Semi-triumphant return of CAPTION 2 TIGHTPANTS #7!!! by TenthCrewMember

GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Semi-triumphant return of CAPTION 2 TIGHTPANTS #7!!!

POSTED BY: TENTHCREWMEMBER
UPDATED: Tuesday, December 27, 2005 16:52
SHORT URL:
VIEWED: 8381
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Sunday, December 18, 2005 6:05 AM

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Back with a vengeance! Okay, so not really. My Firefly is still limping to drydock for repairs (gorram motherboard was shot too...) and so since I can't go any longer without my C2T, it's back, even if it lacks some of the standard flash...

Now then, here is the last winner from C2T#6, a hi-larious entry, now sitting rightfully in the halls of Caption Tightpants greatness, from JETFLAIR!

MAL: Like I already told you, officer, the reavers ate my license and registration.

I love it! Now back to BDC (big damn captioning!)...

Jayne: Gorrammit! There's a line!
Wash: I told you we should gone to Burger Sun, not McReavers.
Jayne: Just make sure you get my Filet O' Flesh Sandwich with cheese.
Mal: It's gettin' awfully crowded in my sky...

Shiny! Now you give me yer ruttin' best!

P.S. After this weeks winner, in honor of the BDM DVD release and the holidays, I am gonna give away some shinys from my CafePress store again. 1 lucky person will get their choice of any one item! This will be open to everyone who has ever played Caption Tightpants or Caption 2 Tightpants, the only catch is [PARLIAMENTARY AUTHORIZATION REQUIRED]

BWAH!
TCM

The BIG DAMN LINK to more shiny CAPTION TIGHTPANTSES... TIGHTPANTSUM... TIGHTPANTSI...
oh just go check 'em out!
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=9360
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Avail yourself of my trade! I have original (meaning: designed by me!) T-shirts, posters, mugs and more at http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew
*Download my Firefly Games for FREE at http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=13&t=12622
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In or near Ohio? Join us!
http://p097.ezboard.com/bohiofireflyfans
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 7:34 AM

SERYN

Wash - anyone sees a parking spot, shout out
Jayne - we should've come earlier, all the good banks'll've been robbed already *sulks*
Mal - well if you'd got out of your bunk sooner...
Wash - will you two pipe down! Am I gonna have to turn this ship around?

well, kinda lame, but anyone who's ever gone to a theme park will be strangely comforted

-------------------------------------------
'She's a mite whimsical in the brainpan.' - Mal

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 8:11 AM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

A sign that reads:

WELCOME TO MIRANDA
Pop: If you can read this,
you are the population

BWAH!
TCM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Avail yourself of my trade! I have original (meaning: designed by me!) T-shirts, posters, mugs and more at http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew
*Download my Firefly Games for FREE at http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=13&t=12622
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In or near Ohio? Join us!
http://p097.ezboard.com/bohiofireflyfans
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 8:43 AM

ALAND

RIVER: Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?
WASH (to ZOE): See, this is why we're not having kids.

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 8:50 AM

THEREALME

Mal: Wash, do you mean to tell me that you entered my ship into a demolition derby!?

TheRealMe, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 9:50 AM

RAT

Mal: Well, if they follow standard Alliance procedure, they'll dump their garbage before they go to light-speed, then we just float away.

Acquisitions Officer - SereniTREE

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 10:26 AM

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE

MAL:"I thought Jayne's calm was being damaged, but this is just too much..."

OR

KAYLEE:"How many reavers are there?"

JAYNE:"Lots."

OR

KAYLEE:"Now THAT'S luh-suh..."

OR

SIMON:"That's a big pile of...ships"

OR

The futuristic equivalent of "Drive-in Movies"

OR

MAL:"Gorramit, all the good spots are taken. And no, Wash, we are not parking beside the Johnson's. Exchanged a few unkindly words last time we met..."

