fires its main engine and rapidly fades into the distance, blending with the stars. BLACK OUT
TEASER
EXT. SPACE - NIGHT
SERENITY sails silently through the void. A beat to establish and then -
INT. SERENITY MAIN CORRIDOR - NIGHT
MAL and ZOE walk together, headed towards the cockpit.
MAL I know what you're going to say.
ZOE Yes sir.
MAL So say it and let's get it over with.
ZOE Sir, I just don't think we should be going near any core worlds any time soon.
MAL And if the 'verse were on our side, we wouldn't have to. But you heard Kaylee -
ZOE Yes sir, I did. She said that fuzzbuster we got from Reid could give us an extra hour's warning of an approaching Alliance ship.
MAL That hour could make the difference between a successful salvage and prison. But we need a yu bun duh adaptor to hook it up to our very old, but nonetheless functional comm system.
ZOE Does it make sense, if what we're trying to achieve is less trouble from the Alliance to head straight into Alliance territory?
MAL One quick trip, that's all. If it works, we'll -
Mal pauses. They're standing right in front of Jayne's cabin. The faint sounds of lovemaking coming from within.
ZOE Sir?
Mal holds his finger up to his lips to shush Zoe.
MAL Now that's something we don't hear every day.
From inside the room, JAYNE moans in pleasure. A female voice giggles.
ZOE That's something I'd hoped never to hear.
MAL goes to knock.
ZOE (CONT'D) Sir? Should we interrupt such a special private moment?
MAL Damn straight.
MAL knocks.
MAL (CONT'D) Jayne! I don't recall approving any passengers, she paying her way?
The noises from within stop. The girl giggles again. SIMON walks up behind Mal and Zoe.
SIMON Captain, I have some concerns about this trip to Euterpe. River was acting really -
MAL 'Scuse me a moment, Doctor, I have a little matter of shipboard security and discipline to attend to.
ZOE The captain wouldn't do anything to put all our lives in danger, Doctor. Would he, sir?
Mal knocks a little louder.
MAL Jayne, get decent - (sigh) Get yourself and your little friend there as decent as you can, I'm coming in.
SIMON Has anyone... (beat) Seen River recently? She's not in her room.
Zoe gets a startled look, which turns to horror as she figures it out.
ZOE Um, sir?
She taps Mal on the shoulder. Mal busts the door open.
INT. JAYNE'S CABIN - NIGHT
JAYNE's in his bed, naked except for what the blanket covers. RIVER pokes her head out, looking a little awkward as Simon stares, his mouth moving like a fish gasping for air as his brain struggles to keep up.
MAL (mutters) Shun-SHENG duh gao-WAHN!
ZOE Yes, sir.
Simon finds his voice.
SIMON Son of a bitch!
END TEASER
ACT ONE
INT. JAYNE'S CABIN - NIGHT, MOMENTS LATER
Right where we left off. Simon's non-violent personality wars with his need to hit someone or something.
MAL Uh, Jayne?
JAYNE Mal, I can explain!
ZOE I'd rather you didn't.
RIVER (holds hands to her ears) Too much yelling!
MAL Nobody's yelling.
MAL Well, almost nobody.
SIMON Mei mei, why?
RIVER There were no storms here. Now it's windy again. I liked the sky clear.
Zoe raises an eyebrow.
JAYNE River an' me, we...came to an understanding.
MAL I'm trying real hard, but I'm not with the understanding part. Neither, it seems, is the good Doctor. However, let's discuss this somewhere's with more room an' more clothes.
He nods to Zoe, they leave.
RIVER It's not chemistry!
TITLE CARD: One Week Ago...
Jayne tosses and turns in the midst of a nightmare.
RIVER (V.O.) And also? I can kill you with my brain.
SIMON (V.O.) That's a scalpel scar. They... they opened up her skull and they cut into her brain.
RIVER (V.O.) Christmas didn't come.
SIMON (V.O.) While you are on this table...
JAYNE (V.O.) It's a girl. She's cute, too, but I don't think she's all there, y'know?
SIMON (V.O.) She feels everything; she can't not.
JAYNE (V.O.) What's wrong with my 'pine?
RIVER (V.O.) It's not what it appears.
JAYNE (V.O.) The money was too much.
JAYNE (V.O.) I don't much like someone being able to hear my thoughts.
Jayne wakes up, bathed in sweat. River stands beside the bed with a sympathetic expression on her face.
JAYNE What're you doing here?
RIVER Two by two, hands of blue.
JAYNE What?
Two BLUE HANDS stand behind River, holding the plastic bar. A high pitched whine begins. Jayne's nose starts bleeding and he winces in pain. He reaches for his gun rack, grabs Vera, turns and - WAKES UP. River and the others are gone.
JAYNE (CONT'D) KWAI chur hun-rien duh di fahng! Keep away from me!
He turns, River sits next to him on the bed. She strokes his shoulder sympathetically.
RIVER Welcome to my nightmare. I really hope you like it.
JAYNE No.
RIVER I wasn't born a killer. I was conscripted. They've got to keep the house from falling down, all those faces and numbers but the centre will not hold.
She turns to leave. The back of her head is missing, exposing her brain. Multicoloured wires poke out and connect one lobe to another.
RIVER (CONT'D) Got to go now. More tests to run.
JAYNE WAKES UP, rubs his face with his hands. He looks around the room, peeking between his fingers.
JAYNE Ay ya!
Serenity is attached to the side of an asteroid. An ALLIANCE CRUISER passes by in the b.g.
INT. SERENITY'S COCKPIT - NIGHT
WASH leans back in his chair, feed up on the control panel, watching the monitor as the Cruiser passes by. Jayne enters.
JAYNE Any sign of Zoe an' Mal? Wash startles.
WASH Could you be a little less stalky? (beat) No, they haven't signalled yet. Of course with Charlie out there - (indicates the cruiser) They're probably not going to say much over the radio.
