A/N: Okay, here we go - the rescue begins. Just keep in mind we're only halfway through this story - in case you were wondering!

Thanks once more to Kaynara and Leiasky.

And while I don't really want to let lose the space monkeys ... I will - so comment!

River watched the controls, studying the readouts as she did her best to sync up Serenity's presence with the now attached transport ship. Mal, Zoe and Jayne had already disembarked. River had wanted to join them, knowing she could be more than useful in a firefight, but Mal had insisted she stay with Serenity. We’re gonna need a fast getaway, darlin’, he’d told her, his eyes full of the mischievous twinkle they always held before a job. I need my pilot at the controls.

So, with very little argument, River had stayed behind with Badger, still trussed up in the passenger dorms, and Rafe. Shivering slightly, River pulled her knees up into her chest, wrapping her long, sinewy arms around them. She had not spoken to Rafe since her outburst in the galley a few hours ago and he had not come to find her either. She knew that Mal had told him more about her – about her ability to kill and fight like the assassin she’d been trained to be. She knew because she had felt Rafe’s repulsion at the realization of what she truly was and his immense pity at the girl she could no longer be.

Shaking the thoughts away, River turned her attention to the job at hand. Whatever she had had with Rafe or wanted with him was not meant to be – she was not meant to be a normal woman with feelings and passions. Those things would only serve to confuse her, to further aggravate the schism the Alliance had placed in her mind between killer and human, assassin and woman. While Rafe’s presence for a time had managed to calm her, anytime River tried to be both – tried to reconcile her special psychic abilities and her feelings for him, she could not strike a balance and something would spin out of control. The stronger her feelings became the more she feared she would eventually break apart for good.

The warning of the proximity alarm forced her attention back to the matter at hand. She watched intently as a small red dot approached the blue speck that denoted the targeted transport, and now, the docked Serenity. Taking a deep breath, River closed her eyes and listened hard for Mal and the rest of them. She could feel their anxiety, but also their steely resolve. The three of them were born fighters and the threat of a battle did not affect them as it would others. It was a form of anticipation, the start of the adrenaline rush in their veins, the engagement of other parts of their brains – the parts that crafted strategy and focused on survival. It was a state of preparedness that River, the assassin, could identify with and with a shaky breath, she mentally joined them as they readied for battle.

On the bridge of the transport ship, Amistad, Mal, Zoe and Jayne watched as the slaver ship approached. Zoe, closest to the controls, gave Mal a tight nod as she reported, “They’re comin’ in fast.”

Returning her nod, Mal turned to the ship’s captain and told him, “I think now would be a good time to begin the introductions.”

The man, an older gentleman who had obviously been flying in the black for a while, took a deep breath and then stepped towards the comm giving a slight nod to his communications officer. As the younger woman keyed open the channel, Mal watched her fingers shake just slightly and felt a pang of sympathy for her; she couldn’t have been much older than Kaylee.

“Unidentified freighter, this is Captain Michaels of the transport ship Amistad. Your current course brings you dangerously close. Please alter your trajectory.”

The hazy sound of static filled the room and Mal grimaced, sharing similar looks with his crewmen. Jayne frowned over the barrel of Vera, the hulking gun already primed and ready for a fight. As he looked to Zoe, his best friend said, “Well, it was worth a shot.”

Frowning, Mal told her, “You an’ Jayne get down to the cargo bay and set up positions like we discussed.” Glancing back to Captain Michaels, Mal ordered, “You send out another message.” Looking to the pilot, he added, “And you, start doing some fancy flyin’.”

The green pilot, whose skin had actually turned a light shade of lime, swallowed thickly at Mal’s forceful order before turning back to his controls and keying in an alternate path. As the ship lurched to one side, Mal caught his balance on the back of the nearest chair and glared at the terrified driver. The look of disapproval was lost on the younger man though as his eyes stayed locked on the viewscreen before him, his white-knuckled hold on the controls belying his attempt at calmness.

