Title: Ruffles Character, Pairings: Jaylee, Crew Rating: PG Set: During the episode Shindig A/N: I was doing some graphic work when I saw a screencap of Jayne looking at Kaylee while she is utterly entranced by that big fluffy dress. WARNING: Very fluffy fic. Practically cotton candy (it's because my BIG fic is so dark and angsty right now).

Persephone was always full of shiney new things, things that you could have, if you paid enough coin.

Kaylee's eyes'd lit up like stars goin supernova when she'd seen that dress. To her it had looked absolutely perfect, the kind of dress a perfect Kaylee would wear. The kind of Kaylee that people thought of as pretty or even beautiful, not the kind of Kaylee who fixed machines and got dirty. A Kaylee that Simon would notice and love. A Kaylee like Inara.

Jayne saw the look she got in her eyes when that dress'd come into view. There was an innocent delight in them and also a deep wanting. He couldn't understand why somebody'd want a dress, of all things, so bad.

Then Jayne realized that he'd only seen Kaylee in one dress ever, the tatty pink one she'd probably out-grown at 14. He pictured Kaylee wearing the big thing, buried in ruffles. She wouldn't look sexy in it but she'd look damned cute.

"What would you do in that rig anyway? Flounce around the engine room? Be like a sheep walking on it's hind legs!" Mal said irritably.

Jayne immediately pictured a sheep walking around the engine room in a dress. He snorted loudly. Kaylee's face fell and she gave both of them a hard look, trying to be mad but looking only like she was going to cry.

Zoe, for her part was furious. She knew what it was like to be considered barely female. Hell, if anyone in the whole 'Verse knew it was Zoe Washburne. Maybe that was why she had taken Wash's name, knowing full-well he would have put up no fight if she had kept hers. Sometimes she felt like he was the only thing that kept her a woman, what with the captain being so tetchy about women and prefering to practically think of them as men. She didn't want little Kaylee to feel guilty that she was a woman and not a man. Jayne laughing at Mals stupid joke didn't help matters at all.

Angrily she took the rucksack out of Mals hands. "See you back on the ship, Captain."

As the two of them took off with Wash, Jayne was damned near bewildered. "What are they, mad or somethin?"

*****

Work usually preoccupied him, but Badger was practically licking their balls at this point so Jayne let his mind wander. He sipped the spiked tea and thought of Kaylee and her dress. That hurt look she'd shot him for laughin made him feel like a right hundan. Jayne was scratching his head as to how to make it up to her.

He could always buy her the dresss couldn't he? But then when would she wear it? That'd be a damn good waste of coin, and Jayne hated wastin coin when it could be spent on himself. Maybe he could find another dress, something sexier....?

Badger's words pulled him out of his reverie.

"...of a testicle. 'Course I managed to get my hands on a pair." Mal looked at Jayne, even though he was the less dirty-minded of the two. At least, most of the time. They cracked up over this, neither of them payin much mind to the cockney rat who'd cheated them out of good coin more then once.

"Of invites!" Badger snapped peevishly.

***** "Hey Mal," Jayne said as he and the captain walked back to Serenity.

"What is it Jayne?"

"Who is't you're gonna be taking with you to this hootenanny?"

Mal looked at him with a small grin on his face.

"Hootenanny?"

"Whatever!" Jayne came close to clockin Mal for making some dumb crack about the way he talked. He had a point to make and Mal was dancing around just to piss him off it seemed like.

"Well I was planning on takin Zoe. Why? You wanna get all spiffed up and be my date?"

Jayne glared.

"Okay, what is it?" Mal didn't want the merc to get too riled at him, despite the fun it was screwing with him.

"I want you to take Kaylee."

Mal was taken aback. He had been expecting...well he didn't know what he'd been expecting. Certainly not this.

"Think about it 'fore you say no. Kaylee's real pretty and sweet, you probably won't run into too much trouble at some fancy party and she'll have the time o' her life. "

Mal looked at Jayne, somewhere between shock and trying to tell if he was kidding. "Somehow I feel that there's more to this then you're letting on." Mal said.

Jayne looked square at him. "I'm gonna buy her that dress. Not gonna tell her it was me neither. She wants it so damn bad, God knows why, and I intend to give it to her. Now I just want to make sure she's got somewhere to wear it too."

Mal was definately in shock.

*****

Jayne handed the clerk all the money he'd brought with him.

"Would you like this wrapped up?" the clerk asked.

Jayne pictured himself giving her the package the ruffles contained and hidden by bright gold foil. Her face'd glow with happiness. He saw her tear off the paper. She'd throw her arms around him when she saw that dress. She'd squeal in his ear -

"No thank you. Just bag it up for me will ya?"

*****

"Kaylee? Kaylee."

"I'm not speaking to you Cap'n."

"Got no need to speak. Got a job for you."

*****

He laid the dress out on the kitchen table, smoothing the skirt over the wood. He heard Mal going to get Kaylee and sprinted to his bunk.

*****

Kaylee bounced up and down when she saw the ruffles spilling all over the table.

Wash and Zoe were headed back to their bunk when they saw the big commotion in the kitchen. Zoe spied Jayne standing on the top rung of his bunk, watching Kaylee hugging the dress to her. She had a peculiar feeling about the look on his face, but her idea seemed irrational, especially about Jayne. Besides, it was none of her buisness.

*****

A couple of hours after Mal and Kaylee'd left, Book initiated a game of Tall Card with Jayne and Simon. "Can we play for chores?" Jayne asked. "I'm a little light on coin."

*****

Kaylee'd been flirting all night. Ever since that nice old gentleman had sent of those gold-plated bitches who'd made fun of her beautiful dress.

She practically floated to the powder room.

"Miss?"

She turned to see a caterer holding a tray of little shrimp on toothpicks. "Oh no, thank you." Kaylee said sweetly.

"No miss. There's something on your dress. Right there." He pointed to the third tier of ruffles on her skirt.

Kaylee saw the odd-looking mark. A grease mark, like the kind you'd get from oiling a gun...

*****

When Badgers men had come back with Kaylee, Jayne'd finally gotten to take a good look at her in the damned thing.

She looked like a big pink cake: delicious.

*****

"So'd you have a good time?"

Jayne and Kaylee were waiting while the others planned their daring rescue of Mal. She smiled at him. It was the polar opposite of the look she'd given him that morning.

"Yes I did Jayne. Thank you for asking."

They grinned at each other, the formality becoming a joke.

"What did you do while I was out and about?"

"I oiled up Vera and Boomer. Took 'em apart and cleaned my ladies. Why?"

"Oh, no reason. You wanna make me up some coffee?"

END