The MRE Tag by manwithpez

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The MRE Tag

POSTED BY: MANWITHPEZ
UPDATED: Wednesday, June 9, 2004 00:25
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Tuesday, June 8, 2004 2:03 PM

Important people don't do field work.

Okay, sorry.

An MRE is a Meal Ready to Eat. Most commonly used by the military to supply meals when meals are not easy to come by.

I know there are people who like them. Quite a few, actually, but I just can't get into it. I think there hideous. They usually come with certain accoutrement such as a dessert (M&Ms...how come I never get that one?) And, they have a heater pack that you add water to to heat up your meal. The downside of the heater pack is that is often times smells of dog poo. Hot dog poo.

They're evil and they'll never ever be any good.

But, that's my opinion. If you know someone in the military, try one.

Then again, don't. Your intestinal tract will thank you.

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Tuesday, June 8, 2004 2:39 PM

DARKJESTER

Was never in the military, but my friends and I used to eat them while backpacking in the Smoky Mountains. They are definately edible, even kinda tasty after 15 miles of hiking, but what people tend to forget is that they have in the range of 1500 calories each. Add the fact that they have a longer shelf life than Twinkies, and you have ...... well, long-lasting high-calorie nutritious food. Much better than going hungry!

MAL "You only gotta scare him."
JAYNE "Pain is scary..."

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Tuesday, June 8, 2004 3:21 PM

JASONZZZ

They sell *very* similar versions of these in disaster survival gear stores. And I agree, try being forced marched for 20 miles and then tear into one of these - nothing like paradise.

BTW, these MREs sure have improved in the last 10 years. They are practically gourmet nowadays. And you don't have to hunt for a hot humvee engine to heat them up. It used be that you have to save all those little bottles of Tobasco or hot sauce packets to kill whatever taste they have in them.

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Tuesday, June 8, 2004 3:27 PM

ZOID

DarkJester and ManWithPez:

I was in the USAF just shy of 14 years. We used to eat them in Saudi Arabia when it was too busy to send a chow run across base. The only one I ever touched was the Beef Stew. Everything else was bizarre but could be choked down, in a pinch.

With the exception of Omelet With Ham. It was pink and moist and spongy, with cubes of purple ham embedded in it. It was like trying to eat a brain. The first and only time I tried to eat it (I was seriously about 12 hours out from my last sit-down meal and 4 hours away from my next), I took one look at it and said, "No way can I eat this." Then my stomach gave me a pinch -- hard -- and said, "Why not just try a little taste." So, I did as my stomach bade, and choked down a bite, trying to play a little game in my mind (you know, 'it's not so bad; it really has an interesting texture'). I tried a second bite, and it got about halfway down my throat and then reversed course...

Luckily, I got my head out the door of the TSW-14 (two TSW-7's welded together), evacuated the Omelet With Ham, and continued working traffic.

The crackers and little packet of peanut butter were always fought over, as a result of the interesting main courses...

You could heat a Beef Stew by placing the packet on the outside ledge of the TSW-14 in the 130-degree sun for about two minutes, massaging the packet and turning it over and leaving it for another two minutes. Steaming hot!

The French had wonderful MREs with a little can of Sterno, a pastry and Chicken Cordon Bleu, for instance. Looking at history, one might come to the conclusion that as a military power, the French have got a knack for surrendering and being subjugated. But they sure do know how to eat in style...

Respectfully,

zoid
_________________________________________________

"Burn the land and boil the sea, you can't take the sky from me." The Ballad of Serenity

Only 317 days, 3 hours, 39 minutes, and 37 seconds left until The BDM!

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Tuesday, June 8, 2004 5:18 PM

MANWITHPEZ

Important people don't do field work.

The Omelette with Ham! That was my first MRE back in 1993 when I joined the Air Force. We had that one day when we went to shoot the M-16, ad we couldn't get back to the chow hall. There were no heaters in that MRE, and the TI came through and took all the gum and candy and matches and tobasco sauce that came in it. Salt and pepper...that was what you could have. You could keep the Kool Aid, but you didn't have any way to mix it, so you emptied some of the powder into your mouth and drank from your canteen, swished, and it was passable. But, omelette with ham may be the reason I simply can't stand the things. But, they made us eat the whole thing. It was horrible, and has gone down in my mind as the single worst meal I've ever been forced to eat.

Every MRE I've tried since then only conjures up memories of that one, and I just can't. I just can't. I try to take a bite of one, and the taste and smell hits me at once, and I retch, and that's it. Game over. Then, I take the gum out of the pack ,and chew that, ad pretend that it never happened.

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Tuesday, June 8, 2004 5:49 PM

JASONZZZ

Well... Can't blame you guys in the Air Force, you guys actually have better than decent meals to look forward to all the time when you have hots.

The chow in the Army messhall is maybe only a grade over MREs when heated, not a whole lot to look forward to - might as well choke down another PBJ and forget about the entire thing.

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Tuesday, June 8, 2004 7:16 PM

RKLENSETH

Do they still make 'shit on a shingle' in the military these days?

Oh, and play Cantr II at www.cantr.net.

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Tuesday, June 8, 2004 9:04 PM

JASONZZZ

Are you kidding me? It's the breakfast of the champions. That, a bowl of syrup, eggs over easy, and Tobasco all stirred together goes a long long way.

Quote:
Originally posted by rklenseth:
Do they still make 'shit on a shingle' in the military these days?

Oh, and play Cantr II at www.cantr.net.

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Wednesday, June 9, 2004 12:25 AM

DRAKON

Quote:
Originally posted by Jasonzzz:
nothing like paradise.

Okay, is this a compliment, or the opposite?

"Wash, where is my damn spaceship?"

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