You might be a browncoat if ... by MissAyaTam

GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

You might be a browncoat if ...

POSTED BY: MISSAYATAM
UPDATED: Saturday, April 24, 2004 17:44
SHORT URL:
VIEWED: 17121
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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 3:34 PM

My best friend and I were having a fun discussion the other day and I thought it would be fun to have here as well. You know those " you might be a redneck if" jokes ? Well we were doing those to firefly.

For example : You might be a browncoat if you have learned chinese just to understand the cursing in firefly.

I was just curious what everyone else could come up with. We didn't come up with anything exceptionally funny. ( and I apologize if someone else has already done this thread I am fairly new to the site. )

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 4:26 PM

KNIBBLET

You might be a browncoat if ...
Your idea of a major faux pas is to NOT share your strawberries and herbs*.

*not to be confused with "Peaches and Herb" a disco soul group from the 1970's.

"Just keep walkin, preacher man."

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 4:32 PM

KARENKAY99

... if you have a hat like Jayne's.

OK, that sounds like I'm bragging, but did I tell you already that I have a shiny new hat just like Jayne's in The Message? I did?? I guess that is braggin' then. :)

"They say the snow on the roof is too heavy. They say the ceiling will cave in. His brains are in terrible danger."

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 4:39 PM

GUNRUNNER

You maybe a Browncoat if…
…You get a discount on account of your intimidating manner.
…You call her Vera.
…Bawahhhh.

Quote:
Originally posted by karenkay99:
... if you have a hat like Jayne's.

OK, that sounds like I'm bragging, but did I tell you already that I have a shiny new hat just like Jayne's in The Message? I did?? I guess that is braggin' then. :)

"They say the snow on the roof is too heavy. They say the ceiling will cave in. His brains are in terrible danger."

I hate to brag but I do to... Ok I lied... I like bragging!

The Firefly CCG Web Site:
http://mywebpage.netscape.com/Bllm119/firefly_ccg_web_site.htm
>Help out today!

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 5:14 PM

NUR

When you come home from university for a brief visit before summer semester and your brother is more excited that you brought your DVD set home that the fact that you are home...and you understand. I guess that makes us a family of Browncoats :P

www.thecherryorchard.net

Those who restrain desire, do so because thiers is weak enough to be restrained.
-William Blake

O my Lord! bestow wisdom on me, and join me with the righteous.
-Qur'an 26:83

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 5:16 PM

ZOID

Great question!

I don't know if this one counts, but I named my formidable, though slightly goofy male German Shepherd, 'Jayne'.

zoid

"My days of taking you seriously have certainly come to a middle."

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 5:48 PM

LILIANNA

If you use any chinese phrase to cuss.

If you use the words Gorram or shiny in your everyday language.

If you retort to someone with a quick witted smart ass comment. (i.e.- "You're mouth is running, you might want to look to that)

If you refuse to leave any member of your crew behind.

Love is the gift at the end of a long journey of self exploration and inner peace.

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 6:41 PM

ORANGERFUL

....you think the latest addition to the cast of 'Angel' is a man they call Jayne

(honestly, if it wasn't for the forums, I wouldn't realize his character had a name!)

...if any of your video games that allows you to name characters have the entire firefly crew entered

(I'm addicted to Worms II, and team Serenity is "Decent"!, though Simon never survives a round)

bedtime now, but believe me, I'll be brainstorming all night long...bwahahaha!

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 6:43 PM

VETERAN

Don't squat with your spurs on.

If you've ever pondered what the most common last words of a Fox programing excecutive are, and planned experiments to verify your ponderings... you might be a Browncoat.

If your richest relative just bought a new house and you gave him a Firefly box set as a house warming gift (after you helped him put it up on jacks) .... you might be a Browncoat.

If your idea of a fun eveining is spend an inordinate amount of time perusing a certain fan website.... you might be a browncoat.

