This is my first. Any and all comments are welcomed. (be gentle! :-)

From the mind of Jayne Cobb

She is the only woman he’s ever been afraid of.

From the first day they met…rather, the first day he’d tried to hold her and Mal up he’s had a fascination with her. Tall, lookin him right in the eyes and that wild hair, like a mane. She was like a statue. An ass kickin statue with a great set of legs. He didn’t think about bedding her, like he usually did when coming across a woman. He thought, now there’s a girl who could kick my ass, and I’d like it. Never could he understand the bond between her and Mal, nor what she saw in that loopy pilot, but he marveled at her just the same.

And it did something to him, seeing her like this.

Ever since her husband died cuz of ‘em gorram reavers, she aint been the same. Wonderin’ round the ship at all hours, spacing out at the table (even when he said somethin’ stupid), and worse, almost getting herself killed on their last job. Their last measly job. Like she had a death wish or somethin’. He just couldn’t understand.

She was worse than River, who was no help cuz she was actin’ like Wash was somewhere still ‘round the ship. Freaked him out.

Mal was at his wits end, which wasn’t that far of a journey, heh. He needed all the help he could get and Zoe wasn’t givin. And whenever Mal asked him for help, he felt as if he was overstepping some boundary; as if he was fulfilling the duties only Zoe could and should. Everyone else seemed to be forcing themselves to move on. Kaylee and Simon were at it like rabbits. Inara was hardly ever around, busy with her whorin’ or whatever. That crazy girl mostly took over the piloting, unsettlingly enough. Mal was scouring the ‘verse for work and worrying about his first mate, who was oblivious to all. And there was him. He missed Book. The man didn’t have sex, but he knew a bunch about other stuff. Spotted him when he lifted weights. One of the only members of the crew who didn’t make him feel like a dope, conversing with him and such.

But he remained fixated on her.

What could he do? Make her laugh? She hasn’t done it since… Fix her something to eat? Protein can only be made in so many ways. Start a fight with her. No, she’d either kill him right off or let herself lose… Did she need manly comfort? He’s always been good at it, hell, he’s been known for it! Not her. That’s not what she needed. All the drugs in doc’s case couldn’t give her what she needed. Her faith had been shot to hell, just like Mal’s and it was only a matter of time before, like him, she replaced it with anger. Hell, that’d be better than how she was now. What could he do…

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Zoe was on her way from Inara’s shuttle to her bunk. She’d put on a dress that Wash had given her some years ago and ‘nara coaxed her into taking some captures in it. Also had a girlie heart to heart which wasn’t exactly what she signed up for, but it did feel good getting some things off her chest. Mal was her in essence her best friend, but he was a man.

“You look nice.”

Zoe stopped. As Jayne walked by, she thought she heard him say something with not a drop of sarcasm or a hint of sexual suggestion. Floored and speechless, a small smile crept onto her lips…

He’d done it.