He was glaring at the inside of his cup, did it a lot as of late. The liquid was deep amber, like a thinned out tree sap, glimmered in light if it was poured in bonafide glass. Also smelled as sharp as it tasted. Zoe had given it to him once, few years back when they had had a good run and some pocket change. She had slipped him the white ceramic bottle nonchalantly, no Happy Birthday or anything, just the bottle and a quick wisp of a smile.

“Mind if I have a have a little?”

He tilted his chin up, a tad foggy eyed and surprised to see Inara there. “Didn’t think a woman of your standing drank such strong spirits.”

“I have been known to partake.” Sitting down next to him, she set a crystal lowball glass on the table and met his eyes to measure his drunkenness. “Just a little.”

For a man that had had a few, his hand was steady as he poured her just enough to fill a whiskey glass. “Nice cup, gotta collection?”

“Thank you.” She tipped the glass to him, the drink glittering and dancing gold in the crystal “And you’d be surprised.”

“No doubt, many facets to you.”

“Hmm.” She took a sip. “Didn’t know you had a bottle of Amber Sun.”

“It’s my super secret cache, dust it off once in awhile.” He explained in a low voice.

“Does it help with the pain?” She eyed the sling his left arm was in.

“Feels brand new.” He flashed a brief, dry smile before returning to his sullen expression he had mastered so well.

“The word around Serenity is you got shot, Captain.” She supplied, curious as to his reaction.

His brows twitched and furrowed. “Been shot worse.”

“I don’t doubt that a second.” She took another sip, still trying to reach through the fogginess of his eyes and get to what was behind it.

“How are those new daughters you just procured?” He brought his cup to his lips and let it burn down his throat.

“Now that they have the medication they needed they’re doing much better.” She announced. “Hannah opened her eyes.”

“Good. Talk?”

“Yes, however Simon spent some time with her and diagnosed her with amnesia.”

“So she doesn’t,”

“Not a thing.” Inara focused on her glass. “Simon thinks it’s probably a blessing though, if/when she remembers anything there would be an immense amount of trauma. He doesn’t think she’ll gain anything back though, he’s had some experience with amnesia when he worked at the Core hospital. She went through so much her mind is protecting itself.”

“Huh. So it’s just like someone hit restart?”

“Pretty much. I told her I was her mother now and she readily accepted it.”

“That’s good. You name the baby?”

“Kalilah, Lila for short.”

“Arabic, beautiful name.” There was a nod of approval. “Hannah and Lila Serra, has a nice ring to it. Does your Guild know about your venture into parenting?”

“They’ve been contacted and I’ve been sent over paperwork to make this an official adoption.”

“Any rules?”

“Actually no, Companions are able to have families; it’s actually smiled upon. Daughters and sons have been known to follow in their mothers’ footsteps, it brings a certain pedigree.”

“So this is gonna go smooth.”

“I think so, my House Priestess congratulated me, she was happy to hear I had taken up motherhood. Apparently I’m suited for it.”

“Good for you. You gotta go through a process or something?”

“Paperwork, mostly. The adoption process is so scattered from system to system it’s apparently fairly easy.” Her dark, warm eyes fixated on some of the stenciled flowers on the sunny colored walls. Bright, happy flowers helped her imagine healthy daughters. “I will however be taking them to Sihnon at some point. Guild tradition states I must take them to the House of my own origins for a ceremonial gathering honoring my transition into parenthood as well as welcoming the girls into the Guild Family.”

“If you pass along some dates I’ll make sure we’ll get you to a transport that heads into the core.” He told her, foggily. “Apologize for not being able to sail you in, but I can’t risk a flight into Alliance space. We aren’t exactly popular right now.” He took another drink, smirking into the glass. “Piece of mĭ tián gòng Keller was, he was also a decorated vet of the War and had family times to quite a few councils.” Scoffing, he rolled his shoulders forward, drawling out. “And I made his face into a gorram canoe.”

Inara didn’t say anything for a spell, she watched the way his chest heaved and he rubbed his jaw. When he sniffed and took a drink, she finally spoke. “I need you to quit mourning over this. He was a monster, he took advantage of you, and you’ve been in far worse trouble.”

Mal didn’t look at her. “I ain’t in the mood for you telling me what to do.”

“You’ve been wallowing in your own pity since you learned you were transporting slaves...”

“Mind your own affairs.” He warned, hackles clearly raised.

“You got your pound of flesh Mal, and rightfully so.”

“I’m serious.”

“I know what you’re,”

Mal rose to his feet so quickly, so abruptly, so forcefully she half expected him to overturn the table on his way up. He didn’t look at her, didn’t say a thing. Weaving some from the imbibe, he finally glowered down at her, shadowed as the lights banked off the cap of his scull. He didn’t look like Malcolm Reynolds, not the one she knew, even at his meanest. Someone else, from another time and place, was there. His breathing was a staggered shuddering, and his fists were balled up as his jaw was so tight it was a wonder his teeth didn’t crack. He just stared down at her, a whole ‘nother creature, one whose scars were deep, knotted stigmas that had made him thick like pine bark, and whose face was nothing but weathered plains.

