Mr. Wonderful is kind of boring by beatupplenty

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Mr. Wonderful is kind of boring

POSTED BY: BEATUPPLENTY
UPDATED: Wednesday, November 3, 2010 14:20
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VIEWED: 5189
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Tuesday, October 26, 2010 9:29 AM

OK I really love the idea...but I can see where the drawer comes in. After a while who wants that much support?
HUGS

To love someone is to see a miracle invisible to others.
--Francois Mauriac
It's fuzzy-minded liberal thinking like that that gets you eaten.

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Tuesday, October 26, 2010 11:39 AM

ZEEK

Isn't the lesson that if you say the right thing all the time you're boring and get dumped in a drawer after a little while? Gotta change it up once in a while by getting in trouble for partying with the boys all night and missing your anniversary. That's what keeps you out of the drawer.

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Tuesday, October 26, 2010 12:12 PM

ZEEK

Yes, it's the either the lack of trust or the overly neediness that is the source of the "trouble" but neither are our fault.

edit: well unless there was already an incident or something that makes the lack of trust warranted.

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Wednesday, October 27, 2010 3:19 AM

ZEEK

Quote:
Originally posted by beatupplenty:
I agree there is definitely a trust issue. Just out of curiosity how often do you and your friends go out minus the women?

Once or twice a year lol

That's if you don't count weekly poker night. They're invited. They just rarely ever want to play. Well actually they're invited to Halloween at the local hot waitresses restaurant too. So, maybe once a year if there's a guy movie we all really want to see. Which is very rare considering how awful hollywood is these days.

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Wednesday, October 27, 2010 4:24 AM

ZEEK

Quote:
Originally posted by beatupplenty:
I can't see where there would be a problem with that. I thought you were going to say something like, "Every week we go out and get plowed."
There is a trust issue. But it isn't that they don't trust you. They don't trust the women out there and they are worried about you with alcohol diminishing inhibitions and judgment. What can happen when all of those things get together. Remember that the next time your woman seems a little cranky on guys night out.

Well first I have to get a gf again for that to matter

I'm just talking more in general.

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Wednesday, October 27, 2010 7:01 AM

AVERYFINECOMPANION

No to rock the boat, but I think the "I dont trust the OTHER people" is a cop out.

I've been out with friends and verrry drunk and I still knew to say "no thanks". If you drink so bad your inhibitions are that off maybe instead of "out with the guys" you should be going "out to AA".

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Wednesday, October 27, 2010 7:05 AM

STEGASAURUS

One could only WISH for a "Guy's Night Out".

I could write a book (from my own male perspective, of course) in regards to the trust issues that arise between men and women.

Once. Just once, I wish my wife would say something supportive or nice about me. But until that day happens, I have a gorgeous baby boy to keep my days bright.

-Steg

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Wednesday, October 27, 2010 12:52 PM

ZEEK

So, there was a debate on the radio a while back where a guy called in asking who was right and who was wrong in an argument between him and his wife. The argument was over Mardi Gras. He had a yearly tradition of going to Mardi Gras with his high school buddies. His wife thought that now that he was married he shouldn't go.

His reasoning was: wtf you knew this was a tradition. Why do I have to stay home just because we got married?

Her reasoning (according to him) was: he should be more mature now. We're starting our own family and he shouldn't want to go out with the boys getting drunk and looking at drunk girls taking their tops off.

If that was really the argument I totally side with the guy. That is totally harmless. He's not going there to cheat. He's going to hang out with his old friends and be immature for a while. It's just for fun and just because he see some other woman's boobs he's not any less in love.

The women who called in to tell him he shouldn't go were using arguments like "you shouldn't go because it's upsetting to your wife and you should want to make her happy." That's a terrible argument IMO. That's just playing games of seeing how much control you can have over someone. There needs to be reasoning and understanding if someone is supposed to change their mind about something.

OK enough ranting about that. I just think that some of those types of situations are one or the other person building something up in their mind and over reacting.

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Wednesday, October 27, 2010 1:21 PM

CYBERSNARK

See, my argument would be "why not go to Mardi Gras with your wife?" If she's not the one you wanna spend your spare time around, then why did you marry her?

-----
We applied the cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient.

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Wednesday, October 27, 2010 3:56 PM

CYBERSNARK

Quote:
Originally posted by beatupplenty:
Me personally--I would not interfere with an established tradition unless I was asked to come post bail.

Well, y'know the old saying.

A friend will get you out of jail. Your best friend will be in there with you.

-----
We applied the cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient.

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Thursday, October 28, 2010 3:50 AM

ZEEK

I don't know about bringing his wife along. That might turn out even worse. I mean she'd have to know that it's a tradition thing and that there's probably stuff they "always" do and she wouldn't really get a say at all. That can lead to even more problems with hurt feelings and frustration on both sides.

It's sorta like how I am with my mom and brother. They have been tagging along with me and my friends when I go back to college for homecoming each year. Which is fine as long as they understand that we're going to do what we're going to do and they don't really have a say in any of it. They're welcome to tag along. Not to take over.

