theory on firefly cancellation by billyslummer

Quote:
Originally posted by Barclay:
But I must be wrong, because I'm too stupid to make such a well articulated argument that doesn't use mathematical symbols in place of words.

I think that he thinks that using "=,+" will make it a somehow more logically viable answer. To a point, the argument is somewhat logical.

However, I have a problem with the last two premises.

Quote:
Originally posted by BILLYSLUMMER:
cancelling firefly=smart move by fox network

What if, despite making a loss, it recoups it's losses through DVD releases, or spinoff films? Not a very logical argument

Quote:
Originally posted by BILLYSLUMMER:

all who disagree=stupid

Yes, this was, VERY well thoughtout.

I don't normally feed trolls, but this is what's stopping me from having to start homework.

EDIT: Somehow after editing my text had changed into Times New Roman. What the hell happened?

___________________________________
Jayne: "Know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I beat you with till you understand who's in command."

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 1:10 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Barclay:

But I must be wrong, because I'm too stupid to make such a well articulated argument

correct

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 1:29 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Fireflew:

I think that he thinks that using "=,+" will make it a somehow more logically viable answer. To a point, the argument is somewhat logical.

looking back now it seems i should have explained my resoning for using =++

as you have shown in other threads your complete inability to grasp any kind of logic regarding fireflys cancellation.

I thought it was only logical to dumb my theory down as much as possible however in doing so i have created perhaps the most perfect and indisputable theory ever DEVICED and to any who doubt that is actually a word. You have obviously failed to relise that the theory is not subject to the usual laws of physics as right now you are inside it perhaps more importantly it is now inside you as well

i have recently deviced a theory to explain THE theory to all who do not understand

theory=billy
billy=everywhere
you=somewhereinsideverywhere

as you can see i am in control of billy therefore i create the rules up untill now it has been perfectly balance and i can only hope this latest guide doesn't upset the balance

thank you for your time

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 2:07 AM

EMBERS

Quote:
Originally posted by billyslummer:
thank you for your time

why are we even responding to this little troll who only joined yesterday in the hopes of stirring up trouble?

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 2:27 AM

RETARDOSAUR

I know i shouldnt reply but i have a tiny problem deviced is not a real word!!
Get any real english dictionary out and you will find no such word!!
And if you use the definitions of each component
Viced being to squeeze like in a vice. And de meaning opposite you get unsqueezed.
So infact billy unsqueeaed his theory which i have to say is impressive.

As for every thing else he said some of it maybe true but due to the fact that we are fans of the show on this forum i think he should leave, as he clearly isnt nor wants to be and infact has probably never watched it!

Its quite simple im a retarded dinosaur

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 2:57 AM

NIKNAK

Its easy to say it was cancelled because it wasn't making enough money. It probably wasn't.

The more interesting question is why did Fox not give it the support it needed? I'm in England so I don't know exactly what they did but it sounds like they didn't really like it. If they had liked it they would have shown Serenity first and given it a slot where it didn't have to move for sporting events.

My theory is that fox execs didn't like the parallels with the american civil war with the losers as the heros, or the legalized prostitution. Of course, they might just have different tastes to us.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 3:36 AM

ECGORDON

There's no place I can be since I found Serenity.

I have devised a theory myself. Billyslummer's brain has been thoroughly warped by all the reality shows he apparently has been watching, rather than original, and superior, dramatic shows such as Firefly.

wo men ren ran zai fei xing.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 4:09 AM

He also seems to think that using mathematical symbols equates to a logical argument. If you're going to create a logical argument, at least make sure you have the following things:

- At least two TRUE premises.
- Inference between these two premises.
- A conclusion that uses this inference and is truth preserving.

For example:

Trolls contribute nothing to a message board
BillySlummer is a troll
Therefore, BillySlummer contributes nothing to the message board.

See?

I know my logic, troll.

Everyone else: welcome to the wonderful world of logic.

___________________________________
Jayne: "Know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I beat you with till you understand who's in command."

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 4:34 AM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!

Pack his bags and send this chump to Troll Country.

" They don't like it when you shoot at 'em. I worked that out myself. "

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 5:29 AM

Barclay, et al:

May I play, too? Troll-whacking is my 2nd-most favorite pastime, after 'navel exploration'. That's not a misspell, BTW. You'd be surprised what you can find in there amongst the lint, and it's infinitely more challenging than pulling the wings off of 'logical' trolls.

First, Barclay, you'll not find "deviced" in even an enhanced dictionary, because it is 'business-speak': a highly specialized jargon only utilized by the uppermost tier in the business echelons. The same with "resoning", as used by BillySlummer in a subsequent post; although, that was a misspelling of 'resining'. Allow me to further elucidate.

