REAL WORLD EVENT DISCUSSIONS

Rape that Bitch: Online Gaming Abuse

POSTED BY: MAGONSDAUGHTER
UPDATED: Thursday, July 5, 2012 12:09
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Sunday, July 1, 2012 5:47 PM

MAGONSDAUGHTER


I don't play online games, but my hubby does. Anyone else had the experience of the constant sexually abusive language that has become common place in this world?

Quote:

Sexual harassment is rife in the world of online video gaming. While video games are often thought of as a male pursuit, an increasing number of women are playing them. Having entered a domain that was once dominated by men, female gamers are being met by abuse.

“F-----g dumb bitch. I hope a f-----g n----r rapes you and f-----g kills you and your family.”

These are the words Jenny Haniver hears while playing a video game online. Her male opponent shouts them at her. It’s only a game, but he sounds like he means it.

It’s the worst tirade of abuse Jenny has received while playing video games online, but it’s not an isolated incident. The 23-year-old student goes online almost every night to play the popular multiplayer combat-based game Call of Duty: Modern Warfare, where gamers communicate via headsets.
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A girl uses an Xbox to play a game.

A girl uses an Xbox to play a game. Photo: Jenny Haniver

Haniver is part of a growing number of women who enjoy gaming online. According to a US-based study by the Entertainment Software Association, 42 per cent of gamers are now female.

Every time Haniver plays, she is harassed because of her gender. Men call her bitch, slut and whore. They tell her that she has no right to be playing video games because she’s a woman. And sometimes, they even threaten to rape and kill her.

Alarmed at the level of abuse she was receiving, Haniver created a website called Not in the Kitchen Anymore to document her experiences. She posts screen grabs and audio files of the harassment she encounters.
Jenny Haniver, the creator of the website Not in the Kitchen Anymore.

Jenny Haniver, the creator of the website Not in the Kitchen Anymore.

A similar website, Fat, Ugly or Slutty, also chronicles the abuse female gamers are subjected to. When I speak to the site’s co-founder, Grace, she reads me the latest submission: “F--- you bitch, f--- I will rape you in the pussy, f--- you”.

It’s not just websites like Fat, Ugly or Slutty that are drawing attention to the treatment of women in online gaming. A series of recent incidents has also intensified the debate surrounding the issue.

A few weeks ago, the executive producer of a new Tomb Raider reboot, Ron Rosenberg, announced that a pack of scavengers will try to rape heroine Lara Croft during a scene in the new game. Rosenberg’s comments reignited a debate about whether the prevalence of sexualised violence in video games is to blame for the gaming world's problem with sexual harassment.
Grace from the website Fat, Ugly or Slutty.

Grace from the website Fat, Ugly or Slutty. Photo: James Fletcher, BBC

Around the same time, pop culture critic Anita Sarkeesian launched a Kickstarter campaign to raise funds for a feminist video series on the portrayal of women in gaming. While Sarkeesian has already raised more than $US158,000, she has also received a large number of venomous comments on her YouTube channel, which include threats of sexual assault.

In February, another female member of the gaming community was condemned for expressing her views. Gaming writer Jennifer Hepler was attacked on Twitter and in online forums after she was quoted on the social news site Reddit proposing that games could be improved if players had the option of skipping combat sections. Many of the criticisms levelled against Hepler concentrated on her gender.

Not long after Hepler was abused, the world’s first online gaming reality show, Cross Assault, sparked outrage when one of its male stars defended the use of the word “rape” and the phrase “rape that bitch” while gaming.
Gamer girl Maude Garrett says sexual harassment is "almost a norm" in gaming.

Gamer girl Maude Garrett says sexual harassment is "almost a norm" in gaming.

“There’s nothing unacceptable about that,” stated player Aris Bakhtanians during a live broadcast.

The competitive gamer also claimed that “sexual harassment is part of the culture” of combat-based games.

Bakhtanians issued an apology, but the Cross Assault incident lead to a heated debate within the gaming community about whether the abuse women face is unacceptable or simply a legitimate form of the “trash talking” that occurs between players during online fighting games.
“I try to stay under the radar,” says Rebecca Oakley, who hides her gender while gaming.