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 6:56 PM

NOOCYTE

...You sent a .jpg of the "Firefly" logo to a custom bumper sticker site, and put the resulting sticker on your car....the one with the new license plate that reads "SHINY" (sorry, Pennsylvania Browncoats; I'm the one snapped it up!).

My wife is a very, VERY patient woman...

Department of Redundancy Department

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 7:11 PM

THECLAPS

... whenever you check the nutritional chart and see "Protein" you think of frosting.

... whenever you see a blue glowstick you think you're brain's going to melt out your ears.

... whenever you hear the characters on Earth: Final Conflict refer to someone as "Companion" you giggle.

... You don't find anything weird with a costume consisting of a Cowboy hat, a lazer pistol and tight pants)

Ain't. We. Just.

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 7:14 PM

HOWDYROCKERBABY1

Quote:
Originally posted by orangerful:
....you think the latest addition to the cast of 'Angel' is a man they call Jayne

(honestly, if it wasn't for the forums, I wouldn't realize his character had a name!)

...if any of your video games that allows you to name characters have the entire firefly crew entered

(I'm addicted to Worms II, and team Serenity is "Decent"!, though Simon never survives a round)

bedtime now, but believe me, I'll be brainstorming all night long...bwahahaha!

I was so excited when i heard "Jayne" would be on Angel! This "Jayne" seems to be the exact oposite of Firefly's Jayne. i mean he's clean, speaks in full and cohearent sentences, he's basically a know-it-all. he hee hee. i like the Jayne with the goatee(sp?) better though!

"Did I hear something about black market beagles? They have smallish droppings."

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 7:39 PM

BILLYUNO

Forever lurker, first time poster. Couldn't resist this one.

You might be a browncoat if...

...You wear a coat that's BROWN! Can we say duh? "It was on sale."

...you know all the words to the Firefly theme, but still can't sing the star spangled banner...

...you reffer to our president as go tsao duh, fong luh, gao yang jong duh goo yang.

That last one may just be me...

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 7:58 PM

GUNHAND

Well same here, first time posting but been lurkin' about.

I may be a Browncoat but I'm not sure...

I have a brown coat, duster in fact, no bullet hole patches on it...yet. ;)

I own a rifle with a name, it isn't a fancy Callahan full-bore autolock, it's a Winchester 94...the little brass plate on the stock does say Vera though.

My newest horse is named Jayne, and yeah he's got maleparts.

And if that doesn't cinch it in a couple weeks I'm getting a tattoo, yeah it's going to spell out Serenity in Chinese with the nifty scrollwork from the DVD menu around it to set it off some.

The funny thing is that I've indoctrinated enough of the other people on the ranch into the Church of Firefly that no one thinks any of this is strange at all. A few even know what I'm saying when I swear in Chinese.

Although they do snicker when I turned down the offer of a Hero of Canton t-shirt as a birthday present because I look too much like Adam Baldwin and don't want people always asking me if I'm originally from Ohio and what I did that was so heroic. Does that seem right to you?

I sorta think I'm a Browncoat though. :D

Well my days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle.

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 8:24 PM

LINDALE

You might be a browncoat if...
your immediate reaction to news of the FF movie is, "Well Gorrammit, that's the shiniest news I've heard all week!"

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 1:33 AM

DUCESTECUM

You buy bath crystals named "Serenity."

You convert fellow coworkers to Firefly addicts.

You sit in front of TV every night watching Firefly DVD's and listening to Joss' commentaries.

You use Firefly lingo in everyday language.

Every conversation with friends and coworkers includes something about Firefly a year after it has been cancelled!

"No Power in the 'Verse can stop us."

"And I'm thinkin' you weren't burdened with an overabundance of schooling." Mal - Train Job

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 1:41 AM

WERZBOWSKI

- you work at car dealership and everytime you see the service technicians wearing blue latex gloves, you start muttering to yourself:

"Two by two, hands of blue...:

"Wherever you go, there you are."
- Dr. B. Banzai

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 2:28 AM

AERONSTORM

....you own a Jayne-type hat

(I found mine during winter closeout - It's not quite the same, but at least it's orange and has earflaps!)