JAYNE How 'bout Inara?
WASH Not due until morning. (beat) Say, I'll bet Book would love to lift weights with you, why don't you go ask him?
Wash looks eager to get Jayne out of his sanctum as soon as possible. Jayne shrugs, walks away.
JAYNE Nah. He's sleepin', lucky hwoon dahn!
Jayne shuffles away. Wash looks relieved. A moment or two later, and he brings out two hand puppets.
WASH (puppet voice) And now my dear, would you like a cup of tea?
INT. SERENITY'S KITCHEN - NIGHT
Jayne walks in, sees River sitting there, drink in hand.
JAYNE Uh, never mind. He turns to go.
RIVER Sorry I dragged you along.
Jayne stops, turns.
RIVER It's too late. Can't wash hands of it now. They don't like dirt they can't clean.
JAYNE You know, in a crazy-assed way, you're starting to make sense. (beat) I need a drink.
RIVER Here, helps keep the whispers from tickling.
She hands him a flask. Jayne sniffs it, then looks pleased with the smell.
JAYNE Say, this is -
RIVER (in cockney accent) 'Ee sometimes uses it when gold don't shine so good. Eye pinched it from his ol' elephant and kettle.
Jayne takes a drink.
JAYNE Sounds like Badger. You steal it from him?
River nods.
RIVER You have a question?
Jayne takes a long drink, then a long breath.
JAYNE Them blue hands guys...
RIVER Got to keep the loonies on the path.
JAYNE When we was on Ariel...
RIVER Shh! It's a secret.
JAYNE They was what killed those men?
RIVER With their brains.
Jayne stops and takes this in. Being Jayne, it takes a while.
JAYNE So what do they want?
RIVER Sweep under the rug, the dirt gathers there. Pretend it doesn't exist. It thinks it knows what's happening, but it doesn't.
Jayne's heard enough.
JAYNE Thanks for the drink.
Jayne gets up to go. River touches his arm gently.
RIVER Stay. Ocean's quiet enough you can see the bottom. I want to listen.
JAYNE Huh?
RIVER Sing me your song.
JAYNE What? You mean - (sings ballad of Jayne) Our love for him ain't hard to explain...
River brightens.
RIVER Sing me all your songs. I want to hear them.
JAYNE I only got the one.
INT. SERENITY'S ENGINE ROOM - NIGHT
Kaylee wakes up in her hammock, stretches and yawns. She stumbles out of it, pats her engine affectionately and stumbles down the hall.
Kaylee walks over to the coffee machine and starts it, yawning heavily It produces two cups and she takes both, walking back the way she came.
The flask remains on the table. She frowns at it as she walks by but doesn't bother investigating.
Behind her, in the b.g., Jayne and River are asleep on the couch.
INARA'S SHUTTLE comes in for a landing. The platform retracts and snaps into place.
INT. DOCKING BAY - DAY
BOOK greets INARA as she disembarks.
INARA Hello, Shephard. I didn't expect a formal welcoming committee.
BOOK I have few responsibilities on this ship, I thought I might add to them, even unofficially. How was your trip?
INARA My client was inoffensive but dull. How is your flock?
BOOK Mostly still asleep. We've been laying low, and with Mal and Zoe gone, things have been surprisingly quiet.
INARA I would've thought you would have your hands full, managing Jayne and the Tams.
BOOK The Lord works in mysterious ways. I'm afraid He's got me this time.
Kaylee walks up. She sees Inara and smiles.
KAYLEE Hey, Inara! Have good sex?
INARA Nothing exceptional.
KAYLEE Maybe next time. (to Book) Morning, Shepherd.
BOOK Morning, Kaylee. Are we moving yet?
KAYLEE Nope, I'd know it if we were. I'm just on my way to bug Wash.
BOOK So, no sign of Mal or Zoe?
KAYLEE Aw, you know them when they're with old war buddies.
EXT. DESERT - DAY
Mal and Zoe kneel with their hands on their heads. Behind them are a row of Alliance troops. Beside them on the ground is the BODY of a man Mal's age, with red-stained sand near where his head came to rest.
MAL Not quite the reunion I expected.
An ALLIANCE SOLDIER cuffs Mal across the jaw. Mal spits blood.
MAL (CONT'D) I wasn't talking to you, I was solliloquizing.
He hits Mal again.
ALLIANCE SOLDIER Be quiet. (to radio) Alliance Cruiser Halder, this is Field Unit 9391, requesting immmediate dust off. We have two prisoners in custody, over. The radio blurts static.
MAL Don't make 'em like they used to, do they?
ALLIANCE SOLDIER (to the other troops) All right. We have temporarily lost contact with the ship. We'll hold position and set up base camp until contact is restored and we get further orders. Secure the prisoners.
MAL I already feel secure.
The soldier hits him again. Zoe gives Mal a look, as if to say, "Stop getting yourself beat up," but remains silent. The soldiers break formation and begin setting up their camp. One places cuffs on Mal and Zoe, then leaves them to join the others.
MAL (CONT'D) (shouting after them) I'm a might thirsty, do you think you could rustle up a canteen?
They ignore him.
ZOE (hushed tones) Sir, is it wise to provoke them?
MAL You think this is just me bein' a stubborn, disrespectful cuss? Takin' out my resentment against the Alliance on my own pretty face?
ZOE The thought did occurr to me, sir. (beat) Although Unification Day is still three months away.
MAL Well, as a matter of fact, I was merely providing a distraction.
ZOE To what purpose, Sir? Lull them into a false sense of superiority? They already have that.
MAL Oh, ye of little faith.
Mal twists his back so Zoe can see his hands. He's palmed the pass card key to their cuffs.
ZOE It's been an honour serving with you, Sir.
Mal releases his cuffs with the pass card, then Zoe's. They watch the Alliance troops assembling their field shelters,wait for a moment when they're all distracted, then run for it. One does notice and draws his weapon to fire.