“I try to stay under the radar,” says Rebecca Oakley, who hides her gender while gaming.

“Trash talking is a part of gaming,” admits Haniver.

“But when you start attacking people based on their gender, that’s a line that should not be crossed because that has literally nothing to do with their ability to game.”

Gender-focused abuse is so common in the gaming world that many women have come to expect it.

To Maude Garrett, who hosts 2DayFM’s gaming segment, Geek Speak, sexual harassment is “almost a norm” in the gaming world.

Garrett can’t count the amount of times she’s been told to “get back in the kitchen” while gaming online.

Though sexual harassment in gaming is widespread, not all women experience it. But that has less to do with the frequency of abuse and more to do with the way women identify themselves online.

According to Grace, many women disguise their gender to avoid being targeted. They tend to choose androgynous screen names, play as male characters, and even avoid speaking so their voice won’t give them away.

This practice is known as “hiding”, says Grace.

It’s a form of camouflaging that long-time gamer Rebecca Oakley knows all about.

“I try to stay under the radar,” says the 36-year old Melbourne mother.

“I’ve seen people say, ‘I’m a girl’ and the abuse that gets hurled at them from ‘get back in the kitchen’ to ‘f---- off, girls don’t play video games’ is just incredible.”

Hiding is one of many techniques female gamers employ to deal with abuse.

Another, cited by many gamers Fairfax Media spoke to, is adapting to the gaming world by “toughening up”.

“You have to develop a bit of a thick skin when you start playing online,” says 23-year-old Melbourne student and avid gamer Katie Laczko.

If a male player’s comments are particularly offensive, female players can leave the game they are in and join another.

According to Haniver, this approach isn’t always successful, with some men chasing women from one game to another in a virtual cat and mouse game.

“There are some people who follow you from game to game all night, for no other reason except that they are stalking you for fun,” says Haniver.

“There are also people who will send you messages harassing you hours after you play with them.”

When avoiding an abusive player fails, women can report a player and try to have them banned. But many gamers recount how ineffectual this complaint system can be.

According to Oakley, “you’ll only get a stock standard ‘we take your report very seriously and can’t advise you of the action, but blah blah blah, rest assured, we will be looking into this petition’”.

If a gamer does manage to have an offensive player’s account banned, that player can always open a new account and begin abusing them once more.

For some women, the sexual harassment they experience while gaming is too much to bear.

“A lot of people have said they have stopped playing online games, they will just play single player games,” says Grace.

Laczko recalls a friend who was very active in the gaming community, until the harassment wore her down.

“She couldn’t handle the abuse that was being thrown at her, “ says Laczko.

“Unfortunately, she actually suffered a lot.”

It’s not just women who are turning away from gaming because of the prevalence of sexual harassment.

Long-time gamer and editor of CNET Seamus Byrne says he feels ashamed of the way some of his fellow male gamers are treating women online.

“I quite regularly think about whether I want to be defined as a gamer when these are the kind of people who seem to be getting all the attention for what gaming is supposed to be,” says Byrne.

While many agree that the gaming world has a problem with sexual harassment, there is a debate about what, if anything, can be done about it.

Haniver thinks a change in attitudes is in order. Even though an increasing number of women are gaming, she is still met by surprise when male gamers hear her voice and realise they are playing with a woman. Haniver believes that when men begin to realise that female gamers are common, they will be less shocked when they encounter them and less likely to respond in a negative manner.

Others aren’t so hopeful. Oakley believes that the situation for women in gaming will never improve. To her, the sexual harassment female gamers encounter is an unavoidable consequence of the anonymity of online gaming. In such an environment, she argues, people think they can get away with anything.

Known as the Online Disinhibition Effect, this is an oft-quoted theory that has been applied to all manner of online interactions.

To Grace, anonymity is only part of the picture of what’s happening in gaming.

“People think it’s about anonymity and so they think the problem is too large to try to solve,” she says.

“If you start thinking about it in terms of consequences on an account, it starts to feel like a smaller problem that we can start working on.”

