This is the fourth part of the Amateur series, I’m sadly stuck on the third, in which Simon and Kaylee agree to get together later (presumably after she freshens up) -- Simon talks over everything with Mal, and learns that River has a crush on Jayne. There might also be some Zoe/Wash tension over the fact that there’s going to be a baby on board that isn’t hers.

I’ve got a couple of “fatherhood” things kicking around in my head that I’d like to get in, as well as couple of comments where Simon realizes that he’s actually got a lot more out here than he would in the core, which we’re to presume was pretty much all work and no play. The only dialogue that I’ve managed for that though is the following, in which Simon is told about River’s crush. Unsure if they tell him this just to give him a hard time and ruin his good mood. Also unsure who Simon should be having this conversation with..

_________: River’s startin’ to crush on Jayne Simon: That’s because River is crazy. __________: Jayne might have a soft spot for her too Simon: Probably because River is crazy __________: But you won’t allow it….. Simon: Because River is crazy Wash: (Gasping for air) Too…..much…..irony…….Can’t….breathe!! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh well, here’s part 4. Any help would be appreciated

At Mme Huan’s -- In a well-appointed guest room

Simon is fully dressed, sitting on the bed, clearly nervous. Kaylee comes out of what we assume is the bathroom wearing something that’s clearly intended to be sexy/sophisticated. It’s not bad, but it’s not quite working for her.

Kaylee (Strikes pose) : I’m ready for my examination Dr. Tam Simon (Winces, holds up a hand in protest) No…I’m sorry…that’s…that’s just wrong. Kaylee (Worried. Looks at outfit): What? Simon: No, you look lovely, but “examination” and “Dr Tam”…that’s just not sexy at all. A doctor can’t ever have … a relationship …with one of his patients. Kaylee: But you’re always a doctor. Simon: But you’re rarely my patient. To have sex with someone you’re seeing clinically is….it’s an abuse of power and trust. It would be like…having sex with a minor. Kaylee: (Sits next to him) What’s wrong with miners? Simon (Confused for a sec) No no, a minor, someone under 18. Kaylee (Smiles mischievously) What’s wrong with that? Simon (Smiles, shakes head) I keep forgetting who I’m talking too. I dunno, it’s… the doctor patient relationship…it’s sacred . Kaylee: Like church? Simon: Exactly, you wouldn’t have sex in a church right? Kaylee: Does the coatroom count? Simon (Laughing) Again, I keep forgetting who I’m talking to. What, no room up on the alter? Kaylee: (Smiling) Didn’t occur to me at the time. But I have always had a thing for flowers and candles now that you mention it (Starts thinking about something else)……..Wonder if Shepherd will baptize him. Simon: (Changing gears) The baby? Sure. We can do anything you want. Kaylee: (Worried) Is this baby in for a world of trouble? Simon: (Joking) On Serenity? I think that’s a guarantee. (Stops Joking) I mean, Serenity isn’t exactly kid-friendly. Kaylee (Offended): Serenity is plenty friendly. Except for the cargo bay…..and the engine room… and the bridge… Simon: (Smiles) Which leaves what, the lounge? Okay, so we paint the lounge pink and replace the couch with a crib. It’ll be lovely. Kaylee: (Smiles at the thought of it) Put up some pictures of big teddy bears and it’ll look just like Jayne’s room. Simon (Smiles) If I live to be 100 I never want to see the inside of Jayne’s room (Suddenly a little worried)….have you? Kaylee: Seen the inside of Jayne’s room? Of course, for the couplings. Simon (Confused. Taken aback) Kaylee: (Confused) What? (Gets it) You got a dirty mind! The access panel for some of the drive couplings is in Jayne’s room. Simon: (Sheepish) Sorry, that’s just not how I’m used to hearing that word. Kaylee: (Smiles) Well then I guess it’s good that the “power shaft” and the “grappling lube” is in your room. Simon: Really? (Smug smile) Well that might explain some of the dreams I’ve been having. Kaylee: Runs right under the floor panels……(becomes lost in thought) Simon: Everything okay? Kaylee (begins to get dressed) I just realized I got to check on something. Won’t take too long. Simon: But it’s midnight….it’s dark…the ship is all the way… Kaylee (keeps getting ready without giving any thought to Simon’s objections) Simon: …..Can I go with you? Kaylee (Smile) Yeah, that’d be shiny. You can even help. ---------------------------------------------------- Simon and Kaylee pull up on the mule in front of the cargo bay doors. Simon is driving… poorly….and we can just hear her instructions over the engine. Despite the mule’s bucking etc. they’re enjoying themselves.

They both get off the mule and start walking to the ship. Kaylee stops Simon and positions him at a certain spot with regards to the ship.

Simon: What are you doing? I thought I was going to help. Kaylee: You get to help, I promise. I need you to stand here and tell me what you see. Simon: Okay (Scans ship) what am I looking for? Kaylee: You’ll know it when you see it. So just stay right there.. Simon: Okay. Kaylee ( jogs inside) Simon (Waits, looks all over Serenity) Kaylee: (Shouting from inside the ship) Anything yet? Simon: No. Kaylee: How about now? Simon: No. Kaylee: Anything yet? Simon: I don’t even…Kaylee? What am I supposed to be looking…. (Cargo bay ramp comes down slowly…Kaylee comes walking partway down in her overalls, hair up in top knots, with her parasol, looking almost, but not exactly, like the first time he saw her) Kaylee: How about now? Simon (Takes a second to take it all in. Smiles) Hi. Kaylee: Hi. Simon (Bolts towards her) Kaylee (Squeals and runs inside the ship) Camera pulls back to see ships exterior, with sounds of Simon and Kaylee laughing filtering outside. --------------------------------------------------------------