Wondering why he hadn’t brought River along, Mal waited impatiently as the captain again hailed the approaching freighter still getting no response. Knowing it was simply a lesson in futility and wasted breath, Mal placed a hard hand on the man’s shoulder and told him, “Look, our informant said there’s only ‘bout a dozen men on board. Me an’ my crew have taken’ out more.” Giving the gun on the man’s hip a furtive glance, Mal added, “Once I leave, lock them blast doors ‘til I tell you to open ‘em again. Got it?”

Nodding, Michaels drew his gun, cocking the barrel and checking the ammo. As Mal moved to exit, the older man called, “I’m still not sure why you’re doing this.”

Pausing, Mal looked back to him and said simply, “I got family on that boat.” Stepping over the threshold and into the hallway, he ordered sharply, “Lock these doors and wish us luck.”

“I’ve been praying since you boarded,” the captain said instead, hitting a button on the console at his side, the large metal doors clanging to a close.

Rolling his eyes as he started down the hallway, Mal muttered, “Great. Lotta good that’ll do.”

Knocking softly on the door to their room, Simon pushed it open to find Evelyn sitting at Kaylee’s side, the younger woman staring out the room’s big window. Evie turned sad eyes to Simon as he moved to her side and took her vacated seat next to Kaylee. Standing, she turned to Inara who had followed Simon inside and murmured, “I’ve never seen her so upset before.”

Squeezing the woman’s shoulder, Inara told her, “She’ll be all right. Kaylee’s strong.”

Simon took Kaylee’s hand as Evelyn moved to exit the room, Inara heading around to the other side of the bed and sitting next to her mei mei. “Kaylee, bao bei?” Simon gently rubbed his thumb along the back of her hand, swallowing back the pain her felt at seeing her so distraught. As she finally brought those large eyes to his face, he offered her a small smile and said, “Mal and the others, they have a plan. They’re going to get your family back.”

Blinking rapidly, Kaylee sat up sharply, grasping for Simon’s other hand and squeezing tightly. “Where? Where are they?”

“They’re intercepting the slaver ship before its last stop, Kaylee,” Inara interjected, running a hand through Kaylee’s hair and getting the young woman’s attention. “Mal promised to call as soon as everyone is back on board.”

“When?” Kaylee breathed, looking expectantly from Inara to Simon and back again.

“We don’t know, mei mei,” Inara confided. “It could be very soon or it might take awhile. You know Mal and his plans. He doesn’t always like to share the details.”

“Because he makes it up as he goes along,” Kaylee added dryly, getting a small chuckle from Inara and the slightest of smiles from Simon.

Focusing his attention back to his distraught fiancée, Simon rested a hand to her face and said, “See? It’s going to be all right.”

Holding his intense gaze, Kaylee nodded once, biting her lower lip to keep the insistent fear she still felt quelling in her gut at bay. Despite the fact that Mal had located her family and that they had put a plan into motion to get them back, Kaylee was still not convinced that she would ever see her family again. She had, after all, been privy to quite a few of Mal’s plans in the past. His track record was not exactly confidence-inspiring.

As Kaylee kept her silence, Simon shared a look with Inara and the older woman took the hint. Rising gracefully, she pressed a kiss to Kaylee’s forehead and whispered, “I’ll be back as soon as I have some news. Take care of yourself, Kaylee.”

Smiling weakly to her, Kaylee’s eyes watched Inara go, before they sank slowly to her lap. Sighing heavily, she slumped unceremoniously against the headboard, pulling her hands away from Simon and tugging the covers up around her chest. “I’m tired, Simon,” she said lamely, avoiding his concerned gaze.

“I know, it’s all right.” Edging closer, Simon studied her face, noting the worry lines and paleness that had replaced her natural glow and normally smooth skin. Running a hand through her hair, he asked, “Are you hungry? It’s past dinner time and you slept through lunch.”