As a programmer, Grace believes there are many changes that gaming companies can make to combat harassment.

In April, she contributed to an episode of online video series Extra Credits, which canvassed consequence-based initiatives that gaming companies could introduce to deter their players from harassing others. These included the idea that if 80 per cent of a player’s messages are ignored, that player should lose the right to message anyone besides their friends.

As part of the episode, Extra Credits launched a campaign targeting Microsoft's Xbox Live online gaming platform and challenging Micrsoft to act. In May, Extra Credits writer James Portnow was invited to meet with Microsoft to discuss how the ideas suggested in the episode could be realized.

While none of the ideas proposed on Extra Credits have been put into practice yet, Grace believes the meeting with Microsoft was a positive step forward.

“If we can start realising that there are systems out there that can even make a small dent, then that’s better than what we have,” she says.

Even minor changes will make a difference for female gamers, who want to continue playing the games they love without being harassed because of their gender.



Read more: http://www.theage.com.au/digital-life/games/its-a-mans-virtual-world-2
0120627-211du.html#ixzz1zQv97Xb3


I've seen a number of posters here, past and present, also descend to this kind of behaviour.

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Sunday, July 1, 2012 6:24 PM

WISHIMAY


Quote:

Originally posted by Magonsdaughter:
I don't play online games, but my hubby does. Anyone else had the experience of the constant sexually abusive language that has become common place in this world?

I've seen a number of posters here, past and present, also descend to this kind of behaviour.



You have no idea. Hubbs is a coal miner, right? He comes home every know and then and is in a rage... Why? He has spent the night working with an idiot that's only form of entertainment is making over tho top graffic gay jokes, things I could not repeat... THE WHOLE EIGHT HOURS. And he said he can't say anything because then they make the jokes personal. Wearing ear plugs gets you killed, too.

The guys here are angels compared to what he goes through. We all get mad, and I have only a vague idea what testosterone adds to the mix, but I do know from research that it is significant as far as those kinds of verbal attacks go. They'll do it to each other and think nothing of it, and as amped as I have seen guys get when they lose those games, to some of them losing to a women is unacceptable... Have seen a half dozen kids be assaulted and killed for interfering with a gaming session. Have seen a half dozen women let their babies starve while gaming incessantly.
Remember, we have only achieved the illusion of civility half of the time. It's pretty ugly underneath the illusion still.

Seems to me the only winning move is NOT TO PLAY!

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Sunday, July 1, 2012 7:40 PM

MAGONSDAUGHTER


One of the reasons I don't play, other than the sheer waste of time, which I come here to do ;)

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Sunday, July 1, 2012 9:15 PM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


Hello,

In my experience, online social events (especially games) are rife with abuse. If you participate in the chat aspect of the games, it will be noticed that the abuse is nearly constant and often of the vilest sort. I do not have the experience of being a woman, but I can tell you that I've had remarks very similar to those mentioned in the article directed at ME.

I wish online gaming was less vulgar.

I wish fewer of the comments involved suggestion of sexual violence or even sex in general. I prefer to think of sex as a lovely way to share affection, and not a means to hurt someone.

This sort of behavior will continue until someone figures out how to make money by curbing it. I'm not sure if that will ever happen.

The alternative is to play with people you know and trust and block out communication from anyone else. That's what I do most of the time.

--Anthony


Note to Self:
Raptor - woman testifying about birth control is a slut (the term fits.)
Six - Wow, isn't Niki quite the CUNT? And, yes, I spell that in all caps....
Wulf - Niki is a stupid fucking bitch who should hurry up and die.

“The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.” -Thomas Szasz

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Monday, July 2, 2012 2:07 AM

M52NICKERSON

DALEK!


The only way it is going to improve is if the game industry gets involved and sets rules of conduct and inforces those rules. It's simple, threaten to rape someone, or insult them based on gender and you get the ban hammer.

I do not fear God, I fear the ignorance of man.

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Monday, July 2, 2012 2:08 AM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)


I don't really do online gaming, save some server racing on Gran Turismo, where I haven't really noticed much graphic sexual threats during races.