....you call your green pair of coveralls "Kaylee pants"

....you printed up the blue sun logo in dark blue on transfer paper, and cut off the sleeves and collar of an old brown tshirt just so you could have a "Jayne shirt"

(I have to say, it's quite comfortable!)

....you've converted someone else to FF

(Mom, sister, brother-in-law!)

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 2:34 AM

BROWNCOAT1

May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one.

You might be a Browncoat if.....

you bought a coat that looks just like Mal's and wear it all the time.

You might be a Browncoat if.....

you had a friend w/ a machine shop build you a replica of Mal's gun because it is just so gorram shiny.

You might be a Browncoat if.....

you do all the Mandarin translations for the converts you have over for your Firefly viewing party.

You might be a Browncoat if.....

if you are already making plans for going to see the BDM as many times as you can while kidnapping friends and family to go w/ you.

You might be a Browncoat if.....

if you have an "Everything I needed to know in life I learned from Firefly" poster hanging in your office at work.

"May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one."

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 3:45 AM

STATIC

Quote:
Originally posted by Lilianna:
If you use any chinese phrase to cuss.

If you use the words Gorram or shiny in your everyday language.

If you retort to someone with a quick witted smart ass comment. (i.e.- "You're mouth is running, you might want to look to that)

If you refuse to leave any member of your crew behind.

Love is the gift at the end of a long journey of self exploration and inner peace.

So are you like that, Lili, or is that your fiancee?

==================================================
"Wash. . .we got some local color happening. A grand entrance would not go amiss."

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 5:04 AM

DELIA

. . . your new favorite expression is "not so much."

. . . you've ever adopted a hamster just so you could name him Simon.

. . . you've ever gotten through a really boring class by watching Shindig on your laptop (sound on mute, subtitles on).

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 5:22 AM

CYBERSNARK

. . . If you get creeped out by medical personel wearing blue gloves.

. . . If you've ever tried to sneak out the back door of a hospital.

. . . If you've ever tried to sneak someone else out the back door of a hospital.

. . . You've referred to jumbo-sized gold-wrapped chocolate bars as "military rations."

. . . You drive like Wash flies.

. . . You live in the city but want to buy an ATV.

-----
We applied the cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient.

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 5:36 AM

DAVEY

Your pregnant wife asks for suggestions for girls names and you come up with
Inara
Kayleigh
River
Summer
Zoe
Funny thing is they all made the shortlist

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 5:47 AM

CHANNAIN

i DO aim to misbehave

You might be a Browncoat if.....

after the server dies at work, when the temporary set up is established, the first place you point your browser to is a certain fan web site.

you name a kitten Simon because A) he's pretty darn shuai, and B) you're very well awere you're taking him from everything he knows, from his friends and family and subjecting him to the moody antics of not one, but three human females.

see a guy in any TV show weilding a fairly large firearm and wondering if he named it "Vera."

the last three lines of the theme song give you a chill each and every time you sing them - which is quite often.

you spend drives home or to school plotting your next Firefly RP post.

you spend drives home with both hands on the wheel at 7 and 5 while taking the sharp curves in a construction zone because Wash does that, and Wash looks cool.

when your sister hears a song on the TV and says it reminds her of Firefly

We have art so as not to die of truth ~ Neitzsche
http://www.mnartists.org/artistHome.do?rid=7922

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 5:51 AM

ANNIGERRIA

Quote:
Originally posted by Werzbowski:
- you work at car dealership and everytime you see the service technicians wearing blue latex gloves, you start muttering to yourself:

"Two by two, hands of blue...:

"Wherever you go, there you are."
- Dr. B. Banzai

This may be terrible, but the first time I saw those "hands of blue", I thought Psi-Corps, where's Bester?

**************************************************
Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving and revolving at 900 miles an hour... The Galaxy Song, Meaning of Life, Monty Python
**************************************************

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 6:20 AM

LILIANNA

It's mostly my fiancee,Static. But me sometimes.. I reallt need to learn of the chinese so I can cuss and not get in trouble!.. well the Korean girl Iwork with may know what I'm saying.. *snickers8 But she cusses in Korean. I've heard her.

