Our story so far- Lola is River's twin, and Elphaba (Elphie) is the Tam's half sister. Elphie's mother was Lola's surrogate. Elphie is thirteen and Lola is a few months younger than River...

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Inara was waiting in the kitchen for Mal when Jayne stomped through, giving her a significant glance. “What?” she asked, miffed. “I kinda need your help,” he growled. “What am I sposed to say to River ‘bout all this?” “You could start by asking how she feels about it,” Inara responded hesitantly. She hadn’t ever talked to Jayne alone before, and she was silently looking for an easy out. “Then?” “Just let her talk about how she feels about this. Don’t you two talk?” “We talk ‘bout guns, an’ about how to kill people, or how to injure people, and sometimes we talk about other stuff….But this is different. She has a clone…as in, her exact looks an’ everything…..Hell, I’d be needin’ someone to talk to,” Jayne said. Inara eyed him with wonder. “Just let her talk, and listen….She’ll know if you don’t,” warned Inara. “And not just because she’s psychic- girls are born knowing when someone isn’t listening.” Jayne muttered a thanks and ambled to his bunk. “Givin’ advice to my mercenary?” Mal asked. “Maybe. Kaylee wants me to do her hair, so I’ll make this quick- I might be behind on the rent for awhile,” Inara informed him. “Why? You don’t even know where we’re goin’ yet,” Mal pointed out, bewildered. “You can get a job on Persephone, can’t you?” “I won’t be getting any jobs, Mal. The Guild has….Well, I’m being retired. I could always whore myself, then you’d be right about something,” Inara explained bitterly. “Whoa, now, ‘Nara, why’d you get fired?” Mal grabbed her shoulders gently. “Because, first of all, my part in the whole Miranda ordeal did not win me any favors. Mal, the Alliance has put a black mark on me. The Guild has no choice,” Inara replied, tears threatening to escape. “So I might be looking for work, but I can’t leave Serenity, Mal, not again.” “You could move into one of the passenger bunks, leave the shuttle free. That way you could stay aboard and I could still make some sort of profit,” Mal suggested. “You have another shuttle,” she complained. “Which I need for jobs.” “Take passengers…Mal, please, I’ll figure something out. I have money, but I don’t want to go into my savings until there are no other options.” “Alright, but if more’n five months go by and you got nothin’, you’re moving to a bunk until you can give me even one month’s rent, got it?” Inara nodded happily, and Mal smiled. “Great…Will you have time for my hair?” “Maybe later.”

**

Mal let the River lookalike out reluctantly, Zoe hanging over his shoulder. Lola stepped out of the room delicately and looked around. “Nice ship,” she said. “I meant to tell you the first time you talked to me, but you rushed off. I like to ride in a Firefly.” “Huh,” Mal grunted, studying Zoe. She had dark circles under her eyes, and she looked like she hadn’t slept in days. She looked weary and battle worn, but since they hadn’t done anything the past few days, he was at a loss. “Can I have some food?” asked Lola, turning to face him with big brown eyes so like River’s, but they held a different emotion. Instead of warmth, there was a longing. Instead of a loving affection, there was coldness. The only thing he recognized in her swimmingly large brown eyes was the pain, the hurt than radiated through her very being. “Sure, there’s some protein crackers there, and Inara made tea,” Mal finally said. “Lola!” came a squeal of delight, and the thirteen year old girl cam flying to wrap her arms around Lola’s neck.

Mal finally got a good look at Elphaba, and he noted with a degree of satisfaction that she looked like one of his already. She had long, sun streaked brown hair, a ton of freckles, and startling blue eyes. She was wearing a long, purple tiered skirt, a black tank top, black platform combat boots, a brown hoodie that had wound up tossed in a kitchen chair, and on one hand she had a red fingerless grappling glove. He could see a flash of tight knee length blue biker shorts as she twirled about, but he glimpsed with a smile the outline of a gun strapped around her thigh underneath that skirt. “Cap’n, I want to stay. On this ship. With you guys,” Elphaba said hesitantly. “I’m agreeable to that, long as you don’t turn that cute little gun ‘round your thigh on us, nor that pretty blue handled knife in your boot,” Mal said, and the teenager laughed. “Noticed those, did ya?” Elphie giggled. “But you didn’t pick up on the chopsticks in my hair being steel, and sharpened to a very deadly point, nor the fact I have a grenade sealed in the hollow rubber heel of my boot.” “You are a very thorough girl, aren’t you?” Mal laughed. “It’s just creepy, Cap, that girl’s armed to the teeth. She has on spiked rings underneath that glove,” Jayne pointed out from the doorway. “Why are you-?” Mal asked, but she shrugged. “I used to work for a guy called Badger, takin’ whatever fair jobs he had on Persephone. Thirteen and I’m the one he calls when he wants something stolen,” Elphie explained. “I’ve fought grown men three times my size before, and won. It’s a gift.” “It’s a sign that you’re insane,” commented Simon, coming down to smile at his new sister. “Not new, just new to you,” Elphie said, poking warily at the bowl of congealed protein that had been left from dinner last night. “Um, what exactly was this?” “Goop,” responded River with a smile. “Why has no one made breakfast yet?” “’Cuz it’s Kaylee’s turn,” answered Jayne, trudging along behind River. “Is not!” the girl herself protested, crossing her arms over her coveralls. “I cooked breakfast yesterday.” Zoe watched all this silently, wondering how she could even let herself think about taking their lives in exchange for her husbands. She saw River and Elphie exchange a glance, and both kept glancing at her throughout the meal. There was no doubt they knew what was going on. “I’ll make it, okay?” Simon finally exclaimed, throwing his hands up in disgust. Zoe smiled to herself sadly.