What I was reminded of by this story was the Grand Theft Auto series, where you can pick up hookers, take 'em someplace "safe" in your car, do your business, then when she gets out to leave, you can kill her and get your money back. Yeah, that's in the game.



"I supported Bush in 2000 and 2004 and intellegence [sic] had very little to do with that decision." - Hero


"I've not watched the video either, or am incapable of intellectually dealing with the substance of this thread, so I'll instead act like a juvenile and claim victory..." - Rappy

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Monday, July 2, 2012 2:16 AM

M52NICKERSON

DALEK!


Quote:

Originally posted by Kwicko:
What I was reminded of by this story was the Grand Theft Auto series, where you can pick up hookers, take 'em someplace "safe" in your car, do your business, then when she gets out to leave, you can kill her and get your money back. Yeah, that's in the game.



Far better to max out your pimping level and than the hookers pay you to have sex with them. Yes that is in the game also.

I do not fear God, I fear the ignorance of man.

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Monday, July 2, 2012 8:02 AM

RIONAEIRE

Beir bua agus beannacht


I don't play online games, but if circumstances were different I would probably do so. I don't understand why anyone would want to talk to each other like that, anenimity or not, that's really cruel. And yes I've seen it happen here too occasionally. Insulting is one thing, but insulting like that is another entirely. I don't understand that mentality.

I guess the only thing is to dish back, ignore or maybe have penalties in the game for treating others like that?

I have Kathy Bates on speed dial, mwa ha ha ha (in exaggeratedly evil voice)

"A completely coherant River means writers don't deliver" KatTaya.

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Monday, July 2, 2012 11:40 AM

BYTEMITE


FPS are a guy haven, so that's really not that surprising. I can't play them anyway because all of them make me motion sick.

I see a little of it still in online RPG, but it's really more normal levels of internet GIFT than the kind of outright aggression the FPS see. I suppose that RTS might also have some of this.

Basically wherever you see some serious anonymous player v. player competition you're going to see abuse and ugly language about their race, sex, orientation, or creed. It's not really just women.

I get a kick out of pretending to be a gay guy sometimes just to see how awful they get.

Quote:

Rosenberg’s comments reignited a debate about whether the prevalence of sexualised violence in video games is to blame for the gaming world's problem with sexual harassment.


That's... No. It's because of GIFT and rejected nerd rage. :/

Quote:

“People think it’s about anonymity and so they think the problem is too large to try to solve,” she says.


Again, they're dismissing what is in fact the correct answer because they're glossing over the fact that it happens to every minority group. It's GIFT and trolling, pretty simple. Why else would GIFTs do this to each other, as the article correctly points out?

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Monday, July 2, 2012 11:53 AM

BYTEMITE


Quote:

Have seen a half dozen kids be assaulted and killed for interfering with a gaming session. Have seen a half dozen women let their babies starve while gaming incessantly.
Remember, we have only achieved the illusion of civility half of the time. It's pretty ugly underneath the illusion still.

Seems to me the only winning move is NOT TO PLAY!



?

That really isn't the most common experience. Also, condemning an entire artistic medium for the actions of a few... Or even a LOT... That would be like saying the whole internet is bad, let's shut this baby down.

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Monday, July 2, 2012 12:23 PM

WISHIMAY


What I'm trying to say is gaming is addictive, rediculously so, and giving examples why. I don't think doing things that are addictive-and especially the things they want you to do in games- will make you any better a person.
Some people say that relieves stress, but it seems a lot that they create more stress in the not having and the money and maintaining than they relieve it. I've personally seen several people divorce OVER A STUPID GAME, because the game became waaay more important than any person, or even personal hygene
I personally feel more stable when I don't do things that are addictive(save for this ), and am more productive. Hubbs is calmer and more rational when he avoids things that make him obsess ( he used to smoke two packs a day, drink constantly, and play games 4-5 hrs a day.) He still has froot loop days like we all do, but compared to how he was a decade ago... totally better better human being in sooo many ways...
I think some people can limit themselves and still TCofB...
I think people that can't limit themselves should do it professionally or not go near the things...