Love is the gift at the end of a long journey of self exploration and inner peace.

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 6:20 AM

LILIANNA

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 6:21 AM

MAUGWAI

You might be a Browncoat if you cheer "Zoeeeee!" any time you see Gina Torres in ANYTHING.

You might be a Browncoat if you take the time to post reasons why you might be a Browncoat.

"Dear diary, today I was pompous and my sister was crazy."

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 6:57 AM

DOCTORTAM

you might be a browncoat if...
you name your fantasy baseball team "Canton Mudders"

Why doesn't it ever go smooth?

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 10:06 AM

BADGERSHAT

If you hate Fox, and would gladly lay down your life to bring about its destruction...

...you might be a Browncoat.

If you've ever watched the episode of Star Trek where Kirk et al meet the guy who invented warp drive, and meet the glowing nebula he lives with who is called "The Companion," and a whole bizzarre set of images came to mind...

... you might be a Browncoat.

If you are dedicated enough to have read the line above this one about Star Trek, and took the the time to figure out what the hell The Hat was saying...

... you might be a Browncoat.

If you've developed a habit of saying "gorram" and/or "ruttin" in stressful situations...

... you might be a Browncoat.

If you spent inappropriate amounts of time daydreaming about being the middle part of a Kaylee-and-Inara sandwich...

... you might be... um... BadgersHat...

--The Hat

***************************
"I like smackin 'em"--Jayne

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 10:47 AM

HOWDYROCKERBABY1

you plot out just how you are going to make all of your friends addicted to the series.

you start asking people if they dong ma? without realizing you didn't say it in english.

you dream about it every night or at least almost every night. including several dreams where you marry mal!

i guess i'm a browncoat because all of these apply!

"Did I hear something about black market beagles? They have smallish droppings."

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 10:53 AM

HOWDYROCKERBABY1

you suddenly break out in song saying "The hero of Canton, the man they call Jayne!"

"Did I hear something about black market beagles? They have smallish droppings."

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 11:04 AM

THEFOP

-if you check fireflyfans.net before you check your email
-if you spend more time reading fan forums than you do working on a termpaper
-if your argument to end all arguments is "You can't take the sky from me"
-If while playing an FPS game, you sing "The Hero of Canton" and shout Jayne quotes at passersby
-You stongly consider learning mandarin after watching Serenity
-You strongly consider learning Mandarin Calligraphy after watching Inara do it
-You know the names of every actor from Firefly, their ages, their marital status, their place of birth, and whether or not they talk to fans

once the snow got so deep you almost couldn't hear margaret atwood

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 11:11 AM

THECLAPS

Quote:
-You know the names of every actor from Firefly, their ages, their marital status, their place of birth, and whether or not they talk to fans

Jewel Staite's MARRIED!!! And she's only 20 years old!! OMG! And her husband looks like a total wuss!

"What did they have last year?" STANDARDS gorram it!

I'm just being mean now. I wish them the best of luck (and hundreds of fat children). However, if things ever get bumpy, I'll always be here... waiting... cuttin' on myself. . . *fade to black, creepy music, soul wrenching scream, silence*

Yeah I guess I'm a browncoat

Edit: clarification: I am joking!

Ain't. We. Just.

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 11:15 AM

BADGERSHAT

Quote:
Originally posted by TheClaps:
Quote:
-You know the names of every actor from Firefly, their ages, their marital status, their place of birth, and whether or not they talk to fans

Jewel Staite's MARRIED!!! And she's only 20 years old!! OMG! And her husband looks like a total wuss!

"What did they have last year?" STANDARDS gorram it!

I'm just being mean now. I wish them the best of luck (and hundreds of fat children). However, if things ever get bumpy, I'll always be here... waiting... cuttin' on myself. . . *fade to black, creepy music, soul wrenching scream, silence*

Yeah I guess I'm a browncoat

Edit: clarification: I am joking!