END ACT ONE ACT TWO
INT. INARA'S SHUTTLE - NIGHT
Inara gets up as someone enters.
INARA Look, Mal, I -
She sees Jayne come in.
JAYNE Ain't Mal.
INARA Jayne? What do you want?
JAYNE I want to buy a present for somebody.
INARA (crossing arms) I'm not someone's present.
JAYNE No! No. I don't mean sex, I - (beat) I want to buy a present for someone, a girl, and I need your advice on account of -
INARA I'm a girl?
JAYNE Yeah, and uh, I want to buy her something nice, you know, girl stuff.
INARA What's the occasion, dare I ask?
INARA What's the intent of the present? What do you want out of it?
JAYNE (shrugs) I dunno, make her happy, I guess. (thinks; snaps finger) Oh! Friends! I want us to be friends.
Inara needs to sit down.
INARA So, this is a present for a girl -
JAYNE Yep.
INARA Who you want to be friends with.
JAYNE Yeah...
INARA And nothing else?
JAYNE (thinks hard) Well... (beat) I guess, I don't know, sure. It don't really matter though.
INARA Who IS she?
JAYNE Do I have to say?
INARA I'm just...in awe, that's all. Whoever she is, she must be pretty special.
JAYNE (chuckles) Yeah, you could say that.
INARA How soon will you see her again?
JAYNE I dunno, soon. Maybe tonight.
INARA But we're - She's on the ship?
JAYNE Yeah, it's River, if you gotta know.
INARA I'm sorry. What?
JAYNE We're, I dunno, comin' to an understandin'.
INARA I'm glad somebody has.
JAYNE Pardon?
INARA I think I need to lie down for a while, could you come back later?
JAYNE Uh, sure.
Jayne gets up and leaves. Inara reaches over and douses her incense.
INT. COCKPIT - NIGHT
Kaylee offers a cup of coffee to Wash.
WASH Oh, thanks, but no thanks. I never drink coffee when I'm flying, or about to fly at any minute. Gets me nervous.
KAYLEE But you're never nervous when you fly.
WASH Exactly.
KAYLEE So you're sayin' if you had a cup, you'd be a jittery wreck?
WASH And shortly thereafter, so would Serenity.
KAYLEE Perish the thought.
Kaylee looks out at the stars. Wash taps an instrument panel that's flickering.
WASH So how's your end?
KAYLEE Pardon?
WASH Of the ship.
KAYLEE The synchronizers we picked up on Ariel make a funny noise now and then. Other than that, no complaints. She pretty much purrs and hisses right when I expect.
WASH (nods) Hmm.
Kaylee pats him on the shoulder.
KAYLEE Don't worry. Mal and Zoe always come back. That's why they're Mal and Zoe.
WASH I know. We've done this hundreds of times together, but, I don't know, somehow, it's...different.
KAYLEE Why?
WASH Because it's not just Mal and Zoe any more. It's Mal and The Future Mother of My Child.
Kaylee squeaks.
KAYLEE Oh my God! Zoe's pregnant? This is incredible!
Kaylee looks like she's vibrating in place she's so excited. Wash makes shushing gestures with his hands, looking nervous.
WASH Well, no. Not, yet, really.
KAYLEE Huh?
WASH Zoe and I had a long talk after our encounter on Hera. (beat) You see, before I never thought it was such a good time in our lives to be even thinking about raising a family, you know, but well, you know Zoe. We talked, and talked, and she (gulps) ...persuaded me and ...threatened a little. (looks wistful) After a while, I started to like the idea. A little version of me and Zoe running around. So, we've been thinking about it. (shrugs) And practicing, you know. We want to get it right. (blushes) And I am going to get in all kinds of danger for blabbing this much, so keep it quiet, dong-ma?
Kaylee makes an X across her chest.
KAYLEE Cross my heart. I promise.
She pats him on the shoulder again. Kaylee looks, smiling, up at the stars. Wash checks another instrument panel, in an absent-minded worried kind of way.
KAYLEE (CONT'D) So have you thought of any names yet?
Wash bangs his forehead on the console repeatedly.
INT. TAM CABIN - NIGHT
Simon wakes up slowly, stretches and yawns.
SIMON How did you sleep?
He turns around. River isn't in the cabin. He rubs his forehead.
SIMON (CONT'D) TYEN shiao-duh!
He gets up, grabs the nearest shirt and throws it on.
SIMON (CONT'D) River?
INT. SERENITY'S CARGO HOLD - NIGHT
Simon rushes to and fro, searching. Book walks along the catwalk above.
SIMON River?
BOOK I thought I saw her in the observation lounge.
SIMON Oh, of course. She likes looking at the stars. Thank you, Shephard Book.
Simon climbs the stairs to the catwalk.
BOOK (quietly smiling) "And the rock cried out, no hiding place from The Lord."
SIMON Yes, of course, thank you.
BOOK You're welcome. Just keeping the flock together.
INT. SERENITY'S OBSERVATION LOUNGE - NIGHT
River sways to and fro as if she was a willow tree in a gentle breeze, smiling, eyes closed. She frowns and stops seconds before Simon rushes up the stairs.
RIVER (annoyed) Yes, I'm functioning.
SIMON Mei mei? Were you sleepwalking again?
RIVER (shakes her head) The feet didn't move. Only the head.
Simon shakes off this latest bit of non-sequitur from his sister and takes her hand.
RIVER (CONT'D) It's okay, you know, the thorn is out.
SIMON Uh-huh.
He leads her away.
INT. MODEST HOMESTEAD - DAY
Mal shoulders the door open. He and Zoe duck down, expecting gunfire, but there's no sound but a ticking clock. It's tastefully decorated in the latest faux-retro frontier style, with only the odd bit of technology here and there to betray its true vintage. Mal and Zoe stand up, explore the room.