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Thursday, October 28, 2010 4:59 AM

AGENTROUKA

If a woman trusts her husband, she'll probably be okay with him going where "temptation" might dwell. If she doesn't trust him, there is really zero point in pointing out what is tradition or what's right in principle. Because there are much, much bigger issues in the marriage. Those can't be solved with logic.

Actually, why do people get married who don't know each other well enough to be in agreement about Mardi Gras traditions? Seriously!

As for Mr. Wonderful: if you're putting him in the drawer because you're bored, he's obviously NOT Mr. Wonderful, just Mr. One-Note-Supportive.

There's plenty of ways to be wonderful without being boring - without resorting to being upsetting.

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Thursday, October 28, 2010 11:22 PM

AGENTROUKA

I was mainly referring to that Mardi Gras example, not to you, beatupplenty!

The doll is a sweet idea and it obviously gives you joy so there is nothing wrong with that, at all.

I'm not sure why you thought I meant to offend your marriage, but I definitely didn't intend to.

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Friday, October 29, 2010 11:18 AM

AVERYFINECOMPANION

Maybe its been mentioned before, but why doesn't wife go out with HER friends while the husband is out?

How fun would it be to start a little tradition of Vegas or Disney with the girls or whatever it is you cookey married people do...

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Friday, October 29, 2010 12:07 PM

ZEEK

I would think a group of married people could go to vegas and have a good time splitting into guy and girl groups once there. There's so much shopping for the women. Guys can lose their money gambling and girls can lose their money shopping. The girls at least have something when they leave.

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Monday, November 1, 2010 6:26 AM

ZEEK

Quote:
Originally posted by beatupplenty:
Zeek you know women have more outside interests than just shopping, right?

Yes, I know about the eating massive quantities of chocolate as well.

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Monday, November 1, 2010 11:14 AM

LILI

Doing it backwards. Walking up the downslide.

Quote:
Originally posted by Zeek:
Well first I have to get a gf again for that to matter

I'm sure everyone here is just shocked that you don't have one.

Facts are stubborn things.

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Monday, November 1, 2010 11:15 AM

ZEEK

It's up to you, but I'd include hair, makeup, shoes, fashion, etc all under the "shopping" umbrella.

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Monday, November 1, 2010 12:36 PM

ZEEK

Late 20's to early 30's. You shouldn't pigeon hole entire age groups. It's rarely correct and they could take offense.

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Monday, November 1, 2010 1:25 PM

STEGASAURUS

Interestingly, this past weekend my wife and I were planning to go out into Reno during the Halloween parties. We got a babysitter and everything. Unfortunately, my wife got sick and made it clear she was not interested in going out.

Jokingly, I said, "that's ok, Honey. I can go out by myself."

I said it jokingly, because I KNEW what her reaction would be. I was CLEARLY just poking fun, but as usual her response was terse and serious:

"If you go, I'll have the locks changed before you make it out of the driveway!"

*le sigh*

And this is what I get for not having a fit for her 5 hour "all by herself" ladies night that she had three weeks ago. By the way, all of the ladies she invited bowed out. So she literally was out by herself for 5 hours, never told me where she went or who she was with and came home 10 sheets to the wind.

Life is awesome, eh?

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Monday, November 1, 2010 1:34 PM

LILI

Doing it backwards. Walking up the downslide.

My partner and I have a great deal of mutual love and respect.

Make what you will of the fact that we're both women.

Facts are stubborn things.

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Monday, November 1, 2010 1:42 PM

STEGASAURUS

Sometimes it can be fun and exciting. When she's not on one of her depressive lows and I'm not trying to assert myself as an adult in our relationship. Otherwise, no. Not so much.

And that's a great question. I'd hazard a guess to say "no", simply because I haven't found it in any relation I've had. This is not to say that I have always been perfect, but every relationship is new and each time I've tried to find that one little piece of perfection (or as close to) and everytime I've been sorely disappointed.

Bleh.

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Monday, November 1, 2010 1:54 PM

STEGASAURUS

Yeah, eventually she'll come around.

Right?

Because we both decided third time's the charm. This is both our third marriages. And we agreed divorce is not an option.

However I'm learning that she does not give much credit to promises, contracts or vows. So who knows. But like I've said before, my mini-me is my primary focus when things start to go wonky. He'll always be worth it.

-Steg

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Tuesday, November 2, 2010 4:18 AM

ZEEK

Oh no offense taken. My silence was just life getting in the way of getting back online.

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Tuesday, November 2, 2010 2:15 PM

LILI

Doing it backwards. Walking up the downslide.

Shouldn't apologize for calling a spade a spade.

Facts are stubborn things.

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Tuesday, November 2, 2010 8:15 PM

BORIS

Ugh!...to be honest I like a bit of flaw in my menfolk...i'd probably do something a little more extreme than putting the thing in a drawer in a drawer... I am of course talking about "Mr Wonderful"

Rose S

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Wednesday, November 3, 2010 2:20 PM

AVERYFINECOMPANION

Sorry Zeek, apparently I'm the the only one here that got it....

It's starting to sound like "The View" in here. Lets go to the cooler threads where there is sports talk, hunting, fixing broken things around the house and scratching various body parts.

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