Footsteps weren’t heard, but the call to Inara eventually was. She turned to see Simon, tired still, but startled that he found the two of them with the Captain in such a hostile pose.

“Is, everything alright?” He asked, cautious to Mal’s position. Never to think the Captain as an abuser, he was sure the rage wasn’t directed at the Companion, but the streak of rage showing had potential for self inflicted harm.

The Captain glared at him, the next breath deeper than the last. Without so much as a reassurance, he turned away towards his bunk.

Inara blinked, remembering to breathe her own self. “I’m not sure.” She said, taking a sip of the amber liquid to still her nerves. “Is everything alright?”

“Every thing’s fine.” He reassured, before giving her his first smile in a week. “A little more than fine, your baby’s awake, and I think she needs a bottle.”

The announcement cleared her head, and she followed him down the stairs to indeed hear the hungry cries of her new daughter.

Mal turned in the hallway, focusing on the corridor where they had disappeared. Leaning to the side, he allowed his shoulder to rest against the wall, and his ear to press against the metal to hear Serenity’s steady purr. Hearing her hum made his breath slow, and his eyes close. Turning, he pressed his back flat against her cool metal, and slid down to sit as a crumpled mess on the floor.

He didn’t know how long time had passes when he felt a strong hand squeeze his wrist. It was warm, human, the thumb dragged across the soft underside of his forearm. Opening his eyes, he let out a deep breath as a face came into focus.

Zoe didn’t say anything. Wordlessly, she slung his good arm over her shoulder and helped him up.

***

His head felt like a bandsaw had gone through it. Thankfully when he opened his eyes, the lights were off save for a little blue one in the corner. It took Mal a few minutes to breath deep and will himself to sit. When his head started spinning, he propped himself up by resting his shoulder against the curved hull of Serenity. She purred soothingly to him, and it made him let out a deep breath.

When his vision finally focused, he saw his first mate sitting in his desk chair. One leg cross over the other, hands laced patiently in her lap, watching him. She didn’t make a move towards the bunk, her eyebrow quirked a touch and her posture straightened.

“Zoe.” He absently looked down and saw his shirt was off.

“Good morning Sir.”

“You ain’t gonna help me?”

“You don’t want me fussin’ over you.” She reasoned. “I got fluids though when you’re ready.”

He nodded, his breathing shallow. “Alright. Thanks.”

“Just returning the favor, sir.”

“Hm.” He shut his eyes, nodding. “Where’d my shirt go?”

“Trash chute.”

“Huh.” Mal took another deep breath. “I think I’ll try the fluids.”

She got up, grasping the chair and taking it with her to sit next to the bed. Zoe reached to her side and opened up the satchel she had been wearing, pulling out an IV bag, line and needle, she hung the bag on the chair, then reaching over and took his wrist.

“What...” opening his eyes to see her taking a tourniquet and wrap it tight around his arm. “Hey,” flinching, he gave her a confused expression.

“Quit squirming, Sir.” She held on more tightly and fixed the needle in place, ignoring his sudden pout. “This is the fastest way to clean you up.” pasting a piece of tape to his skin to make sure the needle didn’t slip out, she fussed over the line to make sure it was free of kinks.

“Doc know about this?”

“No.” Pulling the tourniquet off, she pumped the bag with her fist to get the flow going. “I reckon he’s got bigger things to worry about instead of you having one too many.”

“I believe you’re right.” Fixing his stare on the little piece of tube that ended at the crook of his elbow, Mal wiggled his fingers. “You gonna preach ta me?”

Zoe pursed her lips for a moment, shaking her head just a touch. “Don’t need ta tell you how much of a jackass you’re actin’ like right now, Sir. Reckon you already know that.”

“You have a point.”

“All I can tell you is we’ve been wānqŭ zài zhuō before, reckon there was a silver lining to this cloud though.”

His eyes peeled up to read her face. Zoe was not frustrated, nor angry, she was merely in a state of understanding and reason.

“Outta all the ones that didn’t make it, two did, counts for something.” face soft, eyes focused on her own hands. “That little one’s been vocal since she woke, Hannah’s awake, both better by leaps and bounds. Doc’s astounded himself.” Meeting his gaze, she held it, showing the utmost sincerity. “I remember some old space dog once telling me sometimes the littlest victories are the ones that matter the most.”

Mal glanced down to his sweat covered sheets. Mulling it over, he rubbed the back of his neck.

“Ain’t sayin’ it shouldn’t hurt, but it’ll hush some if you look at the situation a little differently.”

Pursing his lips, he scratched the back of an ear.

“Gotta count the wins, no matter how small.” Walking over to a small table, she scooped up a stack of clothes. “Only thing that’s gonna keep us goin’.” Heading back to the bed, she unceremoniously tossed the clothes onto the mattress. “Keep yourself tied to that bag for a spell, but at least put a shirt on and send a Wave ta Charlemagne. He called in this morning, sounded like he had a job for us.”

Mal watched her turn and head towards the ladder. “You givin’ me orders Zoe?”

“It’s what happens you decide ta wake up after sleeping the day away, Sir.”

fin

*** *** *** DEFINITIONS/TRANSLATIONS mĭ tián gòng: excrement wānqŭ zài zhuō: bent over the table

A/N: Honest Comments are always appreciated