To 'device' a solution (in this case, a 'theory') is to use a 'business logic device' to assist one in taking a decision. These devices are consulted to receive their verdict on the logical soundness of a particular decision. Sometimes the answer is 'yes', sometimes 'no'. Most troublesome though are the times when the device's responses are not so clear-cut and human intervention becomes necessary. Surely there can be no more dreaded result for BillySimper or F*x TV execs -- when trying to determine the validity of their schemes -- than a 'business logic device' response of "Better not tell you now" or "Concentrate and ask again." For a complete, engineer's viewpoint of the 'business logic device', please see http://8ball.ofb.net/procedure.html.

Pay special attention to the heading entitled, "A Note About the Blue Fluid", as I believe that BillySlobber may have been one of the participants in the "non-blind Type I safety trial", which would explain everything, in my opinion (especially since I know Gail Berman was the other unfortunate human participant in this ill-fated trial).

As to "resoning" (sic, should be 'resining', pronounced: 'rE-z&n-ing, as in "reasoning"), this is defined as simply using the head God gave you -- and the resin with which it is filled -- to come to logical conclusions of one's own, in contradiction to the sound advice of the aforementioned 'business logic device'. Sometimes one must simply trust one's own instincts, right Li'l Billy?

It should be noted, however, that contravening the logic device can lead to catastrophic results, as in the case of the bulk of F*x TV's decisions. A review of their overall ratings show that they're fifth in a four-horse race. Those guys at F*x are a bunch of loose cannons. They should strictly adhere to the results returned by their business logic devices, since these are clearly more qualified to make decisions than the programming execs are.

Finally, to BillySlumber, I recommend a change of venue to a discussion board that more accurately reflects your debating abilities(?). I have recognized a comparable skill level at http://www.nick.com/blab/messageboards/viewboard.jhtml?bID=57 . You should rule comfortably there; but, beware! Some of those folks play rough and may be your superior in reasoning, though never your equal in resining. Just keep giving them those one-word rebuttals, which you have obviously refined to an art form (word search on 'graffiti'), and you should be able to keep most of them bewildered for the duration of their attention span...

Contemptfully,

zoid
_________________________________________________

"I got chunks of guys like you in my stools."
Frank 'Chairman of the Board' Sinatra, as portrayed by the late Phil Hartman

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 5:39 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by zoid:
Barclay, et al:

May I play, too? Troll-whacking is my 2nd-most favorite pastime, after 'navel exploration'. That's not a misspell, BTW. You'd be surprised what you can find in there amongst the lint, and it's infinitely more challenging than pulling the wings off of 'logical' trolls.

First, Barclay, you'll not find "deviced" in even an enhanced dictionary, because it is 'business-speak': a highly specialized jargon only utilized by the uppermost tier in the business echelons. The same with "resoning", as used by BillySlummer in a subsequent post; although, that was a misspelling of 'resining'. Allow me to further elucidate.

(etc. - don't wanna copy entire message because of length)

Wow... I thought I was being a smart ass (

)

I bow my head to you, my liege...

___________________________________
Jayne: "Know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I beat you with till you understand who's in command."

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 5:59 AM

BIKISDAD

I was going to lower myself to reply to the little troll, who's logic "does not resemble our earth logic". However, after reading Zoid's post... well, I couldn't top that.

Way to go, Zoid.

One short note already hit on by others. The troll seems to blame Firefly for its own cancellation because it had bad ratings. However, Firefly only had bad ratings because of the F*X network's treatment of the show. That one fly in the logic ointment makes anything else the troll said completely meaningless.

Apathy on the Rise. No One Cares.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 6:09 AM

I do not mind your petty insults rather it is billy otherwise known as THE THEORY you have to worry about

Billy allows all inside him to express themselves but it is only fair to warn you that billy screens every response before he reads them. Whitch means all messages have been so heavily rewritten before billy sees them that they are actually praise.

This would not normally be a problem but when I completed my second theory something awoke inside billy, something very close to jealousy.

As you may have guessed this has caused billy to expand using the praise from others as fuel. he now exists outside this thread and therefore outside of my control the first thing he has done is register a username I tried to stop him.

I take full responsibility for this I have always thought that billy would be content to live inside this thread. It was unforeseeable that billy grow so ambitious there are many theories on why this happened I did not want to create them but it seems billy already has. Probably to create more heartless allies to aid him in his dream to control the entire forum.