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Monday, July 2, 2012 12:32 PM

BYTEMITE


Quote:

and especially the things they want you to do in games- will make you any better a person.


I know, for a fact, that video games have helped me understand issues of morality better. As such they have decidedly made me a better person.

Quote:

Some people can limit themselves and still TCofB...
People that can't limit themselves should do it professionally or not go near the things...



That is not for you or any of us to decide. If someone is addicted, all we can do is help them. People must make their own choices, and yes, face the consequences for those choices.

Video games have some very important artistic and cultural values alongside what negatives also exist. I can't really join in on roundly denouncing them.

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Monday, July 2, 2012 12:55 PM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


Hello,

I think people often confuse people prone to addiction with the things they get addicted to. People who get addicted to video games, or candy, or porn, or whatnot... these are people with issues. I don't think these activities are inherently addictive. I think there are addiction prone people who latch onto these various things. Anything that provides any pleasure whatsoever can become the focus for an addictive personality.

--Anthony



Note to Self:
Raptor - woman testifying about birth control is a slut (the term fits.)
Six - Wow, isn't Niki quite the CUNT? And, yes, I spell that in all caps....
Wulf - Niki is a stupid fucking bitch who should hurry up and die.

“The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.” -Thomas Szasz

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Monday, July 2, 2012 4:29 PM

WISHIMAY


Quote:

Originally posted by BYTEMITE:

1..... As such they have decidedly made me a better person.

2.....That is not for you or any of us to decide. If someone is addicted, all we can do is help them. People must make their own choices, and yes, face the consequences for those choices.



1. Such AS??? You logic us to death, but you provide no examples??!! Not lettin you slide either, missy

2. I ain't tellin others what to do, I'm giving my opinion on the subject.
I did not say HEY YOU, PUT DOWN THE CONTROLLER AND STEP AWAY FROM THE ADULT DIAPER! I'm pretty sure there was an "I think" in there somewhere...uh...wasn't there?

I haven't even given my most compelling argument yet...When my kid was a little over a year old and I left for 15 minutes to go vacuum out our car, leaving my husband in charge.... guess what he was doing while she went in the bathroom and climed up on the counter and was guzzling color-safe bleach??? Yeah. Playin' video games....She coulda died 'cause of a GAME. It only took one ride to the hospital with her puking all over the back seat for him to get it...So you could say I intimately understand what a video game is worth in this house, NADA!


(p.s. Thank you to the color safe bleach people for putting buffers in it that make kids puke, GREAT IDEA!)

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Monday, July 2, 2012 5:00 PM

BYTEMITE


Quote:

1. Such AS??? You logic us to death, but you provide no examples??!


I'm not sure since when personal anecdotes qualify as a logical argument, I was making conversation there with my own personal experiences. Normally I'd think people would take me at face value when I discuss my life. You believe I have some reason to lie?

Video games actually taught me the grey side to morality. That even the people I'd think are evil have people that care about them, and that to kill them would make me a murderer. I could have learned the opposite, some of the earlier games are very black and white, but in more modern times, not so. Storylines have become complicated. And even in the earlier games, the ones I played you never really killed the villain, you sealed them away, or broke their doomsday machine, or redeemed them. It was a more idealistic, optimistic time. I carry some of that with me still, a little candle in the dark that this world hasn't yet smothered.

Quote:

Yeah. Playin' video games....She coulda died 'cause of a GAME.


Could have been talking on the phone, could have been watching television, could have been reading a book. Coulda coulda coulda. There are many children that die every day because the parent happens to look away for a short while, children who drown in a pool after they fall in, or into the rivers around here during flood season. No parent is perfect. And yet, to blame an inanimate object for a lapse of responsibility, well, that's not getting at the root of the issue. Things happen. That's life.