ZOE Reid did well for himself.
MAL He stayed out of trouble, unlike some of us.
Mal starts feeling along the walls, tapping here and there, listening to the sound.
MAL Sh!
ZOE (quieter) Sir, what is it that we're looking for?
MAL It's my considered opinion, that folks don't much change, once they's set in their ways. What do you remember about Reid from the unit?
ZOE (thinks) Paranoid.
MAL And?
ZOE A pack rat? Conspiracy theorist? Kook? Geek?
MAL My point exactly.
Mal finds a sound he likes near the clock. He pulls it aside and opens up an electrical panel. A seam appears in the wallpaper. Mal looks pleased with himself.
MAL (CONT'D) Help me.
Mal and Zoe pry off the drywall panel. Behind it is a set of concrete stairs leading down.
ZOE Survivalist?
MAL Even money.
They head down the stairs. A SOUND alerts them and they freeze.
MAL (CONT'D) Jen dao mei! So soon?
ZOE Let's seal this up.
They pull the secret door closed behind them. The room is silent and looks undisturbed except for the gap in the dust left by the moved clock and the busted door. The ALLIANCE PATROL moves past the house, searchlights on. A few soldiers step inside, see the door, start looking around.
INT. SURVIVALIST SHELTER - DAY
Mal and Zoe in the dark stairwell, quiet as mice, waiting.
ALLIANCE SOLDIER (OS) There's no-one here. Take what you want then burn the place.
SOUNDS of scuffling stomping feet, glass breaking. Mal motions for he and Zoe to go further down the stairs.
They come across an ENORMOUS DOOR, like something one would find in a bank vault. It's ajar. With some huffing and grunting, they move it aside, then climb in and pull it closed.
Once closed, the wheel spins and there's an electronic PING NOISE, and a red L.E.D. lights up.
The Alliance troops search the place, breaking furniture, lamps, and tearing open paintings.
Behind one painting, there's a monitor screen hidden. A Soldier pulls the picture off. In the monitor appears an image of REID, the now dead ex-comrade.
REID (on monitor) To whom it may concern. This recording has been triggered by sensors hidden throughout my house and the opening and re sealing of my panic room. I do not take home invasion lightly. You can't miss the "Trespassers will be killed" signs around my property, so you either have no fear of death or are incredibly stupid, or both, in which case, you're probably from the Alliance. (he spits; then cheerful) So, without further delay, I am going to make good on my promises. Goodbye.
EXT. MODEST HOMESTEAD - DAY
We see the homestead from the air, with the Alliance Ground Transport parked outside, and the quiet, wide open spaces around both.
An ATOMIC EXPLOSION detonates, engulfing the home and surrounding fields.
END OF ACT TWO ACT THREE
INT. BOMB SHELTER - DAY
Mal and Zoe pick themselves up off the floor. Some dust has been shaken up and a few things knocked off shelves, but otherwise, they're fine.
MAL Goh-se!
ZOE Sounded like a pocket nuke.
MAL That's our boy.
ZOE That means we're buried, sir.
MAL We've got the tools to dig us out though. I'll call the ship.
Mal pulls out his radio, frowns, punches buttons, mutters, and keeps fiddling with it. Zoe looks at hers, shakes it, throws it away.
ZOE N.E.M.P. must have knocked them out.
MAL That I did not want to hear. (looks around) Let's see what other gear Reid's packed away.
ZOE They'd be dead as ours, sir.
MAL Not if he packed 'em right.
Kaylee enters. Simon and River are at the table, eating.
KAYLEE Morning Simon! Morning River!
RIVER (cheerful) Morning irrelevant. No relative time, only lived time.
Simon looks at River, shrugs.
SIMON You're right, but good morning, anyway, Kaylee.
Kaylee smiles. River sits up a little straighter, cocks her head to one side.
RIVER Too much interference, can't get a signal through.
River gets up to leave.
SIMON Mei mei, what is it?
RIVER Unnecessary hardware. Runs smoother without.
Kaylee and Simon look even more confused than ever.
SIMON Uh, sure.
River sighs the sigh of putting up with idiots her whole life, rolls her eyes and walks out.
RIVER (O.S.) I'm going to look at the stars. Maybe see an eclipse.
Kaylee gets her lunch and brings it over.
KAYLEE How's she doing?
SIMON Comes and goes. She's had moments where she seems peaceful, then the next minute she's more troubled than ever. (shrugs) Maybe her meds need adjusting. I don't know. (beat) Lately, she seems to get tense the moment I walk into a room.
KAYLEE Well, you are pretty tense.
SIMON I have a lot on my mind.
KAYLEE Maybe that's the problem.
SIMON What do you mean?
Kaylee leans across the table, puts her hand over Simon's.
KAYLEE You need to relax. She's very sensitive to people's moods, especially yours. She's just reacting to you being all grumpy and stressed. (beat) Maybe I could help.
Simon looks at her. There's a long moment of silence.
River walks briskly forward, her face all purpose, hands on her head. She turns briefly to the left as she passes a junction, then walks on.
A moment later, Jayne appears, holding a small, decorative box and walks after her.
JAYNE Uh, River?
RIVER (O.S.) It's beautiful! Thank you!
Jayne looks confused. He stops, looks at the parcel in his hand and looks back to where she's gone.
JAYNE (mutters) I ain't even given it to ya yet.
Wash is on the radio. River enters behind him and looks nervously out the windows.
WASH Damn! I can't even pick up the trace any more!
RIVER It's an eclipse.
Wash checks the instrument panel.
WASH None of the asteroids are blocking our line of sight.
RIVER No, there.
She points out the window. Wash looks.
Out the window in the distance a ship approaches. It's clearly headed straight for Serenity.
WASH It's not showing up on the scope. What gives?
The ship looms closer. Jayne enters, still holding the parcel. He sees the ship too.
RIVER They're coming.