Shaking her head once, Kaylee sighed heavily again, shifting her gaze to stare at the ceiling. “I just wanna go back to sleep.”

Sighing, Simon tried not to let his frustration show, but he knew it would soon be a battle he would lose. “Kaylee, you have to eat. This isn’t healthy.”

Growing more petulant at his scolding, Kaylee glared at him angrily. “Jus’ leave me be, Simon. I’m a grown woman, I can take care of myself.”

“Obviously, you can’t.” Simon snapped his mouth shut as soon as the words were out, regretting that he’d thought them, let alone said them. Kaylee’s angry expression colored with hurt and he watched helplessly as more tears pooled in her eyes. Reaching for her cheek, she batted his hand away and Simon pulled back instantly. Taking a deep breath, he tried to bring his anxiety back under control. “I’m sorry, Kaylee. That’s not what I meant. You need to eat and keep up your strength.” Pausing he took another deep breath and met her still wide-eyed gaze. “I’m worried about you. That’s all I’m trying to say.”

Kaylee stared for a moment, her chest heaving still with a bit of anger and a lot of hurt. She knew, deep down in the rational part of herself that her behavior was setting Simon on edge. She also knew it was unhealthy and wrong and while she was perfectly aware that her reaction to this situation could be deemed irrational, Kaylee had been unable to force herself to do anything differently. Even making love to Simon had only eased her pain for moments, causing the despair and hopelessness she felt to come crashing in more acutely the moment the euphoria passed.

“I know,” she admitted quietly, and with a sigh, she pushed the covers off of herself, scooting to the far edge of the bed and standing. Simon watched in silence as she moved on unsteady legs to their large closet, entering the space and rummaging about. When she emerged a few minutes later with a large suitcase in her hand and an armful of clothes, he felt his heart drop to his feet.

Rounding the bed as Kaylee sat the suitcase down and began to meticulously pack it, Simon questioned, “What are you doing?”

Her voice was monotone and it cut through Simon like the sharpest knife. “It ain’t right for me to be doin’ this to you,” she explained evenly, working each garment off its hanger before folding it and placing it gently in the bag. “You don’t need any o’ this stress an’ you certainly ain’t gonna wanna marry someone who so obviously can’t handle it when things get tough.”

Watching the love of his life slipping away, Simon’s desperation finally took over. Grabbing Kaylee by the shoulders he spun her around and told her harshly, “Stop this. Kaylee, you are stronger than this.”

With a heavy sigh, she did not meet his gaze, but answered in a whisper, “No, Simon, I ain’t.” Finally forcing her eyes to his face, she told him haltingly, “That’s just it. I ain’t this strong. I barely survived losing the baby … if my whole family-“ Pausing abruptly, Kaylee swallowed hard feeling the rise of a sob in her throat. She dropped her eyes again, unable to take the pain she saw reflected in Simon’s. “I won’t survive losing all o’ them an’ I ain’t takin’ you down with me.”

Resolutely stepping out of his hold, Kaylee finished her packing in silence. Simon could only stare, fear and sadness swirling uncomfortably in his gut. He had wondered over the past days if there was any way this could get worse; he realized now they had finally hit bottom.

The brisk sound of the bag being zippered pulled Simon from his reverie. Glancing to Kaylee as she hefted the bag up, he realized she had changed while he had been staring off into space, her hair now fixed into a high bun on her head. She was wearing no makeup and while her normally glowing skin did not require any, the deep, dark circles under eyes and red, puffy skin from her tears aged and weathered her beyond her years.

His heart breaking, Simon watched Kaylee stare at him for a moment, before moving forward and pressing a kiss to his cheek. “I’m sorry, Simon,” she whispered against his skin, willing her voice not to crack. She needed to do this for him, needed to walk away so he would not be saddled with a woman who could barely function.

Squeezing his eyes closed, Simon released a long, suffering sigh and reached for her wrist as she moved past him. “No,” he said firmly, his voice still even, but leaving no room for argument.