Ain't. We. Just.

... um... you might want to ask the nurse about your current dosage, it seems you're building a tolerance...

--The Hat

***************************
"I like smackin 'em"--Jayne

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 11:27 AM

THECLAPS

Quote:
... um... you might want to ask the nurse about your current dosage, it seems you're building a tolerance...

--The Hat

I knew that from a previously unrelated thread. *whistles innocently*. It's not like I'm some kind of sociopath! No no no no no. I just like typing on forums like I am.

speaking of which:

You might be a browncoat IF:
-you find rambling and unnecessary surgery with a butcher's knife dang near HIGH-larry-ous.

Ain't. We. Just.

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 11:36 AM

BADGERSHAT

Quote:

You might be a browncoat IF:
-you find rambling and unnecessary surgery with a butcher's knife dang near HIGH-larry-ous.

Ain't. We. Just.

... oh... okay... thank you sir... um... I'll be right back... and, um, I'm gonna come back with some friends... they wear these lovely, soft white coats...

--The Hat

***************************
"I like smackin 'em"--Jayne

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 1:38 PM

MALICIOUS

You might be a Browncoat if:

....You see Ron Glass on a Friends re-run and yell out, "Shepherd Book! Look, honey, it's Shepherd Book!"

....You see a preview for "Dodgeball" and only want to see it because Wash is in it.

....You watch 2 year old VHS tapes to see if maybe you have any old Firefly episodes on them.

....You swerve your car and then floor the gas pedal to avoid getting creamed from behind after an idiot cuts in front of you (and then, of course, slows down) and you say to your car, "That's my good girl."

....You see Samuel L. Jackson in a new light, knowing he is married to Zoe.

....You watch Caleb on BTVS and think "Mal is nothing like that!"

....You hope all day long that when you open your email, someone from this website has read your posts and FEELS THE SAME WAY about fictional people you don't even know! (oh, wait, that would be "you might be a geek if...")

Mal-licious

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 1:47 PM

WHOODAHN

Actually only Mal and Zoë are Browncoats.
Jayne, Kaylee, Simon, River and Wash didn't fight in the war.

Inara seemed to favor the Alliance during the war I think.

We still don't know about Book but I agree with the theory that he is ex-Alliance.

You might be a Browncoat if everything I just said don't mean a gorram thing!

"I aint crazy and I got papers to prove it"

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 2:23 PM

THECLAPS

Quote:
....You see Samuel L. Jackson in a new light, knowing he is married to Zoe.

I thought she was married to Laurence Fishburne? This demands an inquiry...

EDIT: Yep, I'm right. The Matrix will never be the same again.

!!! Again, this might explain why she has a role in the subsequent Matrix "movies". Either they met there or their relationship might have landed her the small gig ;)

Ain't. We. Just.

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 4:01 PM

ZOID

Chainnan wrote:

Quote:
...you name a kitten Simon... subjecting him to the moody antics of not one, but three human females.

How much water do you have to walk on in a former life to get that reincarnation?

Thoughtfully,

zoid

"Gooood myth!"

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 4:06 PM

ZOID

Annigerria wrote:

Quote:
This may be terrible, but the first time I saw those "hands of blue", I thought Psi-Corps, where's Bester?

Simple. He got stranded on-planet when Mal gave his job to Kaylee. (Delivered very straight-faced)

Thoughtfully Yours,

zoid
_________________________________________________

"River and me was best friends, back then. I named my first-born daughter after her. 'Course, you can't swing a dead cat 'round here on I-Day without hittin' a River..."

- Kaywinnit Tam, wife and mother of 6, A Child Shall Lead Them: A History of the Second War of Independence Wilkins, Richard

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 5:21 PM

MALICIOUS

Oh, Jeez, I am SOOOO sorry! You are right. Lawrence Fishburne, I apologize for giving your lovely wife to someone else! (You might be an idiot if...you do stuff like that!)