I had a much beloved cat who died because I went away on vacation to Europe, and we had someone feeding her, but she was too afraid to eat. She was a big cat, and it turns out it's not all that safe for them to burn off their fat reserves, it wrecks their liver. So we come back, for a few weeks, don't notice anything wrong apart from she's lost some weight. Then, all of a sudden, one day her skin has turned this kind of yellowish colour, and she would just lay around, limp and staring, no energy. We took her to a vet, who recommended this high energy food that we had to force feed her, which was a terrible feeling in of itself. And she died anyway. And to this day I don't know if we misheard how much to feed her every day, if we went too long between feedings, if when one time she tried to hide from me when I had to feed her if I was too rough pulling her out, if I wasn't paying enough attention to her (playing video games even), if she was already too far gone to save.

I know a cat isn't anything like a kid... but I think your anger at video games is misplaced.

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Monday, July 2, 2012 5:23 PM

WISHIMAY


Quote:

Originally posted by BYTEMITE:

1....And even in the earlier games, the ones I played you never really killed the villain, you sealed them away, or broke their doomsday machine, or redeemed them. It was a more idealistic, optimistic time. I carry some of that with me still, a little candle in the dark that this world hasn't yet smothered.


2......I know a cat isn't anything like a kid... but I think your anger at video games is misplaced.



1. I blame Disney for your morals, not video games....

2. Video games are much much harder to put down, especially for an obsessive. The game keeps moving when you don't and if you don't pick it up there are sanctions of death or points... The damn things guarantee people with mental problem especially will have a very hard or even impossible time putting them down... Is that their problem, maybe. Maybe it's like allowing a person with Prader-Wille in a Ponderosa and letting them eat themselves to death, or giving a shopaholic instant credit cards... Casino's have to kick people out that are compulsive gamblers, Maybe if the vid companies were ethical they would put warnings on their products for obsessives, like cancer warnings on cigs... But since we know they would rather you kill fake people in the street, I doubt they are concerned with a few actual kids getting stomped on...

Maybe it ain't their problem, then again.....

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Monday, July 2, 2012 5:27 PM

BYTEMITE


Quote:

But since we know they would rather you kill fake people in the street, I doubt they are concerned with a few actual kids getting stomped on...


Oh what the HELL.

I'm ALL about killing the kids aren't I! Oh mi gosh, let's shoot up a motherfucking school, ALL OVER THAT Shit! While we're at it we can strangle my cat so I can bury another one!

The problem isn't the games, or the game companies, any more than Catcher in the fucking Rye was to blame for John Lennon's death, or Van Gogh's art was to blame for him putting a bullet through his head. The problem is the goddamn PEOPLE. Your life and your problems and your failings are YOUR responsibility, no one else. Certainly not the fault of inanimate objects or fantasy worlds posing as ART!

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Monday, July 2, 2012 5:28 PM

MAL4PREZ


Is anyone else seeing the Southpark WoW episode? Brilliant!

My solution, if I didn't already have too many addictions to feed, would be to get really fucking good at video games, kill the zitty dickhead guys, then mock them with my gender. OK, easier said then done. But that's the only way it will really get fixed, and I could do it if I had a year or two to get up to speed. (It's been a while, but at one point I was somewhat dangerous at DOOM and Starcraft. Yeah. I've dated myself.)

Hey, I have no problem with booting bad-language users from group play, if fact I'm very much for it. But that's not a permanent change. Some hotshot chickies need to go in there take down the assholes, then crow about it. It'll happen eventually. The younger generation of women is not, as I've seen, completely ground-breaking (there seems to be a disturbing trend toward anti-feminism, ie "I just want a man to coddle and support me and dress me in silks and diamonds tee-hee!" but there are also kick ass girls, grrls as we called them in my day. They'll open new paths. They'll pull an online Buffy take-down or two and things will change.

I'm going to geekgirlcon this summer. I'll see what comes up.

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Monday, July 2, 2012 6:43 PM

WISHIMAY


Quote:

Originally posted by BYTEMITE:

Oh what the HELL. (blah blah, something about strangling a cat??)



Your life and your problems and your failings are YOUR responsibility, no one else.



And now you know my superpower! My morality/legality arguments make people want to kill things I have just achieved in two hours what the Blue Sun People couldn't do in a season and a movie, muh hahahahahahhhaaaa!