/\/\/\/\/\/

MORE TO COME

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Creator of "THE OTHER SHINY CAPTION GAME"!
www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01
Time for some thrilling heroics!
poor_noel2@hotmail.com

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 10:30 AM

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE

An altered version of my last one:

MAL:"No Wash, i don't want to park beside the Johnson's. Don't get me wrong, they're a great bunch, but i frankly can't stand their Aunt Ester. she's a greaqt gal...but once you get her going....how can i put this lightly....my ears bleed?"

OR

The crew of Serenity meet Jayne's eclectic set of relatives and In-laws.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Creator of "THE OTHER SHINY CAPTION GAME"!
www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01
Time for some thrilling heroics!
poor_noel2@hotmail.com

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 11:36 AM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

To the chagrin of Parliament, the Browncoats have a reunion in orbit around Osirus.

OR

Announcer voice over: ...and they ate the Fox execs, and there was much rejoicing...

(y'know it wouldn't be CT w/o a Monty Python reference!)

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 12:06 PM

KESSIE

Mal: "Frell.. can we starburst?"

or

Mal: Nara` you said there would be only a few of your customers!
Inara *smiles shyly*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They say it’s the last song/They don’t know us,you see /Its only the last song/If we let it be

http://www.darknessenemyinc.de.vu/

MY Shops:
http://www.spreadshirt.net/shop.php?sid=84584
(Europe)
http://www.zazzle.com/contributors/products/gallery/browse_results.asp
?cid=238756307378070768

Official Serenity site
http://browncoats.serenitymovie.com/serenity/index.html?fuseaction=too
ls.invlink&u=Kessie&linkID=36

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 12:26 PM

CHARLIETHEBLOODY

not even reavers were going to stop the crew getting planetside to pick up their pre-ordered copy of the big damn movie...

"I'm an artist, with an e and a beret."

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 7:57 PM

KAYLEE4SIMON

Wash: Don't panic... don't panic...
Mal: So this is it. We're gonna die.
Wash: Yeah. We're gonna die.
[pauses]
Wash: No... no! What's this?
[goes over to control panel]
Mal: What's that?
Wash: What's this...? What's this...?
[flips switch]
Wash: This... is... nothing. Yeah, we're gonna die.

or

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy also talks about reavers. It says, "Avoid if at all possible."

or

Business wasn't going so well so the crew had to get jobs at the local Dominos as pizza delivery transport ship.

or

That's the last time Wash asked directions from a rabbit who took a wrong turn at Albuquerque.

or

The Fox executive that canceled Firefly, the Lone Gunmen, the Tick, Tru Calling, John Doe, Dark Angel, Wonderfalls, and Greg the Bunny was never heard from again.

(yeah yeah I stole the first to from hhg but ya gotta admit hhg has some great quotes)

Keep shiny!

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 8:33 PM

FLORALBUNNY

"This is Dave Golbloots with your noon-time traffic report. There's a heck of a jam at L5, possibly the result of the A-1 Ship-Wash advertising a full scrub and hot wax plus a fill-up for only 5 credits. Authorities are on their way to investigate, so if you're one of the guys in line you might think about moving on."

bun
-- bastards singed my turtle --

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 10:25 PM

CHOLLETT

Voice-over: "Those Reynolds boys was always gettin' into a heap o' trouble, what with the law on their tail...."

OR

Wash: "Whoa. Good lineup."

OR

Wash: "Wow. Didn't know the DVD would be this popular!"
Mal: "Wash, consider what you just said for a moment."
Wash: "Ah. Silly comment. Never mind."

OR

...and the crew of Serenity sailed quietly and calmly through the remnants of the Star Wars movies...

OR

Mal: "Wash?"
Wash: "Yeah, Mal?"
Mal: "Don't Panic."

OR

Mal: "Wash, do you feel a gust coming on?"
Wash (beginning to grin): "Yeah, Mal, I do."

OR

Mal: "GET OUTTA THE WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!"
Wash: "Gorrammit I DON'T NEED A BACK SPACESHIP DRIVER!

OR

Mal: "Pull over!"
Wash: "Okay, fine!"
Mal: "Good!"
Wash: "OKAY!"
Mal: "FINE! Thanks for pulling over."

