The best five dollars I ever spent by Succatash

TALK STORY

The best five dollars I ever spent

POSTED BY: SUCCATASH
UPDATED: Monday, April 26, 2004 13:59
SHORT URL:
VIEWED: 4137
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Saturday, March 13, 2004 7:49 PM

Wow, what a bargain! Special thanks to Maniac for the tip:

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B0001CYBGQ/qid=107924175
9/br=1-20/ref=br_lf_etk_hg_sp__20//103-3437246-3550259?v=glance&s=kitchen&n=596172

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Monday, March 15, 2004 3:12 PM

SUCCATASH

Lol, am I the only one who thinks this is funny?

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Monday, March 15, 2004 4:12 PM

TEELABROWN

Tash, Tash, Tash. That was...this is being posted, so I'll have to leave this line out...

_____________
"Freedom is the Freedom to say that 2+2 makes 4. If that is granted, all else follws"-Winston, 1984
Teela Brown, keeper of bad typing.
"No one reads these things any way."- Bart on Blackboard

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Monday, March 15, 2004 4:17 PM

SUCCATASH

It's for anyone who has a pain in the neck. I just gave it a 4-star review on Amazon. LOL.

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Monday, March 15, 2004 4:44 PM

CANTTAKESKY

ROFL.

Can't Take My Gorram Sky

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Monday, March 15, 2004 6:35 PM

JRC

Must....stop...laughing...so...hard.....here...at...work....

"Huh"

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Monday, March 15, 2004 7:39 PM

DAVCO92

He he...sounds like a "personal" problem - on several levels. LOL!

Burn the land, boil the sea...

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Monday, March 15, 2004 8:27 PM

11THHOUR

So what happened to the rest of Pinocchio?

11thHour

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Saturday, March 20, 2004 9:13 PM

TMURRIE

Wait wait wait, are they seriously trying to m ake people believe that it's a regular massager thing? Because to me, it looks like a penis and two testicles, it might be just me though. Does anyone else have the same theory as me? I don't want to feel alone on this assumption.

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Saturday, March 20, 2004 9:52 PM

ROCKETJOCK

Ahem.*

"I'll be in my bunk." -- Jayne Cobb

*Footquote: "When correctly viewed, everything is lewd." -- Tom Leher

RocketJock

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Sunday, March 21, 2004 1:44 AM

KALIMEERI

You, sir, have a smutty mind. This is a legitimate ... cough ... invention...
People LOVED those.

Jen dao mei.

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Sunday, March 21, 2004 12:12 PM

LISSA

shiny. just shiny.

~lissa, spwhore

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Tuesday, March 23, 2004 5:36 PM

TEELABROWN

Quote:
Originally posted by epressman617:
To TeelaBrown:
just wondering, but are you familiar with Tom Lehrer?

That's where I got it from. I love Tom Lehrer! Had my new "Tom Lehrer Rivisited" CD, and I couldn't resist.

Tom Lehrer rules!

_____________
"Freedom is the Freedom to say that 2 plus 2 make 4. If that is granted, all else follws"-Winston, 1984
Teela Brown, keeper of bad typing.
"No one reads these things any way."- Bart on Blackboard

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Tuesday, March 23, 2004 5:43 PM

TEELABROWN

Quote:
*Footquote: "When correctly viewed, everything is lewd." -- Tom Leher

"I could tell you things about Peter Pan, and the Wizard of Oz there's a dirty old man!"

I love Tom Lehrer. My sister hates him, and I have no idea why...

_____________
"Freedom is the Freedom to say that 2 plus 2 make 4. If that is granted, all else follws"-Winston, 1984
Teela Brown, keeper of bad typing.
"No one reads these things any way."- Bart on Blackboard

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Wednesday, March 24, 2004 3:47 AM

TEELABROWN

Quote:
Our old mess sergeant's taste buds had been shot off in the war.
But his savory collations add to our esprit de corps.
To think of all the marvelous ways
They're using plastics nowadays.
It makes a fellow proud to be a soldier!

My favorite verse. Actually, the song in general:

Our captain has a handicap to cope with, sad to tell.
He's from Georgia and he doesn't speak the language very well.
He used to be (so rumor has)
The dean of men, at Alcatraz!
It makes a fellow proud to be a soldier!
____________
Ah, but I got it from Agnes
Or maybe it was Sue
Or Millie or Billie or Gillie or Willie,
It doesn't matter who
It might have been at the pub,
Or at the club or in loo,
And if you will be my friend,
Then I might...(Mind you I said "might:)
Give it to you!
_____________
Plagiarize!
Let no one else's work evade your eyes!
Remember why the good lord made your eyes,
So don't shade your eyes,
But plagiarize, plagiarize, plagiarize!
Only be sure always to call it "research:
______________
And when at last the police came by,
Sing rickety-tickety-tin!
And when at last the police came by,
Her little pranks she did not deny.
To do so she would have had to lie,
And lying, she knew, was a sin, a sin,
Lying, she knew, was a sin.

