BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - GENERAL

TAMSIBLING

Shadow & Light
Sunday, November 26, 2006

A little existential look at Simon through River's eyes. S/K if you raise your arms over your head, close one eye and squint.


CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 2624    RATING: 9    SERIES: FIREFLY

A/N: This is completely independent of my current series.

Not exactly sure where this came from. It was originally titled "In Sunshine and In Shadow," so I suppose the song "Danny Boy" served as a bit of inspiration.

It's a little artsy for me, so let me know what you think ... I can wax poetic for days at a time, so I could be persuaded to write more like this!

Leiasky beta'd, but I made changes after the fact, so any remaining mistakes belong to me.

Enjoy!

***

He had always been in shadow; cloaked in grays and deep blues that kept him hidden from people, places and things. It wasn’t intentional, not when he was young, but it was all the same.

Studious. Serious. Simon.

The longer he lived there, skirting the light, the more comfortable, the more real, it became. It was home now, murky and unyielding; foggy and confusing. By the time Simon Tam stepped foot on Serenity he had become the shadow, stealthy and secret and afraid of the light.

But to her, he’d never been dark or cloudy, he’d been bright and warm. From the moment River was born, her brother, her ge ge, had filled her world with his love, his loyalty, his protectiveness and those emotions infused her mind, body and spirit with warmth and light.

Loving. Laughing. Simon.

Simon was her light, but she could not be the same for him. What had been done to her, what he had saved her from inspired his blackness. It was this betrayal, this tragedy that kept the light from returning, that clouded his heart with pockets of disease and despair. Her trauma had inflicted wounds on her brother no one could see, no one could touch, and only he could feel. Her brain had been sliced open by those thoughtless and horrible men, but Simon’s heart had been wrenched apart only to be hastily pieced back together again.

But sunshine is inevitable, like breathing or death, and even Simon could not stop the inevitable. His new source of light shined brighter than any sun, than any star, and it shined on him. It illuminated the dark, dusty places of his soul and coaxed his tired and beaten heart back to health. Not it, she.

Happiness. Love. Kaylee.

River kept to her shadows still; Simon had made comfortable havens there, respites for himself that she absconded, moving into these dark corners once he stepped into the light. She didn’t mind, it was the least she could do and it was where she belonged.

And Simon belonged with the light, with his sunshine, with Kaylee. Now his colors were orange and yellow, his smile big and wide, his eyes dancing and sparkling. And River felt peace. She had healed him, broken as she was. She had led him to his sunshine, just as he had led her. True, she now used his shadows to hide from the morass of her mind, but it didn’t matter. River knew she would spend the rest of her life absorbing the shadows if it meant her brother was never touched by them again. After all he had sacrificed, it was the least she could do.

***

Translations: Ge ge - big brother

COMMENTS

Sunday, November 26, 2006 8:45 PM

BLUEEYEDBRIGADIER


Damn...some brilliant work, TamSibling! Definitely could stand to see some more of your "waxing poetic for days," though I do hope some future work will deal with River moving from the shadows herself:D

Even if the fact pisses me of, the Tams have martyrdom complex written all over them:(

BEB

Monday, November 27, 2006 12:32 AM

JANE0904


Wow. And again. Wow. River really loves her brother, and for her to accept that she might have to be in the shadows for him to stay in the light, is just ... well ... wow.

Monday, November 27, 2006 1:47 AM

AMDOBELL


Absolutely brilliant! You really have showcased River and Simon in a unique but affecting way, so very true to each of them. What loyalty is there can compete with such selfless love? Very beautifully put together, Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me

Monday, November 27, 2006 5:29 AM

LEIASKY


I nearly fell out of my chair when I first read this. Something SHORT? From you?! Hee!

Even though it was short, it contained a very clear, touching and sad message. Very well done!

Monday, November 27, 2006 6:54 PM

FREDIKAYLLOW


really, very beautiful. really loved the beautiful imagery.
-Fred

Tuesday, November 28, 2006 7:51 AM

RIVERISMYGODDESS


I really liked this little piece, and the senitment from River at the very end was definitely touching.


POST YOUR COMMENTS

You must log in to post comments.

YOUR OPTIONS

OTHER FANFICS BY AUTHOR

Make a Wish (5/5)
Kaylee and Simon decide to keep the pregnancy a secret from the rest of the crew. An unexpected turn of events leaves them lost. Simon/Kaylee, River, Mal, Inara. PG-13

Make a Wish (4/5)
River keeps playing tricks on Jayne, while Kaylee finds out a secret that she has to share with Simon. PG-13. Simon/Kaylee

Make a Wish (3/5)
River goes to Inara for help, while Kaylee finally gets Simon to open up. NC-17 for some lovin'. Simon/Kaylee with appearances by River and Inara.

Make a Wish (2/5)
River's wish causes repercussions throughout the crew. Kaylee wants more details about Simon's first time, while Mal has a friendly tip for Jayne. R for suggestive language. Simon/Kaylee and crew.

Make a Wish - Chapter 1
Post-Miranda. River is turning 18 and she makes a wish that unsettles her brother. Simon/Kaylee, with the rest of the crew. PG-13 to R for suggestive language.

Homesick: Epilogue
Simon and his parents reach an understanding while Mal and Inara find themselves on the same page ... finally. Simon/Kaylee, Mal/Inara.

Homesick: Chapter 10
Mal's a bit surprised by the welcome her receives. Gabriel and Regan see the light, but Chen is anxious to keep them all in the dark. Simon/Kaylee, hints of Mal/Inara.

Homesick: Chapter 9
River decides to tell her parents the truth - all of it - and they're not happy. Kaylee is still reeling from her visit with Simon. And another Big Damn Hero joins the mix. Kaylee/Simon, hints of Mal/Inara.

Homesick: Chapter 8
River goes for help and finds Kaylee. Chen grows worried that the Tams will not press charges against their son and takes matters into his own hands. Kaylee manages to see Simon and it doesn't go so well. Kaylee/Simon, hints of Mal/Inara.

Homesick: Chapter 7
Kaylee and Inara get closer to Simon and River, while River makes a call to Mal. Simon despairs in prison and Kaylee pines after him. Simon/Kaylee, hints of Mal/Inara.