WASH Who? Who "they"? Which "they"?
JAYNE Who's coming?
Recognition slowly dawns on Jayne's face, behind it fear closely follows.
WASH What does that mean? And how come we can't see -
JAYNE (urgent; stressed) Get us outta here! Get us outta here now!
WASH What? Is it Reavers?
JAYNE Maybe worse. Just go!
Wash calmly flicks the Three Switches and Serenity lights up.
Serenity pushes away from the asteroid and veers around it as the BLUE SUN SHIP closes on their position.
Serenity weaves between the asteroids at breakneck speed. The Blue Sun Ship follows, much more slowly.
INT. BLUE SUN SHIP - NIGHT
Two BLUE HANDS sit in the cockpit. BLUE HAND ONE stares calmly ahead, his hands on the controls, BLUE HAND TWO has his eyes closed and his hand outstretched, fingers splayed.
BLUE HAND ONE (V.O.) He was warned.
BLUE HAND TWO (V.O.) Stealth device functions.
BLUE HAND ONE (V.O.) It was her. She warns them. They believe.
BLUE HAND TWO (V.O.) Then all must be cleansed.
BLUE HAND ONE (V.O.) We cannot dock while they flee.
BLUE HAND TWO (V.O.) Let them think they escape. Then follow.
BLUE HAND ONE (V.O.) Slowing.
The Blue Sun ship tucks behind an asteroid and fires its retros, coming to a stop.
In the distance, Serenity clears the asteroid field and engages its FTL drive, vanishing in a golden wake.
The Blue Sun ship fires its rockets to pursue.
Kaylee and Simon arrive on deck.
KAYLEE What was all that, Wash? What were you doing with my ship?
RIVER How did they find us?
KAYLEE What? Who?
SIMON Who's here?
WASH Could somebody answer in something other than a question, please?
Book enters, looking grim, Inara behind him.
BOOK Problem?
INARA That was some ride.
RIVER It's too much to sleep with.
JAYNE Doc? Remember when we was on Ariel in the hospital, an' all them people was screaming?
SIMON Yeah, I still have nightmares about it. What do you know?
Book gets a thoughtful look.
INARA What is this all about?
JAYNE They're uh, guys with blue hands, and they uh...make your head go - (imitates explosion sound) And they were the ones killed all them people at the hospital. (shrug) Well, maybe not the same two, but..
RIVER The same. Always the same.
Simon rubs his forehead. Wash looks wide eyed and silly.
WASH It's a contest to who's making the least sense.
RIVER It's true. Except the - (imitates explosion) Part.
WASH Oh, that's good.
RIVER Only massive hemorrhaging.
BOOK Where are they now?
WASH Well, I think I lost them.
RIVER Only slowed down. They never stop.
Kaylee sits down.
INARA Will someone please explain to me what's going on?
BOOK I think I can shed some light on the subject.
Everybody looks at Book.
JAYNE Say somethin' in the Bible about psychotic assassins?
RIVER (correcting) Psionic.
BOOK This was just something I heard once, long ago.
SIMON We're listening.
BOOK When I was... (beat) Before my joining the Order, I had access to information most people don't have. I heard things, about a special training program for assassins who kill without weapons. (beat) When you want to control a state that is spread out as the colonies are, you stop the insurrection before it starts, by eliminating the people starting it. (beat) Now if anyone has any connection to the state visits violence on these insurgents, why they become martyrs and your problem is ten fold. But, if they quietly die in their sleep of an aneurism...
SIMON THAT's what they were trying to do to River?
BOOK I only know of rumour and conjecture. I didn't know anyone had succeeded yet.
JAYNE Well, now we knows they's after us, how do we stop 'em?
RIVER Two by two, hands of blue, they come and take your mind from you.
RIVER Two against one.
JAYNE But there's seven of us.
BOOK I think what River is saying is this is a battle we can't win with guns alone.
RIVER (turns to Jayne) Do you know how to play leap-frog?
Mal pulls an enormous fancy machine gun out of a crate. It makes Vera look plain.
MAL Lookey here! Guns a plenty!
ZOE Seems like he was saving up for the next war.
MAL Ah well, he never did know when to quit.
ZOE Uh-huh.
MAL So, how'd you do?
ZOE Lots of guns, same as you. A few food supplies, a PortaPower cell which ought to last us a few weeks, and, this - (she holds up a radio) Think we should phone home, sir?
MAL Let's hook it up to the cell and see.
Zoe plugs the radio into a cube with heat sink fins all over it, turns the radio on. After a moment's static, it crackles to life.
ALLIANCE CAPTAIN (on radio) Field Unit 9391, this is Alliance Cruiser Halder, do you copy? Field Unit 9391, this is Alliance Cruiser Halder, do you copy?
ZOE (sarcastic) What shall we tell them sir?
MAL I guess we wait a bit.
Wash, Jayne and Book pour over an electronic map.
WASH Here?
BOOK Too heavily populated.
JAYNE Here?
BOOK Too few. They wouldn't believe we were going there on purpose.
WASH What about here?
BOOK That'll have to do.
WASH We're on our way.
Wash turns the ship around.
Serenity spins around, begins heading off in a new direction with a flare of the engine.
INT. SERENITY'S INFIRMARY - NIGHT
Simon sorts and packs things, tidies, makes busy, full of nervous energy. Kaylee enters.
KAYLEE What'cha doing?
SIMON Getting ready, I don't know. I don't really know anything. Everything I knew, my whole world, I left behind and now, I don't know if I can even protect my sister.
KAYLEE That's what Jayne is for. River's got a plan.
SIMON (scoffs) River's got a plan. River's...
Simon laughs an exhausted ironic laugh.
KAYLEE What?
SIMON She's back to being the smart one and I'm the dummy again. All this time running and looking after her and suddenly she doesn't need me any more.
KAYLEE Of course she needs you, silly! You're her brother! I wish I had a brother who'd do as much for me.