Defeated, Kaylee dropped her chin to her chest and murmured, “Please don’t make this harder than it already is.”

“How could this be harder?” he asked her. “You know running away isn’t the answer. It wasn’t the answer last time and it certainly isn’t now.”

With a hard glare, Kaylee’s head snapped up, her eyes searching his face. Pulling out of his grasp she hissed, “I thought I was helpin’ you before. You know that.”

“And did you?” Simon’s hurt was quickly morphing into anger. He watched as Kaylee dropped the bag at her feet, crossing her arms resolutely over her chest. He had tried, really he had, to keep his anger at bay as the situation quickly spiraled out of control, but he would not allow Kaylee to unilaterally decide that their life together was over. He would not allow her to walk out on him again – not unless she was really doing it for good. “Did you help me, Kaylee?” Simon demanded, stepping forward and meeting her hard gaze with one of his own. “You almost got killed!”

“I know!” She screamed the words, hot tears pooling at the corners of her eyes. “You don’t think I know how stupid it was?”

“Then why are you doing it again?” So help him, he wanted answers. If Kaylee was really going to walk out that door and break his heart, he wanted to know why.

“Because!” Her voice had risen in volume, the tears she’d been fighting falling in steady streams down her blotchy cheeks. Taking another breath, she screwed up her face to force out an explanation and only managed to again yell, “Because …”

Simon watched her struggle, fighting every muscle in his body that screamed at him to go to her. She was trembling again, and had wrapped her arms around her waist. Dropping her head, he watched as she took a few long, deep breaths and when she again raised her eyes to his face, the anger he’d seen had been replaced with despair. “Because I’m scared,” she finally choked out. Taking another shaky breath, she continued. “I’m scared that if I lose ‘em, I’ll lose whatever’s left o’ me. An’ you won’t …” Shuddering, she backed up to sit on the bed, her eyes glued to her feet. “An’ that you won’t like that girl, let alone love her or wanna marry her.”

Sighing heavily, Simon stared at her for a few more moments, doing his best to collect his thoughts. After a long silence that he knew had to be setting Kaylee on edge, he moved towards her, kneeling before her, his hands resting gently on her knees. “Kaylee,” he said softly, the anger and frustration he’d felt receding into concern and love. “You have to know that’s not true. It’s not possible – I could never not love you.”

“I know that,” Kaylee sighed and finally looked to him. Resting a light hand to his cheek, she added, “I love you so much, I just can’t stand the thought of hurtin’ you.”

Pulling her into his arms, Simon hugged her tightly, more than relieved when Kaylee held him back just as fiercely. “Kaylee, the only way that could happen is if you left me.” Pressing a kiss to her temple, he leaned back and met her watery gaze. “I love you and I will love you for the rest of my life. Tell me you know that?”

Swallowing thickly, Kaylee kissed him lightly and murmured, “I do. I swear, Simon, all o’ this, it ain’t about you or anythin’ you’ve done wrong. It’s me.” Dropping her arms to her lap, she told him, “I jus’ … I can’t shake this feeling that I’m losin’ myself an’ I don’t know what to do.”

Realizing that whatever Kaylee was struggling with went deeper than her missing family, Simon shifted to sit beside her and asked gently, “Losing yourself how?”

Shrugging slightly, Kaylee sighed once again, leaning into Simon’s side, her head on his shoulder. Wrapping an arm around her, he waited patiently, until she finally said, “Like I’m not Kaylee anymore. Like I’m somebody different who’s crazy over not bein’ pregnant an’ worries ‘bout things like table settings an’ china. Like –“

“Like a wife,” Simon whispered into her hair, closing his eyes and fighting the apprehension he felt. Pulling away to give her a sidelong glance, he murmured, “Now who’s got cold feet?”

Pulling back and meeting his gaze with a surprised one of her own, Kaylee told him indignantly, “I do not.” As Simon cocked an eyebrow at her, and regarded her for a moment more, she finally admitted, “’Kay, maybe a little.”