I'm babbling like a moonbrain.

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 10:37 PM

PSANDUSKY

Holiday traffic around the 'Verse is always a ruttin' mess. We get snow, they get Reavers.

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Sunday, December 18, 2005 10:48 PM

BARCLAY

"So, you all are were watching that little chat with the Reavers?"
"Yeah."
"Did you see us fight?"
"No."
"TRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!"

or

Mal: "What do you mean the Alliance put a Reaver homing beacon on my ship?"

or

Mal: "What do you mean the Alliance put a Reaver homing beacon on my ship? This is

Select to view spoiler:

payback for uncovering that whole Miranda thing, isn't it?

"

or

Mal: "So, Blue Sun decided to just send the Reavers after us?"
Wash: "Seems so."
Kaylee: "What are we gonna do?"
Zoe: "In a time of war, we would have stood our ground."
Inara: "You did try and tell me once that you never run from a fight."
Mal: "Are y'all trying to die!? Really?"

"You are on the Global Frequency."
http://www.frequencysite.com
http://kfmonkey.blogspot.com

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Monday, December 19, 2005 8:12 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Sign Reads:

NOW ENTERING
REAVER TERRITORY
Trespassers will be:
*Raped
*Eaten
*Worn Fashionably

(and here is the shameless tie-in link: http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew/707955)

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Monday, December 19, 2005 8:29 PM

FLORALBUNNY

December 19th, the hour growing late, and everyone in the gorram Galaxy was making a run to the store to pick up a Very Special DVD that was to be released at midnight.

bun
-- Bastards singed my turtle --

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Tuesday, December 20, 2005 4:21 AM

MANTICHORUS

Serenity carefully threads itself through the never-ending tide of reality TV shows...

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Tuesday, December 20, 2005 4:47 AM

PSOLARIS

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Sign Reads:

NOW ENTERING
REAVER TERRITORY
Trespassers will be:
*Raped
*Eaten
*Worn Fashionably

*Not necessarily in that order

Psolaris

"Ten percent of nuthin' is...let me do the math here...nuthin' into nuthin'...carry the nuthin'"

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Thursday, December 22, 2005 7:43 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Wash: Every...uhh...man?...there go back inside or we'll blow a new crater in...uhh (whispers to Mal) Mal, you sure this is gonna work on these guys?

OR

Wash: Merry Christmas to all and to all a good flight!

OR

Jayne: Gorrammit! Get made a Saint, and get your own holiday, and EVERYONE in the 'Verse wants a piece of you!
Book: Hey, you're the one shot a man at 200 yards with a bent scope.
Jayne: Ain't you dead?
Mal: Jayne, are you talkin' to Vera again?
Jayne: No! I mean...uhh...yes! I mean uhh...I'll be in my bunk.

OR

Mal: BWAH!
Reavers(in unison): BWARGARRRRARRGGGLARRGLLARR!
Mal: Oh go se...

OR

'Versal Studios opens up its newest movie-themed ride: Serenity: Run For Miranda, where they employ actual Reavers to heighten the experience.

(btw- gonna let this ride through Christmas Day, and start voting on the 26th, so keep up the good captioning because on the 28th, I'm drawing for prizes!)

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Thursday, December 22, 2005 8:19 PM

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE

Sign:

MIRANDA
Population: PWN3D!!!

OR

JAYNE:"I'm scared, someone please hold me..."

MAL:"Erm...Jayne?"

JAYNE:"I SAID HOLD ME GORRAMMIT!!!"

OR

MIRANDA
Pop.:29'970'000 humans
30'000 reavers
1 that really weird guy that nobody likes

SLIGHT TWIST

MIRANDA
Pop.:29'970'000 humans
30'000 reavers
1 that guy with cheese on his head

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Creator of "THE OTHER SHINY CAPTION GAME"!
www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01
Time for some thrilling heroics!
poor_noel2@hotmail.com

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Thursday, December 22, 2005 9:04 PM

FLORALBUNNY

8 of 9 cast members:
"SUMMER!!!!!!!!!"

bun
-- bastards singed my turtle --

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Friday, December 23, 2005 12:14 PM

RYCE

Mal: Wasn't our theme song Take me out to the black?