SIMON Do you have any siblings?
KAYLEE Nope, just me and my dad, but even he's not... (beat) Just try to relax.
He turns to Kaylee, gestures with his hand.
SIMON Easier said than done, with the Boogeymen after us.
KAYLEE We've got a head start thanks to Wash's fancy flying, and we got a plan, thanks to (unsure) River. (resumes) Why I wouldn't be surprised if -
Simon rushes forward and kisses her. Kaylee loses her balance for a moment.
KAYLEE (CONT'D) Lao TYEN yeh! I guess I can be surprised.
SIMON Sorry, I shoudln't have -
KAYLEE Who says?
SIMON This isn't the right time.
KAYLEE It's never the right time. So kiss me again, nee mun!
He looks into her eyes, brushes away a strand of hair. She smiles up at him. They kiss, slowly and sweetly.
Inara's lighting candles. Jayne and River sit cross-legged on the floor across from each other. Jayne looks uncomfortable, River's breathing deeply with her eyes closed.
JAYNE This ain't gonna hurt is it?
RIVER Answer hazy, ask again later.
Jayne puzzles at that. Inara finishes setting the scene.
INARA Anything else you need?
RIVER Serenity.
JAYNE (nods to Inara) I'm okay. Thanks for lettin' us use your shuttle.
Inara nods, then turns to leave.
RIVER Inara?
Inara stops at the doorway.
INARA Yes?
RIVER He does love you, you know.
INARA Who?
JAYNE Not me.
INARA River?
River has her arms in a meditative pose on her lap and hums with her eyes closed. Jayne shrugs, angles his head towards River.
RIVER I saw that.
INARA Call me if you need anything.
Inara leaves. The door closes.
RIVER Try not to think of anything. Clear your mind.
JAYNE Okay.
Jayne concentrates really hard.
RIVER Okay, maybe don't try, just don't think. Or think of me. Look at me.
Jayne looks at River. She holds her arms up and sways back and forth, smiling.
JAYNE Is it working?
RIVER Shh!
JAYNE Sorry.
RIVER Apology not necessary. Just look at me. EE-chee shung-hoo shee.
JAYNE You know you're starting to talk more normal every minute.
RIVER (sings) Since I've found Serenity.
Jayne looks around.
RIVER Shut up and look at me. Just focus on me.
Jayne looks at her. Really looks at her.
We see her from his eyes, all soft, delicate and feminine, the hint of a childlike smile on her lips, her hair flowing out behind her, her skin, her legs folded beneath her, her breasts partly visible through the neck of her shirt.
Jayne leans forward to get a better view. River smiles and blushes.
RIVER I have never been so beautiful as through your eyes. Thank you. (beat) But that can wait. (beat) I am ready. Close your eyes and relax.
JAYNE Okay. Relaxed.
Jayne closes his eyes. River reaches forth and puts her hands on his temples.
Both partners' eyes snap open at once.
RIVER What the gorram Hell?
JAYNE Fascinating. Transposition is possible with a willing subject. Must decrease intensity. I was overcompensating.
RIVER You see what I see?
JAYNE Yes. An' what I see too.
RIVER And I see you. And myself through your eyes.
JAYNE What's going on? What'd you do?
RIVER We are one.
Both of them look up and to the left, towards the ceiling.
JAYNE They've caught up to us already?
RIVER We'll land soon. They want to try and take me alive. We have time.
Serenity approaches a colony planet. The Blue Sun ship slides into orbit and waits.
Blue Hand Two types a message in a keypad. Chinese characters appear beside River's face. He presses a button and a flashing red "SENDING" message appears on the screen.
BLUE HAND ONE Now we wait.
BLUE HAND TWO How many for containment?
BLUE HAND ONE Less than one hundred.
BLUE HAND TWO They will not be missed.
The Blue Sun Ship sweeps past.
END ACT THREE ACT FOUR
Mal and Zoe keep searching the shelter.
MAL You know, I think I've seen enough boxes to last me a lifetime, and me bein' in the shipping trade, that's somethin'.
ZOE Hey, what's this?
Zoe moves a box aside to reveal metal behind it, seeming out of place in the concrete walls. There are stacks of boxes eight feet tall piled in front of it.
MAL Let's see.
They start moving the boxes away, revealing another door. It has an electronic keypad lock on it.
ZOE Looks like our way out, Sir.
MAL Assuming the N.E.M.P. hasn't knocked out the electronics. We might not -
Zoe picks up a wrench and smashes the electronic lock to pieces.
MAL I thought I was the cut through the go-se type.
Zoe grabs the jumper cables, disconnects them from the radio and connects them to some wires dangling from the mess that was once a fancy electronic lock.
ZOE We're overdue. I need to see my husband again, sir.
Mal nods, then gets a thought, and a grin that says perhaps this is something teasable.
MAL Never came up before. Why the rush?
Zoe gives Mal a threatening look.
ZOE It's personal, sir.
Mal backs off, hands up.
MAL Okay. (points to the door) Let's see about that sunshine.
Zoe turns the handle and the door opens. Beyond it is a flatbed just like Serenity's and a long, dark tunnel. Zoe puts her hand on the handlebars.
ZOE (smiles) Paranoid like Reid wouldn't seal himself in a box. Of course he'd have an escape route.
MAL Then let's saddle up, see where this goes.
ZOE What about all this stuff?
MAL Pack whatever we can carry in terms of food and water, then fill the rest with anything shiny and expensive-looking.
ZOE Gladly, sir.
Serenity's hatch opens up.
Jayne, Book and River stand in front, Simon, Kaylee and Wash behind them.
Jayne is armed for bear, including a machine gun and Vera strapped to his back. Book has a side arm in a holster, but is otherwise dressed in Shepherd garb. River is herself.
WASH Okay, kids, don't stay out too late.
SIMON I should be with her.