Of course what you do is your responsibility. Half of my argument is from a devil's advocate/legality issue, the other half is... I don't like the things.. They stopped being relaxing for me years ago. Once you don't play them anymore it's like you look around and see half the population is addicted to them like a narcotic and it's very creepy.

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Monday, July 2, 2012 7:10 PM

BYTEMITE


Quote:

I have just achieved in two hours what the Blue Sun People couldn't do in a season and a movie, muh hahahahahahhhaaaa!



Need I remind you that I am ALWAYS angry? But yes, you managed to make me slightly more angry than usual with your arguments. Well done. You must be proud to be among the elite consisting of oh fuck every single person here who has at one point triggered the rage.

Quote:

Once you don't play them anymore it's like you look around and see half the population is addicted to them like a narcotic and it's very creepy.


You have an inaccurate estimate of the numbers due to your participation in geek culture. Video games are not the only mindless timesink out there, one of which I know of is far more ubiquitous and even less productive in a person bettering themselves.

Accusing people who make or play video games of murderous tendencies is, as you know, just going plain overboard. But even with as little as I like television, I'm not about to start blaming KILLING SPREES on tv series. That's just silly. The person responsible for a killing spree is the person that DID IT.

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Monday, July 2, 2012 7:13 PM

CATPIRATE


MD, why get so emotional on negro ghetto talk. Liberals should rejoice in the ghetto culture how much they bring to society. It's a cultural thing they just look, smell, and talk different.

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Monday, July 2, 2012 8:02 PM

WISHIMAY


Quote:

Originally posted by CATPIRATE:
MD, why get so emotional on negro ghetto talk. Liberals should rejoice in the ghetto culture how much they bring to society. It's a cultural thing they just look, smell, and talk different.



NEGROS? Whites don't cuss and have never initiated cursing, heh??


GO TO THE BACK OF THE BUS, GENIUS!!!

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Monday, July 2, 2012 8:12 PM

RIONAEIRE

Beir bua agus beannacht


What I don't understand is why people get so worked up that they would talk to each other like that. I am occasionally not as kind as I would like to be, but my worst offenses, slight patronization (which is no big deal really) and dishing back and disagreeing and being honest about how I feel don't compare to the stuff that the article talks about. Why would someone say that stuff to someone?

I have Kathy Bates on speed dial, mwa ha ha ha (in exaggeratedly evil voice)

"A completely coherant River means writers don't deliver" KatTaya.

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Tuesday, July 3, 2012 1:49 AM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


Hello,

I think when you remove the consequences for bad behavior, you see it come out in certain people. Outside of video games, this is visible in the comments to news stories online. Or even here on the forum, although at least in a forum where you want to regularly participate, some people feel a certain degree of social pressure to behave half-way decently.

But in games and anonymous comment areas there is much less incentive to behave well, in part because of the constant stream of nameless people who are always parading past, making it feel like there is no lasting consequence to any behavior whatsoever.

It would be an interesting psychological study to see what types of people devolve into foul-mouthed buffoons online, in the absence of a community, and which types maintain decorum anyway.

--Anthony

P.S. Byte, it is easier to blame a game for something terrible than to blame a person or random chance. Blaming random chance is unsatisfactory and blaming a person could have consequences within the group. Blaming the game is satisfactory in that it gives you a specific focus and doesn't ruin your real-life relationships.





Note to Self:
Raptor - woman testifying about birth control is a slut (the term fits.)
Six - Wow, isn't Niki quite the CUNT? And, yes, I spell that in all caps....
Wulf - Niki is a stupid fucking bitch who should hurry up and die.

“The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.” -Thomas Szasz

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Tuesday, July 3, 2012 3:17 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Haha...

If you've ever worked an overnight job in the last few years, you'll recognize the same speech patterns. Hell... look at the mistakes I regret I've made in the RWED in the last few weeks.

It's funny what people will say or do when they're convinced nobody is watching them.

I don't play online games, but I know exactly what you're talking about MD.