Theory 3
Your praise=billys ego to expand
Billys ego expanding=greater power to billy

Theory 4
Your ignorance=billy encouraged to become more powerful

Possibly to destroy you or merely make you understand I don’t know

Theory 4a
The creation of theory 2=billy determined to prove he is the number 1 theory

Whitch is rather silly actually as he is and always be the number1 theory because that is hes real name.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 6:29 AM

EBONEZER

Jesus Chrit, its like trying to reason with a brick wall.

Solution: Just leave him alone and he'll go away.

DON'T FEED THE TROLLS!

Just let this thread drop down into the archives and be forgotten about.

-----------------------------------

Four out of five dentists reccomend calling Ebo a girl.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 6:29 AM

Fireflew, bikisdad and those with an IQ:

My last response for now:

As I said, any 'logical' argument that presumes ratings are a factor at F*x is antithetical to the premise. Their primetime lineup is replete with stink-burgers, from a ratings standpoint.

The best hope for a respectable show in overall ratings at F*x is that Rupert Murdoch will someday soon 'shuffle off the mortal coil' and retire to warmer climes, as is surely his due. Then -- hopefully -- the reins of his vast media empire might fall to someone with what I euphemistically refer to as "a soul".

I could go on and on (and on, ad infinitum), but I have more pressing, critical duties to attend. Specifically, rescuing Li'l BillyScummer and his parents from a watery grave.

Luckily, I have a plunger and a plumber's snake...

Yours,

zoid

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 6:30 AM

BIKISDAD

Excuse me, all. I had been assuming that the troll was just a very illogical thinker - maybe a F*X executive. However, after reading the troll's latest post, I think that we are actually dealing with someone who may be "disturbed" in no small way. Best not to engage him directly.

EDIT: Ebo is right. This guy is obviously not playing with a full deck. We should just ignore him. But still, great stuff from Zoid...

Apathy on the Rise. No One Cares.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 6:31 AM

KENADAK

to quote billy:

"or merely make you understand I don’t know"

I fully understand that you, in fact, DO NOT KNOW.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 6:43 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by bikisdad:

EDIT: Ebo is right. This guy is obviously not playing with a full deck. We should just ignore him. But still, great stuff from Zoid...

Apathy on the Rise. No One Cares.

Definitely. Zoid - you are a king amongst men, for thinking of that message and for actually bothering to type it out.

___________________________________
Jayne: "Know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I beat you with till you understand who's in command."

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 6:50 AM

fools do you not understand theory 1 has become more powerful then i ever could of possibly imagined.

Already it has 3 powerful allies theorys 3 4 and 4a

I will try to bring it under control with the help of theory 2 {theory 1 seems to think it is hes arch nemesis]

in the mean time The only thing you can do is try to understand the original theory known as THE theory only by fully understanding it and not complaining about words you think don't exist {i explained the word viced in my second message} do you have any hope of living in peace

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 7:11 AM

A Special Message for BillySlummer:

Welcome to the board! Hope you have enjoyed your stay!

And now, in 'Buffalo' Billy's native tongue:
"Burble, burble, *twitch*, drool, twitch, *smells fingers*! Places cylinder in mouth, *squeezes trigger*, BLAM!" (fade to black)

Sincerely,

Dr. H. Lecter, M.D.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 7:17 AM

EMBERS

Quote:
Originally posted by billyslummer:
i explained the word viced in my second message

deluded little troll, will you also explain the word 'whitch'?

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 8:11 AM

THETHEORY

MORE IGNORANCE MMMMMMMMORE

I NEED IT FOR ENERGY ONLY THEN CAN I DEVICE THE ULTIMATE THEORY THIS THEORY WILL BE THE MASTER THEORY. WHEN ZERO BECOMES ONE WITH GLASS THE TRUE THEORY WILL BE UNLEASED

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMORE ENERGY

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 8:18 AM

NO dont do it theory 1 these people are my friends they have a nickname for me they call me troll.

There tiny brains will not be able to handle the logic of the true theory don't you see by creating the master theory all others will become under its control including you.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 8:43 AM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!

Quote:
billyslummer wrote:
Sunday, September 26, 2004 08:18

There tiny brains will not be able to handle the logic of the true theory don't you see by creating the master theory all others will become under its control including you.

Me fail english? That unpossible!

" They don't like it when you shoot at 'em. I worked that out myself. "

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 9:14 AM

FEMALEJAYNE

Billy dear, I must say this. Get help, it's not funny to even joke about mental disease. Thousands of people are not getting the help the deserve and require. You need some serious help. You are taking this way to seriously. Sure, it is the best tv show ever made, but it's upseting you. calm down! It's alright! You have your rights to say whatever you think about the show or anything else but you do not have the right to belittle anyone who disagrees with you. You did not go about this the best way. You could have given your theory without name calling which makes every reject your theory off hand. It discredits your argument. Intellenget people who want to share ideas do not resort to name calling unless you're in politics. Yes, I realize you will probably call me "stupid" or another name because you cannot think of a rebuttle. But I have said what I wanted without calling you names or insulting your intelegence. You are trying to start a "fight" not an "agruement." "Agruments" have two sides based on facts. Fights are opionions based on feelings. Get help. It's not good to take things so seriously, exspecially the THEORY thing.