Mal-licious

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Thursday, April 22, 2004 2:55 AM

DAVEY

you wanted Caleb to beat Buffy or Jasmine to win in Angel

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Thursday, April 22, 2004 4:28 AM

CHANNAIN

i DO aim to misbehave

Quote:
Originally posted by zoid:
Channain wrote:
Quote:
...you name a kitten Simon... subjecting him to the moody antics of not one, but three human females.
How much water do you have to walk on in a former life to get that reincarnation?

Oceans, baobei - Oceans.

We have art so as not to die of truth ~ Neitzsche
http://www.mnartists.org/artistHome.do?rid=7922

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Thursday, April 22, 2004 5:44 AM

KOZURE

If you always find yourself in an Alliance-friendly bar come U-day, looking for a "quiet drink"...

...you might be a Browncoat.

If you do the job, and then you get paid...

...you might be a Browncoat.

If you've had the Alliance on you, criminals and savages; half the people on your ship have been shot or wounded, including yourself, and you're harbouring known fugitives...

...you might be a Browncoat.

If you're willing to use a UA-571D Ground Sentry to fend off Alliance skiffs with your last screaming shout of defiance...

...you might be a Browncoat.

If you seen a certain movie enough times to know what the joke is about naming a Ground Sentry a "UA-571D"...

...you might be an Aliens fan.

Kozure the Kamikaze Highlander

Proud Citizen of Canada-That-Was

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Thursday, April 22, 2004 6:44 AM

MAUGWAI

You might be a Browncoat if you wear your new Jayne T-shirt to Universal studios and stand around puffing your chest out, hoping either another Browncoat sees it or a Universal exec happens by and comments on your support of the film.

(Sadly, not a single person all day commented on my shirt. I did get some double-takes,though, from people who didn't know what the hell it meant.)

"Dear diary, today I was pompous and my sister was crazy."

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Thursday, April 22, 2004 7:55 AM

BADGERSHAT

Quote:
Originally posted by Kozure:

If you're willing to use a UA-571D Ground Sentry to fend off Alliance skiffs with your last screaming shout of defiance...

...you might be a Browncoat.

If you seen a certain movie enough times to know what the joke is about naming a Ground Sentry a "UA-571D"...

...you might be an Aliens fan.

Kozure the Kamikaze Highlander

Proud Citizen of Canada-That-Was

I read the first one, thought, "Hey, that's the Sentry they used in 'Aliens!', read the line after it, and literally sprayed a gorram bottle of water--through my

nose, no less--onto the computer monitor at the office...

I admit it, I've seen "Aliens"--the Director's cut, that is--somewhere in the neighborhood of 75 times...

Best sci-fi action movie ever, til "Serenity" comes out.

And you own me a ruttin roll of paper towels for my desk...

--The Hat

***************************
"I like smackin 'em"--Jayne

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Thursday, April 22, 2004 8:53 AM

FFFAN1

Quote:
Originally posted by BrownCoat1:
you bought a coat that looks just like Mal's and wear it all the time.
...
you had a friend w/ a machine shop build you a replica of Mal's gun because it is just so gorram shiny.

I gotta know if you actually did these. If so, where did you get the coat?

I don't wish to alarm anyone, but I think we're being followed...

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Thursday, April 22, 2004 9:05 AM

BROWNCOAT1

May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one.

Quote:
Originally posted by FFFan1:
Quote:
Originally posted by BrownCoat1:
you bought a coat that looks just like Mal's and wear it all the time.
...
you had a friend w/ a machine shop build you a replica of Mal's gun because it is just so gorram shiny.

I gotta know if you actually did these. If so, where did you get the coat?

I don't wish to alarm anyone, but I think we're being followed...

Hey FFFan1. Got the coat from this shop:

http://www.adamleathers.com/genoldwestra.html

Great coat. Order it in the walnut (dark brown) color. It looks just like Mal's and I have been very happy with it. Their customer service is great to work with and they offer a money back guarantee if you are not happy w/ the coat.

"May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one."

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