Take my shift for example. After the first night, I kind of dreaded going back. There was a ton of shit-talking back and forth... it felt like high-school gym-class. I was always athletic and excelled at wrestling and basketball, but having to listen to the trash-talk always threw me off my game because I wasn't raised to speak that way (in person, mind you). As it turns out, this only happens when one guy is on shift. Everyone else is actually really cool when he's not around.

It's totally weird how one guy on the clock can entirely change the chemistry and dynamic of a shift. I think that deep down, he's actually not a bad guy. His old man died when he was very young and I'm sure in the neighborhood he grew up in life wasn't easy.

As it is, I just stay out of his way come break time/lunch time when he does his Chris Rock bit. He really is funny, but I know if he starts turning it my way I won't think so, and I don't know what would happen then. It's better for the both of us if I give him a wide enough birth for his hostility and toilet mouth when we're not working. He's got plenty of co-workers who seem to take his BS trash talk that I won't be a target of it.

When we're working together though it's cool. I sweat so much my shirt needs wringing out when I leave work. He works pretty damn hard too. He doesn't seem to give any crap to people who help us meet the nightly quota. As long as I'm helping make the team look good when he works, he's cool. I'm cool with that. It's a low stress job that seriously fly's by, and I want to keep it that way.



I'd like to think that nobody trash-talks me on nights when I'm not working, but there's nothing I can do about that if they do. The big break-time pow-wow tonight had the theme of "people who shit-talk others when they're not there to defend themselves are bitches", since several guys constantly bad wrap the boss to everyone.

Unlike here, I'm pretty quiet at work. If there's any talk about me behind my back, I don't think it's evolved to shit-talk. I don't think anyone has figured me out in the least yet.




Bottom line.....

I won't judge anybody for going to the "authorities" and ratting people out for "bad behavior". It's, admittedly, probably better than the solution I'd come up with when the top of the volcano blew off my mountain.

Personally, I can't rat people out though. I just tend to avoid places or situations which would regularly trigger my "fight or flight" mechanisms.




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Tuesday, July 3, 2012 2:01 PM

RIONAEIRE

Beir bua agus beannacht


That's interesting that you feel blaming something is easier than blaming random chance Anthony. In my life it is sooooooooo much easier to blame random chance, say that things aren't anyone's fault, they just happened the way they did and no one is to blame. This is how I get through life. So blaming random chance, to me, seems best sometimes.

And I agree with Byte it could have been anything to occupy one while the child gets into a tight spot. Blaming things doesn't seem utterly accurate to me unless those things are more directly causal. For instance if someone is high on meth you can blame the meth, since I think we all agree that meth is bad and has no redeeming value.

I have Kathy Bates on speed dial, mwa ha ha ha (in exaggeratedly evil voice)

"A completely coherant River means writers don't deliver" KatTaya.

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Tuesday, July 3, 2012 4:48 PM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


Hello,

But blaming meth is again blaming a thing instead of a person.

I think people have an intrinsic need to focus the blame for incidents on an item, individual, or class of items or individuals. I'm glad you do not, Riona, because it's not productive. But I do think it's human nature.

Some people blame God, drugs, video games, jews, or any number of other factors.

What or who you blame I think has a lot to do with what you are comfortable with in your circumstances. If I endanger my child because I am occupied with a drug or video game, it can be tempting to blame the drug or video game instead of me if we are in a relationship.

--Anthony




Note to Self:
Raptor - woman testifying about birth control is a slut (the term fits.)
Six - Wow, isn't Niki quite the CUNT? And, yes, I spell that in all caps....
Wulf - Niki is a stupid fucking bitch who should hurry up and die.

“The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.” -Thomas Szasz

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Thursday, July 5, 2012 12:09 PM

RIONAEIRE

Beir bua agus beannacht


Well I guess I do blame things sometimes, but I don't think I do it as much as the general populus. But its true that the meth addict got themselves into that mess and so technically they are the one to blame.

I have Kathy Bates on speed dial, mwa ha ha ha (in exaggeratedly evil voice)

"A completely coherant River means writers don't deliver" KatTaya.

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