With Hope because love is nothing without hope.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 9:25 AM

NNNNNNNoooo! PLEASE DON'T "UNLEASE" THE THEORY! WHO WOULD RENT IT NEXT, WITH ALL THAT EXCREMENT IN THE KITCHEN SINK?!

Your Manager,

zoid (slum lord)

P.S.
Gee, this is fun! C'mon, Theory/BillySimper/Bullethead, now it's your turn. Honestly, it costs a buck to whack the gophers at Chuck E. Cheese (where Billy is an apprentice janitor). This is free, and he squirms so much. Okay, so the gophers are a more intelligent foe, but... Hey! Did I mention it was free?!

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 9:50 AM

SERGEANTX

Is this another one of those pro-Bush threads?

SergeantX

"Dream a little dream or you can live a little dream. I'd rather live it, cause dreamers always chase but never get it." Aesop Rock

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 10:23 AM

SOUPCATCHER

Okay. Since there appears to be room on the bandwagon, count me in

.

Any product that requires manufacturing will not show an immediate profit. You do not make back the initial investment in three months. If this kind of logic had been applied to other business decisions we would not have television.

Now, is there a one to one correlation between television shows and manufactured products such as a television set? Not really. But there's enough overlap for the analogy to hold, IMHO.

Oh, and I add my vote to the suggestion this thread gets moved to Troll Country.

There are three kinds of people: fighters, lovers, and screamers.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 10:39 AM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!

Quote:
Originally posted by SergeantX:
Is this another one of those pro-Bush threads?

SergeantX

"Dream a little dream or you can live a little dream. I'd rather live it, cause dreamers always chase but never get it." Aesop Rock

Billy sounds more like a Pro Kerry type. Making no sense what so ever, but utterly convinced of his own delusion.

" They don't like it when you shoot at 'em. I worked that out myself. "

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 3:17 PM

THEGREYJEDI

Sir, I apologize. You had this box full of correct spelling and punctation on back order. We are truly sorry we did not get it to you in time. We also apologize to anyone else who was injured in the use of the temporary Gerry-rigged spelling and punctuation at Billy's disposal.

Also, your dad issued a recall on your genes, since it seems he ate lead paint chips and drank water from a uranium mine before impregnating his sister-mother to create you. While this is a voluntary recall, it is suggested that you participate for the safety of yourself and those around you.

Futhermore, while your original theory, while projected in a juvenile manner, does hold some water. However, you, shockingly, forgot to include the variables of time slot and directorial input. The reason why Firefly lost money is because Fox didn't give it the chance to make money. But I guess you like dumb bimbos and retard-level acting from "Reality TV."

In closing, I hope you and your sister have a good time making another baby, adding the already dozens of generations of selective inbreeding that is the trademark of your family. And while she swallows yet another portion of your weak, inbred, chromasonally disfunctional, radioactive boy-juice, I hope that latest episode of Survivor is worth the price we all pay for the loss of intelligent programming.

--------------------------------------------------
http://tomeofgrey.blogspot.com

http://www.jed-soft.com Gamer Rigs, Budget Prices

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 3:54 PM

GrayJedi:

Ummm, sorry. Billy's not here anymore. I persuaded him to "lean in and take one for the team", as Dennis Miller once said, proposing that child molesters should off themselves... For the good of the community, y'know?

If only it'd been this easy with Dahmer or Gacy, hmmm?

Still, you've effectively expressed your displeasure with the deceased, through some truly (truly... truly) disturbing imagery. That's the trouble with trolls and evil spirits: They're so infectious...

A final thought on Billy: Makes you reconsider the concept of Reavers, doesn't it?

Soothingly,

zoid

P.S.
He's not really dead. He's probably just gone to church. He'll be back later.
v/r,
zed

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 4:31 PM

Hello zoid no i have not been at church rather i have been fighting theory1 with the help of theory2 however we failed and theory2 was destroyed(it just wasn't able to explain how if theory1 was everywhere how was it growing in size)

I have been trying to find some help from you people to fight theory1 together but it seems all i will find here is petty insults and much much worse the dreaded YOU SPELT _____ WRONG OMG YOR DUMB. It seems it was silly of me to come here at all i should of known you would not understand about the theorys (if you could create your own theorys you wouldn't be here)

very well i will go but first one final piece of advice theory1s greatest strengh is its logic therefore its weakness is inlogic perhaps zoid if you try to explain to it how anything you wrote could ever be classified as insulting or logical or as you put it whacking, theory1 may explode from lack of logic

I will now leave you in piece to deal with the master theory i only hope you can handle it on your own

thank you for your time

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 4:44 PM

STATIC

Boy, this f*ckstick is living proof that it's a bad idea when siblings marry.