My tragic tale I won't prolong,
Sing rickety-tickety-tin,
My tragic tale I won't prolong,
And if you do not enjoy my song,
You've yourselves to blame if it's to long,
You should have never let me begin, begin,
You should have never let me begin.
______________
So you look at the sixty-fours.

Sixty-four? How did sixty-four get in to it?
I hear you cry. Well, sixty-four is eight squared, don't you see? (Well you ask a silly question, you get a silly answer)
_______________
The Elements always satifys
_______________
Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife,
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor balde of life.
Oh.
But as we go our sorted, sep'rate ways, we will ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.

Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth!
________________
Members of the corps
All hate the thought of war,
They'd rather kill them off by peaceful means.
Stop calling it aggression
We hate that expression!
We only want the world to know,
That we support the status quo,
They love us everywhere we go!
So when in doubt, Send the Marines!
__________________
To end on a happy note, one can always count on Gilbert and Sullivan for a rousing finale, full of words and music and signifying nothing.

That I missed her depressed her young sister named Esther,
This mister to pester she tried.
Now her pestering sister's a festering blister,
You're best to resist her, say I.

The mister resisted, the sister persisted,
I kissed her, all loyalty slipped.
When she said I could have her, her sister's cadaver
Must surely have turned in its crypt.
Yes, yes, yes, yes!

But I love she and she loves me.
Enraptured are the both of we.
Yes I love she and she loves I
And will through all eternity!

See what I mean?
________________
That's all for now. Have fun!

_____________
"Freedom is the Freedom to say that 2 plus 2 make 4. If that is granted, all else follws"-Winston, 1984
Teela Brown, keeper of bad typing.
"No one reads these things any way."- Bart on Blackboard

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Wednesday, March 24, 2004 4:00 AM

TEELABROWN

I also like:

You will all go to your respective Valhallas,
Go directly do not pass go do not collect 200 dollas.

EDIT: and...

And you may have thought it tragic
Not to mention other adjec-
-tives to think of all the weeping they will do
(But don't you worry)

_____________
"Freedom is the Freedom to say that 2 plus 2 make 4. If that is granted, all else follws"-Winston, 1984
Teela Brown, keeper of bad typing.
"No one reads these things any way."- Bart on Blackboard

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Wednesday, March 24, 2004 12:44 PM

TEELABROWN

We should, but oh well. You ever heard L-Y?

You're a secret agent man
Who's after the secret paln.
How do you act so they don't know you're a spy?
(suspiciously)
Normally weak whistle, normally weak whistle, normal L. Y.
____________
So go to the city, see the crazy people there.
Like lambs to the slaughter,
They're drinking the water
And breathing cough...the air!
_____________
You too may be a big hero,
ONce you've learned to count backwards to zero.
"In German, or English, I know how to count down,
Und I'm learning Chinese," says Wernher Von Braun.
_____________
National Brotherhood week. Just so funny.
_____________
At your command
Before you here I stand,
My heart is in my hand...Ech!
_____________
Fight fiercely, Harvard,
fight, fight, fight!
Demonstrate to them our skill.
Albeit they possess the might,
Nonetheless we have the will.
How we shall celebrate our victory,
We shall invite the whole team up for tea
(How jolly!)
Hurl that spheroid down the field, and
Fight, fight, fight!

Fight fiercely, Harvard,
fight, fight, fight!
Impress them with our prowess, do!
Oh, fellows, do not let the crimson down,
Be of stout heart and true.
Come on, chaps, fight for Harvard's glorious name,
Won't it be peachy if we win the game?
(Oh, goody!)
Let's try not to injure them, but
Fight, fight, fight!
And do fight fiercely!
Fight, fight, fight!
_______________

_____________
"Freedom is the Freedom to say that 2 plus 2 make 4. If that is granted, all else follws"-Winston, 1984
Teela Brown, keeper of bad typing.
"No one reads these things any way."- Bart on Blackboard

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 9:51 AM

INEVITABLEBETRAYAL

What a dumbass.

_______________________________________________
I wish I had a magical wish-granting plank.

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Monday, April 26, 2004 1:50 PM

EMBERS

when I went to look at the product I saw that:

Customers who shopped for this item also shopped for this item:
Firefly - The Complete Series DVD

So the DVDs are now linked with something wonderful for those 'hard to reach' places!

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Monday, April 26, 2004 1:58 PM

CALHOUN

LOL, I like the reviewer who says "Its small enough to hold in one hand!"

I always thought bigger was better. Perhaps there is hope for me after all.

Muahahhahaa

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Monday, April 26, 2004 1:59 PM

CALHOUN

I'm only joking.

I'm HUGE!

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