BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - ROMANCE

LANCECONSTABLELOGAN

In The Way - Chap. 4
Monday, November 7, 2005


CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 2646    RATING: 9    SERIES: FIREFLY

A/N: Ask and you shall recieve! Thanks for all the love you marvolous peoples! See you give me love and you get a chapter and a half! Pretty cunning, huh?

Kaylee’s hair was slipping out of her bun. From across the table, Simon tried not to stare at the soft curls lying against her neck and cheek. She rested her head against the heel of her hand and ate wearily, almost asleep as she spooned rice into her mouth. Their eyes met suddenly when her gaze flicked up but something caught her attention and her head turned. He took the opportunity to look down at his plate but he watched out of the corner of his eye. She was staring at Jayne and Simon felt a sudden dropping sensation in his gut. Kaylee turned back to the doctor after a moment and he carefully dissected a bit of protein, pretending he had not been staring himself. Simon couldn’t see what happened next but he did see Kaylee shove the remains of her half-eaten dinner toward Jayne. He looked up just in time to watch her back as she hurried up the steps and out the door. Everyone at the table exchanged curious and surprised glances in reaction to Kaylee’s sudden departure. Everyone but Jayne. He watched the mechanic’s retreat until she wasn’t visible and then frowned down at the plate she had handed him. “Now what’s eatin’ her?” Mal demanded of the world at large. The captain turned his sharp disapproving gaze onto Simon. “I don’t know.” Even Simon was surprised by how bewildered he sounded. He hadn’t even talked to Kaylee today. What could he have done? He really didn’t know. Everything seemed inexplicable to him since he had learned of Jayne’s feelings. The doctor’s eyes drifted back to the mercenary. Jayne had transferred the food on Kaylee’s plate to his own- although Simon noticed he hadn’t touched her biscuit. He hadn’t even moved to butter it. Look, Simon wanted to shout, he won’t eat her biscuit! Can’t you people see? The conversation resumed slowly and Simon attempted to continue his meal as though everything were normal. Jayne finished bolting his food and he picked up his and Kaylee’s plate to take to the sink. Her biscuit had disappeared, Simon noticed but he didn’t know where. He knew Jayne hadn’t eaten it. A few minutes later, a sudden though occurred to Simon and he shoveled the last of his food into his mouth before hastily following Jayne.

The big man was in the engine room, just as Simon had suspected. Crouched on the floor with her again, like conspirators. The mechanic and the mercenary had always looked annoyingly comfortable with each, Simon noticed. Their body language was easy and natural- familiar even. Jayne himself even looked gentler somehow. He was still a huge bear of a man but with Kaylee he looked protective rather than aggressive. Disquieting. That’s what it was- distinctly disquieting. Simon greeted Kaylee stiffly and inquired into her lack of appetite. She assured him it was nothing and for a moment he could think of absolutely nothing to say. Jayne’s presence was nagging at his attention. As though responding to the pressure of Simon’s notice, the big man got up abruptly and moved to leave. The doctor found himself standing in the door, inadvertently blocking the path. “You’re in my way little man.” Didn’t Simon know it. After Jayne was gone, the doctor made small meaningless talk with Kaylee and helped her off the floor absently. When he moved to let go of her hand she touched him- a warm deliberate touch that terrified him even as it heated the blood under his skin. He saw her expression as he turned away from her, so warm and willing and hopeful. Simon could have her almost anytime he wanted her- and when this thought occurred to him, he felt almost physically sick. He never wanted to use her- it’s why he had resisted her all this time. He could hear Jayne’s voice in his mind, “Some rich boy’d use her and throw her away . . .” He didn’t want that. He didn’t want to- to be with her and then wake up and realize it was the result of his loneliness or desperation or tension. She deserved better. And her obvious and simple affection for him was precious. It made him want to protect her even from himself. Reaching into her toolbox, Simon ran his fingers over cold hard metal, hoping to freeze out the memory of her touch still warm on his skin. Kaylee told him how she listened to Serenity sometimes, cracked open and defenseless. Seeing her embarrassment at the confession, Simon reassured her that he understood. “Do you?” She asked and for once she was really looking at him, without the rosy glasses and the thinly veiled hero worship. Genuine scrutiny from Kaylee was strange and he felt a moment like taking one step outside of himself and then back again. Scrutinizing himself, Simon realized he didn’t really understand. He had never been truly defenseless with anyone. His eyes fell. Sitting beside Kaylee’s toolbox was a biscuit. Kaylee had moved closer so she could look at the face that he had turned away from her. His expression was so thoughtful. She touched his arm gently. “Simon?” She asked. Her eyes were as soft and sweet as her touch. Simon stepped back away and forced a smile. “I should go. I have to give River her medication before she goes to bed.” He could see the rejection on her face quite clearly. He rested his own hand on hers briefly. “Sweet dreams.” He walked away quickly. She watched him walk away until he disappeared around a bend in the corridor. Eyes falling down to the mess at her feet, Kaylee snatched up a wrench suddenly and flung it away as hard as she could. It ricocheted off the wall with a loud clang and she felt instantly sorry and ashamed. She rushed over to pat the wall with a hand still shaking from anger. “I’m sorry, pretty girl.” The mechanic told Serenity full of desperation and distress, “I’m not mad at you.” The paint under her fingers was chipped where the wrench had landed. Oh, god. Kaylee rested her forehead against the mark, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. . . ”

COMMENTS

Monday, November 7, 2005 3:21 PM

SAMEERTIA


Been reading. Couldn't remember if I'd reviewed before.

Nice stuff! Keep it coming!

Monday, November 7, 2005 3:41 PM

BELACGOD


Poor Kaylee...I love her dialogue with Serenity.

Keep writing!

Monday, November 7, 2005 5:22 PM

RINNYPJ


I am always so excited to see you update! You do our Jayne and Kaylee such justice!

And I just love the triangle you're developing here. Yay!

Wednesday, November 9, 2005 1:56 AM

BELLONA


what did our Serenity ever do to kaylee, huh?

b


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