KAYLEE Remember the last time you screwed up her plan? You got shot. I think she wants you to stay out of her way this time.
JAYNE You just git ready to do some doctorin', just in case. 'Till then, last thing we need is a hostage to worry about.
BOOK He also serves who only sits and waits.
JAYNE Just be ready.
Wash closes the hatch.
EXT. WESTERN STREET - DAY
Jayne, River and Book walk through the streets.
River swings her arms gaily to and fro as she walks, Jayne's hand never strays far from his guns, and Book holds his Bible out in front, almost like a shield.
As they do, the townsfolk get one look at them and beat a hasty retreat indoors.
JAYNE What's the matter with them?
BOOK I expect on this planet, most folks don't walk down the street carrying as many weapons as you are.
Jayne sneer-chuckles. The thought of him being intimidating pleases him.
RIVER (imitating Jayne) And we gots our own Shepherd for when people git themselves shot.
Jayne looks at her.
JAYNE Get outta my head, woman. That's just what I was gonna say.
RIVER Can't leave till it's over. But it's a nice brain.
BOOK Now there's a disturbing thought.
Book smiles pleasantly at a woman walking down the street.
BOOK Afternoon, ma'am.
She flees into an alley. Jayne notices something.
JAYNE Hey, there's a saloon. I can get me a quick drink, settle my nerves.
RIVER No clouds in the sky, but we could have rain.
JAYNE Huh? Yer talking riddles again.
RIVER (giggles) I mean, no alcohol, but we can have water. Since we have to wait a while, why not?
BOOK You know, River, you are not the same little girl I met this morning.
RIVER You can't take the sky from me, since I've found Serenity.
She touches Jayne's arm, affectionately. Jayne looks a little weirded out by this, but Book's brain is still catching up.
They walk into the saloon.
INT. SALOON - DAY
There's a large ticking clock on the far wall, an upright piano in one corner - unattended, and a few scattered patrons. As Jayne, River and Book enter, they really scatter, leaving our heroes standing in an empty saloon.
JAYNE Damn hospitable.
RIVER Better this way. Less interference.
BOOK Could we get some water here? [repeats his question in Chinese]
The HAND of the BARTENDER hiding behind the bar reaches up, placing three bottles of water, labelled "Earth That Wasser" on the bar.
BARTENDER (O.S.) No charge!
BOOK Thank you, kindly.
They sit down at a table facing the windows, and wait. The clock ticks away.
JAYNE Wish it weren't so noisy. We all got watches.
The Bartender's hand, holding a small REMOTE CONTROL, reaches up. The clock's ticking is muted.
BOOK Hmm. Hologram?
BARTENDER (O.S.) The latest rage in the colonies.
JAYNE Weren't you fleeing for your life? Git!
The Bartender scrambles for the exit. The clock ticks away silently.
With the sun high in the sky, the Blue Hands walk from their ship across the desert, determined, cold expressions on their faces.
BLUE HAND ONE She's here.
BLUE HAND TWO Yes.
INT. TUNNEL - DAY
Mal rides behind Zoe, holding on for dear life. Zoe guns the engine and lets out a whoop as they accelerate down the tunnel on the flatbed.
Jayne inspects his guns, again. River meditates, Book reads his Bible. The men look almost bored. River suddenly stands up, eyes fixed ahead.
RIVER They's here. Comin' ta git me.
The sun high overhead, the Blue Hands stride purposefully through town. They regard the Saloon.
BLUE HAND ONE We are here for the fugitive River Tam. Send her out at once.
RIVER (O.S.) Not by the hair on my chinny chin chin!
Blue Hand Two pulls out he plastic rod we saw in "Ariel". A high pitched whine shrieks from it.
Jayne stumbles out of the saloon, his nose bleeding, and falls to the dirt a few metres from where the Blue Hands stand. They regard him for a moment, then resume their focus on the bar.
River pokes her head up to the window.
RIVER (CONT'D) No! Stop! I surrender! I surrender!
River exits the Saloon. The noise stops.
RIVER (CONT'D) I'll come quietly. I don't want any more deaths in my name.
With the Bluehands attention on River, Jayne stands up, an eager grin on his blood and sand covered face.
RIVER (CONT'D) Any more than the two of you, that is.
JAYNE Surprise!
They half-turn to Jayne. He fires. Blue Hand One goes down. Blue Hand Two brings the weapon around and concentrates on Jayne as hard as he can. The noise returns.
Nothing happens. Jayne lines up his shot.
JAYNE (CONT'D) You stay the hell outta my dreams Tyen-sah duh UH-muo!
Blue Hand Two falls, a fresh bullet hole in his forehead.
RIVER Didn't see that one coming, did you?
Book emerges from the bar, Bible in hand.
BOOK I wish there had been another way.
RIVER They never stop until they've found you. And if someone stops them, another two come to take their place. Two by two.
BOOK Well, then, let's hope this worked.
Book pulls an electronic device resembling a walkie talkie out of a hollowed out space in his Bible.
JAYNE Did you jam 'em?
BOOK I'm pretty sure. Standard procedure is to signal on approach and on confirmation of the target. They may have send out a message before they landed, we can't be sure. How are you two holding up?
Jayne touches his nose gingerly.
JAYNE You hit me real hard, Shepherd.
BOOK Sorry, had to look authentic.
JAYNE (to River) How're you?
RIVER They didn't know where I was coming from. You made an excellent simulrum.
JAYNE Hey! I ... (thinks) I know what that means! How do I know what that means?
RIVER My hero.
She stretches up and kisses him.
JAYNE Aw, fay hwa! well... (notices Book watching; old Jayne back) Can I have that ruttin' drink now?
EXT. WESTERN STREET - DAY, LATER
Jayne and River exit the saloon, arm in arm both a little tipsy. Book follows behind them, watching with curiosity. The bodies of the Blue Hands are gone; from the trails in the dust, they were dragged off somewhere.