OR

Mal: Why is it again that we're rushing to go shopping two days before the holidays?
Kaylee: I'm out of batteries, Cap'n. Unless you want to talk to Simon for me...
Simon: *gulp*

No power in the 'verse can stop me!

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Friday, December 23, 2005 1:14 PM

MDNIGHTRADIO7L

To add to the myriad Shaun of the Dead crossovers that have been made over the course of Caption Tightpants:

Zoe: Well? Is it clear?
Mal [wide eyed]: ...No.
Zoe: How many?
Mal: ...Lots.

“I loath bus stations. Terrible places. Full of lost luggage and lost souls.”

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Friday, December 23, 2005 1:21 PM

CITIZEN

Welcome back Caption Tightpants!
Can't believe I missed this...

Mal started reconsidering Wash's position on the ship when he showed him where he learnt to fly...

Or

Mal: I'm telling you Zoe, second hand spaceship sales! I can't believe we haven't thought of it before!
Zoe: Uhuh, Sir I think you have a problem with your brain being missing.

Or

Mal: Jayne, why didn't you listen to me when I said don't press the big red button that fires the Mega Death Ray.
Jayne: Aww Mal...
Mal: What have we learned today?
Jayne: Your the captain...

Or

Jayne: What, I thought they were goin' to start a fair fight...

Or

Mal: Wash! I said don't, DON'T! go through reaver territory!
Wash: Oh. Would now be a good time too...

More insane ramblings by the people who brought you beeeer milkshakes!
Remember, the ice caps aren't melting, the water is being liberated.

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Friday, December 23, 2005 1:37 PM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

(to continue in the Shaun o' the Dead tradition...not to be confused with going along with the Monty Python tradition, or slash tradition or lemur tradition or...)

Wash: I don't see any Reavers.
Jayne: Shht! Don't ruttin' call 'em that!
Wash: Don't call them what?
Jayne: Don't use the gorram rho word.
Simon: Did Jayne just use Latin? This must be what going mad feels like.
Mal: Zoe, is that true?
Zoe: I think he just did, Sir.
Kaylee: Oh, that's shiny! Jayne's learnin'!
Inara: *rolls eyes*
River: Miranda...fantastic...from the latin...
Book (from beyond): You are ALL going to the special hell...

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Friday, December 23, 2005 2:33 PM

MUTT999

Mal couldn't get to Miranda fast enough when he heard the one and only Shoprite there was having a sale on turnips.

"That's the buffet table....."

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Saturday, December 24, 2005 12:06 AM

JETFLAIR

"An advanced case of road rage."

or

"Hope you got collision insurance."

I just noticed....I WON the last one - sweet!

________________________________________________

"Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down, tells you when she's hurting 'fore she keens. Makes her a home." .......We love you, captain.

"This is the captain. We may experience some slight turbulence and then.....explode"

www.serenityverse.com - Zoe necklace replicas, Serenity dogtags, jewelry, image gallery w/ custom DVD covers, other goodies!

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Saturday, December 24, 2005 3:06 PM

FLORALBUNNY

On the night before Christmas
Away out in space
Every Reaver was stirring.
'Twas a great Firefly chase!

Former losers were hung
From the ceilings with care
In hope that fresh victims
Soon would be there.

(And here lies creativity, drugged into repose by extensive tasting of the sugary turkeyery tryptophanic cooking. 'Tis the lull before the Eve dinner here on the US Left Coast, and already Santa time in the UK, you lucky devils. See you later if there's any peace here. Merry Happy Everything to All, and on Earth, Peace.)

bun
-- Bastards singed my turtle --

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Saturday, December 24, 2005 4:34 PM

JETFLAIR

Quote:
Originally posted by FloralBunny:
On the night before Christmas
Away out in space
Every Reaver was stirring.
'Twas a great Firefly chase!