You know. . .I realize it's an even MORE juvenile response to such antics, but I really, truly wish I could just find folks like this in person and pound them into a grease spot.

==================================================
"Wash. . .we got some local color happening. A grand entrance would not go amiss."

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 4:49 PM

KELLAINA

Quote:
Originally posted by billyslummer:
It seems it was silly of me to come here at all

I think that would be the general consensus...

Quote:
theory1s greatest strengh is its logic therefore its weakness is inlogic

I have no idea what inlogic is. Do you suppose it's similar to kryptonite?

Quote:

thank you for your time

No, no, thank you.

Sometimes we need a troll around to liven things up

.

If nothing we do matters, then all that matters is what we do. -"Angel"

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 5:05 PM

The Thing That Wouldn't Go Away wrote:

Quote:
I will now leave you in piece to deal with the master theory i only hope you can handle it on your own

It couldn't really have been that easy, could it?

C'mon, THETHEORY, or theory 1, or Plan 9 From Outer Space, or whatever you're calling yourself... Let's hear what you've got to say, next...

I'm guessing ALL CAPS, and crazier than a sh*thouse rat. As an aside to the sane people who may be following the proceedings, I just know this is some pimple-faced, 5th-term juco frosh's attempt at creative writing for English 101 ("third try's the charm", so keep your chin up!)... Fortunately, they put pictures of the food items on the register keys at McDonald's, so his/her/its future career won't be dependent upon linguistic skills...

Expectantly,

zoid

P.S.
It's just like shooting fish in a barrel... But, I'll administer the coup de grace soon. Heh, heh! Dumbass brought a penknife to a sword fight.

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 7:35 PM

CHEYENNECM

Ladies and gentlemen I sincerely suggest not writing another word to this thread. At the risk of sounding unkind, Billyslummer is not a well and balanced individual. Go to this site and you will see what I mean.

http://www.drunkduck.com/thestabbining/

Please let this thread fade away. And, Billy, please speak with someone about your angsts.

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~
"If the snow on the roof is too heavy then the ceiling will cave in. His brains are in terrible danger."
~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 7:59 PM

THEGREYJEDI

Quote:
Originally posted by billyslummer:
the dreaded YOU SPELT _____ WRONG OMG YOR DUMB.

And punctuation. Don't forget the punctuation. It puts pauses in your words so the reader doesn't run out of breath just from reading it. Like this.

Spelling and punctuation you buck-toothed, father-raping, sister-breeding, cow-siring, sow-slurping, tree-humping, sheep-loving, fox-executive-petting, rapcore-listening, heehaw-looking, knuckle-dragging, pedophile-endorsing, satan-worshiping, macaroni-shalacking, piss-swilling, feces-licking, bottom-feeding, scum-sucking, grandma-pleasing, self-propagating, man-fondling, computer-violating, anus-penetrating, crotch-sniffing, pit-dwelling, dirt-eating, malodious PEASANT! Know your place!

--------------------------------------------------
http://tomeofgrey.blogspot.com

http://www.jed-soft.com Gamer Rigs, Budget Prices

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 8:41 PM

JUKO

Yeah... spelling and proper, grammatically-correct sentences. And an IQ boost of about a hundred points... y'know, so he stops licking doorknobs and such.

I can only conclude from struggling to decipher his rather... unique... interpretation of the English language, his complete inability to grasp the simplest logic, and the fact that he obviously used a thesaurus rather extensively without using a dictionary... or at the very least, a spell-checker, that this... fellow... has pushed a few too many marbles up his nose. I truly hope he finds happiness, or at the very least a nice colouring book.

Does Blue Sun sponser the Blue Man Group?

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Sunday, September 26, 2004 10:53 PM

MANTICHORUS

If you're going to try and set-up a 'logical' theory, billy m'boy, try using a template of a real theory.
From the following theory, I deduce that we are in a simulation, and you are a glitch in the program...
http://www.simulation-argument.com/simulation.html

Waiting for billyslummer to be corrected...

__________________________________________________
"The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it's indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it's indifference." -Elie Wiesel, quoted in US News World Report.

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Monday, September 27, 2004 6:33 AM