Mal and Zoe approach on the flatbed. Jayne and River separate, Jayne looks guilty, River regards him with curiosity, then sways. He catches her. They walk down to the street to meet Mal and Zoe as they pull up.
Everyone looks surprised to see everyone else.
MAL What're you doin' here?
JAYNE What are you doin' here?
MAL I asked you first.
RIVER (imitating Jayne) Settlin' a score.
MAL Huh.
BOOK How was your meeting with your comrade in arms?
MAL Brief.
BOOK Parting is such sweet -
MAL He's dead. Alliance troops shot him.
JAYNE Shouldn't we be gettin' outta this xenophobic-assed planet, then?
Zoe looks surprised at Jayne's 50 cent word.
MAL Uh, that would be a yes. I take it Serenity is nearby?
JAYNE (indicates with a head tilt) That's right. Over yonder.
RIVER (to Zoe) Wash misses you.
ZOE Well, then, if you'll excuse me, sir, I'll take the fast way home.
Mal nods. She hops on the flatbed and zooms away.
MAL Well then, let's git.
They mosey for a while. People peek from behind curtains, but don't come out.
BOOK Folks here are wary of strangers.
MAL We noticed when we came. Our buddy Reid's been here since the war. Nobody goes nowhere, strangers are looked upon suspicious-like an' they take a strong dislike to change. Best sort of place for a paranoid type like our dear departed.
BOOK I'm sorry for the loss of your friend.
MAL Oh, he weren't that much of a friend, but he was generous. He left us a large fortune in small arms.
Jayne is interested.
JAYNE Any Gauss rifles?
MAL A few. We packed up what we could. (beat) Say, how did you all end up landing here when we kept our destination secret an' all?
JAYNE Just lucky, I guess.
BOOK We have a lot to cover.
JAYNE Cover! Shoot! Where's them bodies? What about the ship they came in?
An explosion rocks the town. A few stumble, but no-one is hurt. They look off to where it came from.
RIVER No trace. No-one must know. Two by two, hands of blue. Down to zero, and it blew.
Everyone looks at River. They shrug and resume walking.
MAL Well, at least things are back to normal.
BOOK Depends on your definition of "normal".
END ACT FOUR EPILOGUE
Jayne's cabin is full of open gun crates. He fondles a large stocky machine gun. There's a knock on the door.
JAYNE Yeah?
RIVER (O.S.) Can I come in?
JAYNE Uh...sure. (beat) Jus' let me clean up.
He starts to pack away the guns.
RIVER No, it's okay. Show me the shinies.
JAYNE You been hangin' around Kaylee?
RIVER Yes. (rolls eyes) She's with my brother. (little dance) They're busy "watching the stars go by" in the observation lounge. (blushes; continues in a rush) In the way, too distracting, too personal, don't want to eavesdrop, didn't get far, Wash misses Zoe, Zoe misses Wash, got turned around, Mal and Inara "talking", too much stress. Feeling dizzy. Came here.
JAYNE Uh, right. (beat) Well, here's a beauty.
He hands her the rifle he was just caressing. She looks on it with the same love and awe he has on his face, almost a reflection.
RIVER M41A pulse rifle. Ten millimeter with over-and-under thirty millimeter pump action grenade launcher. Nice. (beat) Heavy though.
She holds it up and sights it, handling it like a pro.
JAYNE Ah, that don't mean much if you practice enough.
He stands behind her, adjusts her weapon's sights. Their hands touch.
JAYNE (CONT'D) I mean, uh, you ain't big like me, but most guns these days they don't want much recoil -
RIVER On account of the A.G. fields.
JAYNE 'Zactly.
River puts the rifle gently, respectfully down into its case.
She swoons for a moment. We get QUICK FLASHES of the other crew in the middle of their romances.
River looks like she's about to fall and Jayne reaches out and steadies her.
RIVER You have some nice guns.
JAYNE Thanks.
She turns to face him touches his chest.
RIVER Nice big guns.
JAYNE (smiling) It ain't the size, it's the calibre.
River looks up at Jayne.
RIVER Make love to me?
JAYNE (stunned) Uh, sure?
She leaps up, wrapping her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck, kissing him. He holds on to her, but stumbles backwards.
They land in his bed, River straddling him. She starts pulling his clothes off.
RIVER Don't be confused. Or literal. This isn't love, it's need.
JAYNE You need me?
RIVER Yes.
JAYNE Okay. (beat) Why?
She kisses him again.
Another Blue Sun Ship flies through space, going somewhere purposefully.
Two new BLUE HANDS sit in the cockpit. The computer BEEPS. On a monitor, an image of River appears with some text beside it. It's the message the other team sent before breaking orbit.
BLUE HAND ONE They have considerable lead time.
BLUE HAND TWO Irrelevant. Acknowledge new orders and begin pursuit.
The Blue Sun Ship does an abrupt turn to a new heading, fires its main engine and rapidly fades into the distance, blending with the stars.
BLACK OUT
COMMENTS
Friday, June 25, 2004 9:37 AM
GMAJOR
Friday, June 25, 2004 10:09 AM
JIEJIE
Friday, June 25, 2004 12:07 PM
ZARK1976
Friday, June 25, 2004 1:47 PM
Friday, June 25, 2004 3:23 PM
AMDOBELL
Friday, June 25, 2004 3:52 PM
EMBERS
Friday, June 25, 2004 6:36 PM
Friday, June 25, 2004 9:18 PM
GUILDSISTER
Saturday, June 26, 2004 10:28 AM
NEROLI
Saturday, June 26, 2004 7:50 PM
ROCKHOUND
Wednesday, June 30, 2004 6:41 PM
SHAYZ
Tuesday, December 6, 2005 6:09 PM
WILLIAMJAMESW
You must log in to post comments.
YOUR OPTIONS
OTHER FANFICS BY AUTHOR