His lips quirking into a small grin, Simon tucked a wayward strand of hair behind her ear and asked, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Shrugging, Kaylee averted her eyes, this time out of embarrassment, not pain. “I wasn’t so sure what was wrong.” Pausing, she licked her lips and forced herself to continue. “I’ve been wantin’ to be your wife for so long, I figured it’d just pass. But then when we found out about my family an’ I still weren’t pregnant …” She didn’t finish the statement and she didn’t need to. Simon, his arm still about her shoulders, tugged her back to his side, dropping a kiss to the top of her head.

Kaylee sighed contentedly, feeling lighter for the first time since they’d heard the terrible news and curled into his side, an arm around his waist. She thought of her foolishness, her eyes alighting to the suitcase she had mistakenly packed and she rolled her face into his shoulder, trying to forget the last thirty minutes. Why she kept thinking that running away was the answer, she had no idea. She was simply glad that Simon had refused to let her go.

Simon’s eyes were also focused on the bag, haphazardly dropped in the middle of the room. It did anger him that Kaylee had seemed so ready to abandon their life, but he also knew how frightened she was, and Simon would have been lying if he said that during River’s really bad times, he hadn’t thought of leaving her behind on Serenity and disappearing. But of course, he couldn’t and he hadn’t. She was his mei mei, just as Kaylee was his bao bei and he would die to keep them both in his life.

His hand running gently down her back, he asked quietly, “Kaylee, do you still want to get married?”

Inhaling a sharp breath, Kaylee bit her lip, and closed her eyes, offering a silent prayer to Buddha and the Shepherd that she had not ruined her chance to be Simon’s wife. Pulling away from him, she met his blue-eyed gaze, smiling softly as she recognized the tension lining his eyes. Placing one hand on each of his cheeks, Kaylee kept her gaze focused on his and told him firmly, “Simon Tam, I would marry you a hundred times in the middle of a desert, just so long as I get to be your wife.”

Smiling softly, Simon placed his hands over hers, bringing them both to his mouth and kissing them. Kaylee returned his smile at the sweet gesture, the grin actually reaching her eyes. Keeping a hold of her hands, Simon tugged her gently to him and pressed their lips together. It was a light kiss at first, nothing particularly passionate about it, simply a comfort, a sign of affection. But as they parted, their noses and mouths merely inches from each other, Kaylee inhaled deeply and smelled the familiar, clean Simon scent she so adored and leaned in again.

As her lips again met his, Kaylee’s eyes fluttered closed, her long, tear-stained lashes falling to her cheeks as she lost herself in his touch. Simon returned her affections, his hands dropping hers into his lap, so he could wrap strong arms around her back and pull her tight to him. Their mouths parted almost simultaneously, warm breaths mingling as their tongues met, caressing and teasing each other. Passion igniting deep in her belly and radiating down each limb, Kaylee wrapped her arms around Simon’s neck, pulling herself into his lap, as each of them refused to let go. One of Simon’s strong, smooth hands slid down her back, to her bottom, cupping one of the firm cheeks and squeezing lightly, while the other hand ran up into her hair, cradling the back of her head.

They finally broke apart, panting and flushed, their foreheads resting together as they fought to catch their breaths. Moving both of his hands to the small of her back, Simon kneaded the flesh there, feeling the tenseness in her muscles and hoping he could simply massage it away.

As Kaylee moaned softly at the exquisite feel of his fingers working against her flesh, she finally found the courage to speak. “Simon?” she murmured, her fingers still playing with the strands of hair at the base of his neck.

“Yes, Kaylee?” he asked softly, brushing a quick kiss to the tip of her nose as his hands moved higher up her back, massaging all the way.

Swallowing hard, she tilted away from him, looking into his eyes. “Do you still want to marry me?”