Former losers were hung
From the ceilings with care
In hope that fresh victims
Soon would be there.

(And here lies creativity, drugged into repose by extensive tasting of the sugary turkeyery tryptophanic cooking. 'Tis the lull before the Eve dinner here on the US Left Coast, and already Santa time in the UK, you lucky devils. See you later if there's any peace here. Merry Happy Everything to All, and on Earth, Peace.)

bun
-- Bastards singed my turtle --

That is so morbid, yet somehow utterly hilarious!

_____________________________________________

"Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down, tells you when she's hurting 'fore she keens. Makes her a home." .......We love you, captain.

"This is the captain. We may experience some slight turbulence and then.....explode"

www.serenityverse.com - Zoe necklace replicas, Serenity dogtags, jewelry, image gallery w/ custom DVD covers, other goodies!

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Sunday, December 25, 2005 12:27 AM

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA

Quote:
Originally posted by jetflair:
Quote:
Originally posted by FloralBunny:
On the night before Christmas
Away out in space
Every Reaver was stirring.
'Twas a great Firefly chase!

Former losers were hung
From the ceilings with care
In hope that fresh victims
Soon would be there.

(And here lies creativity, drugged into repose by extensive tasting of the sugary turkeyery tryptophanic cooking. 'Tis the lull before the Eve dinner here on the US Left Coast, and already Santa time in the UK, you lucky devils. See you later if there's any peace here. Merry Happy Everything to All, and on Earth, Peace.)

That is so morbid, yet somehow utterly hilarious!

_____________________________________________

It would make a great Alice Cooper song.

---------------------------------------------
The real-life box droppin', man-ape gone wrong thing, now without the pesky falling boxes

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Sunday, December 25, 2005 12:34 AM

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Kaylee's favorite place: the Galactic Pic-Your-Part Junkyard.

---------------------------------------------
The real-life box droppin', man-ape gone wrong thing, now without the pesky falling boxes

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Sunday, December 25, 2005 12:53 AM

ETHAN

Mal : *looking towards River* "Jayne just in case, prepare a spacesuit and some Fruity Oaty Bars."

or

Mal : "Anyone wanna hear a knock knock joke?"

or

Mal : "Okay anyone who needs to take a pee, now's the time..."

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Sunday, December 25, 2005 1:27 AM

ETHAN

Quote:
Originally posted by FloralBunny:
8 of 9 cast members:
"SUMMER!!!!!!!!!"

brilliant

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Sunday, December 25, 2005 4:07 PM

NUCKLES87

Jayne: Punch buggy Reaver!

(punch)

Simon: Ow!

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Sunday, December 25, 2005 7:47 PM

FLORALBUNNY

Everyone joined in the traditional competition for the giblets....

bun
-- everyone knows you can't pull the wishbone until it has dried out --

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Sunday, December 25, 2005 7:49 PM

JUSTJOE

Mal: How did the Reavers get so many ships?

Simon (under his breath): They've probably been following us around and picking up the pieces that fall off.

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Sunday, December 25, 2005 8:32 PM

NOX2HED

Finally, Demolition Derby is back with a Vengeance!

(If have not seen the lame-o commercials, this will make no sense . . . and may not anyways)

Mal: “I’m so sorry, are you OK?

Reaver: “ Yeah, no problems I didn’t have before, how about you?”

Mal: “Yeah I’m fine. Was my fault, should’ve used my turn signal” (Wash in background ‘actually Capt, my chest kinda hurts’}

Reaver: “No, no, I didn’t stop at the light, it’s all my fault”

Mal: “ Hey, you be Jellin?”

Reaver: “You Bettcha, be Jellin like Magellan!”

_ _ _ _ _
One of us is crazy, and it's not you!

Help! I'm standing and I can't fall down.

·Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis. (J Handy)

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Monday, December 26, 2005 7:51 AM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Get inside the vault and VOTE!

http://vote.sparklit.com/web_poll.spark/955566