**

Zoe was sitting alone on her bed when the two girls ganged up on her. “If you turn on us, we will kill you.” “Elphie, you know she won’t,” River said reproachfully. “Don’t make it sound like she’s a monster. You need to tell the rest of them about this. Captain is already thinking on ways to rescue Wash. You aren’t the only one.” “Was I actually ever considering killing you?” Zoe asked. “I know your mind better than you do. You wouldn’t have, even if you prepared to, you couldn’t,” River answered. The two girls vanished like smoke, trickling away until there was nothing left. Zoe shook her head.

**

Lola and Jayne were alone in the kitchen, glaring at each other from opposite ends of the table. Lola’s fingers were twitching for a gun, and Jayne felt the same. “Don’t know what she see’s in you,” snorted Lola. “Why are you on this ship?” snarled Jayne under his breath. Elphie and River were on one of the platforms above the cargo bay, their legs dangling over the edge above empty space. Elphie was swinging her legs cheerily, but River was listening to Jayne and Lola. “They’re so alike…..Looks like me but isn’t…….They are both suspicious, sometimes uncaring criminals….There’s the difference, though….Jayne cares,” River mumbled to herself, Elphie happily accepting her ramblings. “Not afraid he’ll fall for her, are you?” Elphie teased. “No!” River protested. “That’d be the day,” muttered Elphie. “When you get jealous and catty, the whole ‘verse’ll go to hell.” **

Simon dropped heavily into Kaylee’s bunk and glanced with a wry smile at the pink layer cake- no, wait, that was the dress- hanging from the ceiling. “Oh, hey, Simon!” she said cheerily, her head shoved in a trunk. He could hear her rummaging around for something and he shook his head with a smile. “What are you looking for?” he asked, laughing as her rear end wiggled enticingly. “Oh, nothin’, just tryin’ to find a pair of pants for Lola. I keep a lot of clothes I wouldn’t even think about wearing, you know that? Look at this!” She held up a black miniskirt that had black netting draped over it. “I dunno what it is, but I collect stuff like this just in case….Now I have someone to give some of it to.” Kaylee dropped the skirt and tugged out a plain white tank top and a pair of baggy black shorts, and Simon gasped at them. “Are those men’s?” “Yeah, I guess so….She needs these, too,” Kaylee murmured, digging around for a pair of plain white combat boots. “I’m sure she’ll like these.” “Isn’t she already wearing clothes?” Simon pointed out. “That was the uniform the Alliance had her in. Here we go….” Kaylee pulled a black cotton military out of the trunk and slammed it shut. “What’s up?” “We’ve been together for four months, right?” Simon asked reluctantly. Kaylee glanced at him apprehensively and he laughed, which just made her more skittish. “Bao bei, I’m not leaving you.” “Be careful whatcha say there, ‘cuz top three percent an’ all you still act like an alien,” Kaylee warned him. “Well…I know this is slightly premature, but-,” he began, grabbing her hand and dropping to one knee, “Will you marry me?” “Oh, wow, didn’t see that one comin’,” growled Jayne from the doorway above. “Just give me the gorramn clothes and answer him.” “’Course I’ll marry you!” she laughed, and Simon stood up happily. “Y’all start getting’ mushy, I’ll toss ya out the airlock,” Jayne threatened before he disappeared.

**

“Getting married. Didn’t see that one coming,” muttered River as Jayne walked into the common area. “That sarcasm, little Crazy?” he asked, dropping the bundle of clothes on the table, carefully avoiding the bowl of noodles River was helping herself to. “Can I have some?” “Thanks for the clothes….These boots are great,” Lola said, holding one of the said boots up. “Can I have some gorramn noodles?” Jayne demanded. “Go ahead…” River mumbled. Lola disappeared for a few seconds and came back, dressed, and with a black holster slung across her hips, one of Elphie’s smaller guns tucked discreetly on one side. “Look like one of the crew,” noted River. “Well, I’m not. I’m leaving in a few weeks, when we reach Persephone. Elphie…I get that she needs to stay here, but I already feel sort of like a….eighth wheel,” Lola told River. “I understand,” River said, studying her clone. “Not ready to feel…”

**

Zoe had been lurking around, watching everyone and wondering whether or not River was wrong. Zoe had the training to be an emotionless robot in war, training that Wash had managed to wear down. But what would Wash say if he knew she had murdered their family? “This is the Captain-,” a voice over the com began, but River bellowed from the kitchen. “No! We thought it was terrifying space monkeys!” she yelled. “Hey, I heard that! Anyway, I need everybody, including Lola and Elphie, on the bridge. We need to talk about how to get Wash.”