Pausing, Simon held her gaze, noticing the small flash of fear that glinted in her green eyes. “Absolutely,” he answered firmly before kissing her again.

Once again breathless by the time they parted, Kaylee closed her eyes as she rested her forehead to Simon’s and murmured, “Then let’s do it.”

Puzzled, he pulled back and met her gaze as she blinked those green eyes at him. “Shen me?”

“Let’s get married,” she told him, a familiar light back in her eyes.

“We will, bao bei,” Simon reassured, cradling her face in his hands. “As soon as Mal and the others find your family and bring them here, we’ll reschedule everything.”

Shaking her head once, Kaylee’s face fell just a bit and Simon’s heart fell with it. “They may not find ‘em, Simon.”

“Kaylee-“

“You know it’s true,” she interrupted firmly. As he acquiesced with a slight nod, she continued, her voice even. “There is a chance they ain’t gonna find ‘em, no matter how hard they look. An’ we can’t …” Feeling a small catch in her throat, Kaylee swallowed hard and willed herself to continue. “We can’t keep puttin’ our lives on hold. We done that far too much as it is, both o’ us,” she added, her gaze just a tad challenging.

Sighing, Simon dropped his eyes to his lap and admitted, “River.”

Nodding once, Kaylee added, “An’ the miscarriage.” As she met his concerned gaze, she smiled softly and said, “But we can’t let them things stand in our way. Not no more.”

Smiling to her, Simon leaned forward and brushed a kiss to her mouth. “You don’t have to do this to prove a point, Kaylee,” he told her softly, his fingers running down her cheek lightly.

Shaking her head once, Kaylee assured, “I ain’t. I jus’ wanna be your wife.”

“Even without our family and friends there?” he asked, brushing her hair off her neck and resting his hand against her shoulder. “Even without the big party and the dress?”

Swatting playfully at his arm, Kaylee reminded him, “You tol’ me yourself the weddin’ should be ‘bout two people, you an’ me. An’ you was right.”

Eyeing her in silence for a moment more, Simon kissed her again. “You’re sure? Without Inara or Mal or your family?”

Nodding once, Kaylee replied, “Without River?”

Nodding, Simon smiled, “She’ll forgive me.” Realizing the kind of pain she could inflict on him if he was wrong, Simon grimaced. “I hope.” As Kaylee giggled, one of the best sounds Simon could ever remember hearing, he asked, “What are we going to wear? And where are we going to go?”

Rising, Kaylee tugged on his hand, pulling him towards their large walk-in closet. “Well, you got your suit, right?” As he nodded, she entered the large space, and reached for an opaque garment bag he had seen her bring home a few weeks ago. “An’ I got the honeymoon outfit.” As his eyebrows quirked, Kaylee again laughed and corrected him. “Not that outfit, the one for when we’d be leavin’ the reception.”

As Kaylee moved to step around him and claim the bathroom first, Simon gently held her elbow. Meeting her eyes, he asked softly, “Are you sure about this?”

Nodding once, Kaylee stood on her tiptoes and kissed him. “I am, as long as you are.”

Smiling that ridiculously swai grin she adored, Simon nodded, heading for the closet as Kaylee turned for the bathroom. Poking his head around the corner, he told her, “We’re going to need witnesses, you know?”

Stopping in mid-stride, Kaylee frowned slightly and then thought of something absolutely perfect. Turning back to him, she smiled wide and asked, “Are Eli an’ Evelyn still here?”

Mal felt the ship shudder beneath his feet. Grimacing, he rechecked the ammo in his gun while clicking on the comm at his belt. “Zo?”

“They’ve locked on, sir.” Her controlled, clipped tone was as soothing to Mal’s nerves as any balm. Knowing he could always count on her had been a constant in his life for over a decade.

“Stay sharp an’ stay alive,” he ordered her firmly before shutting down the comm. Muttering a silent prayer to the Shepherd, just for the heck of it, Mal wedged his body into a tight spot and waited.

Chapter 13