Idiots guide to Firefly by SliceandDice

GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Idiots guide to Firefly

POSTED BY: SLICEANDDICE
UPDATED: Friday, October 6, 2006 21:41
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VIEWED: 2576
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Thursday, October 5, 2006 5:18 AM

This is something i was working on for fun. Things that you learn from watching firefly/serenity and that a new-comer might like to know..... add to it or fix my mistacts if you please....

Serenity is a Firefly model 03-K64, a model that has long since been discontinued and is generally considered by people as a piece of go-se or fei-oo …unless they are a scavenger…

Don’t ever call serenity apiece of go-se or fei-oo in front of any the crewmembers.

Doing the above will only lead to badness

Whenever you leave the ship, gunfire or fighting is going to occur pretty defiantly.

If you fell comfortable on serenity, you aren’t going to fit in anywhere else, so you might not want to piss off the captain.

If you have sex, and aren’t married, someone is going to be jealous

If your job is going okay, good, simple, or easy you're about to die.

All bad guys either have a funny accent or have a hat.

The exception is ‘the hands of blue’ men.

If you ever get an invitation to a government school you never heard of before, Don’t accept, Ever, No really, Don’t

If you get a strange crate wait to open it, someone might want what is in it and opening it right away will just increase the odds of him or her finding you.

If said crate holds the body of a war body, hold off on the autopsy.

If you let people you don’t know on your ship, or even the ones you do know, at least one of them is going to try to kill you or at least keep you imprisoned for a undetermined amount of time.

If your mechanic says something need to be replaced soon, just do it, if you don’t something bad is going to happen at the worst possible time.

If it looks like you finally got a big pay day either A) you will end up being attacked and most likely eaten by reavers, B) Be imprisoned by the alliance, C) end up captured and tortured by a former contact or D) unable to sell booty/finish the job.

If you get the job from Badger, it's probably gonna suck, unless it don't, but that's 'cause you got into a fight with a rich-boy.

Disgruntled former soldiers and companions don't mix, however classy doctors and greasy mechanics do.

If you don’t see Inara and Mal arguing its either a trap or something equally as bad.

Don’t call Inara a whore.

No really don’t

If you do call Inara a whore, and she over hears you, you’re going to get an ear full, and if Mal over hears you, you’re going to get beaten up.

Don’t ever make shot Kaylee, make her cry or just be mean to her. There’s always a man around who will either kick your ass to hell and back or at least humiliate in a public ruining your reputation.

Don’t be surprised if the doctor says something stupid or just plan wrong, He just not good at that kind of stuff.

If you wake in the morning with a wife, just lock her up in a room. Don’t trust her.

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Thursday, October 5, 2006 5:29 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.

This is more an "Everything I need to know about life" than an "Idiot's Guide"
And I think it's 'definitely' rather than 'defiantly'

http://www.bigdamnthankyou.com - show Universal your gratitude!

We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow in sunlight. - Gautama Siddharta

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Thursday, October 5, 2006 6:02 AM

TPAGE

I like the list, although spelling could use some work.

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Thursday, October 5, 2006 11:26 AM

SHROUDED

Grinned throughout the entire thing - though, like the others said, could use a bit of revising. But I'm not complaining.

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The only animals I'm not comfortable with are parrots, but I'm learning as I go. I'm getting better and better at 'em. I really am. - Steve Irwin, our Honorary BDH

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Thursday, October 5, 2006 11:53 AM

MSG

made me smile...thanks

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2

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Thursday, October 5, 2006 11:55 AM

SHINYTRINKET

Funny, funny stuff!

*************************************************
The 3 rules of aging:
1. Never bypass a bathroom
2. Never waste an erection
3. Never trust a fart

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Thursday, October 5, 2006 11:55 AM

DESKTOPHIPPIE

Yeah, gave me a giggle too

More graphics available at www.desktophippie.com - yes, I've moved!

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Friday, October 6, 2006 9:41 PM

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA

Quote:
Originally posted by SliceandDice:

If your mechanic says something need to be replaced soon, just do it, if you don’t something bad is going to happen at the worst possible time.

As a mechanic(in training), I can't agree more.
I could tell you some horror stories that were caused by simple lack of even the most basic of maintenance.

---------------------------------------------
How many Jaynes does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to try to put it in and another to find a bigger hammer.

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